Slashdot Mirror

← Back to Stories (view on slashdot.org)

Ohio Zoo Attempts To Mate Female Rhino With Her Brother For Species Survival

Posted by samzenpus on from the worst-blind-date-ever dept.

An anonymous reader writes "Unfortunately for the Sumatran rhino the fate of the species may boil down to a plan by the Cincinnati Zoo to breed their lone female with her little brother. 'We absolutely need more calves for the population as a whole; we have to produce as many as we can as quickly as we can,' said Terri Roth, who heads the zoo's Center for Research of Endangered Wildlife. 'The population is in sharp decline and there's a lot of urgency around getting her pregnant.'"

20 of 272 comments (clear)

  1. So... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 4, Funny

    It's come to this!

    1. Re:So... by hawkinspeter · · Score: 4, Funny

      Must remember to buy cat food

      --
      You're a temporary arrangement of matter sliding towards oblivion in a cold, uncaring universe
    2. Re:So... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 4, Funny

      http://xkcd.com/1022/

  2. Oh so it's ok for animals but not for us? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    I hate humans...

    1. Re:Oh so it's ok for animals but not for us? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      It is worse than that. According to PETA, animals can't speak and give verbal consent so anytime they do have sex it is rape. To make matters worse I understand the the little brother rhino is underage. Therefore the Cincinnati zoo is running a underage incestuous animal brothel. How can we allow this to happen. I demand that the administrators of the zoo be locked up.

      Won't someone think of the Rhinos?

    2. Re:Oh so it's ok for animals but not for us? by davester666 · · Score: 3, Funny

      And do what?

      Move them to Arkansas or Alabama, where it's legal?

      --
      Sleep your way to a whiter smile...date a dentist!
    3. Re:Oh so it's ok for animals but not for us? by shentino · · Score: 5, Funny

      Don't worry, they're plenty horny enough.

    4. Re:Oh so it's ok for animals but not for us? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

      Woah woah woah. We don't allow any of that "Same Species marriage" business around here.

      Now, man-on-rhino, that's jest fine.

  3. Kinky. by Black+Parrot · · Score: 3, Funny

    If it was good enough for the pharaohs, it's good enough for the rhinos.

    --
    Sheesh, evil *and* a jerk. -- Jade
    1. Re:Kinky. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

      If it was good enough for the pharaohs, it's good enough for the rhinos.

      Also, Cincinnati is just across the Ohio river from Kentucky, the land of five million people and fifteen last names.

  4. Incest is best.... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    Put your sister to the test!

    1. Re:Incest is best.... by dmbasso · · Score: 3, Funny

      The brother was humping his sister, when she said "you fuck much better than dad." He then replied "yeah, mom said the same."

      --
      `echo $[0x853204FA81]|tr 0-9 ionbsdeaml`@gmail.com
  5. Re:I volunteered by Black+Parrot · · Score: 4, Funny

    but was ignominiously rejected.

    By the zoo, or by the rhino?

    --
    Sheesh, evil *and* a jerk. -- Jade
  6. Not exactly tech news... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    Roth, who began working on the rhino project in 1996, said it took years just to understand their eating habits and needs and decades more to understand their mating patterns. The animals tend not to be interested in companionship, let alone romance.

    Oh. I think I see the connection to Slashdot now.

  7. Re:CREW by OhANameWhatName · · Score: 5, Funny

    CREW biologists jerked off the rhino while he gorged himself. Pretty much any man's dream, right?

    I'm just spitballing here, but you wouldn't happen to be a woman would you?

  8. Re:Like in the Bible! by etash · · Score: 5, Funny

    A University Of Sarcasm Diploma.

  9. Re:Like in the Bible! by AK+Marc · · Score: 4, Funny

    He's a pastor. He downloaded a certificate to prove it.

    --
    Learn to love Alaska
  10. Eliphinos by Ukab+the+Great · · Score: 3, Funny

    Can be the backup plan if incest doesn't work. The only disadvantage would be that a viable eliphino would make the joke less funny.

    1. Re:Eliphinos by drinkypoo · · Score: 3, Funny

      Can be the backup plan if incest doesn't work. The only disadvantage would be that a viable eliphino would make the joke less funny.

      Also, you're going to need a LMC (large mammal collider) in order to smash them together with sufficient force to achieve fusion.

      --
      "You're right," Fisheye says. "I should have set it on 'whip' or 'chop.'"
  11. Re:Like in the Bible! by etash · · Score: 3, Funny

    exactly. "i got butthurt therefore i pointed out a spelling error". epic fail.