Slashdot Mirror


Driver Arrested In Ohio For Secret Car Compartment Full of Nothing

schwit1 writes about the hazards of driving through Ohio in a car with a secret compartment in the trunk. From the article: "Norman Gurley, 30, is facing drug-related charges in Lorain County, Ohio, despite the fact that state troopers did not actually find any drugs in his possession. Ohio passed a law in 2012 making it a felony to alter a vehicle to add a secret compartment with the 'intent' of using it to conceal drugs for trafficking." This is the first person arrested under the strange law.

15 of 670 comments (clear)

  1. We can all sleep peacefully now... by Press2ToContinue · · Score: 3, Funny

    that this car is is prison.

    --
    Sent from my ENIAC
  2. Re:Not the only state with this law by fahrbot-bot · · Score: 4, Funny

    If it keeps us safe from terrorists, drugs, child molesters, or other Bad Things, anything is okay. Sacrifice all of your freedoms to stop the Bad Things and just be thankful you're living in the land of the free and the home of the brave.

    Unfortunately, I like to keep all my freedoms in a secret compartment in my car - damn.

    --
    It must have been something you assimilated. . . .
  3. Same stupid thing by no-body · · Score: 1, Funny

    as all those stop signs on crossings where one can see traffic 1/2 mile each side.

    Which leads to the question how much fuel is wasted bringing all those huge masses of big cars to a full stop, then accelerating again - all just satisfying the rules....

  4. Re:Mind Readers? Thought Crime? by Fwipp · · Score: 5, Funny

    Well, you see, he's black: http://www.nuttynewstoday.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/Norman-Gurley.png

    Therefore, he's obviously all caught up in drugs, and the police have done a fine service by removing this violent criminal from society.

  5. Re:You're allowed to have secret compartments by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0, Funny

    Yeah well your sister has been showing them off on the internet. They aren't so secret anymore.
    That dirty fucking whore.

    P.S. what's her number?

  6. Re:Not the only state with this law by darkmeridian · · Score: 4, Funny

    Seriously, if I had a secret compartment in my car, I would keep a copy of the King James Bible, a copy of the Constitution and Bill of Rights, and a registered handgun in there.

    --
    A NYC lawyer blogs. http://www.chuangblog.com/
  7. Re:Not the only state with this law by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny

    Seriously, if I had a secret compartment in my car, I would keep a copy of the King James Bible, a copy of the Constitution and Bill of Rights, and a registered handgun in there.

    I do the same with my asshole when flying to the states, except of course for the registered handgun.

  8. Re:How did they prove intent? by Dahamma · · Score: 5, Funny

    Thanks for clearing that up. We were all desperately hoping the missing word wasn't "ass"...

  9. Re:Not the only state with this law by fuzzyfuzzyfungus · · Score: 4, Funny

    I know Florida has had a law on the books like this for a while and I'm sure other states do as well. I get why they think they need it but it's a serious abuse of our individual rights as it essentially makes it so you are assumed guilty.

    Those who have nothing to hide have nothing to fear! Umm, as long as they don't try to hide the nothing, in which case Gitmo 'em!

  10. Re:Not the only state with this law by compro01 · · Score: 4, Funny

    Why on earth do you think that a hidden compartment in a car owned by a small business owner who has bank transaction records showing he deposits his business takings in cash to the bank each day/week would run afoul of a law that reads:

    "No person shall knowingly operate, possess, or use a vehicle with a hidden compartment with knowledge that the hidden compartment is used or intended to be used to facilitate the unlawful concealment or transportation of a controlled substance."

    "Controlled substance" means a drug, compound, mixture, preparation, or substance included in schedule I, II, III, IV, or V. "

    He's transporting cash.
    Practically all US currency contains traces of cocaine
    Therefore, he is transporting cocaine, a schedule II substance.

    Book 'im Danno.

    --
    upon the advice of my lawyer, i have no sig at this time
  11. Re:Not the only state with this law by arth1 · · Score: 5, Funny

    Seriously, if I had a secret compartment in my car, I would keep a copy of the King James Bible, a copy of the Constitution and Bill of Rights, and a registered handgun in there.

    The constitution and amendments, I can understand, but please lose the instrument of murder.
    And the gun too.

  12. Re:Not the only state with this law by Sentrion · · Score: 5, Funny

    In between drug runs I would chose to keep a ziploc bag of dog shit in the secret compartment. That way when I get pulled over and my secret compartment is discovered, if they ask "what do you keep in here?" I'd just say "I keep my shit in there." Then when they start poking and sniffing around they can't say I didn't warn them. I'd like to see them bring me to trial for having a compartment full of shit.

  13. Re:Not the only state with this law by bemymonkey · · Score: 4, Funny

    "Then again, we have another law that lets women go topless on hot days."

    You neglected to mention where you live, and whether the girls are hot to go with the days... :)

  14. Re:Not the only state with this law by wonkey_monkey · · Score: 5, Funny

    "burglarious instruments"

    Got their second album.

    --
    systemd is Roko's Basilisk.
  15. Re:Not the only state with this law by amicusNYCL · · Score: 4, Funny

    But wait, there's more!

    In order for a woman to drive a car legally in Memphis, Tennessee, a man must walk or run in front of it while waving a red flag to warn other motorists and pedestrians.

    In order to remain in good standing with the law in Forest City, North Carolina, one must call City Hall before entering town in an automobile.

    In Colorado, you are breaking the law if you drive a black car on Sundays.

    It's illegal to drive a motor vehicle in Redlands, California, unless a man holding a lantern is walking in front of it.

    In Glendale, Arizona, it's against the law to drive a car in reverse.

    While driving along a country road at night in Pennsylvania, motorists must fire a rocket signal and wait 10 minutes for livestock to clear the road before continuing.

    And one of my favorite Arizona laws: You may not have more than two dildos in a house.

    There's also this one: When being attacked by a criminal or burglar, you may only protect yourself with the same weapon that the other person posseses.

    That makes a real obvious way for criminals to completely run amok in this state: all they have to do is use 3 dildos to attack someone.

    --
    "Our two-party system is like a bowl of shit looking at itself in a mirror." - Lewis Black