Slashdot Mirror
Leak Reveals Government Conspiracy, Atrocity
First time accepted submitter Sigmon writes An unauthorized wave recently broadcast on the Cortex has revealed not only the existence of a previously unknown settlement on a far away border world called Miranda but also that the entire population of settlers was inadvertently wiped out by a top-secret Alliance program. Miranda was purportedly used as a testing ground for G-23 Paxilon Hydrochlorate, or simply "Pax" — a chemical agent designed to calm the population and weed out aggression. It seems the test did not go as planned. Also, reporters have been dispatched to the location of a battle not far from Miranda's location where the Alliance fleet has apparently suffered significant losses. It is unknown if the two events are related at this time. When contacted for comment on these events, government officials were very tight-lipped, however one official responded with a confusing statement about "Damming a river."
I would like to sincerely thank the /. editors for lightening up an otherwise mundane day with these hilarious stories that take famous sci-fi settings and extend the story with almost sitcom-y type situations. I kept laughing and laughing, and all my coworkers were asking me what was wrong, why I kept snickering. Each story was more uproarious than the last, and just when I thought that surely these jokers couldn't outdo themselves, they would go and prove me wrong. Kudos for another phenomenal year and what was obviously a lot of time and trouble coming up with first-rate tomfoolery. It's what keeps me coming back here consistently. Salut!
(Now that was an April Fools joke!)
I remember when Slashdot used to put an effort into coming up with some story that was just plausible enough to have people wondering whether it was an April Fools joke or not. But today, this year? No attempt at plausibility whatsoever. Just lame summaries hashing out old Sci-Fi plot lines.
It's weak, man.
Even from dice-droids I expect better than this.
I do not fail; I succeed at finding out what does not work.
It's not funny any more, not even by april fools standards. Just please stop so we can forget this wretched day for another year.