Slashdot Mirror
Comcast Officially Gives Up On TWC Merger
An anonymous reader writes: Confirming speculation from yesterday, Comcast announced this morning that its attempt to merge with Time Warner Cable has been terminated. The announcement was very brief, but indicated that regulatory pressure was the reason they killed the deal. CEO Brian Roberts said, "Today, we move on. Of course, we would have liked to bring our great products to new cities, but we structured this deal so that if the government didn't agree, we could walk away." The Washington Post adds, "The move by regulators to throw up roadblocks shows that the government has grown concerned about massive media conglomerates bigfooting rivals that are finding success by streaming content over the Internet, analysts said. And after years of approving a wave of mergers in the industry — including that of Comcast and NBC Universal in 2011 — federal officials are taking a new tone, they said."
It is truly sad that we will be deprived of Time Warner getting the Customer Service that Comcast is (in)famous for, while at the same time Comcast getting the forward looking understanding of technology that Time Warner, a copyright focused company would have brought to the relationship.
I'll see your senator, and I'll raise you two judges.
You can buy all of the government some of the time, and some of the government all of the time, but . . .
it takes a lot of money to buy all of the government, all of the time. So that option is only available to oil companies and major defense contractors.
I'll see your senator, and I'll raise you two judges.
This really suggests that the Comcast/TWC merger had more to do with empire building (or expanding an effective monopoly) than good business.
Too often, mergers and acquisitions are driven by ego and result in an overall conglomerate that is less efficient.
You want a big company to actually do what it promised it will do? Why do you hate America?
Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.
anyone else?
Everyone else
The only thing necessary for evil to triumph is for it to be pitted against a slightly greater evil
Ceo Roberts: take a message! "Today, we move on. The heralding of the 6th star of ocorium and the death of all that grows to chew the cud as the mighty beast arises has been circumvented. The runes of pestilence have not siphoned the blood of the babe, as was foretold in our prophetic lore of bundling. Today, we stand apart, our hellmouths never to entwine and form a new dead god. Comcast and Time warner will never be able to take our great products to new cities into which wrack and desolation shall grind the bones of the damned to dust, and succor a distant memory of a world once living. The government has seen fit to meddle in that which they can never understand, to oppose the will of Baal our dark lord and in so doing unlock the very amulet that is the dawn of their obliteration. We structured this amalgamation, or as you laughably know it as "the deal" in a pact of dark blood, an ichor stronger than christs own bleached bones, in that it may be transmutated and reformed should such blasphemous interference take place. Today, we walk this earth upon damned hooves of..." ....o...okay....so im just going to trim this up for tomorrows soundbyte o-on....on CNN, is that alri-
PR Executive:
CEO Roberts: Yes it must be hewn into a frame that fits the skull of a black ram to be delivered upon the masses as per the divination
PR Executive: uh...im thinking...8x11
CEO Roberts: Yes. use the eights of eleven to elucidate our will to the sheep. Dorris in accounting has a spare ream i believe.
Good people go to bed earlier.
It's nice to know that money can't always buy government representatives all the time.
Too many people hated Concast for this to work. Had it gone through, well.... I'm fairly certain there would have been a black hole knocked off course or something somewhere :-)
Honestly they've simply pissed off way to many people. They have a serious PR issue which has lasted for years and they were arrogant enough to believe it wasn't going to prevent this from happening.
Personally I'm pleased and hope for more (not less) competition in the Industry.
Yeah I know. That's a tough wish. maybe I'll go find a Buddha belly and rub it for good luck :D
Has Comcast disconnected your Internet account? Same here. You can read about it at http://comcastissue.blogspot.com
It's nice to know that money can't always buy government representatives all the time.
Just give them a little more time.
2017 headline: Time-Warner/Comcast merger approved by a last-minute, late night amendment to the Veterans Administration funding bill.
SJW's don't eliminate discrimination. They just expropriate it for themselves.
Unless Comcast acquired NBC/Universal's property, but not the company itself (like a bankruptcy asset purchase) then I don't see them getting out of the NBC obligations. When a company purchases another company outright it keeps those obligations. One of the big banks that absorbed one of the big mortgage lenders still had to deal with billions of dollars in fines from that mortgage lender if I'm remembering correctly, and if the bankers couldn't get out of it, a few media moguls sure as hell aren't going to.
Do not look into laser with remaining eye.
"Of course, we would have liked to bring our great products to new cities, but we structured this deal so that if the government didn't agree, we could walk away"
"...and besides, fuck you."
Celebrating here! With One More Time by Daft Punk from you tube no less! Once it's done buffering that is!
And before someone comes along telling me how it's all the fault of local governments that we have these monopolies, that's simply not true. The reason these local monopolies exist, is that for decades the cable operators required these exclusivity agreements from the local governments as a condition of even serving their municipal area. It was not that the local governments decided to force these monopolies upon the cable companies against their will.
NBC Universal, Time Warner (not to be confused with TWC, a different company), ABC/Disney, CBS/Viacom, Fox...
Don't kid yourself as to why the regulators were tough on this one...
no NBC Universal is owned by Comcast
---Saying gnome 3 is better than windows 8 not so much a compliment as it is damning with light praise.
Comcast are being investigated. One of the conditions of the NBC Universal / Comcast deal was that HULU would remain independent from Comcast oversight. The WSJ (IIRC) reported that Comcast was directly involved in a meeting between high-level execs when HULU was being considered for sale. Comcast convinced the execs in question not to sell.
Today, we move on. Of course, we would have liked to bring our great products to new cities, but it turned out we don't actually have any. This took us by surprise but a quick poll among our executive staff came to the result that nobody actually knows how we make money or why we're still in business. Money comes in, certainly, and from what I could gather some of it is government money so we seem to be providing some kind of service, I guess. And some of it to the government, it seems. But the exact nature of this service remains a mystery.
Look, I only wanted to merge with Time Warner Cable because the guys over there seem to know what kind of business they're in and I figured it could be a learning experience. Now that that plan has been kiboshed, could anyone tell me what it is that we actually do? I heard some speculation that we do something with the internet but from what I can tell we don't have anything resembling a broadband infrastructure so that can't be it. We do have call centers but when I called one they didn't know anything about the internet, either. Perhaps we're some kind of telemarketing outfit?
Seriously, if anyone has an idea what our business plan is, please drop me a line at ceo@comca.st.
USE HOT GRITS WITH STATUE OF NATALIE PORTMAN (NAKED AND PETRIFIED)
And Google, And Apple, And ...
Neither Apple nor Google have made enough payments yet; the FBI director is still loudly accusing them of supporting terrorists and pedophiles.
Thanks to the War on Drugs, it's easier to buy meth than it is to buy cold medicine!
Dear Comcast:
I know this is hard to figure out, but I found a map of areas that you could bring your products to.
Comcast and Time Warner in 1 Map
You can start by wiring those areas that are blue, then proceed into the areas that are white.
No need to thank me.
-- I have monkeys in my pants.