Node.js v4.0.0 Released
New submitter TFlan91 writes: The first merge of the popular Node.js and io.js repositories has been released! From the announcement: "The collaborators of the Node.js project and the members of the Node.js Foundation are proud to offer v4.0.0 for general release. This release represents countless hours of hard work encapsulated in both the Node.js project and the io.js project that are now combined in a single codebase. The Node.js project is now operated by a team of 44 collaborators, 15 of which form its Technical Steering Committee (TSC). Further, over 100 new individuals have been added to the list of people contributing code to core since v0.12.7."
Can't wait to read all about the hate slashdot has for node.. again.
It's alive!
I've been trying to get started with Node for some time because I'm currently using XML. Is Node better or worse than XML?
You are all cows. Cows say moo. MOOOOOO! MOOOOO! Moo cows MOOOOO! Moo say the cows. YOU JAVASCRIPT COWS!!
0.12 to 4.0 wtf?
Well, maybe, especially if you don't bother counting...
That is all.
So a little while ago I felt like I had a great big healthy shit coming on. I mean it makes sense. I have been adding more fiber to my diet lately. So I sat on my white porcelain throne and then ... *unghhnhhghhghh* *PLOP*
Ah. Wow that was a big one. Damn it this is a big, wide, long log. It'll probably fold in half and get stuck
and clog the fucking toilet. Again. Ah well. I will deal with that if and when it happens.
... oh no. I feel something knotty.
Yup, what I feared from this turd has come to pass. I have lots of hairs around my asshole. I suppose most men
do. Nature's way of saying "I love you! But not that much."
It was such a wide turd-log with such girth though. Amazing that my otherwise virgin asshole can expand that wide. Hmm that could be a problem. So I start to wipe. Damn it this could take a while. I got feces smeared on the sides of my ass cheeks from the girth of that turd. I wipe some more and
There it is. I can feel it through the single ply paper. A great big DINGLEBERRY. Naturally I try to awkwardly grab it with a folded sheet of toilet paper and dislodge it. I pull. Ouch. I pull harder. OUCH. Wow during its brief passage past the asshair, this turd-let really securely managed to get caught on some ass hairs. I can't just pull the dingleberry out without ripping the hairs right out. I have no idea if that caries the possibility of breaking the fecal encrusted skin and leading to an infection or what, but I know it would hurt so I want other options. I try gathering lots of sheets of toilet paper. I repeatedly wipe the same area over and over, hoping to wear this fucker down. I manage to whittle it down a little but this is taking far too much time. This turd is really determined to stay in its new home!
I can't very well pull my underpants back up now, that would get them all shitty and smelly. If I wanted to smell bad all the time I would let myself get fat. Maybe some water will help. I awkwardly reach for the faucet, turning it to a slow stream, and wet some toilet paper, making a mental note to disinfect the faucet handle later. I can't see the damned thing but judging from the brown stains appearing on the sheets of toilet paper, I am at least making progress. Now my hands are wet and shitty smelling and I am thinking this better be worth it. I use a dry sheet to feel for the dingleberry again. It did shrink but it's still there, dangling from my ass hairs, mocking me. WTF have I been eating lately to produce such a persistent turd? Nature does abhor a vacuum, which is why lots of gas has entered my bowels where the big turd-log recently was. I enjoy a nice after-defecating loud fart while I wonder what to do next. I chuckle because when the fart is your own, you don't think it stinks but you know somebody else would evacuate the area. Ok time to stop laughing, this is a serious predicament.
I toy with the idea of getting some scissors or something to try and cut the dingleberry out. Then I consider this is a sensitive area, I cannot see what I am doing, and it's too close for comfort to my cock and balls to be wielding a bladed item. I am starting to get angry. I am starting to not care anymore about the consequences of just yanking the damned thing out. I tried the easier ways and they failed. Fuck it, I have places to be and things to do. I can't very well spend all day in the bathroom playing a not-so-fun game with a turd. I double up on toilet paper and get a good secure grip on the dingleberry. Okay fucker, you're going DOWN. *YANK* Yeouch, fuck that hurt as much as I thought it would. And there it is, in my hand, nestled in the folds of toilet paper: my dingleberry! Ha ha ha, you won the battle, dingleberry, but I just won the war! I rub my sore ass cheek. Then I ceremoniously plop that fucker in the toilet bowl, to briefly swim with his big brother log. Oh man, you never heard such a satisfying flushing sound in your life. I rub some aftershave around my
Take a look at your Noscript window sometime, the web is just that, a tangled mess of shit. What we need is fewer new shinies and more clean light content. YOU render the text for me, server, don't demand that I render it for you.
That's quite a jump in version numbers: from 0.12.7 to 4.0.0! Windows has got nothin' on that. From another article:
Having a converged project means converged release numbers which is why Node.js is jumping to v4.0 and avoiding overlap with any existing io.js version numbers.
This explanation doesn't persuade me. The version number is namespaced by the product name. It would have been Node 0.13, not io.js 0.13. I wouldn't have gotten confused.
I never heard about much version-number skipping until recently: Windows 10, PHP 7, and now Node 4. Has this always happened every now and then? It seems like before, doing just a dubious major-number increment, like from 3.4 to 4.0 instead of just to 3.5, would cause controversy.
I don't get the node.js fanfare. I've been trying to figure out what's so great about it and Just Plain Don't See It, except for specialized niches, such as high-volume chat-rooms.
The claims about improved parallelism or speed don't seem to hold up when specific scenarios are requested and analyzed, at least for "regular" web programming tasks.
Sorry, in Vegas I'll bet against it as a general revolution. I've given the fans plenty of chances to demonstrate concrete general benefits. I've been around a while and it smells like the hype patterns I've seen before.
Well, you can at least establish a finite maximum since the last release, amirite?
I am genuinely looking for an alternative. Must be scripted for ease of deployment and event driven. Does anyone have any suggestions?
Thanks.
Apparently, according to this PHP 6/7 RFC, version 6 of software is bad...
I can think of... Total Commander 6, Opera 6, VB6 (hated here, but still)... I think Photoshop 6 may well used too.
Amazing to see news on Node.js on slashdot. There has been many important developments with node over the last year but nothing at all on slashdot. Glad to see someone is paying attention to the developments of this very important project.
Some important features added since v0.12 for instance around synchronous child process execution is essential for node to be utilized on non event based coding styles.
Regarding merging of node.js and io.js into a common stack supported by the node foundation, this is an awesome move. Node is too big for BDFL model and forking is not good at this stage. I don't really care about versioning model but going all the way to version 4 is a bit odd.
It's funny how much slashdot hates javascript, yet it is still the most popular and most used language.
I think you all have programming language envy, and are sorry that you didn't learn it sooner.
Having seen what this does, and having written software in a lot of different other languages (ok I started with basic, but went on to Pascal/TurboPascal, Cobol, C, Prolog, Lisp, at least 2 architectures of assembly (but I think maybe actually 3), APL, I learned compilers in modula-2 and a few others I can't even remember learning, (at one point I knew IBM CICS and JCL) and have studies various design methodologies (AI has different requirements than setting a J-K flip flop to a high state). Node seems to be just a crutch for those who can't design well. You can write that stuff down on a white board and check each one. Likewise, incremental testing will get you 100% of the way without having to worrying about a block of code within a much larger block of code that doesn't work. You could build modular and call, or even just build modular, test, then insert that code block into another code block, knowing each work as tested. It depends on exactly how anal retentive you insist on being. Anal retentive is good if you don't really understand the process, and feel the need to grasp the security blanket. When I was in university studying CS, I needed to take a general liberal arts requirement course, and took photography (shooting, developing, layout/mounting). I learned the algorithms for push and pull processing. Following the rules means one way of doing things, but I saved hundreds of developer-hours by intentionally over exposing the film and under developing (but you had to be quick pulling out of the developer bath and dumping the roll into the stop bath --eyes on stopwatch). Since the university mixed chemicals may not be that new either, keeping the film out of the muck for as little time as possible meant better prints. Node looks like a well organized stick to keep people in line, something a boss would use to herd unruly developers, but as an independent, you have your own reasons to keep code clean and well tested, and node seems to be a way of having the stick built-in.
Hey hipsters there is something waay soo cool in Erlang 2.0 aka OTP Pyschobith beats Node.JS anyday!!!
http://saveie6.com/
Here's a crazy idea.
Since, unlike browsers, node.js doesn't have 2 decades of code demanding backward compatibility, why not use node.js to FIX JAVASCRIPT. The Node.js devs could write a pre-process that barfs up big, clear, helpful errors whenever it encounters the kind of risky code BS we all have come to despise.
Just think, you could feed the typical garbage to node.js and it could spit back things like:
ERROR: Potential scope conflicts on the following lines. Explicitly declare all variables using "var = ".
WARNING: Nested function limit exceeded. The following lines call to the global scope, not the enclosing function's scope. Add "fixNestedFunctions = true" to config/index.js or accept one of the weirdest, sickest sources of potential bugs the world has ever seen as the norm in you code.
You get the idea.... Use the enthusiasm to make a better world!
Every rule has more than one consequence.