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Scientists Confirm There Was Life On Earth 3.5 Billion Years Ago (qz.com)

Paleobiologists have confirmed today that life forms existed some 3.5 billion years ago. The new study, published in the journal Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, uses the latest techniques to date the most aged remains available. Quartz reports: The research, led by paleobiologist William Schopf of the University of California-Los Angeles and geoscientist John Valley of the University of Wisconsin-Madison, has been in the works for what seems a long time to most, but which the academics know is merely a blink of the eye in terms of life on Earth. The specimens in question, mostly now-extinct bacteria and microbes, were found in 1982 at the Apex Chert, a rock formation in Western Australia, in a piece of rock. In 1993, based on radiometric analyses of the rock, and the shape of fossils, Schopf dated them as biological beings that existed 3.45 billion years ago. The rock held the earliest direct evidence of life, Schopf thought, and inferred from it that creatures existed over a billion years earlier than anyone previously believed. But some scientists argued that this claim was too speculative and that the microfossils, invisible to the naked eye, were really just weirdly-shaped bits of rock, strange minerals that only seem to contain biological specimens but do not.

Since then, technology has improved and Schopf and Valley teamed up to devise a new way to analyze the rock specimen, which now lives in the London Museum of Natural History. Valley spent 10 years developing a method to analyze the individual species that are shaped like tiny cylinders and filaments. Any type of organic substance (including both rock and microbe) contains a characteristic mix of carbon isotopes. Using a secondary ion mass spectrometer (a very rare tool, one of which is housed at the University of Wisconsin), the scientists were able to separate the carbon in each fossil into isotopes. That way, they could measure the carbon-isotope makeup of each fossil, and compare those to fossil-less rocks from the same era. [...] After analyzing the microfossils individually, they identified five species, concluding that two were photosynthesizers, two were methane-consuming organisms, and one produced methane.

176 comments

  1. Evolution by theweatherelectric · · Score: 3, Funny

    And 3.5 billion years later life spends its days on Slashdot. Progress?

    1. Re: Evolution by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

      And 3.5 billion years later, Donald Trump evolved. Life doesn't always get it right

    2. Re:Evolution by AmiMoJo · · Score: 1

      If you call this a life...

      --
      const int one = 65536; (Silvermoon, Texture.cs)
      SJW, n: "Someone I don't like, and by the way I'm a fuckwit" - AC
    3. Re: Evolution by Opportunist · · Score: 1, Funny

      Trump IS proof for evolution.

      I mean, look at this man and then talk to me with a straight face about "Intelligent Design".

      --
      We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
    4. Re:Evolution by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I'll get back to you after carbon-dating the sediment.

    5. Re:Evolution by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Thank God the microbes have progressed from emitting methane to emitting Alcohol.
      This is proof there is a caring god.

    6. Re: Evolution by Maritz · · Score: 1

      Donald Trump, and Marxism. Those are your two choices, people. Choose... uhm, 'wisely'.

      --
      I do not want your cheap brainburning drugs. They are useless for work. And I am a working man today.
    7. Re: Evolution by Maritz · · Score: 4, Funny

      Yeah Trump wasn't designed. 'Congealed' maybe.

      --
      I do not want your cheap brainburning drugs. They are useless for work. And I am a working man today.
    8. Re: Evolution by mark-t · · Score: 1

      It seems that it could be construed as evidence that man's ascent from simpler lifeforms hasn't even started yet.

    9. Re: Evolution by Opportunist · · Score: 1

      Well, some remained simpler than others.

      --
      We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
    10. Re:Evolution by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

      Life? Don't talk to me about life. Here I am, brain the size of a planet... And I have this pain in the diodes all down my left side.

      -- Marvin

    11. Re: Evolution by Brockmire · · Score: 1

      Has moderation added "bot" yet?

  2. And it ended Nov. 2016 by Tablizer · · Score: 0, Offtopic

    nuf sed

    1. Re:And it ended Nov. 2016 by NicknameUnavailable · · Score: 0, Offtopic

      Nah, that's just when the emotion-riddled tards began weeping, the rest of America is progressing better than is has over the last several decades by every objective measure.

    2. Re:And it ended Nov. 2016 by sabbede · · Score: 1

      Not all life, just that of very many turkeys. But that happens every November.

  3. Eukaryotes, pfffft [Re:Evolution] by Tablizer · · Score: 5, Funny

    And 3.5 billion years later life spends its days on Slashdot. Progress?

    Back in my day we had to force ourselves to commit mitosis and grow flagellum to troll. It was painful; be grateful.

  4. don't be silly the bible says by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0, Redundant

    the eath is only 6000 years old .

    1. Re:don't be silly the bible says by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Informative

      The bible never said that.

    2. Re: don't be silly the bible says by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Your comment comes over as far more aggressive than the one you were replying to.

      As to mostly 'harmless (sic) faery tales' - they may be harmless, but just think about the harm does in the name of ALL religions.

    3. Re: don't be silly the bible says by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Hatred and stupidity should be met with overwhelming response. Just because he (at this particular moment) was 'only' mildly offensive doesn't mean he isn't the kind of asshole who gets on people's cases for saying merry Christmas or cheers when churches are burned. Also the message must be clear to all faux atheists (really just members of anti-Christian church): your ignorance and hatred will not be tolerated, is not funny (except to other hateful assholes) and will be called out in the strongest possible way by your greatest enemy: real atheists who are reclaiming a once good word they destroyed.

      He's an ignorant asshole. I stand by both posts.
       

    4. Re: don't be silly the bible says by Opportunist · · Score: 5, Insightful

      Here's the thing: I don't mind hearing Merry Christmas (but I slowly start to DO mind hearing "Last Christmas". C'mon. George is dead, let the song follow). You wish me a Merry Christmas, I'll probably reply in kind.

      What bothers me is the asshats that get ballistic if you wish them "Happy Holidays". Who then berate you for wishing them well that "this is a christian nation".

      NO. Fuck it, it's not. It's a secular nation. If you want to live in a theocracy, go to fucking Iran. And take a good look at the whole area to get an idea what it leads to if you base your laws on the power fantasies written down by bigoted barbarians millennia ago when it was a-ok to just bash someone's head in because he has the wrong imaginary friend.

      --
      We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
    5. Re: don't be silly the bible says by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Ignorant moron. I'm a devout atheist but not an anti-atheist. Or more specifically a hateful anti-Christian like yourself.

      Why? Because I simply don't believe in the divine. Unlike you however I am not a religious but fuck who hates people because they believe in some mostly harmless faery tales. Yet you don't hate muslims or Buddhists or Taoist or Jews (well ok yes you do hate Jews but that's another post). Your anti Christian hatred is disturbing and makes real atheists look like hateful morons. Look like you.

      It's why I generally don't tell strangers I'm an atheist because they automatically assume I'm a hostile and agreesive moron. Like you.

      When I do open up I quickly explain the difference and that I'm ok with people who want to believe whatever as long as they don't push it on me. Like you do. Because you're a religious nutfuck of the lowest and worst kind.

      As far S your ignorant bullshit about the Bible goes, there were some morons who took the Bible literally and made some assumptions about life span and child bearing age in the "begat" section of Genesis to calculate the earth at just over 6000 years old. Just because a few drunks did some math on their fingers does not mean the Bible said that (it doesn't and never has in any version or edition), doesn't mean the rest of the Bible believers are morons too. You got all that? I'm sure not but whatever.

      Have a nice day.

      Wow, seriously. You seem to have some unresolved issues. I'm being serious.

    6. Re: don't be silly the bible says by goose-incarnated · · Score: 2

      Here's the thing: I don't mind hearing Merry Christmas (but I slowly start to DO mind hearing "Last Christmas". C'mon. George is dead, let the song follow). You wish me a Merry Christmas, I'll probably reply in kind.

      What bothers me is the asshats that get ballistic if you wish them "Happy Holidays".

      I've actually never had that happen to me. They give me strange looks, certainly, but no stranger than my neighbour who occasionally sends me videos of this or that person "proving" intelligent design because he thinks that being an atheist is an irrational decision.

      To be honest, I'm not sure how to respond to someone who goes ballistic for *any* greeting. Raised eyebrows? I can handle that. Religious propaganda/literature? Sure, I'll just throw it away anyway. Proselytizing? I'm not gonna argue, just get away if I can.

      But anger? What the hell do you do there? Get angry back? That doesn't help - now there's *two* angry people.

      --
      I'm a minority race. Save your vitriol for white people.
    7. Re: don't be silly the bible says by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Rampant runaway religiosity will do that to an individual after a while.

    8. Re: don't be silly the bible says by sabbede · · Score: 2

      Wait, he only said, "The Bible never said that", which you then agreed with. For all you know, the commentor was a devout Catholic.

    9. Re: don't be silly the bible says by Maritz · · Score: 1

      "devout atheist"

      Yeah. I devoutly don't collect stamps.

      You forgot to say that you're lying, and not an atheist at all.

      --
      I do not want your cheap brainburning drugs. They are useless for work. And I am a working man today.
    10. Re: don't be silly the bible says by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Wait, he only said, "The Bible never said that", which you then agreed with. For all you know, the commentor was a devout Catholic.

      Catholics go by the New Testament, not the Bible, which is a jewish book.

      Christ has revoked all previous Jewish laws, and left only one: Love one another.

      Jewish books have no place in Christianity.

    11. Re: don't be silly the bible says by Maritz · · Score: 2

      Oh no, the scary muslims are coming for us all. Grow a pair and stop being such a fucking pussy. Their bullshit is just as valid as yours.

      --
      I do not want your cheap brainburning drugs. They are useless for work. And I am a working man today.
    12. Re: don't be silly the bible says by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

      That is entirely possible. What's an eath?

    13. Re: don't be silly the bible says by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      ... millennia ago, when it was a-ok to just bash someone's head in ...

      Have you heard of the crusades, and after that, the witch trials? Then some countries took it to extremes with segregation and apartheid. Islam isn't the only religion to promote killing. Islam appeared in the dark ages, when Christianity was the established religion and plagiarizes much of the Christian bible.

      Christian religion mentions forgiveness in its sermons but actual peace in Christian nations is only a few hundred years old. The revival of science and changes to the workforce forced (France: Revolution, Russia: Revolution, UK: civil unrest) the separation of church and government. The USA and many Islamic nations didn't experience that, so they took longer to catch-up. Most Islamic nations are changing more slowly than westernized nations and some are going backwards (Afghanistan, Egypt, Turkey).

      You didn't get your (mostly) secular government because it was founded by Christians. You got it because Christian values changed society so that it no longer depended on Christian values.

    14. Re:don't be silly the bible says by edxwelch · · Score: 1

      Well, they were only off by 4,539,994,000 years.

    15. Re: don't be silly the bible says by Jason+Levine · · Score: 2

      If you want to live in a theocracy, go to fucking Iran. And take a good look at the whole area to get an idea what it leads to if you base your laws on the power fantasies written down by bigoted barbarians millennia ago when it was a-ok to just bash someone's head in because he has the wrong imaginary friend.

      The problem is that the people who would want to turn us into a theocracy always assume that THEY would be the ones determining which religion is in charge and THEY would be the ones bashing in someone else's head for following the wrong religion (or no religion). They never think that they might be on the other end of that head bashing.

      --
      My sci-fi novel, Ghost Thief, is now available from Amazon.com.
    16. Re: don't be silly the bible says by Opportunist · · Score: 1

      Christian values changed society so that it no longer depended on Christian values.

      You might want to explain this. It doesn't exactly make a lot of sense by itself.

      --
      We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
    17. Re: don't be silly the bible says by Opportunist · · Score: 2

      And you think that would mean that it looks any different than the Middle East does today? You have the same shit going on there, one group claiming to have the moral higher ground so they can suppress the rest, and the rest fighting back. Why does anyone think this would be different in any way if we tried the same shit here?

      --
      We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
    18. Re: don't be silly the bible says by Ol+Olsoc · · Score: 2

      >

      What bothers me is the asshats that get ballistic if you wish them "Happy Holidays". Who then berate you for wishing them well that "this is a christian nation"..

      Will you join us in the Ban Bing Crosby movement?

      He's the bastard that started the heresy with that damn Happy Holiday song.

      And he sung Little Drummer Boy with that creepy hippie David Bowie. Jesus has been waterboarding Crosby ever since that evil dude died.

      In the meantime, Thanksgiving, Saint Nicholas Day, Fiesta of Our Lady of Guadalupe, St. Lucia Day, Hanukkah, Christmas Day, Three Kings Day/Epiphany, Boxing Day, Kwanzaa, Omisoka, Yule, Saturnalia, Veteran's day, New Years day, Thanksgiving

      And Festivus for the restofus!

      There are a lot of holidays, and some that aren't Christmas are celebrated by a lot of people. Many that aren't Christmas are Christian Holidays that these right thinking people have chosen to ignore. November, December, and New Years are considered the Holiday season because there is a traffic jam of them right now.

      So - Happy Holidays folks,may you enjoy good health and happiness. May the new year bring you success. If that insults you or you don't like that, Go Fuck Yourselves.

      --
      The shepherds did so well protecting the flock that the sheep no longer believed that wolves existed.
    19. Re: don't be silly the bible says by Jason+Levine · · Score: 2

      Don't get me wrong. I don't think it'd be any different than the Middle East. I was just pointing out that the people who want a theocracy in the US assume that they would be in charge and thus somehow immune to any bad stuff that happens thanks to a theocracy. This is (one reason) why you can't rationally discuss this with them. They assume there will be no downside because they are in charge and wouldn't do anything to hurt themselves. Therefore, any downside is "someone else's" problem, not theirs.

      Of course the reality is that, were a theocracy instituted in the US, the "ruling religion" might be a slightly different sect of Christianity and they'd wind up on the receiving end of religious-based persecution. However, these kinds of people aren't very big on recognizing reality.

      --
      My sci-fi novel, Ghost Thief, is now available from Amazon.com.
    20. Re: don't be silly the bible says by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      No, Christ did not revoke the previous Jewish laws. He added one: forgiveness.

      Also, while Christ did say that loving one another was one of the most important commandments from what is called the old testament today, there was a commandment he specifically said was another even more important: loving God.

    21. Re: don't be silly the bible says by slashrio · · Score: 1

      it's 'butt fuck', you butt fuck.

      --
      "Trump!!", the new Godwin.
    22. Re: don't be silly the bible says by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Your post makes me aware that it is starting to look a lot like Christmas.

    23. Re: don't be silly the bible says by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

      Morons hijacked pagan festivities, Happy Winter Solstice mother fucker. Will Odin deliver presents to you? Do you hear Sleipnir hoofs on your roof?
      Is the Yule Log lit? are you celebrating Saturnalia with a feast?

    24. Re: don't be silly the bible says by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Yes, because we have Christians executing "undesirables" according to their holy texts, backed with the power of the state?

    25. Re: don't be silly the bible says by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I think you wishing them "happy holidays" is just you being a jerk and that their reaction to you being a jerk is to tell you to go fuck yourself.

    26. Re: don't be silly the bible says by Kjella · · Score: 1

      Wait, he only said, "The Bible never said that", which you then agreed with. For all you know, the commentor was a devout Catholic.

      Meh, it does have an unbroken genealogy from Adam and Eve via Noah, Abraham etc. to Jacob who was born ~2168 years after Creation. He went to Egypt's land when he was 130 years old, the Exodus was 430 years later, 480 years after that they built the temple, 345 years after that was the exile. This is generally agreed to be year 586 BC by our calendar. Add that up and you get 6000-ish years, there are no "and then millions of years passed" gaps.

      But like everything about the Bible that doesn't make sense it's just interpretation. The whole creation story is just an euphemism for big bang and evolution, there was no literal garden, apple or snake. The mental gymnastics people make to keep their faith in that book is amazing. I don't mean God in an abstract sense, but the particular God as described in the Bible. The guy who made a woman of a rib bone. That threw us out of Paradise because we wanted knowledge. Knocked us down because Babel built too big a tower. Wiped out entire cities like Sodom and Gomorrah with fire and brimstone. Drowned the whole world except Noah's ask in a flood. Asked Isaac to sacrifice his son as a proof of loyalty. And then sent his son down so he could forgive us.

      It's Stockholm syndrome, plain and simple.

      --
      Live today, because you never know what tomorrow brings
    27. Re: don't be silly the bible says by Ol+Olsoc · · Score: 1

      Your post makes me aware that it is starting to look a lot like Christmas.

      I like Christmas. I wonder if fundamentalists get pissed off that a lot of athiests really love Christmas? It actually looks like spring here though.

      --
      The shepherds did so well protecting the flock that the sheep no longer believed that wolves existed.
    28. Re: don't be silly the bible says by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Don't confuse the state with the people.

      Sensible.

      Besides, Sweden is likely to become markedly less secular in the future.

      And you lost it.

      Too bad.

    29. Re: don't be silly the bible says by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      People who react badly to any greeting (that's not a personal remark) have - issues.

      But it's worth remembering that the pilgrims fled to America specifically in order to found a theocracy. There was nothing preventing them from worshipping as they liked in England at that time - what they weren't permitted to do was to impose their morality on whole communities, on their non-believing neighbours, and that is what they found intolerable.

      So this kind of intolerance is bred very deep in American mythology, for all that a modern reading of the First Amendment might lead you to think otherwise.

    30. Re: don't be silly the bible says by crunchygranola · · Score: 2

      Christ has revoked all previous Jewish laws, and left only one: Love one another.

      Jewish books have no place in Christianity.

      Odd for a man who was an observant Jew, spend his entire life as an observant Jew, and died as one. In fact one of his most famous acts, which likely contributed to his trial and death was making a disruptive commotion about corruption of orthodox Jewish religious practice in the Temple during Passover.

      When did he revoke "all previous Jewish laws"?

      --
      Second class citizen of the New Gilded Age
    31. Re: don't be silly the bible says by bigdavex · · Score: 1

      "Do not think that I have come to abolish the Law or the Prophets; I have not come to abolish them but to fulfill them."
      -Matthew 5:17

      --
      -Dave
    32. Re: don't be silly the bible says by Brockmire · · Score: 1

      As an atheist, I love Christmas. Vacation, food, drinking and presents. I'm suspicious of people who don't like Christmas. Fuck those people, they're defective.

    33. Re: don't be silly the bible says by Brockmire · · Score: 1

      You should let the Pope know, it seems the Catholic Church has been doing it wrong.

    34. Re: don't be silly the bible says by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Christian values changed society so that it no longer depended on Christian values.

      You might want to explain this. It doesn't exactly make a lot of sense by itself.

      It probably makes more sense to talk about general human values (not killing each other, not stealing, treating others as you would wish to be treated if you were in their shoes, etc) that seem fairly universally accepted, even if we're not very good at applying them to outsiders (you even see concepts of fairness etc in non-human species). For a while, Christianity was dominant, and the label "Christian" was stuck on these values (potentially true for "Christians value X", false for "value X derives from Christianity"). Over time, it became more and more obvious that most of those values* were better served in a secular society.

      *Obviously there are some exceptions, given that things like "attending church" could also be considered Christian values, but I would argue those are of secondary importance compared to e.g. not killing, not stealing, the golden rule, and so on.

    35. Re: don't be silly the bible says by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      That threw us out of Paradise because we wanted knowledge.

      No, we were thrown out of paradise because we didn't just *want* knowledge... but actually went and disobeyed God. The fact that we may have done so simply because we wanted knowledge is immaterial.

      We are, after all, talking about a being whose very words are what makes reality. We are in absolutely no position to believe that we could possibly know any better than Him

      Knocked us down because Babel built too big a tower.

      No, He did so because they were intent on using the accomplishment to ascend to God, or to believe themselves as gods.

      Asked Isaac to sacrifice his son as a proof of loyalty.

      No, he asked Abraham to sacrifice his son Isaac as a proof of loyalty God stopped him before he could actually complete the deed.

    36. Re: don't be silly the bible says by cold+fjord · · Score: 1

      In summary you are not able to successfully identify the relevant issues, potential implications, and what drawbacks might be attached to them. . . .

      I suppose we can start with the basics. This is bad. The government was bad. The police were bad. The perpetrators were very, very bad.

      The things linked to here are bad too. The government was bad. The police were bad. The perpetrators were very, very bad.

      This is a pattern you will be seeing more of. Hopefully you survive any instance of it you are exposed to. (You might need someone's help.)

      --
      much of left-wing thought is a kind of playing with fire by people who don't even know that fire is hot - George Orwell
    37. Re: don't be silly the bible says by cold+fjord · · Score: 1

      ...when it was a-ok to just bash someone's head in because he has the wrong imaginary friend.

      "Antifa" ?

      The point being that "Antifa" advocates beating "Nazis" but basically defines nearly everyone as a "Nazi" because Punch Nazis!!!!!

      The label "Antifa" used by the current violent Left should be understood ironically.

      --
      much of left-wing thought is a kind of playing with fire by people who don't even know that fire is hot - George Orwell
    38. Re: don't be silly the bible says by Ol+Olsoc · · Score: 1

      As an atheist, I love Christmas. Vacation, food, drinking and presents. I'm suspicious of people who don't like Christmas. Fuck those people, they're defective.

      Booyeah! Visiting with family and friends, and a lot of my relatives are winemakers. Some really old traditions, like drinking shots of Kümmel, and my Aunt's kickass beef stuffing, And now that I'm retired I can eat poppyseed rolls again.

      --
      The shepherds did so well protecting the flock that the sheep no longer believed that wolves existed.
    39. Re: don't be silly the bible says by spitzak · · Score: 1

      What really is insane is this stupid complaints about "Happy Holidays". The reason people say that is not because they are devil-worshipping atheist SJWs. They say it because there are TWO holidays! And I'm not talking about Hanukkah or Kwanzaa, I am talking about WASP holidays called "Christmas" and "New Years". White rich right-wing good Americans take the whole week off and thus their friends may not see them until after BOTH holidays, so what the fuck are they supposed to say?

      The attempt to secularize Christmas was the term "XMas". Remember that? Probably not if you are younger than 40. It failed. The "war on Christmas" is over and Christmas won. But the crazy religious right will not get over it and keep pushing this nonsense.

      Happy Holidays!
         

    40. Re: don't be silly the bible says by Opportunist · · Score: 1

      Huh? Since when is religion as valid as science?

      I mean, outside of Texas.

      --
      We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
    41. Re: don't be silly the bible says by Opportunist · · Score: 1

      The values you cite are not religious values. Religious laws concerning not lying/stealing/killing only apply to others from the same religious group. I hope I needn't field examples where god himself told his chosen people that it's more than ok to kill, pillage and go on a rampage among the "other peoples" that they conquered, usually in the name of the lord or even with his aid.

      So please, don't gimme that "Christian values of not lying/stealing/murdering". Like every religion, these "values" were meant to ensure that WE can cooperate to bash THEM. Not to find a sensible way to coexist with others who think differently. If you read the book closely, you'll notice that "thinking differently" is often a good enough reason to kill that person altogether.

      And yes, the same applies to a lot of other religions, but that doesn't make it any better. It only makes these religions just as despicable.

      --
      We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
    42. Re: don't be silly the bible says by Opportunist · · Score: 1

      I don't. Not because or despite being an atheist, more because I'm a bitter Scrooge. Buying gifts for people you don't see all year (and when you see them you get reminded WHY you avoided them all year over), pushing and shoving in overheated stores (while you're wearing the big jackets because it's freezing outside, pretty much ensuring that you sweat inside and catch a cold as soon as you're back out), trying to snatch that last unit of some favorite toy for one of the spoiled brats one of your relatives pumps out every fucking year and fighting over that toy with someone who is just as desperate as you are, then having to move from one relative to the next, each and every single one of them stuffing you with the same crappy Christmas cookies you started to hate by the end of November already, nearly as much as "Last Christmas". Fuck it, George Michaels died last year but that song still gets played, why not the other way 'round?

      I honestly admire the patience and longanimity of salespeople that they can stomach hearing that fucking song every 10 or 15 minutes!

      No. Sorry. I can't enjoy Christmas. I enjoy the few days after when I finally am back at home, because that's the moment when it's the longest until that horror starts all over again.

      --
      We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
    43. Re: don't be silly the bible says by Opportunist · · Score: 1

      Could we just be thankful for 3 days off and not waste them on some superstitious nonsense? Just once?

      --
      We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
    44. Re: don't be silly the bible says by Opportunist · · Score: 1

      Fine, I'll not wish anyone anything. Next one to wish me Happy Holidays, Merry Christmas or whatever else will get a heartfelt "Yeah, fuck you, too!"

      --
      We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
    45. Re: don't be silly the bible says by sabbede · · Score: 1
      Interestingly, there's a Jewish tradition that God was planning to allow Adam and Eve to eat from the Tree the next day, but they were naughty and ate early.

      Personally, I see the story as a metaphor for ascending to sentience. Adam was an animal that spoke, walking around naming things for God, but not self-aware. The "garden" was blissful ignorance, and their punishment was knowledge of themselves; like, "I have to work every day?", and, "OH MY GOD GIVING BIRTH HURTS!!!"

    46. Re: don't be silly the bible says by sabbede · · Score: 1
      The text wasn't generally taken literally for most of its history. The modern idea of reading it as literal fact was a 19th century invention, but it wasn't the first time that was popular. It seems almost cyclical.

      The problem comes from the Jewish style of writing. Part historical fact (though generally filtered through generations of oral history), part moral education, part explanatory and part religious metaphor. Soddom and Gemorrah, for example, related the memory of two cities being destroyed by fire, explained the presence of unusual salt formations, reminded people not to disobey God, and reinforced the rules of hospitality (Lot was saved because he was a good host, the rest were not). The miracle of "Feeding the Multitude" may not ever have been intended to portray Jesus as being able to create bread and fish out of thin air, but how he was able to nourish their souls with his teaching.

    47. Re: don't be silly the bible says by Ol+Olsoc · · Score: 1

      I've actually never had that happen to me. They give me strange looks, certainly, but no stranger than my neighbour who occasionally sends me videos of this or that person "proving" intelligent design because he thinks that being an atheist is an irrational decision.

      To be honest, I'm not sure how to respond to someone who goes ballistic for *any* greeting. Raised eyebrows? I can handle that. Religious propaganda/literature? Sure, I'll just throw it away anyway. Proselytizing? I'm not gonna argue, just get away if I can.

      But anger? What the hell do you do there? Get angry back? That doesn't help - now there's *two* angry people.

      I've had a few get pissed. My reaction is laughing at them. I suspect someone may take a second amendment solution on me some day.

      Then Someone could truly say "He literally died laughing"

      --
      The shepherds did so well protecting the flock that the sheep no longer believed that wolves existed.
    48. Re: don't be silly the bible says by Ol+Olsoc · · Score: 1

      And you think that would mean that it looks any different than the Middle East does today? You have the same shit going on there, one group claiming to have the moral higher ground so they can suppress the rest, and the rest fighting back. Why does anyone think this would be different in any way if we tried the same shit here?

      Because their god is the right god. And it would be the same outcome. As a society based on one religion gained power, eventually there would be religion based warfare right here. Ideology and religion does not stay still. It's either waxing or waning. As it waxes, there is a demand to become more pure, to become less and less tolerant of other religions. And there you have it - an American version of the middle east, with agry gods who demand blood and death.

      --
      The shepherds did so well protecting the flock that the sheep no longer believed that wolves existed.
    49. Re: don't be silly the bible says by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Better than visit Iran, which is Muslim, Watch the HULU TV show Handmaid's Tale. Seriously, it's absolutely sickening, and so, so plausible.

    50. Re: don't be silly the bible says by Brockmire · · Score: 1

      I hear ya. All what you said rings true. If you had kids, it would be different. When my nephews stopped getting up at 7am and we could get up at 10am for the Christmas morning unwrapping, things got better. With Black Friday and Christmas shopping happening mostly online, the store part is mostly gone, too. Fuck Christmas songs. *hand motioning suicide* You just need a Christmas beej to get your spirit in the mood. And a Christmas bonus would probably go down well with you, too.

    51. Re: don't be silly the bible says by Brockmire · · Score: 1

      How come no one else reads this as butthurt diva? Design a being with free will, with brains designed to operate a certain way, and then throw a hissy fit the first moment they don't fucking listen? Where's the common sense? It's like kicking out your 2 year old baby for not doing as told. Anyway, it's all stupid, retarded shit that I have no idea it conned so many gullible people into believing the dumbest shit written.

    52. Re: don't be silly the bible says by tehcyder · · Score: 1

      Your post makes me aware that it is starting to look a lot like Christmas.

      His post is making me aware that some people have started on the Christmas Spirits (like vodka) early. Lucky bastard.

      --
      To have a right to do a thing is not at all the same as to be right in doing it
  5. Great, Old Ones! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

    Precambrian life forms are precambrian. Tekeli-li!

  6. Age of Earth 4.5 billion by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

    That means it only took life 1 billion years to evolve (shorter if you consider the early earth was inhospitable). That means it is really easy for life to evolve or strong support for pan-spermia ;that life was seeded from outside the solar system.

    1. Re: Age of Earth 4.5 billion by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Impossible to generalize when we only have evidence of one place (Earth) where life happened. Here is a plot based on... one data point.

    2. Re:Age of Earth 4.5 billion by Opportunist · · Score: 2

      A billion years still is a very, very long time. A billion years is less time than it took from single celled organism to humans.

      --
      We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
    3. Re:Age of Earth 4.5 billion by Opportunist · · Score: 5, Insightful

      Sorry. MORE TIME than it took from ... In other words, first multicellular organisms came into existence less than a billion years ago.

      I need more coffee.

      --
      We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
    4. Re: Age of Earth 4.5 billion by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I love drawing graphs from one data point. You can make it say whatever you want.

    5. Re:Age of Earth 4.5 billion by religionofpeas · · Score: 1

      And you said single where you meant multi. More coffee.

    6. Re:Age of Earth 4.5 billion by Opportunist · · Score: 1

      Yeah, a billion years ago there were still single celled organisms and only 200 mia later we had multi... you know what I mean, now let me sleep!

      --
      We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
    7. Re:Age of Earth 4.5 billion by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      You made a mistake. HA!

    8. Re:Age of Earth 4.5 billion by Dutch+Gun · · Score: 1

      I've never understood the support for panspermia as an origin of life theory. Or rather, I don't understand the continued enthusiasm given how much we've learned in the past few decades about pre-biotic chemistry - other than perhaps the exotic notion that we're evolved from alien life. There is nothing magical about the chemistry found in our biological makeup. All the building blocks are here, and scientists are already fabricating self-replicating, highly organized biological molecules in lab conditions that could easily be precursors to organic life. Occam's Razor seems to lead to a more mundane conclusion: that given appropriate conditions, simple organic life springs into existence fairly easily and quickly (in cosmic timescales at least).

      I'd argue that the fast formation of life supports local bio-genesis much more strongly than seeding from elsewhere. After all, seeding would tend to happen at some random time in a planet's history, because it has nothing to do with local star system conditions. A seeding event that occurs immediately after local conditions are favorable to life seems incredibly improbable to me.

      To help visualize, look at the life timeline on Earth. Almost as soon as there's liquid water, life springs up. Keep in mind that Earth still has another couple billion years left in it's predicted lifespan.

      https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/...

         

      --
      Irony: Agile development has too much intertia to be abandoned now.
    9. Re:Age of Earth 4.5 billion by gweihir · · Score: 1

      You misinterpret the state of the art in Science by jumping to invalid conclusions.

      Nobody has yet created anything comparable to living matter. Chemical self-replication is meaningless. Hence it is still unclear whether life can actually be created from non-living matter in an evolutionary process. Panspermia is one possible explanation, although it has the same problem, just once removed.

      --
      Most ACs are not even worth the keystrokes to insult them. Be generically insulted by this and ignored otherwise.
    10. Re:Age of Earth 4.5 billion by religionofpeas · · Score: 1

      Panspermia doesn't solve the question anyway. It merely moves it to a different place.

    11. Re:Age of Earth 4.5 billion by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      That means it only took life 1 billion years to evolve (shorter if you consider the early earth was inhospitable). That means it is really easy for life to evolve or strong support for pan-spermia ;that life was seeded from outside the solar system.

      Then for three billion years, it pretty much didn't do shit. It just sat there in little green blobs.

    12. Re:Age of Earth 4.5 billion by Opportunist · · Score: 4, Interesting

      Chemical self-replication IS basically what life is. If the "building blocks" are available, self replicating molecules will do just that. At what point you call that "life" is debatable, but in the end, this is what life does. Replicate itself from available resources.

      You will not observe this again. At least not on this planet. We have an oxidizing atmosphere that pretty much destroys anything that could remotely form like this. There is a reason why the great oxygenation event nearly killed life off. Plus, we don't have a few million years that we could possibly wait.

      Personally, I'm more inclined to think that life can and does simply happen when the conditions are right. But, hey, it could just as well be that an interstellar probe from some alien civilization (crash-) landed on our planet those 4.something billion years ago and one of the mechanics assembling it sneezed on it before launching it.

      --
      We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
    13. Re:Age of Earth 4.5 billion by Opportunist · · Score: 2

      Actually, it did a lot. Survived the late heavy bombardment, developed a few ways to synthesize ATP, invented the nucleus which led to the development of eukaryotes, they developed flagella and carnivore behaviour, viruses came into existence, and my personal favorite, they came up with sexual reproduction.

      And you now waste all that with a flick of your hand...

      --
      We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
    14. Re:Age of Earth 4.5 billion by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Maybe "seeding" is a common thing than we think with our limited experience outside of this planet's atmosphere.

      If I hand you a glass of water from the sea would you take it to mean that the existence of whales is highly improbable?

    15. Re:Age of Earth 4.5 billion by quonset · · Score: 1

      Hence it is still unclear whether life can actually be created from non-living matter in an evolutionary process.

      Except for every single baby, human or otherwise, which is born everyday, right? Unless you think sperm or an egg is living matter.

    16. Re:Age of Earth 4.5 billion by cold+fjord · · Score: 1

      Is it turtles^H^H^H^H^H^H^H alien probes all the way down?

      --
      much of left-wing thought is a kind of playing with fire by people who don't even know that fire is hot - George Orwell
    17. Re:Age of Earth 4.5 billion by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      > Keep in mind that Earth still has another couple billion years left in it's predicted lifespan.

      Unless we somehow intercede, the Sun will be bright enough in 500 million years to boil off all of the surface water of the Earth.

      Life as we currently experience it on the surface of the Earth will not exist. (Subterranean life will probably remain.)

    18. Re:Age of Earth 4.5 billion by religionofpeas · · Score: 1

      Unless you think sperm or an egg is living matter.

      It almost is. And the small part that's missing was removed on purpose. It's like removing a brick from a house, and then saying that you can build a house by putting the brick back.

    19. Re:Age of Earth 4.5 billion by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      That means it only took life 1 billion years to evolve (shorter if you consider the early earth was inhospitable). That means it is really easy for life to evolve or strong support for pan-spermia ;that life was seeded from outside the solar system.

      Life is obviously a universal physical phenomenon [cannot be other than that]. If the conditions are in place, life will arise.

    20. Re:Age of Earth 4.5 billion by Maritz · · Score: 1

      Agree. Limited panspermia e.g. Earth exchanging rocks with Mars, sure. I bet some Earth biota made it to Mars. Might even still be there.

      But interstellar/intergalactic panspermia? Doubt it very much. And doubt very much that it's required as an explanation for life's origin.

      --
      I do not want your cheap brainburning drugs. They are useless for work. And I am a working man today.
    21. Re: Age of Earth 4.5 billion by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      "Hence it is still unclear whether life can actually be created from non-living matter in an evolutionary process. "
      What the heck do you think living matter is made from?

    22. Re:Age of Earth 4.5 billion by mark-t · · Score: 1

      Just because it happened so quickly doesn't mean it was easy, or necessarily likely.

      A person can, after all, win a lottery the very first time they play. When we have such a small data set to work with, we are not in any kind of position to know how likely or unlikely life actually is.

    23. Re:Age of Earth 4.5 billion by Opportunist · · Score: 1

      Yes, no, maybe, anything is basically speculation right now. I don't know if there's any way to test for something like this and without, trying to even formulate a hypothesis is moot.

      But I'm neither geophysicist nor microbiologist. Maybe someone does know a way to at least determine what is and what is not possible.

      --
      We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
    24. Re:Age of Earth 4.5 billion by mark-t · · Score: 1

      Kind of like Intelligent Design, or even the Simulation theory.

    25. Re:Age of Earth 4.5 billion by Ol+Olsoc · · Score: 1

      Actually, it did a lot. Survived the late heavy bombardment, developed a few ways to synthesize ATP, invented the nucleus which led to the development of eukaryotes, they developed flagella and carnivore behaviour, viruses came into existence, and my personal favorite, they came up with sexual reproduction.

      And you now waste all that with a flick of your hand...

      It s quite possible that life originated here on earth more than once, and of course there is the possibility that it came form Mars. Regardless, the study of life on earth is incredibly fascinating. So much simply fits together with the physics. Although I'm not an expert, I've done a lot of personal research, and the pieces are fitting pretty nicely.

      Sure beats the concept of Kangaroos swimming from Australia to the middle east so they wouldn't drown in a flood.

      --
      The shepherds did so well protecting the flock that the sheep no longer believed that wolves existed.
    26. Re:Age of Earth 4.5 billion by gweihir · · Score: 1

      Chemical self-replication IS basically what life is. If the "building blocks" are available, self replicating molecules will do just that. At what point you call that "life" is debatable, but in the end, this is what life does. Replicate itself from available resources.

      And fail. Your invalid generalization results in an invalid conclusion. You probably also think that icicles forming (which is basically a physical self-replication) is "life". Incidentally, do you think self-replicating computer malware is "life"?

      --
      Most ACs are not even worth the keystrokes to insult them. Be generically insulted by this and ignored otherwise.
    27. Re:Age of Earth 4.5 billion by gweihir · · Score: 1

      You will seriously argue that sperm and eggs are non-living? Do you also think the earth is flat?

      --
      Most ACs are not even worth the keystrokes to insult them. Be generically insulted by this and ignored otherwise.
    28. Re:Age of Earth 4.5 billion by drinkypoo · · Score: 1

      I've never understood the support for panspermia as an origin of life theory.

      People want to believe that their folks will show up and get them off of this rock

      --
      "You're right," Fisheye says. "I should have set it on 'whip' or 'chop.'"
    29. Re:Age of Earth 4.5 billion by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Life is more than self-replication. It also (per definition) requires the possibility of mutation, among other things.

      The excellent book Seven Clues to the Origin of Life, by A. G. Cairns-Smith (it's a short, easy read) gives both a good definition of life and, as the title suggests, some evidence as to how it originated. (No absolute answers, it's not that presumptive. But it may, actually, start with clay.)

      But there are self-replicating molecules that can mutate.

    30. Re:Age of Earth 4.5 billion by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Never admit your mistakes, unless called upon. -- From the Guide to Vibrant Internet Conversations, vol I.

    31. Re:Age of Earth 4.5 billion by Opportunist · · Score: 1

      There is of course more to "life" than just reproduction. A metabolism for example. The definition is not easy and I am fairly sure that the transition from "dead matter" to "living matter" is quite fluid without a hard cut you could point to and say "that's it" without some arbitrary definition.

      And no, icicles are not self replicating. Water changing its aggregate state has nothing to do with self-replication. If you talked about crystals forming, you'd actually be closer to it, still no cigar, though. What's missing is the rearranging of molecules along with redox-reactions to form new molecules out of them. Basically what we consider a metabolism. What a growing crystal does is basically ordering already pre-existing molecules.

      But, again, I am fairly sure that it is anything but easy to pinpoint exactly at what point we're only dealing with some curious chemical reactions and at what point we're actually dealing with "life". I'd guess the moment you can speak of life with some certainty is when carbon fixation becomes possible for an "organism" (I'll use the term loosely here).

      --
      We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
    32. Re:Age of Earth 4.5 billion by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      ...my personal favorite, they came up with sexual reproduction.

      Because there's no viable scientific model at all of how this most un-Occam thing ever happened spontaneously?

      Ah, Opportunist. I'm guessing that's not why.

    33. Re:Age of Earth 4.5 billion by Camel+Pilot · · Score: 1

      Yep... there has to be a brute fact some where along the line. And that is the mystery. However, insisting that there is an eternal all powerful, all knowing, all beneficial (whatever that means) Necessary Being is the most absurd.

    34. Re: Age of Earth 4.5 billion by Brockmire · · Score: 1

      Well, first, one microorganism took one of their own ribs and made a female companion... then realized their parts differed in an almost opposite way and the rest is history.

    35. Re:Age of Earth 4.5 billion by hawkfish · · Score: 1

      alien probes all the way down?

      And now I can't scrub that image out of my brain...

      --
      You will not drink with us, but you would taste our steel? - Walter Matthau, The Pirates
    36. Re:Age of Earth 4.5 billion by Opportunist · · Score: 1

      Once you have solved the Kangaroo problem, try solving it for Eucalyptus trees.

      You know, the whole flood story would gain a lot of credibility if they claimed it was a local event and that god simply created everything else later. I mean, think about it, the whole book takes place in that rather small area between Egypt and Babylon, no mention of any part of Europe or even the Americas... One could get the impression, whoever wrote it never went past Egypt and Babylon...

      --
      We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
    37. Re:Age of Earth 4.5 billion by Opportunist · · Score: 1

      It most likely happened similar to what we can still observe today in some single celled organisms, where asexual reproduction is complemented by lateral gene transfer between individuals. While asexual cloning sure is advantageous in situations where the environmental situation does not change because it certainly is a faster way to multiply a population, a mechanism that allows the recombination of genetic traits has advantages if adaptation is required.

      The precursor to "true" sexual reproduction was most likely aforementioned lateral gene transfer, where cells would increase their survival chances by basically throwing what everyone has on the table and seeing what works best in the given environment. Mostly by try and error, with those that were "lucky" to collect the right traits flourished while those that didn't perished, but in the end the population survived.

      For a reason why sexual reproduction is beneficial to a species and its evolution, you might want to consult the relevant Wikipedia article, it's actually pretty well written.

      --
      We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
    38. Re:Age of Earth 4.5 billion by Ol+Olsoc · · Score: 1

      You know, the whole flood story would gain a lot of credibility if they claimed it was a local event and that god simply created everything else later. I mean, think about it, the whole book takes place in that rather small area between Egypt and Babylon, no mention of any part of Europe or even the Americas... One could get the impression, whoever wrote it never went past Egypt and Babylon...

      There is some evidence that there was a cataclysmic breach in the strait of Gibraltar that allowed the Atlantic ocean to rather rapidly fill the Mediterranean, sea area. Some settlements have been found that are now under water. A theory called the Zanclean Fllood https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/... proposes a rather quick re-filling of the sea, perhaps in as short a time as a few months. This happened, the only controversy is the length of time it took to refill the sea. must admit that a few months would have been about as scary an event as they get.

      And doesn't "Parting the Red Sea" sound like what happens during a tsunami? Stories get re-told a few thousand times, and there ya go.

      --
      The shepherds did so well protecting the flock that the sheep no longer believed that wolves existed.
    39. Re:Age of Earth 4.5 billion by Opportunist · · Score: 1

      IIRC it was the Bosporus that budged, not Gibraltar, but the effect certainly would have been the same for anyone living there. The general area between Sinai and Babylon is filled with stories about devastating floods, the Gilgamesh epos for example (which is not only older than any biblical report about a flood but its parts about the flood are also most likely already a copy of an older Babylonian flood and creation myth) and a few Akkadian texts that tell pretty much the same story... most of them sane enough, though, to talk about a great flood that sure was devastating and killed "the people" but not a world wide event.

      --
      We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
    40. Re:Age of Earth 4.5 billion by Ol+Olsoc · · Score: 1

      IIRC it was the Bosporus that budged, not Gibraltar, but the effect certainly would have been the same for anyone living there. The general area between Sinai and Babylon is filled with stories about devastating floods, the Gilgamesh epos for example (which is not only older than any biblical report about a flood but its parts about the flood are also most likely already a copy of an older Babylonian flood and creation myth) and a few Akkadian texts that tell pretty much the same story... most of them sane enough, though, to talk about a great flood that sure was devastating and killed "the people" but not a world wide event.

      I've always suspected that the Desert God's versio of the flooding was largely based on the oral traditions, and how good storytellers can amp up a story and create great entertainment. The Desert God's flood is an awesome story from the point of people who don't have knowledge of a world larger than what they see, but simple back of the envelope calculations show the amount of water needed to fully cover the entire globe is simply mind boggling and needed to come from somewher and go somewhere and itwould have killed everything in the oceans, first as salt water mixed with fresh, killing the fressh water species, then as the water became increasingly fresh, killed the salt water species. So a story that was mostly accepted as allegory until the early 20th century, became a fundamentalist demand for literal accuracy.

      --
      The shepherds did so well protecting the flock that the sheep no longer believed that wolves existed.
    41. Re:Age of Earth 4.5 billion by Opportunist · · Score: 1

      The fun part is that a bible thumping con arti... I mean, entrepreneur, Ken Ham, actually proved the whole ark myth impossible: By building one. I'll spare you the financial details, but it's a fun story by itself, and supporting well my theory that religion is the only scam the government stays out of.

      Well, said Ark has the (more or less) accurate proportions of what the bible says the ark should be like. It took 1000 people 2 years to build it. Considering a construction cost of the alleged 100 millions, and modestly assuming that the average worker will cost you 50,000 a year (which is already a bargain, but I doubt that Ken's handing out too much money if he doesn't really have to), we're looking at roughly 2,000 man-years of labour. In a country with perfect infrastructure where you have easy and cheap access to resources, where you can buy pre-fab construction materials and use the aid of power tools and cranes, where you can rely on delivery trucks to haul your lumber, where you can purchase nails without having to make them yourself, where you can easily buy fresh and healthy food, not wasting any time on growing, harvesting or hunting it...

      Few people might know this, but back in the "good old biblical times", people spent most of their time trying to ensure that there is actually enough food available to continue. They didn't work 12 hours a day on such a project because they could just go to the next Burger King and stuff their face.

      So we're looking at 2,000 man-years of labour, using huge trucks and cranes (want to calculate the man-hours in a gallon of gasoline? It ain't pretty...), power tools and drills (or how about the amount of man-hours in a KWh of electricity?)...

      So, no, it is NOT possible that Noah and his 3 sons would build such a ship in a few decades. I know, according to the bible, Noah lived to the ripe age of 600something years, but even Methusalah would not have reached an age high enough to see this Ark's completion.

      --
      We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
    42. Re:Age of Earth 4.5 billion by tehcyder · · Score: 1

      You made a mistake. HA!

      That's never happened on the internet before!

      --
      To have a right to do a thing is not at all the same as to be right in doing it
  7. Re:One for those species who could not adapt by Opportunist · · Score: 4, Funny

    The biggest joke here is that most of those you claim "adapted" don't even think evolution is real and instead prefer to believe that their imaginary friend poofed everything into existence with magic.

    --
    We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
  8. Re:Did you not get the memo? by Opportunist · · Score: 1

    You're off by about a factor of a million, but otherwise surprisingly accurate.

    --
    We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
  9. Evolution != "Progress" by mha · · Score: 1

    Evolution is about adaptation to a changing environment.

    "Progress" has no part in any of it - what does that word even mean? That word implies a goal (how else can you make progress if not towards some goal).

    1. Re:Evolution != "Progress" by sheramil · · Score: 0

      Evolution is about adaptation to a changing environment.

      "Progress" has no part in any of it - what does that word even mean? That word implies a goal (how else can you make progress if not towards some goal).

      for living things in a universe full of dead things, it means putting as much distance between the former and the latter as possible, using any means available. intelligence is a good one - you may have heard of it.

    2. Re:Evolution != "Progress" by religionofpeas · · Score: 2

      Most life on Earth isn't intelligent. Actually, most life doesn't even have nerve cells.

    3. Re: Evolution != "Progress" by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Most life on earth doesn't have a penis, but you can pry mine out of my cold, dead hands.

    4. Re: Evolution != "Progress" by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      The goal is to continue to reproduce. Organisms that lose sight of this goal cease to exist.

    5. Re: Evolution != "Progress" by slashrio · · Score: 2

      There is no goal, there simply is elimination if you don't reproduce.
      That's all evolution is about, it has no goal.

      --
      "Trump!!", the new Godwin.
    6. Re:Evolution != "Progress" by slashrio · · Score: 1

      Evolution isn't 'about' anything, it just happens while you look at it.

      --
      "Trump!!", the new Godwin.
    7. Re:Evolution != "Progress" by Ol+Olsoc · · Score: 1

      Most life on Earth isn't intelligent. Actually, most life doesn't even have nerve cells.

      I fear that's my fault, having hogged up all of it. People are always telling me I have a lot of nerve.

      --
      The shepherds did so well protecting the flock that the sheep no longer believed that wolves existed.
  10. Re:There real story here is by Opportunist · · Score: 3, Funny

    Should've looked closer, there's a few senators old enough that there's some mold growing on them.

    INTELLIGENT life, on the other hand, ...

    --
    We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
  11. I wonder... by wbr1 · · Score: 3, Interesting
    Could the same procedure be used on Alan Hills 84001?

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/...

    --
    Silence is a state of mime.
  12. Old news by Maury+Markowitz · · Score: 2

    It has been generally accepted that there was life at 3.45Gya since 2013.

    http://apnews.excite.com/article/20131113/DAA1VSC01.html

    1. Re: Old news by Brockmire · · Score: 1

      Haha, it's like finding out Mr.Skin already existed and you've been wasting your time making your own site.

  13. Happy Birth day Life! by sabbede · · Score: 1

    You old bastard.

  14. Final by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    At the end of all your lives, you will not be able to doubt that there is a God and that you will forever be craving water and a cooler climate.

    1. Re:Final by Maritz · · Score: 1

      And it was Zeus all along. Hahaha suckers.

      --
      I do not want your cheap brainburning drugs. They are useless for work. And I am a working man today.
  15. But by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Where they there?

  16. Re:Bump stocks destroyed life 3.5 billion years ag by Maritz · · Score: 0

    Yeah well the guy always posts AC so he's asking for some saddo to come along and impersonate him. On slashdot, that's fucking inevitable.

    --
    I do not want your cheap brainburning drugs. They are useless for work. And I am a working man today.
  17. Re:HTML version of the need to ban bump stocks by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    You aren't APK. But you are an even sadder cunt than him. Imagine that.

  18. Re:One for those species who could not adapt by Maritz · · Score: 1

    The rule of thumb on slashdot appears to be:

    Do I like this?

    If the answer is yes, it is true. It's real.

    If the answer is no, then it is false. It isn't real.

    So the christian ones. Plenty of them. They don't like evolution, so it isn't real. Libertarian types who don't like feeling guilty about flying or running AC all summer - they don't like the idea of climate change. So that's bullshit too.

    --
    I do not want your cheap brainburning drugs. They are useless for work. And I am a working man today.
  19. Re:Mike Flynn Commits SUICIDE by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    He'll be pardoned by his co-conspirator. But HEY LOOK A TRANSSEXUAL TOILET GUYS ooooooooooo GAYS IN THE MILITARY BUILD A WALL HAHAHA

  20. Yes, and he was by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    playing guitar for the Rolling Stones!

  21. Dating by Radioactive half-lives proves nothing. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Since Rock can become molten, but stay it's own substance, the radioactive dataing doesn't prove anything about the age of the fossil, especially since huge assumptions are made on how much of a particular radioactive substance there must've been to begin with. And certainly assumptions are made on how the fossils are formed. Just proving a few ways of how fossils can be formed does not mean that is how all fossils are formed. Radioactive dating is more akin to statistics which are know to be able to be manipulated, than scientific..

  22. Re:One for those species who could not adapt by Opportunist · · Score: 1

    I do think the data points to climate change being real, I still run the AC all Summer. I just don't give a fuck about whether the planet is still hospitable to human life after I'm gone.

    --
    We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
  23. Re:Dating by Radioactive half-lives proves nothing by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Yes, of course, none of those paleobiologists, geologists, biologists and other scientists, with their years of studies, followed by years of experience, could have possibly considered all the possibilities and taken into account the characteristics and possible limitations of their dating techniques.

    Not like some random internet anonymous expert who's so much more experienced and knowledgeable.

    Seriously, you must be very naive to think that your smokescreen of pseudo-scientific bullshit, which in fact only highlights your ignorance, could hide the fact that you're just a clueless creationist retard.

    Reading your post was just like reading the falacious crap of some random flat-earther, for fuck's sake. I bet you voted for Trump, to.

  24. Re:Space is fake. Earth is flat. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Sorry space cadet, there is no solar system.

    Check out the winter sun while you're thinking about that.

  25. Jim... by slashrio · · Score: 1

    It's a being, but not as we know it.

    --
    "Trump!!", the new Godwin.
  26. Re:Dating by Radioactive half-lives proves nothing by slashrio · · Score: 1

    Something tells me that you're a fan of authority...

    --
    "Trump!!", the new Godwin.
  27. Re:Dating by Radioactive half-lives proves nothing by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    And something tells me that you see in me exactly what you want to see. By your tone, you're obviously someone who systematically rejects anything that's even remotely related to authority, regardless if it could be good or bad. And the fact that you saw a link with authority in a post that's completely unrelated to it tells me that, frankly, you must be somehow obsessed with the concept of authority in your daily life.

    See ? I can play armschair psychologist too.

    I agree science must be challenged, but with valid logically sound hypothesis, not pseudo-intellectual bullshit like what the OP posted. As I said, he sounded exactly like one of those flat-earth fucktards.

    Incase you haven't noticed, there's a concerted, delibarate, worldwide war against science. Scientists' integrity is being deliberately attacked, a delibarate gaslighting campain is being run against the scientific method itself. This is more than a war against science, it's a war against civilization itself, against reason, logic, rationality and knowledge over obscurantism, superstition, barbarism and savagery.

    Choose your side.

  28. Plotting a consipiracy by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    After analyzing the microfossils individually, they identified five species, concluding that two were photosynthesizers, two were methane-consuming organisms, and one produced methane.

    So two of them were conspiring to kill the other three. It took them a billion years, but they finally pulled it off.

  29. Confused by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    I don't know which is more stupid - Believing in a supreme being that created absolutely everything or that somehow you can shake a bunch of DNA for billions of years and end up with conciousness. There is a very, very *very* low probability of either happening. At least the "God" theory admits that it is a matter of belief/faith.

    1. Re: Confused by Brockmire · · Score: 1

      Your post is "more stupid."

    2. Re:Confused by mark-t · · Score: 1
      I don't think we are in a position to speak about the probability of either. In all of human history, we have a sample-size set of exactly one instance of a planet that has evolved detectable life... making presumptions about its plausibility or implausibility is simply not possible until we can at least find a second planet to correlate with.

      As for the likelihood of God, it is no more or less implausible than the Simulation Theory.

  30. Re: One for those species who could not adapt by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    You are so awesome and cool. Such a tough guy rebel, or maybe a sociopath?

  31. The"fall" and the Christian religion by Camel+Pilot · · Score: 1

    All of Christian theology hangs on the fall of Eve and Adam and the world with it. Without this literal event nothing about New Testament theology makes any sense. That is why Creationism is very important. Jesus believed in the actual literal Genesis story and built his theology upon it. I personally don't understand how a Christian cannot believe in the literal Adam and Eve story and have a coherent belief .

    (Disclaimer I don't believe it but I understand why they fight)

    1. Re: The"fall" and the Christian religion by Brockmire · · Score: 1

      Everything in the Bible is literal until shown to be false and then it becomes a symbol and not meant literally. I went to a Catholic high school and was told Genesis was just a symbol and nobody believed it was literal. I said, that doesn't sound right, I've seen lots of references that they really believe this to the exact words. I looked up a stat, and in something like in 1950 USA, over 55% of Catholics still believed Genesis was factual, not a symbol. This dropped over the next decades, but they were still peddling this shit in the 20th century with nuns often quoting Genesis as they beat or abused you. Somewhere between ages 5-8, I can recall being in church thinking, "this is more made up than the fairy tales I read going to bed". It still surprises me smart people buy this shit, knowing it's not true, my only way to rationalize it is by assuming they were brainwashed as a child and it's engraved in their brains. In school, when playing that game where you whisper in an ear and pass the secret around until it gets to the end and nowhere resembles the input? Yeah, try that over hundreds of years by people where literacy was less than 4% and most likely were never there. And you're going to take the literal word by someone trying to hype something that they have an interest in? Nope, too much bullshit.

    2. Re: The"fall" and the Christian religion by Camel+Pilot · · Score: 1

      I went to Catholic school and Sunday School in the early 70's... I can confirm I was taught the literal Genisis story.

  32. Re:Dating by Radioactive half-lives proves nothing by Camel+Pilot · · Score: 1

    If you read the paper that is what makes these rock special is that they haven't metamorphosed.

  33. ... and one produced methane by NikeHerc · · Score: 1

    This variant developed into politicians.

    --
    Circle the wagons and fire inward. Entropy increases without bounds.
  34. Re:One for those species who could not adapt by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    And how do you think we got here? Where did the elements and energy in our universe come from? 0 + 0 = 0, that's a mathematical certainty. You start from nothing, you get nothing no matter how much time goes by. So clearly, somewhere somehow, we are dependent on something outside our universe for our existence. Or, as you say, did all that "stuff" just magically "poof" into existence?

    Maybe you should think hard about the origins of life before attempting to mock others for their belief in a supreme being.

  35. Re: One for those species who could not adapt by Brockmire · · Score: 1

    It's fucking hot. I whine and melt above 30*C. Some fuckers live in places hotter than that for for more than just a few days a summer for some dumb fucking reason.

  36. Re: One for those species who could not adapt by Brockmire · · Score: 1

    None of what you said made any sense, so I'll continue to ignore your nonsense, mmmkay?

  37. Re: There real story here is by Brockmire · · Score: 1

    -1? I legit lol.

  38. Re:One for those species who could not adapt by Paul+Fernhout · · Score: 1

    While it is hard to wrap our minds around as creatures of our seemingly orderly cosmos, if there truly is nothing at all, then there are no laws at all (e.g. no conservation of matter and energy, no cause and effect), and so there is nothing to prevent anything from suddenly popping into existence (along with whatever new laws of physics).

    --
    A 21st century issue: the irony of technologies of abundance in the hands of those still thinking in terms of scarcity.
  39. Re:Dating by Radioactive half-lives proves nothing by slashrio · · Score: 1

    Against!

    --
    "Trump!!", the new Godwin.
  40. Re:One for those species who could not adapt by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    That's not entirely true. There are many Christians unopposed to the concept of evolution. It's the origin of the universe and self-consciousness that is contested having come not from "magic", but from a form of life unlike anything we currently know or understand (scientifically speaking) and in a non-corporeal form.

  41. Re:One for those species who could not adapt by tehcyder · · Score: 1

    0 + 0 = 0, that's a mathematical certainty.

    -100+100 = 0 is a mathematical certainty too.

    --
    To have a right to do a thing is not at all the same as to be right in doing it