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Ice Tea Company Rebrands as 'Long Blockchain' and Stock Price Triples (arstechnica.com)

Posted by msmash on from the not-the-onion dept.

The Long Island Ice Tea Corporation is exactly what it sounds like: a company that sells people bottled iced tea and lemonade. But today the company announced a significant change of strategy that would start with changing its name to "Long Blockchain Corporation." From a report: The company was "shifting its primary corporate focus towards the exploration of and investment in opportunities that leverage the benefits of blockchain technology," the company said in a Thursday morning press release. "Emerging blockchain technologies are creating a fundamental paradigm shift across the global marketplace," the company said. The stock market loved the announcement. Trading opened Thursday morning more than 200 percent higher than Wednesday night's closing price. The company isn't getting out of the iced tea business. "The Company will continue to operate Long Island Brand Beverages, LLC as a wholly-owned subsidiary," the company writes in its press release. The new blockchain efforts are only in their "preliminary stages," the press release says, and will likely involve investing or forming partnerships with other companies. One potential partner is providing "blockchain infrastructure for the financial services industry." Another is building a "new smart contract platform for building decentralized applications."

9 of 144 comments (clear)

  1. New investment opportunity by nwaack · · Score: 5, Funny

    Hi all, I'm starting a new company called Super-awesome-blockchain-bitcoin-make-you-money-LLC. I'm still in the "preliminary stages" of setting up said company but it's gonna be awesome. You can send all your money to me at my P.O. Box. ~SMH

    1. Re:New investment opportunity by Jose · · Score: 3, Funny

      I'm at the post office, and they are saying that they need a zip code for PO Box ~SMH.

      please provide the *full* address so we can make the monies!

      --
      The basic sleazeware produced in a drunken fury by a bunch of UCBerkeley grad students was still the core of BIND. --PV
  2. Artificial Intelligence Poetry by PopeRatzo · · Score: 5, Funny

    "Emerging blockchain technologies are creating a fundamental paradigm shift across the global marketplace,"

    The jargon is strong with this one.

    --
    You are welcome on my lawn.
    1. Re:Artificial Intelligence Poetry by FFOMelchior · · Score: 5, Funny

      I don't know. Could use more synergy.

    2. Re:Artificial Intelligence Poetry by PopeRatzo · · Score: 3, Funny

      Also, he left out, "data-driven" and "cloud".

      --
      You are welcome on my lawn.
    3. Re:Artificial Intelligence Poetry by cmdr_klarg · · Score: 4, Funny

      "Emerging blockchain technologies are creating a fundamental paradigm shift across the global marketplace,"

      The jargon is strong with this one.

      BINGO!!!!

      --
      THE SOFTWARE, IT NO WORKY!!!
  3. Blockchain will revolutionize Ice Tea by JoeyRox · · Score: 5, Funny

    A QR code on the container will tell you the source of every tea bag used to create your drink, and also tell you who was tea bagged buying the company's stock.

  4. No big deal, really by demon+driver · · Score: 4, Funny

    After all, it was just a very small transition from 'beverage' to 'leverage'.

  5. Re:Fools and Money. by Bruce+Perens · · Score: 5, Funny

    Because of this obvious opportunity, for the next several months I will be referred to as "Bruce Blockchain Blockchain Blockchain Millionare Billionare Perens"

    --
    Bruce Perens.