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The Physics of Christmas
Well, with Christmas just around the corner, I'd like to thank Joe Mahoney for sending us a review of Can Reindeer Fly - The Science of Christmas, known in the States as The Physics of Christmas: From the Aerodynamics of Reindeer to the
Thermodynamics of Turkey. It's an amusing little piece - and just in time for holiday shopping, I offer this blatant plug: Jon Katz' new book Geeks is ready for pre-order at ThinkGeek. It's really good, even though it's dedicated to two bozos who run this site. *grin*
Can Reindeer Fly - The Science of Christmas
author
Roger Highfield
pages
294
publisher
Metro Books, 11/1998
rating
8/10
reviewer
Joe Mahoney
ISBN
0316366110
summary
A fascinating discussion of the mechanics of Christmas magic
The Scenario Can Reindeer Fly is a book about the
culture, science, technologies and traditions that contribute to the
Christmas season. Dr Highfield is a respected author and scientist who
has written a well researched book that will appeal to a wide variety of
people.
What's Good? If you liked the various 'Science of Star Trek' books and websites, you will probably enjoy this book. Dr Highfield covers almost every area of modern day science - from genetics to quantum theory to dieting to explain or theorize about many of the different aspects of Christmas. Christmas in different cultures is discussed too, with chapters on food and gift giving around the world. I really enjoyed Dr Highfield's approach. Rather than trying to disprove theories and legends, he tries to use every scientific tool available to see if something could be done - this is especially true in a chapter on the virgin birth of Jesus. Unfortunatley, Dr Highfield wasn't able to conclude that Santa Claus employs warp powered reindeer to boot it round the earth on Christmas eve :- What's Bad? This probably isn't an issue for most slashdot readers, but I found there was a definite Northern Hemisphere bias. Several chapters take it for granted that Christmas will be celebrated in the middle of Winter. Where I live, Dec 25 is usually a hot summer day and rather than building a snowman after a huge turky dinner, I am more likely to lie in the sun after a huge BBQ. It's not a big issue and it doesn't really detract from the text in any way.
So What's In It For Me? ThereÕs really something for everyone in 'Can Reindeer Fly'. If you want to know about the origins of the Christmas tree and other traditions there are several chapters to keep you happy. Interested in astronomy? A chapter on the Bethlehem star is what you're after. Science geeks will be interested in chapters on Snow and the tech involved to get a sleigh to travel to the hopes of every good little boy and girl. Dieticians will be interested in the chapter on Santa's diet and genetics.
Purchase this boook at fatbrain.
Table of Contents- Acknowledgements
- Introduction: Christmas and the Scientist
- 1. The Bethlehem Star
- 2. Miracle
- 3. Santa and Those Reindeer
- 4. Gluttony; Santa's Genetics
- 5. The flame and the Tree
- 6. Giving and Shopping
- 7. Snow
- 8. Festive Fare
- 9. Christmas Spirit
- 10. Christmas Blues and Seasonal Moods
- 11. Santa's Science
- 12 Christmas 2020
- Appendix The Formula for Christmas Day
- Glossary
- Bibliography
- Index
Santa actually delivers presents all year round. However, because of very clever marketing, the probability of them being perceived before Dec 25 is so low that their existence remain indeterminate - in Schrodinger terms, the box is not opened.
However, on Dec 25th, everyone expects presents - looks in the box - and the wave collapses.
Meanwhile Santa is selling the idea to Intel as an alternative to clock-locking their CPUs...
This sig left unintentionally blank.
After he'd visted the first house and fired up the TARDIS, it would malfunction and land him on Skaron...
This sig left unintentionally blank.
I (being Jewish) enjoy wishing my (also Jewish) friends Merry Christmas, in a purely ironic sense. Don't get me wrong, I also have actively Christian friends to whom I wish Merry Christmas sincerely, but living in a pseudo-Christian country, I find it amusing to wish other non-Christians Merry Christmas. On the other hand, I actually do *not* agree with non-Christians doing the tree thing (and similar). Although it is well-known that these were adopted from Pagan traditions, they were adopted by *Christianity*, not Judaism or agnosticism (or any other -ism, AFAIK), so there is no reason for non-Christians to follow them.
:-)
:-)
And there's no point wishing someone Happy Chanukah now, since Chanukah finished 10 days ago
Oh, yeah, Merry Christmas everyone!
Paranoia isn't an infectious condition, it's a way of life
Everyone knows this is complete and utter rubbish. Santa uses magic to get around to everyone - science just can't explain this one. Jeeez - don't they teach you anything in high school?
(posting with Mozilla and proud of it).
Matt. Want XML + Apache + Stylesheets? Get AxKit.
Well, I'm an atheist. Not a pagan, not an agnostic -- an atheist. I have a christmas tree in the house because I like shiny things, and it gives me a pleasantly warm feeling. Hell, I like music with sleighbells in it (Roy Wood!).
:)
... but then I'm an atheist brought up in a predominantly protestant (Welsh nonconformist) community, I guess that 'd make a difference.
At least this way I don't get hung-up and invent Mr Hanky
--
If you're such a militant agnostic, you might consider giving your money to a less militantly Christian charity...
OK, I know they do some great work with the homeless, but I'm sure there are other charities that do equally good work but don't lace it with evangelism (and all those horrible military trappings).
--
(Well, at least it's not a Microsoft Production. :)
It's a small world and it smells funny; I'd buy another if it wasn't for the money; Take back what I paid (SoM)
I didn't do the ThinkGeek link, just the review. I did find the FatBrain link for Hemos but didn't put it in the review. I'm just reading all the comments now, it's cool to think there's over 100 posts about something I've written. Joe
my blog: good times, man, good times
On the downside, did Jesse really write this ? That seems a little too Katz-like to be real. And would anyone want to read a whole book of this?
What I'm listening to now on Pandora...
Eric
In fact Santa can do it and you will discover how if you read http://www.cybersurf.co.uk/johnny/sant a.html
Johnny
I'm reading this in the Books section. It provides links to Amazon for purchase of books. There've been enough articles here slamming Amazon's patent practices, and enough negative comments from the /. staff that I find this hypocritical. If this was a case of necessary income, I'd understand. We all have to do things we don't like to make a living, but CmdrTaco's a millionaire now. He doesn't need the few dollars he gets for referral sales from Amazon.
There aren't as many good children as you think. Certainly none in my house.
Rupert (off to buy the white beard colouring anyway)
--
E_NOSIG
I find 'Bah Humbug' is the most appropriate thing to say ... ;->
--
Am I having deja vu...does the plot of Geeks sound amazingly like a Dateline episode I watched once...or maybe Katz ran an article on Slashdot about these guys. Somehow I've heard this story before.
Jazilla.org - the Java Mozilla
It's 10 PM. Do you know if you're un-American?
And by the way...what the heck happened to the sigs? Did Rob remove the HTMLability out of them? My links are all gone.
Jazilla.org - the Java Mozilla
It's 10 PM. Do you know if you're un-American?
Gah, this joke is so old it has hair on it. Yeah, it's hilarious, but does /. need to be turned into another "FW: (fwd): FWD: >>>> JOKES" site?
Yeah, yeah, bah humbug...
You cannot apply a technological solution to a sociological problem. (Edwards' Law)
There's a thing on the Discovery Channel tonight that looks like it could be the same material:
/ 14/22595000.html
http://www.discovery.com/sched/domestic/episode
I'm still trying to figure out what Katz would know about Geeks. His articles on here sure aren't a shining endorsement of his book...
Davis Ray Sickmon, Jr - looking for something to read? Check out my three free novels at MidnightRyder.org
Could be that he is using a Beowolf cluster of 1000's of Santas. After all, he *is* doing basically the same process at each household, and they would all return to the North Pole (the main server) when finished....
free presents from Santa - free snacks for Santa - free as in 'free beer'. Yeah - that's the ticket - Santa is running GNU/Linux!!
Oh, come on. Everybody knows that Santa just forks himself as many times as needed. The gift-delivery process is perfectly parallelizable, so, assuming Santa has decent parallel hardware, he should have no problems at all.
The only issue, of course, is that all these Santas has to be reaped properly afterwards. After all, you don't want hordes of Santa zombies wandering around town...
Kaa
Kaa
Kaa's Law: In any sufficiently large group of people most are idiots.
There is off course the explanation that Santa employs the powers of quantum mechanics. In this case the use of the multiuniverse theory (or the other theory - depending on your point of view) can be used.
;)
By quantum mechanics Santa manages to manifest himself in all states in the same point in time. Santa can employ quantum mechanics based on the uncertainty principle of "Does Santa Claus exist or not?" and "Have I been a good boy/girl/it?".
In this way Santa assumes all states at once. Being in all chimneys, filling all stockings, eatting the mince pie left out for him, etc etc, all at the same single point in time.
Now the really clever part is how does Santa manage to forge every single person's pareints signature.
transcript of Katz interview for his latest artcicle: Creationism in the Hellmouth of Geekdom and Nerdity
Katz: So, you're a teenager in a high school. Is that correct?
Teenager: Yes, that is correct.
Katz: You don't play team sports and are very pimply. You are a geek, is that correct?
Teenager: Well, I've never referred to myself that way, but I guess I see how one would think that.
Katz: Tell me how horrible your life is as a result of being a geeky teenager.
Teenager: Huh?
Katz: You can start off by telling me about the daily beatings you suffer and then move on to the alienation and administration apathy which has your bordering on suicide
Teenager: What are you talking about? I've never been beaten. I'm a Regents Scholar and have a great relationship with my teachers.
Katz: Yes, that must have been horrible
Teenager: Uh, are you listening to me?
Katz: After that horrible incident, how close were you to murdering your schoolmates and/or killing yourself
Teenager: Murder my schoolmates? Why would I do that. I just came back from christmas break vacation with several of them. We had a blast. As far as killing myself, that would never happen. I have a full scholarship to Berkley. My future is great.
Katz: Thank you for giving us an insight into the horrors of being a geeky teenager. Sharing your experiences with the world will help others like you and will help me get a house in the south of France.
Teenager: You need Ritalin, dude.
SANTA CLAUS: An Engineer's Perspective
I. There are approximately two billion children (persons under 18) in the world. However, since Santa does not visit children of Muslim, Hindu, Jewish or Buddhist religions, this reduces the workload for Christmas night to 15% of the total, or 378 million (according to the Population Reference Bureau). At an average (census) rate of 3.5 children per household, that comes to 108 million homes, presuming that there is at least one good child in each.
II. Santa has about 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming he travels east to west (which seems logical). This works out to 967.7 visits per second. This is to say that for each Christian household with a good child, Santa has around 1/1000 of a second to park the sleigh, hop out, jump down the chimney, fill the stockings, distribute the remaining presents under the tree, eat whatever snacks have been left for him, get back up the chimney, jump into the sleigh and get on to the next house. Assuming that each of these 108 million stops is evenly distributed around the earth (which, of course, we know to be false, but will accept for the purposes of our calculations), we are now talking about 0.78 miles per household; a total trip of 75.5 million miles, not counting bathroom
stops or breaks. This means Santa's sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second -- 3,000 times the speed of sound. For purposes of comparison, the fastest man-made vehicle, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a poky 27.4 miles
per second, and a conventional reindeer can run (at best) 15 miles per hour.
III. The payload of the sleigh adds another interesting element. Assuming that each child gets nothing more than a medium sized Lego set (two pounds), the sleigh is carrying over 500 thousand tons, not counting Santa himself. On land, a conventional reindeer can pull no more than 300 pounds. Even granting that the "flying" reindeer could pull ten times the normal amount, the job can't be done with eight or even nine of them-Santa would need 360,000 of them. This increases the payload, not counting the weight of the sleigh, another 54,000 tons, or roughly seven times the weight of the Queen Elizabeth (the ship, not the monarch).
IV. 600,000 tons traveling at 650 miles per second crates enormous air resistance-this would heat up the reindeer in the same fashion as a spacecraft reentering the earth's atmosphere. The lead pair of reindeer would absorb 14.3 quintillion joules of energy per second each. In short, they would burst into flames almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them and creating deafening sonic booms in their wake. The entire reindeer team would be vaporized within 4.26 thousandths of a second, or right about the time Santa reached the fifth house on his trip. Not that it matters, however, since Santa, as a result of accelerating from a dead stop to 650 m.p.s. in 0.001 seconds, would be subjected to centrifugal forces of 17,500 g's. A 250 pound Santa (which seems ludicrously slim) would be pinned to the back of the sleigh by 4,315,015 pounds of force, instantly crushing his bones and organs and reducing him to a quivering blob of pink goo.
V. Therefore, if Santa did exist, he's dead now.