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User: loraksus

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Comments · 2,248

  1. Re:The real reason why. on Microsoft Postpones Office XP Subscriptions · · Score: 1
    I am no longer the richest man in the world. What should we do?
    If I may provide a little Slashback -- the Sunday Times report that Gates has dropped to second place was completely inaccurate. It ascribed all of Sam Walton's inheritance to one son instead of splitting it across his four kids and widow. (Details here)

    well. ok.. It's not like the story was based on factual info anyways.


    I have a shotgun, a shovel and 30 acres behind the barn.

  2. The real reason why. on Microsoft Postpones Office XP Subscriptions · · Score: 5
    This does eventually get to the XP thing, read on.

    I'm bored. Slightly drunk. At home, on a saturday night. Alone. No, I'm not bitter. No. This is not part of the story. Enjoy.

    Dark room: Scrawny man with a Microsoft T-shirt sits by a roaring fire, holding a white cat. His name-tag - emblazoned in gold, reads "Bill". Several disemboweled penguins hang from the wall, dripping entrails and blood.

    A old bald man enters.
    "Mr. Gates, you wished to see me?"
    "My CEO, ah, yes. Come in Mr. Ballmer" The scrawny man responds. Stroking the white cat, he continues.
    " The United States Department of Justice has damaged our financial situation. I am no longer the richest man in the world. What should we do? We can not allow such treachery to go without punishment!"

    "Sir, we could use this opportunity to unveil our secret weapon!"
    "You're not talking about . . ."
    " Yes, I am"
    The room goes deathly quiet, even the squealing penguins in the cages fall silent.

    "Very well then - Send in . . ."
    Dramatic pause, lightning flashes, thunder, well, thunders.
    " The ACCOUNTANT!"
    More thunder, we catch a glimpse of a worker with an arc welder, picking up a large thin piece of metal off the floor.
    A scrawnier person enters. He looks very ferrety, almost identical looking to Mr. Gates. He wears an armband of a flying window. In other circumstances, he would be called "mini me". This however, is not Austin Powers, nor even a multi-million dollar movie. It is a slashdot post.
    " Greetings from the boiler room Chief Software Architect, Sir." He goosesteps in, legs seemingly without joints.
    Penguins squeal in terror, off to the side, we see a small daemon, begin to cry. The white cat darts off to the corner.
    Varick salutes - "Heil Microsoft!"
    Gates nods approvingly, "So Mr. Varick, what have you come up with this time?"
    "Sir," Varick plugs a laptop into a projector - "World Domination" is projected on the wall.
    In a high pitched voice, he continues, " By not hiring millions of recently un-employed tech workers to answer phones and "authorize" versions of XP, Microsoft can, single-handedly, doom the United States Of America to a several long years of recession."
    Balmer nods, " Ultimately their weak government will fall to hordes of angry citizens - and the politicians will die slow, painful, brutal deaths! Utter chaos will result! Cities without leaders!"
    The slide shows a burning city, with politicians hanging from lamp posts.
    Varick switches slides and squeals "And we shall be the beacon of hope and stability! We will swoop in and save the people from their own madness!"
    Maniacal laughter rebounds in the room.
    Gates stands up, lifts up both arms and bellows "One World, one Web, one Program!" The screaming of the penguins crescendo's, as Gates' cat tears into them, seemingly insane - feathers fly through the air and blood splatters all over Varick - "Ein Volk, ein Reich, ein Betriebssystem" - he screams (One people, one realm, One operating system according to the fish), the daemon falls next - torn in half.
    " We shall rule the world!" Ballmer yells " We shall be Gods!"

    Several minutes later, the frenzy stops, leaving only the fire, pools of blood, the three men and a bloody cat.
    "Fuck with Microsoft will they?" Gates asks in a hushed voice. "Fuck with Microsoft?"


    I have a shotgun, a shovel and 30 acres behind the barn.

  3. Perhaps on Microsoft Postpones Office XP Subscriptions · · Score: 1
    They realized that any money they saved due to the stopping of piracy would equal the cost of hiring several hundred people, building an office, sitting them on a 1-800-line, and having them work 24-7.

    Or maybe someone just posted the OEM, no-registration required versions on the net, freenet, several hotline servers, wrapster, limewire, bearshare et al.. sites and MS decided to say "fuckit."

    It is nice to know MS saw the light.

    I have a shotgun, a shovel and 30 acres behind the barn.

  4. I'm sorry. on Digital Display Encryption Details Leaked · · Score: 1
    Am I the only one wondering this.
    Who gives a bucket of shit about a secure video path when I have deCSS? Which will take something, rape the encryption on it and then send it along the secure video/audio path . . .

    Maybe I'm missing something . . .

    There is not ONE a/v format where the encryption has not been broken on it, nor do I believe that there will be one in the future.

    It seems that this is a giant waste of time on the hardware manufacturer's part. Quite honestly, this sounds like a government sponsored project, $70 hammers and the whole bit.

    As for;
    Your monitor will soon be a "licensed monitor device".

    I have a feeling that my driver in device manager will look something like this.
    " @1m05T m1cr0$0ft h@x0r3d dR1viR " if there is a need for it.

    yeah, speaking of bucket of shit, have you seen the Aztec?

    I have a shotgun, a shovel and 30 acres behind the barn.

  5. Re:Declaration of Consumer Copying Rights (DCCR) on Digital Display Encryption Details Leaked · · Score: 1
    additions...
    - Bribes to the politicians that are bigger than the "campaign contributions" that the MPAA gives.

    - free hookers, food, opera tickets, et cetra for the former, in greater quantity than what the latter gives.

    - free bullets for any member of the MPAA who wishes to challenge the "new consumer policy"

    Please note this refers to bullets, not shells or casings, nor ammunition, just bullets.

    I'm sorry if this post kinda knocks your post's credibility down a bit. It is kinda vulgar, but it is in the real world. I don't see politicians giving up their comfortable life style anytime soon.

    You have a great idea, all we need is a bloody coup, mass executions / imprisonments / public floggings to make it work. Or maybe a bit of finance reform.

    I have a shotgun, a shovel and 30 acres behind the barn.

  6. Ok.. on Digital Display Encryption Details Leaked · · Score: 1
    I just got a ATI Radeon
    64mb DDR, etc, etc.

    Games look fucking awesome on this - and it isn't being used to its full capability. I can run Q3 at damn near 100 FPS at 1024x768. needless to say, my kills have increased dramatically. Bow down before me, for I am God.

    I'm not going to give up my 19" monitor and Ati Radeon sometime soon. NOTHING on the market today requires anything near the level of the Radeon, nor is much planned.

    I'd say that I can be using this for at least another 3-4 years if I don't get the "upgrade bug". We have kind of reached a slowdown in the video dept - why? because nobody will buy your game if only 3 video cards, each costing about $200, support it - we won't even mention the fact that none of the compaq / dell "consumer computers" support the game.

    You eliminate your market, you lose money. It's as simple as that.

    Backwards compatibility will always be paramount to any "copy protection of video" - and unless something super fantastic comes along, and I honestly don't see it (maybe real time 3d rendering in games that actually looks real, as opposed to the Black and white people)

    That said, I wouldn't mind one of those super big mac LCD screens, you know, the $4000 ones. Unfortunately, money is kind of tight - shit I can buy a CAR for that amount.

    I have a shotgun, a shovel and 30 acres behind the barn.

  7. Re:All right on DVD Watermarking On Its Way · · Score: 1
    My god. I'm talking about bastards who knowingly kill people, and engage in targeted marketing towards children, and he decides to justify some slashdot user intervention thing.

    Bah ;)

    Yes, I think it (dvd bullshit) sucks, but at some point, the moves of the fat cat bastards are easily countered by what the consumers do to circumvent the protections - especially when it is so easy. You can go to many sites which offer many programs that will rip a dvd for you, encode it with divx or ? and even calculate the exact bitrate so that it just fits on a 700 mb CD.

    Insert DVD into DVD drive, Insert Empty CDR into CDR drive. Press "Start", go do something for a few hours.

    Literally, these programs are that easy to use.

    Or you can buy a DVD-Ram disk and burn it to that if you want an exact copy and want to spend $10. There's your backup, unfortunately it isn't really cost effective just yet.

    These programs are free, and easily accesible. The hardware isn't illegal either, just costs a few $.

    Is this illegal software? Not in Canada / the rest of the world, unfortunately, these americans are kinda weird, you know what I mean. They did elect dubya. Though australia's leadership decided to jump into bed with the corporate gurus. Every politician is a whore, they just set their prices differently.

    Anyways, you can buy a player in Britian that plays US DVD's and vice versa, you can even get region free players, or DVD drives for your laptop/desktop with the same thing.
    Shit, I got a player in Ukraine this summer that had a slot for a DVD, a CDR, and a video tape - cost about $70. Works like a charm on 220v. I shoulda brought it down, damn ups I got would of have run it perfectly. Hindsight is 20/20.

    Though $70 in ukraine is very good justification for a murder robbery, you probably wouldn't want to flash $20 without some close family around. That place is kinda scary in some parts.

    Everybody gasps in amazement that CSS was cracked. It isn't that big of a deal. By implementing it, the companies got 95%+ of people to not copy their stuff, yes, there's some bullshit on the side, but these are the same people who wanted to outlaw VCR's, you have to expect this kind of shit from them. They are assholes, and are stupid too boot - unfortunately americans will buy almost anything - well 95% of them anyways.

    Ah, a side point - I'd have to say people taping movies during the free HBO weekends are a greater source of piracy than DVD rips. but Jack the mobster turned exec Valentino doesn't live in the real world.

    And VCD's are going to be around for quite some time - even laserdiscs are still around, and those pretty much flopped in all markets. Its not like the chinese govt (or some sections of it) will stop producing something that gets them money and pisses off the capatalists at the same time.

    Its a small wonder that castro hasn't realized that yet. . .

    Gnight. It must really suck living in Florida, horrible weather I hear ;)

    I have a shotgun, a shovel and 30 acres behind the barn.

  8. Wouldn't it be ironic on DVD Watermarking On Its Way · · Score: 3
    If the bootleg DVD's from China actually looked better than the American Official Release (TM) (C) et al, because they didn't have the watermarking?

    Just whoring for some karma, but it does pose an interesting question.

    I have a shotgun, a shovel and 30 acres behind the barn.

  9. Re:Inconceivable! on DVD Watermarking On Its Way · · Score: 1
    I'm afraid that implementing even a bullshit encryption scheme, or in this case, another one, will actually cause the share holders to give the companies a big hug, and increase share prices for a little while. You have to remember that the people who run these companies have difficulty sending email, and the the share holders have difficulty accessing anything besides their AOL email accounts.

    Of course, those people are too busy driving porsches and "doing the horizontal mambo" with hot babes.

    Wait a second...


    I have a shotgun, a shovel and 30 acres behind the barn.

  10. Re:Wasn't CSS supposed to ..... on DVD Watermarking On Its Way · · Score: 2
    Yeah, but 90% of americans are sheep and will buy into whatever is sold to them - as long as it is somewhat entertaining.

    Besides, the comparison between cell phones and DVD's is not exactly fair.
    The former is trying to convince a consumer that he or she needs a product that is vastly different from what they used to have.

    Also comparing a one time purchase (DVD) to something that you pay a monthly, significantly bloated fee for (cell phone) is unfair because the cost of the phone (to Voicestream / Verizon / Bell Atlantic, not to you, true wholesale and retail is a large difference ) is made up by the consumer in a short time - especially if they call long distance.

    The difference between a DVD and a tape is not that great, essentially same shit, different pile - but with dolby 5.1 and subtitles.

    And DVD does have a standard. The legal mumbo jumbo isn't really that great.
    The conspiracy by manufacturers to prevent consumers from excercise their fair use rights is the problem. Therein lies the screwjob.

    People don't give a shit about standards, as long as you can plug it in, insert the disc (?disk?)and press play, and have an image come up, that is all that matters to 90% of the consumer market.


    I have a shotgun, a shovel and 30 acres behind the barn.

  11. All right on DVD Watermarking On Its Way · · Score: 1
    It's been cracked, it will be cracked in the future.

    I'm all for free movies and stuff, but what the fuck is this indignance against companies that want to protect their stuff? I know that they are fat cat billionaire bitches, but they did fund the work.

    Yeah, the writers got fucked, the girls with the nice tits and guys with nice asses got the dough.

    I digress.

    And these people who complain about quality degredation - please don't forget that you will be most likely watching this shit on a standard TV (that has a whole 500 lines of vertical resolution)!

    Whatever.

    Can we do something a little more productive?

    Like killing some fucking cigarette company execs.

    I have a shotgun, a shovel and 30 acres behind the barn.

  12. yeah? on How Many Hours Do You Work in a Week? · · Score: 1
    fuck you.. its 6.5

    I have a shotgun, a shovel and 30 acres behind the barn.

  13. Re:Schadenfreude on Coder on the Cross · · Score: 1
    Sadism? Sadistic Pleasure?

    I'd say that the former covers it more than anything else.

    After all, you are drawing amusement from other people's pain (problems).

    I have a shotgun, a shovel and 30 acres behind the barn.

  14. Really? on Tech Support: Sucking Even More · · Score: 1
    grads from universities?
    I'd say thats way over the qualification of most people working at
    i.e. stream hires people off the street - no qualifications needed.
    I know that dell doesn't require a university degree either.

    But I suppose that you are right in small to midsize companies - I have no personal experience there

    I have a shotgun, a shovel and 30 acres behind the barn.

  15. Dunno, on Ring-Tone Royalties · · Score: 1
    but this seems to affirm my belief that the economy is going to the shitter faster than people leaving the theater during existenz.

    I mean, if you have bad expectations for the future, why not screw consumers now, after all, they will forget about it

    Though I'm not sure that this wouldn't be a bad idea - what the fuck is wrong with a phone going ring, ring?


    I have a shotgun, a shovel and 30 acres behind the barn.

  16. Re:I have a cable modem, but would sell my soul� on MSN Buys 500,000 Qwest.Net Customers · · Score: 1
    Stay with the cable. DSL's been a bitch for me.

    You want a "static" ip? get a updated hostname.

    www.d2g.com

    Wonderful service. They got an excellent windows client (tho you might not be interested in that). Much better than a lot of the other services out there.
    Free too.

    I have a shotgun, a shovel and 30 acres behind the barn.

  17. Anti-mac jabs on Slashback: Toast, Cube, Light · · Score: 1
    My next project is to . . . build a Macintosh computer into a toaster, one small difference, the heating coils would stay in and on full power.

    The all new Fry mac.


    I have a shotgun, a shovel and 30 acres behind the barn.

  18. One thing to do on Using Webcams as Remote Security? · · Score: 1
    Buy a dog, a nice angry one. Feed it only bloody raw meat.

    Get a junkyard dog if you can...

    That'll cut down on the crime.
    Probably cheaper than a web cam.

    I have a shotgun, a shovel and 30 acres behind the barn.

  19. I'm taking Java on Learn The Language Of Math · · Score: 1
    What I need is OOP from the basics..

    Bah.

    I have a shotgun, a shovel and 30 acres behind the barn.

  20. Perhaps its just me. on User-friendly Freenet · · Score: 1
    But does anybody else feel that it is ironic that the thing that is touted "True Freedom of Expression" is based in Russia??

    Damn, have times changed.


    I have a shotgun, a shovel and 30 acres behind the barn.

  21. YOU! on SDMI Challenge Participants May Face DMCA Action · · Score: 1
    fucking softie liberal ;)
    You can take that "almost" and shove it up your ass!
    Biatch.

    Gee.. anyone want to take some karma from me? I just got too fucking much...

    I have a shotgun, a shovel and 30 acres behind the barn.

  22. Re:Even on Burlington Northern to Stop Gene Tests for CTS · · Score: 1
    I like the bits about the lawyers and the blunt instruments. Nice work.

    I have a shotgun, a shovel and 30 acres behind the barn.

  23. Re:Even on Burlington Northern to Stop Gene Tests for CTS · · Score: 1
    Dude . . .
    Alright.

    I'm not blaming the shareholders, in fact, thats pretty much the only thing that controls some corporations. You start fucking around - get sued - even if you win, your share price drops. If you have 100,000 shares that drop $5, thats a shitload of money. A lot of CEO's have A LOT more than 100,000.

    OK. about knowing everything that is going on in the country.. I'm sorry, I mean company - isn't this what some Germans used shortly after the second world war?

    You can't tell me that the fucking CEO did not know about this. Shit like this does not "get lost". The CEO and the board thought about it, voted for it and also voted to cover it up.
    As for genetic testing by your employer on whether or not to hire someone - that is at the very least unethical, it is a morally reprehensible act - but it is "Good Business".
    The question is what line can we cross.

    Of course, genetic testing was illegal in Gattaca too.

    I'm not asking for a utopia, just for some fucking accountability.
    Utopias are boring.
    I'm also asking for people, if the world becomes like Gattaca, to kick some ass and empty some skulls.

    And format your shit next time.

    I have a shotgun, a shovel and 30 acres behind the barn.

  24. Re:Even on Burlington Northern to Stop Gene Tests for CTS · · Score: 1
    Then we're in some weird parallel universe where the stupid and insipid rise to the top.

    Hmm.... Dunno about the parallel universe thing. Typically the family of the CEO rises to the top. Lets not rule out the stupid and insipid too soon.

    Dammit, AC comments are the best because the people who write them don't give a shit about karma.

    I have a shotgun, a shovel and 30 acres behind the barn.

  25. Re:Dude! on Burlington Northern to Stop Gene Tests for CTS · · Score: 1
    I'll go tell my son then. Methinks he sould be rather exited. (pssst. say that with a monty python accent for best results)

    I have a shotgun, a shovel and 30 acres behind the barn.