Because an even shittier show got canceled a week or two into the season, and since Paramout consists of nothing but Star Trek and shitty 80s teen movies, they decided to adapt a shitty 80s teen movie. More Star Trek, or lesbians that say "nifty". I think we came out ahead on this deal.
A month? Shit. I'm sure I've posted this story before, but I returned a Sony camcorder and got it back about a year and a half later, in the form of a new model of equivalent price, since they broke the original while trying to fix the battery contacts and the model had been discontinued by the time they gave up.
Naive son of a bitch. Run all you want, but in 20 years, I'll be the one selling stolen office supplies to the rest of you lawless nomads over the wall we'll build to seperate AOL from your little post-apocalyptic wasteland down there.
Seriously, though. You bash but the US is still the only place capable of the kinds of idealistic delusions that let us kick people out of power for shit like this. The British would be worried about economic chaos, the French would be worried about financing the tastefully topless women in their arthouse movies... Meanwhile the US government is creating new threats to it's own people just to avoid overanalyzing a 200 year-old sentence. So long as we can get enough people to notice Jefferson spinning in his grave, we're good.
Oh, and I take it you've never seen the fucking things you'll see running around Bolivia. Roaches the size of dogs, man, dogs! Lizards leaping through 11th-story windows and showering your guests in flesh-eating neurotoxin! Spiders that walk like men, living among you until they can drag the weak into their subterrainian tunnels! An entire continent written by Kafka, man, just remember to clench your ass when you sleep. That's where they lay their eggs...
Crack? That's it! What else can bring in more soft money than open source, Microsoft, and the rest of the I.P. industry combined? And we can still submit kernel patches from the street through the 2-way! It's win-win!
Keynes 2003: "Smith! What I tell you about opening up your mouth, bitch? Who the hell stopped the Great Depression up in here, can you tell me that?"
Smith 2003: "I know, you did, you did!"
Keynes 2003: "'You did' whaaaat?"
Smith 2003: "You did... sir."
Keynes 2003: "Yeahhh. That's right. Now go pretty yourself up for the Linux geeks, baby. You best not let me catch you turning off the customers again, you get me?"
Note: I forgot who I was trying to offend here. I think I got everybody, though.
Bush as a president is no worse than somebody like Reagan, say, but I never trust people who really want the office. Gore wanted it too much too, but he had reasons. He was the VP, he had careers riding on him winning, he was coming in with everything pointing to an easy win, against a guy who'd scraped out of a primary that had reopened just about every old wound in the opposing party... There was really no excuse for him to lose. And then he did.
It's like the Flyers playing the Mighty Ducks or some shit. It's 40-0 or something, until the Ducks somehow tie it in the last period. You end up with a half-second left, the arena lights suddenly go out, they come back on and the puck's in the Flyers' goal. Tell me the Flyers aren't gonna be pissed if they don't get a do-over.
Bush was odd, though. It sure as hell looked like should've won, no matter how many recounts Gore did. However, he sued like an unfrozen caveman to stop everything, no matter how stupid it was. It's like Nixon and Watergate. If it had looked like Nixon was going to lose, that might've made sense, but when everything points to you winning, doing unnecessary sneaky shit to make sure you win is just creepy. And with Bush, he wasn't even defending anything. It was way too early for him to be playing paranoid king.
I've nothing against our fruity leadership pool. You have to be crazy to want a shit job like president anyway. You see smart people lining up to run? Hell no. You get the bottom of the barrel. Failed lawyers living of their wives' superior legal skills, failed businessmen living off their fathers' connections, and, I guess, former CIA directors that need street cred to make up for the way their fathers built concentration camp furnaces. However, they can cause damage if they try and do things. W. Bush just seems to be a vehicle Steve Forbes's prospective cabinet used to actually get elected, and that makes me think that they'll do things. The last time the executive branch tried to acomplish anything we ended up in Vietnam, so that's how that works.
I lost my fucking point way the fuck back there. Whatever. I personally hate Bush, just as a person. I know people like him. Silver-spoon babies, but with depression-era parents. You ever notice how the parents of baby boomers always end up with this total self-interest thing? I'm assuming it's a symptom of the depression, but it's like the story about the first Bush and Barbara, and the way they didn't visit one of their newborn grandkids, even when they were driving right by the hospital on their way to the airport to go on vacation. It's creepy, but almost everybody from the depression ends up with that sort of thing on some level. Anyway, I get the sense from W that he has this big "justified" resentment of his parents because of that attitude, despite the way he ends up being ridiculously spoiled by them overall. Unlike people I know that share some of his traits, though, he doesn't have this nagging guilt about that keeping him humble. It's like he's completely oblivious to the irony of his own life. It's like the man's never second-guessed himself in his life.
Fuck, that wasn't the point either.
Shit this thing's getting long.
Ok, here's the point. He's like Clinton. Everybody hated him from the beginning because he came out of nowhere and beat the incumbent in an embarassing way while taking his own party in a direction the party leadership really had no interest in. Unlike Clinton, however, he started giving us material right off the blocks. Plus, he's insulated by a friendly congress and a decades-beyond-Clinton-esque grasp of media manipulation, so we worry about the damage he can do enough to invest in this kind of ranting on a regular basis.
There you go.
Holy fuck, I think that was the most offtopic fucking turd I've ever excreted. This calls for a new bottle of vodka, kids!
Yeah, most of America quit buying once they finished converting their vinyl/tape collections to CD.
Shit, I'm not even old and the last CD I got excited about was fucking David Bowie. Hence, the problem with the record industry. Nobody dies, that's the whole point, so they have to compete with every musician since the 30s. And now that they can't dangle a better format in front of you to get you to re-buy the old stuff, they're fucked. So, live continues to be the cash cow. Big whoop.
Blah blah blah. Guess what, the courts are part of your precious election law too. She might have disagreed with the Florida SC's ruling, but she's just an arm with a stamp, for fuck's sake. Who the fuck gave her veto power over the Florida judicial system?
Indeed. Let's get rid of the hypothetical. If I wasn't a nice guy who returns such things at the end of a relationship, I could have a half-dozen (albeit really badly done) pictures (I guess early 90's photo-hut guys let this stuff through, at least down there) of a 14 year old masturbating in the bathroom at a resort in Puerto Rico.
As far as I know, it was illegal for me to have those pictures, even then. For that matter, I don't see why it wasn't illegal for her to have taken them of herself in the first place. I doubt either of us would've been prosecuted, but is there really any exeption made in the laws against child porn for kids having, or having taken, the pictures? Actually, chances are our parents probably would've been the ones fucked over if the developers or somebody had reported it.
Trying to regulate sex always ends up like this. It's such an incredibly subjective topic that any regulation is eventually going to end up moronic. Is a blow job sex? Is a naked kid in an animal-print blanket furry-kiddie-porn? Are you an idiot to say that you like gay people as long as they don't touch each other? Is nodding your head to the radio close enough to dancing to be sexual harassment? Should I just cut of my balls with a weed-whacker now and be done with it?
I've unintentionally stumbled across everything from anime characters having their intestines ripped out to guys getting run over by a subway. And that's just from trolls on/. I can find you a thousand mutilated corpses in 20 minutes but I don't have a clue where I'd get a picture of a teenager with her pants down. Can other folks reading/. really come up with this stuff without much effort?
You are pretty damn fucking brilliant. Sign me up for your newsletter and tell me when the next Federalists' meeting is. It's been way too long since we've had a secession convention up here.
Yeah, but if you're in coupe or sedan... One of my friends has a convertable Porche. I was riding, and he stopped at a light at the bottom of a hill. A soccer mom in a Suburban came up behind us and, I swear to god, stopped OVER the back of the goddamn car, bumper at neck-level.
I got way more freaked out than him, probably because I live in suburban New Jersey, and know that we had a 50/50 chance of her just deciding to run the light and drive right over us.
A corporation is not a person, no matter how much it would like you to think of it that way. It is a contract, and contracts do not have morals. The people participating in the contract can be as moral as they want, but at the end of the day the corporation is just there to benefit it's investors. It can do that in any number of ways, but that's all it does.
Weekend Update is done to death? Out of everything wrong with SNL you pick Weekend Update? It's making fun of current events, how the hell does it get done to death? Shit, it's a vague concept, it's not even a sketch. Has having a guest host been done to death too?
Please, who the fuck trusts Fox News, honestly? You? I don't know about you, but I watch Fox because they make me feel good. On Fox, my president is competent and rarely high on coke, any problems with international diplomacy can be solved by pouring $50 bottles of wine into the street, and everyone will get their jobs back as soon as we pass a few tax cuts. On MSNBC, our children are fucking nutcases, the government of Texas is fleeing across state lines, and Iraq is getting taken over by Iran's Pat Robertson. Who the hell wants to see that shit?
Even the most facist of MSNBC's facist wankers make things look bad. Savage keeps trying to convince me that the ACLU is sending burly black men to have anal sex with me for some reason, and he doesn't even give me an upside! I mean, if I think about it, I can think of some shit for them to help me move while they're here, but he should figure these things out for me, like O'Reilly does. For that matter, Bill only tries to convince me that Penthouse Pets are coming to have anal sex with me instead, so right there I know who I'd rather watch.
Bill's last show dissapointed me, though. I liked how he blamed NYC's budget problems on bad budgeting instead of all that scary terrorism shit, and he did give me an out by telling me Bloomberg just has to be more like Bush (the model of fiscal discipline), but I really would've like another good boycott to clinch my cheery worldview until the weekend. I tried not buying Oreos, but it doesn't really work unless he asks me to do it (he's so dreamy).
"Do you want to have a good time?" said a voice from a doorway.
"As far as I can tell," said Ford, "I'm having one. Thanks."
"Are you rich?" said another.
This made Ford laugh.
He turned and opened his arms in a wide gesture. "Do I look rich?" he said.
"Don't know," said the girl. "Maybe, maybe not. Maybe you'll get rich. I have a very special service for rich people..."
"Oh yes?" said Ford, intrigued but careful. "And what's that?"
"I tell them it's OK to be rich."
Gunfire erupted from a window high above them, but it was only a bass player getting shot for playing the wrong riff three times in a row, and bass players are two a penny in Han Dold City.
Ford stopped and peered into the dark doorway.
"You what?" he said.
The girl laughed and stepped forward a little out of the shadow. She was tall, and had that kind of self-possessed shyness which is a great trick if you can do it.
"It's my big number," she said. "I have a Master's degree in Social Economics and can be very convincing. People love it. Especially in this city."
No, the RIAA/MPAA sucks. It's a union for companies. It's the stupidest goddamn idea ever. Even if it were run by Jesus him-fucking-self, it would still suck. Is there a reason why, say, movie theaters can't tell people how many times Jack Nicolson says "fuck"? Is there a reason that the pathetic goth at the record store can't tell me how many times Ludacris says "fuck"? Is there a reason why Sony can't just print up it's own threatening letters instead of paying tens of thousands of people to answer phones and run the copy machines first?
No, it's definately not just the minds behind them.
Or it could just be an indication of the disturbing degree to which the Bush administration panders to the moronic media personalities who find pronouncing such complex foreign names as "Ali" beyond them. Rihab Taha. How fucking hard is that? And you almost sound like you didn't do 6 lines of coke right before you went on.
As a bonus, I can actually tell who the hell you're talking about! Hey, why don't we just refer to everyone based on the inpenetrable inside jokes the CIA receptionists made about them? Bush could be "Mr. Snapple", Powell can be "Professor South Beach". It'll be great.
It's great that you bring up Dylan, who's really pretty close to rap. He sacrifices the singability of the words before he sacrifices the poetry. Look at, say, Like a Rolling Stone. He'll go off and just ramble a bunch of words into a beat instead of rewriting to something that fits easier but might not say exactly what he wants it to. On the other end there's Nirvana, with something like School where he's being purely lyrical. As long as you do it right, either way can turn out to be as profound as you want it to be.
Rap can be lyrical (I'm making up my own vocabulary here, I never went to music school or whatever, so I have no idea what words to use for this stuff) too, though, with somebody like Outkast, where the main thing is for the words to sound good. If you write down the lyrics to Bombs Over Baghdad or something, there's bits in there that are practically nonsense, but they keep the flow going.
I lost my point somewhere back there. Whatever. I guess rap doesn't have a special connection to poetry, but you're saying poetry makes a song good, and that's stupid. Poetry makes poems good. Songs are a different art form.
Yeah, and you're more likely to die from eating fish than from terrorism, but which noun did we declare war on?
I guess if North Korea tries to blow up San Francisco it's nice to have something with a chance at stopping it, but considering how fucking icy it's going to be in hell by the time we have a president with a clue about how these things work, I'd just as soon keep the dork in the dark.
A president who thinks he's got a missile shield is like a middle schooler wearing gang colors in the Bronx who thinks he knows karate. I think that's the worst analogy I've ever come up with. Good lord.
Slashdot Mirror
Because an even shittier show got canceled a week or two into the season, and since Paramout consists of nothing but Star Trek and shitty 80s teen movies, they decided to adapt a shitty 80s teen movie. More Star Trek, or lesbians that say "nifty". I think we came out ahead on this deal.
A month? Shit. I'm sure I've posted this story before, but I returned a Sony camcorder and got it back about a year and a half later, in the form of a new model of equivalent price, since they broke the original while trying to fix the battery contacts and the model had been discontinued by the time they gave up.
Naive son of a bitch. Run all you want, but in 20 years, I'll be the one selling stolen office supplies to the rest of you lawless nomads over the wall we'll build to seperate AOL from your little post-apocalyptic wasteland down there.
Seriously, though. You bash but the US is still the only place capable of the kinds of idealistic delusions that let us kick people out of power for shit like this. The British would be worried about economic chaos, the French would be worried about financing the tastefully topless women in their arthouse movies... Meanwhile the US government is creating new threats to it's own people just to avoid overanalyzing a 200 year-old sentence. So long as we can get enough people to notice Jefferson spinning in his grave, we're good.
Oh, and I take it you've never seen the fucking things you'll see running around Bolivia. Roaches the size of dogs, man, dogs! Lizards leaping through 11th-story windows and showering your guests in flesh-eating neurotoxin! Spiders that walk like men, living among you until they can drag the weak into their subterrainian tunnels! An entire continent written by Kafka, man, just remember to clench your ass when you sleep. That's where they lay their eggs...
Crack? That's it! What else can bring in more soft money than open source, Microsoft, and the rest of the I.P. industry combined? And we can still submit kernel patches from the street through the 2-way! It's win-win!
Keynes 2003: "Smith! What I tell you about opening up your mouth, bitch? Who the hell stopped the Great Depression up in here, can you tell me that?"
Smith 2003: "I know, you did, you did!"
Keynes 2003: "'You did' whaaaat?"
Smith 2003: "You did... sir."
Keynes 2003: "Yeahhh. That's right. Now go pretty yourself up for the Linux geeks, baby. You best not let me catch you turning off the customers again, you get me?"
Note: I forgot who I was trying to offend here. I think I got everybody, though.
Bush as a president is no worse than somebody like Reagan, say, but I never trust people who really want the office. Gore wanted it too much too, but he had reasons. He was the VP, he had careers riding on him winning, he was coming in with everything pointing to an easy win, against a guy who'd scraped out of a primary that had reopened just about every old wound in the opposing party... There was really no excuse for him to lose. And then he did.
It's like the Flyers playing the Mighty Ducks or some shit. It's 40-0 or something, until the Ducks somehow tie it in the last period. You end up with a half-second left, the arena lights suddenly go out, they come back on and the puck's in the Flyers' goal. Tell me the Flyers aren't gonna be pissed if they don't get a do-over.
Bush was odd, though. It sure as hell looked like should've won, no matter how many recounts Gore did. However, he sued like an unfrozen caveman to stop everything, no matter how stupid it was. It's like Nixon and Watergate. If it had looked like Nixon was going to lose, that might've made sense, but when everything points to you winning, doing unnecessary sneaky shit to make sure you win is just creepy. And with Bush, he wasn't even defending anything. It was way too early for him to be playing paranoid king.
I've nothing against our fruity leadership pool. You have to be crazy to want a shit job like president anyway. You see smart people lining up to run? Hell no. You get the bottom of the barrel. Failed lawyers living of their wives' superior legal skills, failed businessmen living off their fathers' connections, and, I guess, former CIA directors that need street cred to make up for the way their fathers built concentration camp furnaces. However, they can cause damage if they try and do things. W. Bush just seems to be a vehicle Steve Forbes's prospective cabinet used to actually get elected, and that makes me think that they'll do things. The last time the executive branch tried to acomplish anything we ended up in Vietnam, so that's how that works.
I lost my fucking point way the fuck back there. Whatever. I personally hate Bush, just as a person. I know people like him. Silver-spoon babies, but with depression-era parents. You ever notice how the parents of baby boomers always end up with this total self-interest thing? I'm assuming it's a symptom of the depression, but it's like the story about the first Bush and Barbara, and the way they didn't visit one of their newborn grandkids, even when they were driving right by the hospital on their way to the airport to go on vacation. It's creepy, but almost everybody from the depression ends up with that sort of thing on some level. Anyway, I get the sense from W that he has this big "justified" resentment of his parents because of that attitude, despite the way he ends up being ridiculously spoiled by them overall. Unlike people I know that share some of his traits, though, he doesn't have this nagging guilt about that keeping him humble. It's like he's completely oblivious to the irony of his own life. It's like the man's never second-guessed himself in his life.
Fuck, that wasn't the point either.
Shit this thing's getting long.
Ok, here's the point. He's like Clinton. Everybody hated him from the beginning because he came out of nowhere and beat the incumbent in an embarassing way while taking his own party in a direction the party leadership really had no interest in. Unlike Clinton, however, he started giving us material right off the blocks. Plus, he's insulated by a friendly congress and a decades-beyond-Clinton-esque grasp of media manipulation, so we worry about the damage he can do enough to invest in this kind of ranting on a regular basis.
There you go.
Holy fuck, I think that was the most offtopic fucking turd I've ever excreted. This calls for a new bottle of vodka, kids!
Yeah, most of America quit buying once they finished converting their vinyl/tape collections to CD.
Shit, I'm not even old and the last CD I got excited about was fucking David Bowie. Hence, the problem with the record industry. Nobody dies, that's the whole point, so they have to compete with every musician since the 30s. And now that they can't dangle a better format in front of you to get you to re-buy the old stuff, they're fucked. So, live continues to be the cash cow. Big whoop.
Blah blah blah. Guess what, the courts are part of your precious election law too. She might have disagreed with the Florida SC's ruling, but she's just an arm with a stamp, for fuck's sake. Who the fuck gave her veto power over the Florida judicial system?
Indeed. Let's get rid of the hypothetical. If I wasn't a nice guy who returns such things at the end of a relationship, I could have a half-dozen (albeit really badly done) pictures (I guess early 90's photo-hut guys let this stuff through, at least down there) of a 14 year old masturbating in the bathroom at a resort in Puerto Rico.
As far as I know, it was illegal for me to have those pictures, even then. For that matter, I don't see why it wasn't illegal for her to have taken them of herself in the first place. I doubt either of us would've been prosecuted, but is there really any exeption made in the laws against child porn for kids having, or having taken, the pictures? Actually, chances are our parents probably would've been the ones fucked over if the developers or somebody had reported it.
Trying to regulate sex always ends up like this. It's such an incredibly subjective topic that any regulation is eventually going to end up moronic. Is a blow job sex? Is a naked kid in an animal-print blanket furry-kiddie-porn? Are you an idiot to say that you like gay people as long as they don't touch each other? Is nodding your head to the radio close enough to dancing to be sexual harassment? Should I just cut of my balls with a weed-whacker now and be done with it?
I've unintentionally stumbled across everything from anime characters having their intestines ripped out to guys getting run over by a subway. And that's just from trolls on /. I can find you a thousand mutilated corpses in 20 minutes but I don't have a clue where I'd get a picture of a teenager with her pants down. Can other folks reading /. really come up with this stuff without much effort?
Masterminds? Is fucking Dr. No making this shit now?
You are pretty damn fucking brilliant. Sign me up for your newsletter and tell me when the next Federalists' meeting is. It's been way too long since we've had a secession convention up here.
Yeah, but if you're in coupe or sedan... One of my friends has a convertable Porche. I was riding, and he stopped at a light at the bottom of a hill. A soccer mom in a Suburban came up behind us and, I swear to god, stopped OVER the back of the goddamn car, bumper at neck-level.
I got way more freaked out than him, probably because I live in suburban New Jersey, and know that we had a 50/50 chance of her just deciding to run the light and drive right over us.
They're going to start bringing out hybird Lexi in a few years. They already have some out in Japan, along with hybrid SUVs.
A corporation is not a person, no matter how much it would like you to think of it that way. It is a contract, and contracts do not have morals. The people participating in the contract can be as moral as they want, but at the end of the day the corporation is just there to benefit it's investors. It can do that in any number of ways, but that's all it does.
Weekend Update is done to death? Out of everything wrong with SNL you pick Weekend Update? It's making fun of current events, how the hell does it get done to death? Shit, it's a vague concept, it's not even a sketch. Has having a guest host been done to death too?
Please, who the fuck trusts Fox News, honestly? You? I don't know about you, but I watch Fox because they make me feel good. On Fox, my president is competent and rarely high on coke, any problems with international diplomacy can be solved by pouring $50 bottles of wine into the street, and everyone will get their jobs back as soon as we pass a few tax cuts. On MSNBC, our children are fucking nutcases, the government of Texas is fleeing across state lines, and Iraq is getting taken over by Iran's Pat Robertson. Who the hell wants to see that shit?
Even the most facist of MSNBC's facist wankers make things look bad. Savage keeps trying to convince me that the ACLU is sending burly black men to have anal sex with me for some reason, and he doesn't even give me an upside! I mean, if I think about it, I can think of some shit for them to help me move while they're here, but he should figure these things out for me, like O'Reilly does. For that matter, Bill only tries to convince me that Penthouse Pets are coming to have anal sex with me instead, so right there I know who I'd rather watch.
Bill's last show dissapointed me, though. I liked how he blamed NYC's budget problems on bad budgeting instead of all that scary terrorism shit, and he did give me an out by telling me Bloomberg just has to be more like Bush (the model of fiscal discipline), but I really would've like another good boycott to clinch my cheery worldview until the weekend. I tried not buying Oreos, but it doesn't really work unless he asks me to do it (he's so dreamy).
No, the RIAA/MPAA sucks. It's a union for companies. It's the stupidest goddamn idea ever. Even if it were run by Jesus him-fucking-self, it would still suck. Is there a reason why, say, movie theaters can't tell people how many times Jack Nicolson says "fuck"? Is there a reason that the pathetic goth at the record store can't tell me how many times Ludacris says "fuck"? Is there a reason why Sony can't just print up it's own threatening letters instead of paying tens of thousands of people to answer phones and run the copy machines first?
No, it's definately not just the minds behind them.
Or it could just be an indication of the disturbing degree to which the Bush administration panders to the moronic media personalities who find pronouncing such complex foreign names as "Ali" beyond them. Rihab Taha. How fucking hard is that? And you almost sound like you didn't do 6 lines of coke right before you went on.
As a bonus, I can actually tell who the hell you're talking about! Hey, why don't we just refer to everyone based on the inpenetrable inside jokes the CIA receptionists made about them? Bush could be "Mr. Snapple", Powell can be "Professor South Beach". It'll be great.
It's great that you bring up Dylan, who's really pretty close to rap. He sacrifices the singability of the words before he sacrifices the poetry. Look at, say, Like a Rolling Stone. He'll go off and just ramble a bunch of words into a beat instead of rewriting to something that fits easier but might not say exactly what he wants it to. On the other end there's Nirvana, with something like School where he's being purely lyrical. As long as you do it right, either way can turn out to be as profound as you want it to be.
Rap can be lyrical (I'm making up my own vocabulary here, I never went to music school or whatever, so I have no idea what words to use for this stuff) too, though, with somebody like Outkast, where the main thing is for the words to sound good. If you write down the lyrics to Bombs Over Baghdad or something, there's bits in there that are practically nonsense, but they keep the flow going.
I lost my point somewhere back there. Whatever. I guess rap doesn't have a special connection to poetry, but you're saying poetry makes a song good, and that's stupid. Poetry makes poems good. Songs are a different art form.
Oh, Lord help us all.
Yeah, and you're more likely to die from eating fish than from terrorism, but which noun did we declare war on?
I guess if North Korea tries to blow up San Francisco it's nice to have something with a chance at stopping it, but considering how fucking icy it's going to be in hell by the time we have a president with a clue about how these things work, I'd just as soon keep the dork in the dark.
A president who thinks he's got a missile shield is like a middle schooler wearing gang colors in the Bronx who thinks he knows karate. I think that's the worst analogy I've ever come up with. Good lord.
No, no, not French, Freedom.
Congratulations! You're the most intelligent post on this thread!
*CUE MUSIC*
There she is... la la blah whateveerrr...