There may be something to the gender bias after all, something that goes beyond social roles and expectations. At least for me, the stereotypes have a painful amount of truth in them.
For starters, I'm not stupid. My idea of really fun recreational reading ranges from books about how (biological) viruses work to studies of artificial intelligence, the biochemistry and evolution of venom and toxins and medical case histories of human and animal envenomations. I enjoy and appreciate computers (especially the practical and philosophical benefits of Linux).
I can also kick a reasonable quantity of butt; my former hobbies have included swordfighting with the SCA and martial arts. Currently I enjoy wrestling alligators and doing unusual things to them in the name of science. I play with venomous snakes professionally (you can see me doing this on an upcoming ep of National Geographic Explorer).
Social pressures don't concern me; I don't spend a lot of time worrying about clothes, makeup, or conformity. I don't consider myself limited by this society's predefined gender roles in what I'm allowed to do with my life. Obviously. So that isn't a factor.
But I can't code, and math is hard. I also have a hard time reading maps and solving spatial relationship problems. I can read and retain complex information at a moderately unghodly speed (a geek bf once clocked me at two to three seconds a page), and have always done exceptionally well in tests of vocabulary and language learning. I have written and published.
As I said, I'm not stupid. But I'm not the same kind of smart as other types of geeks for whom math is second nature and coding a natural language. Out of frustration and disgust for what I used to think was my own stupidity when it came to left-brain tasks, I tried to apply myself to learn these things. I wanted to code. There is so much that is fascinating about computers and getting them to do things for you, and I wanted a part of it.
The result was a lot of frustration and misery. I learned - slowly - and I hated it. I was not having fun. Finally I went back to my biology textbooks with a sigh of relief. I have to conclude that for whatever reason, I have no talent or aptitude in that direction. I can sit down and solve a math or logic problem with a lot of cursing and muttering, but I don't enjoy it. If hard pressed, I could probably figure out (slowly) how to tinker with some gadget long enough to find the problem or fix it, but I would hate every second of it and it would make my brain hurt. I would rather pay somebody else to do it while I did experiments and wrote up a paper on the learning curve exhibited by members of the Agkistrodon genus. Now that's fun.
Am I stupid? No. My brain works fine in the academic fields I pursue with enjoyment. My brain does not work fine when I try to apply it to traditionally "male" tasks such as programming, engineering, spatial relationships, math and logic. It falls down on the job and leaves me feeling stupid when I try. I don't like this feeling, but there is nothing I can do about it.
If I can hypothesize that some of the studies I have read are correct, and I am an absolutely classic example of female brain wiring (language yes, math no, social/behavioral perceptions yes, spatial perceptions no), there is some merit to the stereotype. I completely understand girls who say, "Math is hard," and avoid the tasks they aren't good at. It isn't just social conditioning; it's not wanting to take an unpleasant job you're pretty sure you'll fall down on and look stupid in the process.
As for dating...I like geeks. Smart men are sexy men, and I would never go out with a man who couldn't hold an intelligent conversation on academic subjects. Unconventional men are also more likely to appreciate and accept my diverse and unconventional interests, and not be threatened by my vocabulary or academic interests themselves.
But there is one thing. Sometimes being with a geek makes me feel stupid in comparison when I can't do the same things he can do. I don't like that much, but I can live with it if I remind myself that we have different skills and a different set of smarts. I wonder if women who don't like geeks simply don't like to feel stupid, and compensate by scorning men who are "too intellectual"?
I really don't know. I don't think I'll ever have a lot of insight as to what goes on in the mind of a typical airhead gal or a typical jock guy, and I'm not sure I really want to. I do know the frustration I feel when I attempt a task that my brain doesn't seem to be wired for, and I can guess how someone else with less confidence and more social conditioning might act out their frustration if they felt the same way. Possibly the result would be much like what you are seeing as stereotypical female behavior.
A sample of one is insufficient to draw any meaningful conclusions from, of course, but I know how it feels from the inside, and I know what I believe on the subject. So what do you think?
Regards,
Tanith pleasure at netcom dot com http://venom.herpkeepers.com
Slashdot Mirror
There may be something to the gender bias after all, something that goes beyond social roles and expectations. At least for me, the stereotypes have a painful amount of truth in them.
For starters, I'm not stupid. My idea of really fun recreational reading ranges from books about how (biological) viruses work to studies of artificial intelligence, the biochemistry and evolution of venom and toxins and medical case histories of human and animal envenomations. I enjoy and appreciate computers (especially the practical and philosophical benefits of Linux).
I can also kick a reasonable quantity of butt; my former hobbies have included swordfighting with the SCA and martial arts. Currently I enjoy wrestling alligators and doing unusual things to them in the name of science. I play with venomous snakes professionally (you can see me doing this on an upcoming ep of National Geographic Explorer).
Social pressures don't concern me; I don't spend a lot of time worrying about clothes, makeup, or conformity. I don't consider myself limited by this society's predefined gender roles in what I'm allowed to do with my life. Obviously. So that isn't a factor.
But I can't code, and math is hard. I also have a hard time reading maps and solving spatial relationship problems. I can read and retain complex information at a moderately unghodly speed (a geek bf once clocked me at two to three seconds a page), and have always done exceptionally well in tests of vocabulary and language learning. I have written and published.
As I said, I'm not stupid. But I'm not the same kind of smart as other types of geeks for whom math is second nature and coding a natural language. Out of frustration and disgust for what I used to think was my own stupidity when it came to left-brain tasks, I tried to apply myself to learn these things. I wanted to code. There is so much that is fascinating about computers and getting them to do things for you, and I wanted a part of it.
The result was a lot of frustration and misery. I learned - slowly - and I hated it. I was not having fun. Finally I went back to my biology textbooks with a sigh of relief. I have to conclude that for whatever reason, I have no talent or aptitude in that direction. I can sit down and solve a math or logic problem with a lot of cursing and muttering, but I don't enjoy it. If hard pressed, I could probably figure out (slowly) how to tinker with some gadget long enough to find the problem or fix it, but I would hate every second of it and it would make my brain hurt. I would rather pay somebody else to do it while I did experiments and wrote up a paper on the learning curve exhibited by members of the Agkistrodon genus. Now that's fun.
Am I stupid? No. My brain works fine in the academic fields I pursue with enjoyment. My brain does not work fine when I try to apply it to traditionally "male" tasks such as programming, engineering, spatial relationships, math and logic. It falls down on the job and leaves me feeling stupid when I try. I don't like this feeling, but there is nothing I can do about it.
If I can hypothesize that some of the studies I have read are correct, and I am an absolutely classic example of female brain wiring (language yes, math no, social/behavioral perceptions yes, spatial perceptions no), there is some merit to the stereotype. I completely understand girls who say, "Math is hard," and avoid the tasks they aren't good at. It isn't just social conditioning; it's not wanting to take an unpleasant job you're pretty sure you'll fall down on and look stupid in the process.
As for dating...I like geeks. Smart men are sexy men, and I would never go out with a man who couldn't hold an intelligent conversation on academic subjects. Unconventional men are also more likely to appreciate and accept my diverse and unconventional interests, and not be threatened by my vocabulary or academic interests themselves.
But there is one thing. Sometimes being with a geek makes me feel stupid in comparison when I can't do the same things he can do. I don't like that much, but I can live with it if I remind myself that we have different skills and a different set of smarts. I wonder if women who don't like geeks simply don't like to feel stupid, and compensate by scorning men who are "too intellectual"?
I really don't know. I don't think I'll ever have a lot of insight as to what goes on in the mind of a typical airhead gal or a typical jock guy, and I'm not sure I really want to. I do know the frustration I feel when I attempt a task that my brain doesn't seem to be wired for, and I can guess how someone else with less confidence and more social conditioning might act out their frustration if they felt the same way. Possibly the result would be much like what you are seeing as stereotypical female behavior.
A sample of one is insufficient to draw any meaningful conclusions from, of course, but I know how it feels from the inside, and I know what I believe on the subject. So what do you think?
Regards,
Tanith
pleasure at netcom dot com
http://venom.herpkeepers.com