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User: The+Joy+of+O.+P.+P.

The+Joy+of+O.+P.+P.'s activity in the archive.

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Comments · 3

  1. An Urgent Plea on UWB Wireless Access Could Be Here Soon · · Score: -1

    After having seen a few of my recent posts to this site, you might be forgiven for thinking that I harbour unfriendly feelings towards the sites administrators. Nothing could be further from the truth. I'm not a bad guy, really. I like these guys.

    I want to help them.

    I'm going to start today, and the best part about it is you can help me help them. Here's how:

    The Get Timothy Lord Laid Appeal

    Dear Reader,

    I wish to bring to your attention an deplorable situation which cannot be allowed to continue. For too many years, Timothy Lord has been denied womanly affection. Of all the slashdot editors, I feel that he is the least undeserving of feminine attention, and yet, it seems that he suffers the most for the lack of it. His entry on the authors page is as follows:

    " If you know (or are) a smart, cute, wonderful single woman who likes aloud reading and laughing, please let me know. Substantial Reward, references available, have own car."

    I know we've all read his strangely formal plea, and felt in our souls the aching need he feels in his balls, but have any of us yet responded to this cry for help? I know there must be at least one smart, cute, single woman who reads this page. Unlike Timothy, many of us are blessed with the friendship of women who fit this description. And I know we'd all like to help out.

    Timothy is currently the most prolific author of slashdot. He is the only editor who has not abandoned his commitment to the slashdot readers in order to implement lameness filters that don't work and moderate posts "for the good of the readers."

    Timothy is slashdot's last honourable man.

    Is it right to keep his dick on ice like this? No, I didn't think so. He's a sweet guy. Why are you torturing him? What's wrong with you? Don't you have a heart?!

    Despite his sick dreams about Mena Suvari, I feel that Timothy is as perfect a gentleman you could hope to meet. If my instincts aren't recommendation enough, here's an artist's impression of what Tim would look like just after you put your keys on his forehead, prior to making him eat your ass. He cooks, too.

    So how can you help?

    • Are you an attractive young woman or sufficiently effeminate man. who lives in or near Tennessee? Do you want to make your life mean something? Why not send Tim and email and offer to service him? Don't forget to let us know, so we can all thank and respect you.
    • Do you know a woman of such low moral fibre that she would willingly offer herself for sex to a man she's never met? Want to pimp her to Tim? Email Tim, and reply here, so we can give you props, jigga-man.
    • Do you have Timothy's email address? I don't. Help us out. I'm guessing timothy@slashdot.org probably works.
    • Got some advice for the unloved? Help a brother out. Post it here.
    • If all else fails: If we can't put Tim in a warm bed with a willing female, we can at least put him in a seedy motel bed with a disinterested but well-remunerated whore. Help Tim and contribute to the prostitution industry of Tennessee. Pledge your donation below.

    Help in any way you can. Time is short. For all I know, Tim has never felt the love of a good woman. I'm pretty sure if you make it to 28 without getting laid at least once, your dick falls off in disgust. Plus, he's contemplating alternative lifestyles.

    Your friend,

    XXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
    XXX XXXX XX X
    X X XX XXXX XXXXXXX
    X XXX XXXXXXX XXXXXX
    X XXX XX XX X
    X XXX XX XXXXXXXXXXXX
    X X XXX X X
    XXX XXX XX XX
    XXXXXXXXX XXXXX XXXXX

    P.S. If this appeal meets with reasonable success, we'll be going ahead with some more ambitious projects. Look forward to seeing The Get CowboyNeal Blowed Appeal and The Get Michael Sims Iced Appeal.

    Some unrelated notes: Why is there an indigo girls song on the censorware page? Is Sims trying to tell us he's a lesbian?

    I wanted to use these pictures of Nitrozac in this letter, but couldn't think of a good way to include them. Hopefully someone will find a use for them:

  2. An Urgent Plea on Ghost in the Shell 2, Matrix Revisted, Daft Punk · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    After having seen a few of my recent posts to this site, you might be forgiven for thinking that I harbour unfriendly feelings towards the sites administrators. Nothing could be further from the truth. I'm not a bad guy, really. I like these guys.

    I want to help them.

    I'm going to start today, and the best part about it is you can help me help them. Here's how:

    The Get Timothy Lord Laid Appeal

    Dear Reader,

    I wish to bring to your attention an deplorable situation which cannot be allowed to continue. For too many years, Timothy Lord has been denied womanly affection. Of all the slashdot editors, I feel that he is the least undeserving of feminine attention, and yet, it seems that he suffers the most for the lack of it. His entry on the authors page is as follows:

    " If you know (or are) a smart, cute, wonderful single woman who likes aloud reading and laughing, please let me know. Substantial Reward, references available, have own car."

    I know we've all read his strangely formal plea, and felt in our souls the aching need he feels in his balls, but have any of us yet responded to this cry for help? I know there must be at least one smart, cute, single woman who reads this page. Unlike Timothy, many of us are blessed with the friendship of women who fit this description. And I know we'd all like to help out.

    Timothy is currently the most prolific author of slashdot. He is the only editor who has not abandoned his commitment to the slashdot readers in order to implement lameness filters that don't work and moderate posts "for the good of the readers."

    Timothy is slashdot's last honourable man.

    Is it right to keep his dick on ice like this? No, I didn't think so. He's a sweet guy. Why are you torturing him? What's wrong with you? Don't you have a heart?!

    Despite his sick dreams about Mena Suvari, I feel that Timothy is as perfect a gentleman you could hope to meet. If my instincts aren't recommendation enough, here's an artist's impression of what Tim would look like just after you put your keys on his forehead, prior to making him eat your ass. He cooks, too.

    So how can you help?

    • Are you an attractive young woman or sufficiently effeminate man. who lives in or near Tennessee? Do you want to make your life mean something? Why not send Tim and email and offer to service him? Don't forget to let us know, so we can all thank and respect you.
    • Do you know a woman of such low moral fibre that she would willingly offer herself for sex to a man she's never met? Want to pimp her to Tim? Email Tim, and reply here, so we can give you props, jigga-man.
    • Do you have Timothy's email address? I don't. Help us out. I'm guessing timothy@slashdot.org probably works.
    • Got some advice for the unloved? Help a brother out. Post it here.
    • If all else fails: If we can't put Tim in a warm bed with a willing female, we can at least put him in a seedy motel bed with a disinterested but well-remunerated whore. Help Tim and contribute to the prostitution industry of Tennessee. Pledge your donation below.

    Help in any way you can. Time is short. For all I know, Tim has never felt the love of a good woman. I'm pretty sure if you make it to 28 without getting laid at least once, your dick falls off in disgust. Plus, he's contemplating alternative lifestyles.

    Your friend,

    XXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
    XXX XXXX XX X
    X X XX XXXX XXXXXXX
    X XXX XXXXXXX XXXXXX
    X XXX XX XX X
    X XXX XX XXXXXXXXXXXX
    X X XXX X X
    XXX XXX XX XX
    XXXXXXXXX XXXXX XXXXX

    P.S. If this appeal meets with reasonable success, we'll be going ahead with some more ambitious projects. Look forward to seeing The Get CowboyNeal Blowed Appeal and The Get Michael Sims Iced Appeal.

    Some unrelated notes: Why is there an indigo girls song on the censorware page? Is Sims trying to tell us he's a lesbian?

    I wanted to use these pictures of Nitrozac in this letter, but couldn't think of a good way to include them. Hopefully someone will find a use for them:

  3. An Urgent Plea on Aerie Networks May Buy Metricom Network · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    After having seen a few of my recent posts to this site, you might be forgiven for thinking that I harbour unfriendly feelings towards the site administrators. Nothing could be further from the truth. I'm not a bad guy, really. I like these guys.

    I want to help them.

    I'm going to start today, and the best part about it is you can help me help them. Here's how:

    The Get Timothy Lord Laid Appeal

    Dear Reader,

    I wish to bring to your attention an deplorable situation which cannot be allowed to continue. For too many years, Timothy Lord has been denied womanly affection. Of all the slashdot editors, I feel that he is the least undeserving of feminine attention, and yet, it seems that he suffers the most for the lack of it. His entry on the authors page is as follows:

    " If you know (or are) a smart, cute, wonderful single woman who likes aloud reading and laughing, please let me know. Substantial Reward, references available, have own car."

    I know we've all read his strangely formal plea, and felt in our souls the aching need he feels in his balls, but have any of us yet responded to this cry for help? I know there must be at least one smart, cute, single woman who reads this page. Unlike Timothy, many of us are blessed with the friendship of women who fit this description. And I know we'd all like to help out.

    Timothy is currently the most prolific author of slashdot. He is the only editor who has not abandoned his commitment to the slashdot readers in order to implement lameness filters that don't work and moderate posts "for the good of the readers."

    Timothy is slashdot's last honourable man.

    Is it right to keep his dick on ice like this? No, I didn't think so. He's a sweet guy. Why are you torturing him? What's wrong with you? Don't you have a heart?!

    Despite his sick dreams about Mena Suvari, I feel that Timothy is as perfect a gentleman you could hope to meet. If my instincts aren't recommendation enough, here's an artist's impression of what Tim would look like just after you put your keys on his forehead, prior to making him eat your ass. He cooks, too.

    So how can you help?

    • Are you an attractive young woman or sufficiently effeminate man. who lives in or near Tennessee? Do you want to make your life mean something? Why not send Tim and email and offer to service him? Don't forget to let us know, so we can all thank and respect you.
    • Do you know a woman of such low moral fibre that she would willingly offer herself for sex to a man she's never met? Want to pimp her to Tim? Email Tim, and reply here, so we can give you props, jigga-man.
    • Do you have Timothy's email address? I don't. Help us out. I'm guessing timothy@slashdot.org probably works.
    • Got some advice for the unloved? Help a brother out. Post it here.
    • If all else fails: If we can't put Tim in a warm bed with a willing female, we can at least put him in a seedy motel bed with a disinterested but well-remunerated whore. Help Tim and contribute to the prostitution industry of Tennessee. Pledge your donation below.

    Help in any way you can. Time is short. For all I know, Tim has never felt the love of a good woman. I'm pretty sure if you make it to 28 without getting laid at least once, your dick falls off in disgust. Plus, he's contemplating alternative lifestyles.

    Your friend,

    XXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
    XXX XXXX XX X
    X X XX XXXX XXXXXXX
    X XXX XXXXXXX XXXXXX
    X XXX XX XX X
    X XXX XX XXXXXXXXXXXX
    X X XXX X X
    XXX XXX XX XX
    XXXXXXXXX XXXXX XXXXX

    P.S. If this appeal meets with reasonable success, we'll be going ahead with some more ambitious projects. Look forward to seeing The Get CowboyNeal Blowed Appeal and The Get Michael Sims Iced Appeal.

    Some unrelated notes: Why is there an indigo girls song on the censorware page? Is Sims trying to tell us he's a lesbian?

    I wanted to use these pictures of Nitrozac in this letter, but couldn't think of a good way to include them. Hopefully someone will find a use for them: