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BumWine.com lists the only wines you'll ever need.

Don't you mean box?

Why look at the little fancy pants who gets his wine in a box.

Real alcoholics still get it by the bottle.
http://bumwine.com/

This is better:
"Tales of Cisco-induced semi-psychotic fits are common. Often, people on a Cisco binge end up curled into a fetal ball, shuddering and muttering paranoid rants."

http://www.bumwine.com/cisco.html

That's not vodka at all, sir. I believe this would dovetail more neatly into the great pantheon of bum wines: your Mad Dog 20/20, Thunderbird, and what have you. :)

Tales of Cisco-induced semi-psychotic fits are common. Often, people on a Cisco binge end up curled into a fetal ball, shuddering and muttering paranoid rants. Nudity and violence may well be involved too.

I never think of linksys when I'm drinking bum wine.

Just as long as they don't start analyzing crap like the stuff at http://www.bumwine.com./ How are they honestly picking which wines to analyze?

Allow me to introduce you to some old friends from college.

Allow me to introduce you to some old friends from college.

Allow me to introduce you to some old friends from college.

Allow me to introduce you to some old friends from college.

Allow me to introduce you to some old friends from college.

I wonder if the bottles will come indivdually wrapped in a paper bag.

Hey, it's good enough for Mentats!

It is by will alone I set my mind in motion.
It is by the juice of Sapho that thoughts acquire speed, the lips acquire stains, the stains become a warning.
It is by will alone I set my mind in motion.

Um, in the case of Windows I would compare it to a "vintage" 6 month old bottle of Night Train

Forget Thunderbird. Cisco's much better!

17.5% alcohol by volume, baby!

Er, wait, you're talking about email, huh?

Never mind, then, carry on... [hic!]