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15+ years?

Ah, how time flies. I had no idea that it had already gone 15 years since those days.

They could fix it quite easily actually, all they would have to do is buy (or build something similar to) filehippo app manager and ask the user when they install a third party program that uses their own if they would like to use their app manager instead.

If you can settle for just updates, filehippo's update checker works well to get quick links to the original installers (also of older versions) for programs you have already installed:
http://filehippo.com/download_... (The newer versions are supposed to be sucky).

Secunia PSI 2.0 is also good: http://secunia.com/vulnerabili... -- 3.0 was more noob-friendly, last time I checked (Yes, I realize the irony of purposefully installing older versions of programs created to update software to their latest version).

They don't help in installing or uninstalling software and only Secunia supports automatic updates for some programs, but keeping programs up to date under Windows using these tools is at least acceptable.

The final release before Winamp was officially "shut down" by AOL and subsequently purchased is 5.666 (note the three sixes, not two) and can be found here.

All I want is a program that combines Autoruns with StartupMonitor. and steps in when any Dll or executable is about to be modified, hell, the OS should do that anyway.

Over 5 years I have enjoyed running my PC virus free. and without the annoyance of anti-virus software's constant nagging. VirusTotal for when I'm in doubt and a scan with Malwarebytes Anti-Malware for when I get a tinge of paranoia.

But how easy is it for Joe and Jane Normal to even FIND that, much less disable it? To steal a line from Tron "I stand for the users" and I fricking HATE when a program uses shit like Task Scheduler without giving an easy UI element in the program to disable it. Last I checked there was NO checkbox or button to disable that from within Chrome, with Dragon there is a checkbox so it CAN be done in a Chromium based browser and in Pale Moon, the Gecko based I hand to customers, it doesn't run any service at all, just doing the IMHO more sane thing of checking upon launch for any updates.

Just remember what is trivial for YOU to do does NOT mean its trivial for THEM to do and fixing Windows boxes 6 days a week I can tell you that all that shit loading itself as services and Task Scheduler tasks DOES weigh down a system pretty badly, especially those AMD Bobcat duals that Worst Buy has been pushing for home boxes and laptops of late. I personally like the Bobcat chips because of how insanely low powered they are but you really have to watch not getting too much shit loading in the background or they just crawl, which is why shit loading in Task Scheduler without a UI in program irks me as most users don't even know where Task Scheduler is, much less how to tell what is an important Windows service and what is just bullshit. There is NO REASON why Google couldn't take the more sane approach of just checking on startup for a new version, this running constantly in the background is just bullshit IMHO.

So for my users I disable all that phone home checkers and services and crap and just have Filehippo Update Checker set to run once a day. Not only does this cut down a HELL of a lot in used resources as Filehippo only uses around half a Mb of RAM and less than 2% of CPU even on a Bobcat or Atom but it also gives the user a "one stop shop" that lets them update ALL the major third party stuff from one simple to use location. Between that and Ninite for initial installs its better for me, better for them, and you don't have every dang program running in the background constantly checking for updates which is just a better way to do it IMHO.

Well considering the how to write a Linux virus in 5 easy steps article uses Python and when I search for "Python malware" I get over 600,000 hits? There is probably plenty of Python malware already out there, it just doesn't get as much press as a Windows bug as it has a smaller target. But as long as there is the potential to make money on infected machines I'm sure that somebody will be targeting just about every combo of language and OS you can think of, no OS is immune to a targeted attack.

Now that said I have to deal with some customers that are...sigh...can you say "click happy" and clueless? So after many hours of trying various combos on test boxes here at the shop I have come up with what I call my "foolproof Windows for fools" that makes the machines as solid as tanks and cuts the living hell out of the risk of malware. basically short of them going "Why yes, please infect my machine" which sadly I have had to deal with at least once, well short of them going the extra mile to be super stupid you'll have a system that short of hardware failure won't be going anywhere. For those that want to know how, recipe is as follows:

1.-First make sure their software is all up to date and Windows is set to automatically download and install patches, otherwise they are likely to just ignore the patches and leave the machine vulnerable.

2.- Get a low rights mode browser with ABP, any Chromium based will do but I use Comodo Dragon as it has privalert which will block all the tracking crap and you can choose to use Comodo Secure DNS in the browser only, this helps to block a LOT of infected websites from loading in the first place.

3.- For an AV I recommend either Avast Free or Comodo IS, both have their pluses. Avast AV is a little more "chatty" about what its doing and I found some folks really like that, Comodo IS has built in sandboxing and is easy to configure for the actual user, so its really up to you as both are quite good at stopping malware.

4.- Install FileHippo Update Checker and have it set to run at startup, it only uses a couple hundred KB of memory and will tell them when their third party software is out of date as well as provide links to the software, this keeps them from downloading "flash updates" and other dubious software updates. if the Hippo doesn't say it needs updating then it don't need updating.

5.-Finally you need to have a hidden backup and restore partition, just in case they ever manage to figure a way to get infected or if a family member comes over and trashes things. I am testing Paragon Drive backup for this roll but since I haven't finished testing I'd have to go with Comodo Time Machine but be aware its no longer supported and I don't think its been tested with Windows 8. That said the nice thing here is you can lock a snapshot with everything set up and all the third party software loaded so you have your own "OEM restore partition" without the trialware crap and it can also create snapshots on a schedule and be accessed if the machine can't even boot to desktop by just pushing the Home key. this way if they manage to somehow seriously screw up the OS a single push of the Home key and 20 minutes later they are back up and running.

With these 5 little steps that takes less than an hour all told you will have a machine you can let the most clueless users get a hold of and not have to worry about them borking the system I have several "click happy" customers that have been on this system for over 2 years now and not a single bug, runs just as good as when I handed it to them. In fact I have only had to help one that has been on this system, she forgot to log off and her 16 year old niece got on after she left and did God knows what to the system so it wouldn't boot to desktop. 15 minu

You start by doing the most obvious thing, that is making sure all their software is up to date.

That's a little problematic on Windows, no? You have to open each app ever installed and figure out how to check for updates. Definitely a non-trivial issue. (One of the benefits of Linux package management is there is a single spot to update all S/W installed within the package management framework.)

Next you install FileHippo Update Checker and tell it to ignore beta releases.

Does this solve the problem for all installed software on Windows?

Unless he is willing to be full time 24/7 tech support that would be a BAD idea. Just look at the serious guttings that have happened to Linux in just the last 5 years, ALSA for Pulse, Gnome 2 for GnomeShell then this funky ass hybrid of the 2, KDE 3 to KDE 4 (which was frankly shoved out in alpha quality at best by ALL the "user friendly" distros) and finally the changes in the wireless networking that has made USB wireless hit or miss, usually miss.

Frankly if you know what you are doing you can set up an "idiot proof" Windows that short of the old guy clicking "Why yes, I DO want to get infected, STFU and let me get infected!" then nothing is gonna happen. With this system I've had customers that picked up more bugs than a Bangkok whore on coupon day and they are squeaky clean. Everybody ready? Here we go..

You start by doing the most obvious thing, that is making sure all their software is up to date. Once that is finished you get their ass OFF IE onto something that doesn't have a giant bullseye on it, personally I prefer Comodo Dragon as not only does it have low rights mode like Chrome, but it also has Privalert, which will block all the tracking crap (you can of course whitelist any page with a single click, even grandma could do it) and you have the option of Comodo DNS which in this case i would say YES, use it, as it blocks many malware pages from loading. Once its installed go ahead and add ABP, in less he likes ads bugging the shit out of him, and I usually install ForecastFox as its nice to have the 5 day forecast and the radar right there.

Next you install Paragon Backup and Recovery Free as this will let you not only make a hidden backup capsule (think OEM restore partition, only custom made by you and up to date) but you can set it to any kind of schedule you like, including differential, daily, weekly, whatever. I used to use Comodo Time Machine as it allows you to restore even if they hosed the boot image but its not supported on Windows 8. if you are running 7 might want to check it out. Next you install FileHippo Update Checker and tell it to ignore beta releases. the reason you do this is to keep the old guy for falling for the "you need the latest flash, just download "Iz_Not_Bug_Iz_Flash.exe" right now!". you tell him if the little Hippo don't say there is an update there is NO update, period.

Finally you have the AV, here you can use either Avast free or Comodo IS, I prefer the latter as its not as "chatty" and has built in sandboxing by default but some folks like chatty, both are VERY good at stop malware pages before load and Comodo IS sandboxing means if the old guy does try to run something nasty it'll minimize the risk.

so there you have it, it looks more complex than it actually is, takes about an hour all told depending on how out of date the software on the system is. Once its done that's it, just leave them be, they'll be safe as houses. The browser is sandboxed and in low rights mode, you have the AV scanning every page before load, the browser is blocking ads (one of the biggest attack vectors) and tracking crap, and to top it all off the OS has a hidden encrypted partition with a backup image so if they by some miracle ever do figure out how to break something you can have it back up in under 30 minutes, no problem.

Well when you are running a little shop like mine having to constantly redownload the damned patches ends up hurting my bottom line and with WSUS I can just keep ALL the patches and ALL the SPs and ALL the Office and .NET patches on a share drive on this little Sempron 1.8GHz a customer traded in years ago (makes a GREAT nettop, only uses around 35w under load) and like I said, run it once a month, I usually wait until the Friday after Patch Tuesday for the WSUS Offline guys to have time to update their scripts, and its ALL done. And since its just using a WGET straight from the MSFT servers (It'll even pop up a CMD window so you can watch if you like, its all pretty standard WGET scripts calling the standard MSFT update servers) there is no risk of a MITM or getting a piece of malware stuck in there, you even get the choice of whether you want to include WGA or not in the builds.

But between WSUS Offline and Ninite for the third party stuff I've been able to cut a new build down to less than an hour and a half and even better I am needed less than 10 minutes of that hour and a half since its all unattended. I don't have to deal with slipstreaming and making new discs, don't have to deal with constantly checking to make sure I've got the latest software, frankly ALL the bullshit and hassle is done FOR me with nothing harder than "clicky clicky, go make a sammich" on my end. Its nice. Oh and if you have an older machine you need to check the third party software on just run Update Checker after you've updated the system with WSUS and it'll tell you if ANY of the third party stuff is out of date, and give you handy little links with direct downloads of the software that's out.

So like I said any questions just let me know in a later post or you can shoot me an email at the address in my UID, I usually check it once a day. And I have a feeling you'll be like me and damned glad you have WSUS in your toolbox, really takes the bullshit and pain out of dealing with Windows Updates. Kinda sad you need a third party tool to do this, but let's face it APK, MSFT first party tools have always sucked ass. if you want anything done right you pretty much HAVE to go third party, as MSFT either tries to force you to a higher SKU or simply half asses the design, they really suck at building decent tools for their OSes.

There is a MUCH easier way to update all your third party stuff friend, frankly there is also a much easier way to install it in the first place as well. For the initial install just go to Ninite and check what you need, oh and no toolbars or forced Chrome install either, while if you have a system you just need to check updates for use Update Checker which will scan the system and pop up the browser with a list of anything that is out of date, you can even choose to have it show you beta releases if you'd like to be cutting edge.

So there really is no point in doing things the old way friend, BTW check my previous post for a link to WSUS Offline which will let you install all the Windows patches just as easy and unattended.

Exactly so. The latest K-Lite Mega Codec Pack was released on April 24th, and - as it has for as long as I can recall - it includes the wonderfully minimalist and functional MPC.

And just for completeness, the Filehippo Update Checker also deserves a mention.

I like FileHippo more. It has a bigger collection than ninite, and it tracks both stable and beta versions of most free software and freeware on Windows. They also have a useful (and a completely optional download) update utility that checks if there are any updates available for software on your computer. If yes, you can let it update from their website. It's pretty awesome, all in all.

http://filehippo.com/software/multimedia/

Real Alternative, Quicktime alternative, K-Lite Codec Pack, you name it.

"mee too" for FileHippo.com. their update checker rocks.

FileHippo also has an update checker:
http://www.filehippo.com/updatechecker/

Like it or not, unless Microsoft decides to make their planned app store open to everybody, those sites do provide a reasonable service in notifying users of updates to software that don't have built-in update checking mechanisms.

I always try to use Filehippo. They're the only download site where I've never seen an ad deceptively disguised as a "Download" button.

And today (maybe yesterday) they released 13.0.782.11, which replaced 13.0.782.10, which (I kid you not) replaced 13.0.782.1 (no zero at the end, otherwise, same number). I draw the conclusion that they are happy to make an install available every time they push the "compile" button.

You can see the build history (and get any of them that you want to) at Filehippo

McGrew there is actually a REASON for patch Tuesday and that is because everyone was having a shitfit that the patches would come willy nilly! With Patch Tuesday it makes it MUCH easier to plan for updates in a corporate environment, and since Windows rules the business world by a HUGE margin you can't expect them to fuck over such a large client base just because Mcgrew wants updates quicker.

That said if you show even tiniest bit of common sense .then your risk of infection is practically zip which my customers that have been running 8 years on the same XP install and simply having me come over to do an occasional memory upgrade can attest, so whether patches come out on Tuesday or the week after tomorrow really shouldn't matter! Watch how easy it is to have a nice clean running Windows from first install..

1.-Install Wndows. 2.- Run WSUS Offline from a flash, which if you've checked the little checkbox will have all the SPs, .NET, and all the patches in one nice easy to run place. 3.- Install Comodo Dragon from the same flash, so they'll have a nice browser that uses low rights mode and sandboxing and so you won't have to worry about IE, after installing go ahead and add ABP for Chrome which kills ad based malware dead. While you are at it you can install any third party software that doesn't need constant updating, I install LibreOffice, Win 7 Codec pack (which is great as it lets you burn just about any format in WinDVD maker, which folks just love) and Media Player Classic Home Cinema 4.- Go to Ninite to install the third party software that needs to be fresh, depending on the user. I usually install Flash, Foxit PDF Reader, any messenger program they use, along with Irfanview, Picasa, Avast Free, Malwarebytes, along with CCleaner and Defraggler. For burning I carry Ashampoo on the flash as folks like its layout better than CDBurnerXP. As this finishes up I usually add WinUtilities, which automates registry cleaning and the dumping of temp files along with tossing broken shortcuts. For the finale add Filehippo Update checker which only takes up 300Kb and will let them know when there are third party updates like flash, so they aren't using an old vulnerable solution.

And that's it! Notice how nothing there is more complex than going "clicky clicky" and doesn't cost you a dime? And a machine you've followed these simple steps with will be fine for anything short of user stupidity, which NO OS can keep the stupid from doing dumb shit, like running "Iz_Not_Viruz_Porn_Codecs!" trying to see teh tittiez. But a machine done this way, while sensibly having Automatic Updates set to Automatic (duh!) will give you years of trouble free service, while having all the third party software updated without the user having to constantly check for patches and with both Comodo dragon AND Avast doing sandboxing, as well as dragon running low rights mode, means web bugs really aren't going anywhere. With just a tiny bit of preparation and common sense (don't run email attachments, if they want free porn tell them to go to myfreepaysite.com which has like 5000 DVDs of porn for free, if they insist on having P2P Gnucleus or Emule with P2P shield running in Avast, no making kids accounts admin) your Windows machine will run trouble free for years, just as my customers after I'm through only need to come to me for hardware upgrades.

i get all my updates from http://filehippo.com/

v11.0.672.2 is also a beta.
http://www.filehippo.com/download_google_chrome/

Well I'm happy to help. Dealing with quite a few senior customers I found there really isn't any way to break them of their trusting nature, I guess because they grew up in a time when there weren't so many douchebags. But I would like to point out there are a couple of things you'll have to do, although I doubt it will affect any clueless family members.

1.-Comodo Time Machine does not like dual boots with Win 7. Linux, win9x, win2k, not a problem. But if you install windows 7 to anywhere but the C: drive it changes itself to C: on startup, for example I am running Windows 7 and even though I installed on my D: it currently says it is on C: and my XP which is on C: is on E:. it does this because win 7 file and registry virtualization requires the C: drive letter but as a side effect it freaks Time Machine out. it won't hurt anything, it just won't run.

2.-after first install and scan it will take Comodo Av or Comodo Internet Security (on XP I prefer CIS, and on Vista/7 I prefer Comodo AV, as the firewall in XP doesn't block outbound like Comodo AV and Vista/7 does) about a week to learn their usage habits. By that I mean it will ask them "Did you mean to launch this?" for the first week until it learns their apps. If you know which apps they use most often you can launch them yourself, otherwise they will have to click yes when they first launch an app. Once it has learned their patterns it is pretty unobtrusive and doesn't require an email address or constantly hit the with pop ups wanting to upsell them either. It also has a well designed control system so if someone knowledgeable such as yourself wants you can customize everything to your tastes or the desired security level, for example setting a rule that all browsers MUST run in the sandbox. It also has an excellent whitelist so once the PC is declared clean essential windows services won't cause a permission pop up.

But if you have clueless relatives or those you have to support that live a good distance the Comodo one two punch along with Ninite and Filehippo Update Checker really are a Godsend. Ninite gives you a simple way to give them the latest of the most popular apps and codecs, so if say they call and say "It says I need Flash" you can send them to Ninite and tell them after running it if it still asks for Flash it is a virus. With Ninite it is easy as "check box, run installer" since it does a full web based unattended with NO TOOLBARS or other crap. And with Filehippo it will put a little icon that uses just a few dozen KB of RAM in the tray and will alert them if a third part app is out of date, because as we know third party apps like Adobe Reader when out of date (which I just give them Foxit from the Ninite site) are one of the biggest sources of malware drive bys.

But with these plus those two Comodo apps I linked to earlier you can take the hassle and guesswork out of admin duties for family PCs. Comodo AV keeps them clean, Time Machine gives you a way to restore easily by phone even if they manage to BSOD the box, Ninite gives you an easy secure way to get them the latest apps, and Filehippo lets them keep them updated so YOU don't have to. Believe me with nearly 2 decades supporting home and small business users there really is no easier way to keep a Windows box up and running smooth.

Then you are doing it wrong I'm afraid. Use the combo of XP ISO Builder and RyanVM and you are looking at maaaybe 20-30 minutes, and that is if you want the full customized unattended install with everything from the desktop to services preconfigured.

For XP X64, Vista, and Windows 7 I've found having WSUS Offline makes it trivial to bring a machine from fresh install to fully patched. It will even integrate service packs if you so choose, but I prefer to simply have a disc with the latest service pack slipstreamed so WSUS Offline can fit all the X86 on a single DVD and all the x64 on a second single DVD. That way I just require 2 DVD to update ANY Windows OS from Win2K- Windows 7 X64. Just burn a new Driverpack disc every couple of months and that will cover a good 90% of the hardware out there, more if you go to the forums and pick up the third party packs like TV cards and funky drivers for things like Bluetooth.

Finally for software your old friend Ninte has that covered, with more than 90 of the most common apps in x86 and x64 with NO toolbars or other crap to worry about, and you can even suggest your favorite apps and they will check them out and often add them. I personally like Klite Codec pack because of its hardware acceleration, so I suggested it and voila! There it is. And the apps are constantly being updated to the latest version, all unattended and ready to go. Finish it off with Filehippo Update Checker so the user doesn't have to worry about keeping up when the latest version of an app has been released. And all is gravy. Time? Maybe an hour and a half on a slower P4, less than an hour on most modern systems.

So now instead of all the BS I simply run WSUS offline once a month after Patch Tuesday, burn the two DVDs (x86 and x64) it automatically produces for me which also has all the Office patches included, and check driverpacks Base app once every month or so to make sure I have the latest X86 and X64 drivers. my actual time for doing so is maybe 5 minutes, since I can simply launch the apps and let them do the work. So if it is really taking you a half a day then you are simply taking the long way about it. So please enjoy these free tools and not have to deal with the long wait again!

That is why I have been saying for ages the most common software like Flash, along with updates to drivers like NV and ATI, should come through Windows Update. But sadly every Joe Schmo company that didn't get included would scream "antitrust!". What I've found to work in the meantime with clueless users is simply tell them "If a site says you need to update Flash or Java or whatever, go here, put checkboxes on what you need, then run it". Ninite has all the most common like Flash, Silverlight, .NET, Java, as well as browsers, media players, KLite Codec pack for those that get the "you need codecs to play" problem, pretty much anything they need.

I tell them if the site still demands they install something after running Ninite it is a virus and should be ignored and avoided. It does help to cut down on the clueless ones whose machines I don't have direct access to. For those I DO have access to I have Update Checker installed and running in the background so they KNOW if Filehippo don't tell them there is an update there is NO update. Everyone makes fun of the "stupid" users, but really nobody can know everything and some of these sites are damned hard to tell from real. Giving the clueless a few tools such as this really helps cut down the infections, although I think windows Update doing it would be even better.

Or you could just...this is a thought, just throwing it out there...use Foxit with SandboxIE and call it a day. Or if you would prefer even more protection run Comodo AV or Internet Security and have EVERYTHING sandboxed. And that is of course if you are running on an older Windows, as Vista and 7 already do file and registry virtualization.

It really isn't hard to isolate programs anymore, or set up a machine so all but the most determined idiots can't hose it. I have my customers as well as my family on a combo of Comodo+Firefox with ABP+Foxit and frankly I can't remember the last time I had to clean a bug from one of those machines. Short of them ignoring the AV and saying "Yes, I'd like a bug, please install it!" they really have nothing to worry about. Just have everything set to autoupdate, along with an easy to setup program like Winutilities Free to automate registry and broken shortcut cleaning and defragging and the machine is as close to an appliance as one can get. It takes me less than a half hour and then I don't have to mess with it ever again.

So banning flash really is a case of chopping off your head to get rid of a headache. The users will scream bloody murder when their Farmville and videos don't work, and frankly it is unnecessary. You can even set up Filehippo update checker so all their third party programs are updated regularly as well. It really ain't hard AC.

The Update Checker will scan your computer for installed software, check the versions and then send this information to FileHippo.com to see if there are any newer releases. These are then neatly displayed in your browser for you to download.

http://www.filehippo.com/updatechecker/

> "Defragmenting or "defragging" a SSD takes up many write/erase cycles... which shortens the lifetime of an SSD, even if it's also cleaning up the drive."

No, defragging is not cleaning up an SSD drive. There is no reason to defrag an SSD because their is no latency getting to a further sector.

> "it's a delicate balance, how often you should defrag your SSD for optimum performance and lifetime"

How about "NEVER"?

> "Only defrag when necessary!"

Argh!

I see your point - but also consider that NTFS is pretty stupid, and may split a large file into 15000 chunks. There is some performance impact associated with locating all those chunks. It may be on the CPU end rather than SSD end, but it's there. If you want to check how bad it is on your own PC, use a tool like Defraggler - it can tell you how many fragments your worst files are split into.

With a smart filesystem, there would be no reason at all to defragment an SSD.

I feel that even with stupid NTFS, you should avoid defragmenting SSDs.

BTW if you either go to the Foxit site or even better run Filehippo update checker which will keep your Windows machine up to date with regards to 3rd party programs, you'll see that Foxit has already released a new version that fixes the bug.

So the TFA should probably read "affects previous versions of Foxit" as like Firefox Foxit is great about getting patches out there quickly when threats are found.

Actually windows is nearly as simple, just use Update Checker from FileHippo and there you are. It barely uses any RAM if you absolutely must have the latest udpates you can have it run at startup and check whenever you like, and it will notify you when updates are available and can take you straight to a links page on FileHippo for the updates you need.

Pretty simple really, and if my nearly 70 year old dad can use it to keep his machine up to date then anybody can.

filehippo has an update checker. i've used it for a while and it works well: http://www.filehippo.com/updatechecker/

Download.com has it all. Programs of every description.

Open Source. Closed Source. Free Ware. Trialware. Inkscape is there.

It's a painless way to survey pretty much everything worthwhile that is out there - and infinitely more accessible than SourceForge.

File Hippo has much narrower, utilitarian focus, but the essential apps are there. File Hippo's update checker is quick and reliable.

1. updates that frequently fail to install: My friend's laptop constantly complains about needing ~44 critical updates, but any attempt to install them results in an instant "44 updates failed to install". On my laptop, luckily, most updates installed, but I always had 2 or 3 that wouldn't.

2. Multiple reboots: Install Windows XP (without any service packs) and try updating. Count the number of reboots. Try a similar test on any Linux distro (pick a CD as old as you want), notice how you only need to reboot once to have all of the updates apply.

3. Still needing to update anything else manually: Turn on a computer with Windows that hasn't been used in a year. Install all updates. Now go here: http://www.filehippo.com/updatechecker/. Notice how many installers you need to download and run manually. Start up any arbitrarily old Linux distro and run an update. Notice how everything is up to date (note: By default, most distros don't give you the newest version of most software, but this is intentional and can be worked around by using a distro that doesn't suck).

Or you could just use Filehippo to take care of it on windows and be done with it. You can check daily, weekly, whatever, and it'll pop up a nice page in whatever browser you are using with 1 click links to any software that needs updates. pretty simple really.

you might be interested in something like this: http://www.filehippo.com/updatechecker/

Here are 2 better ones:

http://www.kcsoftwares.com/index.php?sumo
http://cleansofts.org/view/update-notifier.html

They are free too.

Where again do you do desktop zoom in windows to see that video fullscreen where the website prefers to surround it by ads?

Flash video? You can't unless they add it to the flash movie.

Or how do I control a window transparency with a key plus the mouse wheel, so that I can see the window behind it too?

You're going to need special programs for that. Maybe something from Stardock.

Is it possible at all to choose which windows remain 'always on top' or 'always on bottom'?

Always has been. But it doesn't stick if you close the program.

Oh, and what shady buggy shareware do I need to get multiple desktops, and why can't I assign my own keyboard shortcuts to switch around them?

You mean workspaces, right? You can already get multiple desktops with ease, but your cursor will slide right off the side onto another.

Why can't I run a program on one computer and let it display on another?

Because it's not a feature of the OS? Actually, Remote Desktop is, but you wouldn't want to use that except over gigabit. ;)

When I start a big program that takes a couple of seconds to start, and I go to the 'start' menu to start another program before the first one opens, then why does windows think it's a good idea to suddenly remove the menu where I'm trying to lookup that other program, just because the first program got far enough to open its first window?

Oh! This is a major peeve of mine. Especially when installers are going on in the background, constantly starting new exe's. You can go into the start menu a dozen times, and it closes almost immediately over and over. :P

But Ubuntu doesn't seem to be much better - at least 9.04 isn't.

Why, after logging in, when it looks on the screen that the computer is ready for me, does the mouse pointer still blink/flash and not let me actually do usefull things while the only thing happening is the harddrive light being on and the junk bar on the bottom getting larger and larger.

Turn off the junk. :P Or get an SSD. My computer from 2003 goes from boot menu to XP desktop in 6 seconds - then another ~12 to finish loading stuff. The trick is not having any crap running. This is approximately twice as fast as Ubuntu on the same computer.

Why does every program inform me in a different way that it has an update, or wants to check online for updates, and why do I need to reboot that often for that?

Reboots for updates have always annoyed me. Maybe this will relieve some of your stress.

What is 'fast web search', why does it hyjack my browser and make everything slower and how did it get in there, and how do I get rid of it? (repeat for dozens more spyware/adware).

Doesn't really apply to most slashdot readers. I haven't gotten any spyware since the first computer I built... and I'm pretty lax about keeping things up to date.

What is an adware scanner anyway? And why do I still need a virus scanner band-aid in the 21st century? Shouldn't that OS problem be actually solved by now?

Microsoft chose moronic default security settings with XP. If you lack a hardware router, your computer will literally be infected within 10 seconds. :/

Why did my webcam suddenly stop working after a windows update, and why do the Microsoft help pages do nothing more than ask me if their advice helped, instead of actually helping?

So, so true! The number of broken webcams I see has been climbing a lot recently. :P

Why can't I print a photo on my HP printer with the software that came with windows without it complaining abou

Most programs do have such update features. The question is more how well they work.

When people bring me computers needing a tuneup, usually they have Adobe Reader 8.1.0, Java 1.6.5 to 15 (not 18, the newest), and Flash 10.x (Congrats, Flash. Now if only you had less vulnerabilities)

This is despite them having auto-updaters. Multiple reboots leads to no prompts. Why aren't the updaters working? No idea - at first.

At that point I'll check winver and note it's an XP SP2 machine. After updating to XP SP3, suddenly they all work.

If anyone is having issues managing updates, you might be interested in something like this: http://www.filehippo.com/updatechecker/

My machine has 3.0.0 installed, but I deleted the installation files and have no copy anywhere.

I can't uninstall 3.0.0 without the installation files, and there doesn't appear to be anywhere to download them.

The new version won't install until I uninstall the old version.

Looks like I'll be using 3.0.0 forever.

Download it here. They have every release and release candidate going back to 1.1.5.

Well I have had it replace the Task Manager on this XP Home box for a couple of months now, went to check the about and found it was 11.30 (so no updating) and went and downloaded the 10.2 from Filehippo (the "secret showing" one) and other than the fonts being shitty on 10.2 I didn't find any difference in processes nor memory. Considering there are more than a dozen things you can watch under the memory heading (private bytes, working set etc) maybe he just is looking at different columns on the two?

Considering how many guys play with sysinternals and would just looooove to find something hinky going on with MSFT I'm gonna have to call bullshit without screenshots. It isn't like there aren't a ton of places to host pics on the net, and if it really is hiding processes then he shouldn't need a full clean install to show us this. But I tried both 10.2 and 11.30 and found no updating and no differences other than fonts on 3 different machines, XP Home, XP Pro, Windows 7.

Funny that the link you provided is comprised ENTIRELY of mirrors for sites that no longer have v10.20 available. Many of those mirrors were dead. The only versions that were available there are v9.3 (very old version with many of the functions of 10.20 missing) and v10.21, the first MS version.

So now it's *too* old ? You should have been more specific in the first place, Goldilocks.

Thanks for lending some credence to my original post. You simply validated my assertion that MS has pulled as many old versions from the web as they could possibly get away with.

The very first Google result for "Process Explorer 10.2" takes you a site you can download it from.

Funny that the link you provided is comprised ENTIRELY of mirrors for sites that no longer have v10.20 available. Many of those mirrors were dead. The only versions that were available there are v9.3 (very old version with many of the functions of 10.20 missing) and v10.21, the first MS version.

So now it's *too* old ? You should have been more specific in the first place, Goldilocks.

Thanks for lending some credence to my original post. You simply validated my assertion that MS has pulled as many old versions from the web as they could possibly get away with.

The very first Google result for "Process Explorer 10.2" takes you a site you can download it from.

Uhhhhh...Anonymous Dude? We actually have that in Windows too you know, it is just like everything else in Windows in that you need a third party tool. My guess is if MSFT tried to add it natively they would get screams of antitrust! and be accused of playing favorites if it detected Adobe but not Bob's Media Player.

But it works from 98-Windows 7, only takes one click, unless you have it start with Windows then you don't have to click at all unless it finds something out of date. Just use ninite to install the software you need on a clean machine, along with Update checker afterward once a week (or day if you are paranoid) and voila! Easy Peasy Windows.

that still only offers the beta 4 release. i found i had to go elsewhere to download the release candidate directly.
like...http://www.filehippo.com/download_firefox/

I agree with your assertion that it's a problem for the industry as a whole. In terms of products for home users the market is really sparse, and I don't like having to hassle through any of the stuff either, even on the enterprise side.

A quick google of "update checker" brought up this result: http://www.filehippo.com/updatechecker/

Sounds like that might help some. I haven't tried it but running that once a month, then hitting Windows Update would probably keep your bases covered pretty well.

Anyhow, I'm not disputing that the situation sucks, but I am disputing the notion that there aren't ways to address patching. Cheap? No. Available? Yes.

Friends don't let friends run Windows without CCleaner.

Not to mention most DVDs are encrypted and many DVDs are damaged in creative ways to try to prevent people from copying them.

Never had a problem with DVD Decrypter (you can download from FileHippo). Just take care to turn off 'check for program update' in the settings on DVD Decrypter (MacroVision owns the original domains now so there won't be any more updates anyway). Also, check out Handbrake for your format conversion and shrinking needs. You may also find the guides over on Doom9 to be useful. Good luck and cheers mate.

The KMPlayer is also quite decent (not to be confused with KDE's KMPlayer). I find it plays pretty much any format just fine, it has a plethora of options, and it seems compatible with most hardware (using the right adjustments, if required).

The problem is when every Tom, Dick, and Harry software company decides they need an update client of their own. "Small enough" times a few dozen stops being so small. Plus, the odds that any one client is buggy or insecure goes up by the same factor. We are talking about daemons running 24x7 that can remotely fetch and execute arbitrary code here.

Exactly. I personally use FileHippo's thingy.

As Microsoft seems unable to build a basic update checker in, it's up to third parties.

Three words: FileHippo's Update Checker.

I would really like the ability to disable all applications checking for newer versions. I check almost my entire system for newer versions on my own schedule.