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Domain: tomsmithonline.com
Stories and comments across the archive that link to tomsmithonline.com.
Comments · 22
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Re: They have retconned massive amounts of technol
To quote Tom Smith. . .
It's just a temporal shift --
We try explaining it, but just-can't-get-it-right!
Break out the techno-babble --
It's Science Fiction Lite!
Ignore the stuff you kno-o-o-ow --
This stuff'll rot your bray-ay-ay-ay-ay-ain!
Let's do the Time Plot again!
Let's do the Time Plot again! -
OBLG: Tom Smith Song
Far too true:
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Beware The Wiki Pirates
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Re:Neutron Beam... Beer!
There's many drinks you'll drink, me lads, on every world that's new.
There's Saurian Brandy, Cranapple Schnapps, and a good old Tullamore Don't.
There's Busch and Beck and Bud and Bock and others dark and pale,
But I think you'll find the finest kind is Three-Oh-Seven Ale.
(chorus)
Three-Oh-Seven Ale, me lads, Three-Oh-Seven Ale,
The finest drink that any bar has ever had for sale,
It'll lay your whole damn world to waste, it'll make you fit and hale,
There's nothing that you'll ever taste like Three-Oh-Seven Ale, me lads,
Three-Oh-Seven Ale.
It started out at M.I.T. one lazy summer day,
When a couple of the frat-boy techies started in to play,
They'd caught up on their schedule with a couple hours to kill,
So they fitted up the cyclotron and made themselves a still.
(chorus)
They added choice ingredients to brew a little brew,
But they didn't know the wires were crossed in Chamber Number Two.
A tiny bit of space got folded, things were looking queer --
They turned the spout and then came out the world's first Hyper-Beer.
(chorus)
It bubbled and it burbled and it glowed a fizzly green,
And what it did to test equipment, frankly, was obscene.
It took awhile to find a vial it wouldn't burst to flame,
Then they measured out its potency, and that's how it was named.
(slower)
There's many drinks you'll drink, me lads, but this one beats them all:
One hundred fifty-three and one-half percent alcohol,
A beer, brewed in a tesseract, that'll shoot you through the roof --
And if you don't believe me, I've got lots and lots of proof.
(final chorus)
Three-Oh-Seven Ale, me lads, Three-Oh-Seven Ale,
The finest drink that any bar has ever had for sale,
It'll lay your whole damn world to waste, it'll make you fit and hale,
It sticks to your mouth like library paste,
With a stronger kick than toxic waste,
There's nothing that you'll ever taste
Like Three-Oh-Seven Ale!
(Words and Music: © 1989 by Tom Smith: http://www.tomsmithonline.com/lyrics/307_ale.htm) -
307 Ale!
"They added choice ingredients to brew a little brew,
But they didn't know the wires were crossed in Chamber Number Two.
A tiny bit of space got folded, things were looking queer --
They turned the spout and then came out the world's first Hyper-Beer." -
Re:What about the yeast?
My favorite high alcohol beer is 307 ale. It is 153.5% alcohol, and a great drinking song.
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Favorite TLAPD song
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I got transylvania U and saw this.
Mucho Appopriate for slashdot: http://www.tomsmithonline.com/freestuff/oddio/Final-IFoughtTheTroll.mp3
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Must be graduates of Trans Poly U.
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Must be graduates of Trans Poly U.
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Re:MPAA needs to stop illegal downloading?
>I wonder what else they need in order to enforce laws. Prisons? Armed agents? The power to arrest and seize property?
There's a wonderful song by Tom Smith http://tomsmithonline.com/lyrics/illuminati_polka. htm that shows where this MAY be leading when it says "The entertainment industry just got the Aton Bomb".
The song was written, by the way, as a sort of tribute to Steve Jackson, whose name is legendary in the fight for individual rights in the digital age.
Are we paranoid yet? If not, maybe we should be! -
Don't forget the official Theme Song...
Written and performed by Tom Smith, the official Talk Like a Pirate Day Theme Song... in mp3 format, with lyrics.
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Don't forget the official Theme Song...
Written and performed by Tom Smith, the official Talk Like a Pirate Day Theme Song... in mp3 format, with lyrics.
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Best parody song/video EVER
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Best parody song/video EVER
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Re:Can you hear me now?
"wouldn't be anywhere near as polarized as it is now."
Polarized? How so?
I'm beginning to think that, instead of talking about Red and Blue states, we should discuss Purple and Green states*. Really, the only thing the candidates seem to say consistently is "I'm not the other guy! He's a Republican/Democrat and I'm a Democrat/Republican!"
I can see it now... "Who takes blue is Democrat, follows Democrat candidate. Who takes cloth for Democrat candidate is Democrat candidate. Democracts follow Democrat candidate!"
*(A certain St. Patrick's Day song has now been forever ruined for me...) -
"The Return of the King, Uh-huh"You mean you're not familiar with the Tom Smith filksong by that title?
It's even available on one of Tom's tapes.
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"The Return of the King, Uh-huh"You mean you're not familiar with the Tom Smith filksong by that title?
It's even available on one of Tom's tapes.
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This is called...There used to be a band of wives and girlfriends of Cern physicists called Les Horribles Cernettes.
Yes, they are. They were performing at the Ignobel awards recently.
BTW - there are many many people performing works like this - I have several (purchased) CDs full of such songs, and I write them all the time. The larger set of music devoted to Science, Science Fiction, subculture and such is called "Filk". Do a google search for "Filk", and you'll find loads of stuff out there. Some Filk is set to original music, some to tradional music, and others to modern music (for instance, my song "Fibonacci ( Oh, one one, two three five eiiiight)" is set to the tune of the 80's song "Jenny (867-5309)"). Most of my Filk (as most out there is) is about Science Fiction from the popular (I have a Neon Genesis Evangelion Filk, a few Klingon Filks, etc) to the obscure (I did a filk about Sadie Corrie's Transylvanian, a background character in the Rocky Horror Picture Show), to the moving (Julia Ecklar's The Phoenix is a wonderful, heart jerking tribute to exploration, and Leslie Fish's Hope Eyrie is incredible).
Check it out if you haven't seen it. I'd recommend Tom Smith as a good starting point, other than the simple Google search.
--
Evan "But the Eagle has landed; tell your children when \ Time won't drive us down to dust again." E. -
What to do with amusing spam... (slightly OT)
mst3k it.
This has some very amusing stuff under the "Mystery Usenet Theater 3000" section. -
Credit Cards...
As far as things like this are concerned, I'm not really a big fan of Credit Card Companies... I would much prefer to use something like PayByCheck.com, much as Tom Smith does. They charge you less, and more people can buy your product. Sounds like a good deal to me.
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Hehehe... Lyrics explained.
For those who may not know, this is a brilliant parody of the geekish 307 Ale by Tom Smith, the world's fastest Filker. Filk can be described as parody songs in the same sense that coding can be descibed as hitting keys. It's a subculture often found in the wee hours at SF conventions.Here's the original lyrics, and I recommend his album wholeheartedly to any
307 Ale, by Tom Smith
There's many drinks you'll drink, me lads, on every world that's new.
There's Saurian Brandy, Cranapple Schnapps, and a good old Tullamore Don't.
There's Busch and Beck and Bud and Bock and others dark and pale,
But I think you'll find the finest kind is Three-Oh-Seven Ale.
(chorus)
Three-Oh-Seven Ale, me lads, Three-Oh-Seven Ale,
The finest drink that any bar has ever had for sale,
It'll lay your whole damn world to waste, it'll make you fit and hale,
There's nothing that you'll ever taste like Three-Oh-Seven Ale, me lads,
Three-Oh-Seven Ale.
It started out at M.I.T. one lazy summer day,
When a couple of the frat-boy techies started in to play,
They'd caught up on their schedule with a couple hours to kill,
So they fitted up the cyclotron and made themselves a still.
(chorus)
They added choice ingredients to brew a little brew,
But they didn't know the wires were crossed in Chamber Number Two.
A tiny bit of space got folded, things were looking queer --
They turned the spout and then came out the world's first Hyper-Beer.
(chorus)
It bubbled and it burbled and it glowed a fizzly green,
And what it did to test equipment, frankly, was obscene.
It took awhile to find a vial it wouldn't burst to flame,
Then they measured out its potency, and that's how it was named.
(slower)
There's many drinks you'll drink, me lads, but this one beats them all:
One hundred fifty-three and one-half percent alcohol,
A beer, brewed in a tesseract, that'll shoot you through the roof --
And if you don't believe me, I've got lots and lots of proof.
(final chorus)
Three-Oh-Seven Ale, me lads, Three-Oh-Seven Ale,
The finest drink that any bar has ever had for sale,
It'll lay your whole damn world to waste, it'll make you fit and hale,
It sticks to your mouth like library paste,
With a stronger kick than toxic waste,
There's nothing that you'll ever taste
Like Three-Oh-Seven Ale!
-- Evan