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A laudable project indeed. However everytime I look at that "UNdata" project name, I can't help but think of it as a data source for Uncyclopedia.

At least he isn't huffing them.

He was probably looking for an excuse to search your car for drugs.

Don't run crack.exe (it's a trojan).

Why in the name of everything vile and evil would you want your computer on crack? I mean come on, even your mom wouldn't let her computer do crack!

"Why you be lookin' up crack in da uncyclopedia when you can have yo PC on crack? I gots da best crack dey is, I have you computer in a two hunnat dolla a day habit, my crack so good! Sheeit!"

I hope you're at least using a firewall... or a Mac.

Don't run crack.exe (it's a trojan).

Why in the name of everything vile and evil would you want your computer on crack? I mean come on, even your mom wouldn't let her computer do crack!

"Why you be lookin' up crack in da uncyclopedia when you can have yo PC on crack? I gots da best crack dey is, I have you computer in a two hunnat dolla a day habit, my crack so good! Sheeit!"

I hope you're at least using a firewall... or a Mac.

Truth is rare on wikipedia, the articles there prove nothing -- other than how easy people will believe in information that basically looks correct, even when it's rarely no more than a pile of badly-written lies.

How true! I personally prefer the Uncyclopedia, and it says Igor Sikorsky doesn't exist. Oh wait, here he is, apparently he changed his name to "Smith". Hell, if I had a Russian name during the cold war I'd change it to "Smith" too!

Ignore that nonsense on Wikipedia, Uncyclopedia is way more accurate.

Truth is rare on wikipedia, the articles there prove nothing -- other than how easy people will believe in information that basically looks correct, even when it's rarely no more than a pile of badly-written lies.

How true! I personally prefer the Uncyclopedia, and it says Igor Sikorsky doesn't exist. Oh wait, here he is, apparently he changed his name to "Smith". Hell, if I had a Russian name during the cold war I'd change it to "Smith" too!

Ignore that nonsense on Wikipedia, Uncyclopedia is way more accurate.

Truth is rare on wikipedia, the articles there prove nothing -- other than how easy people will believe in information that basically looks correct, even when it's rarely no more than a pile of badly-written lies.

How true! I personally prefer the Uncyclopedia, and it says Igor Sikorsky doesn't exist. Oh wait, here he is, apparently he changed his name to "Smith". Hell, if I had a Russian name during the cold war I'd change it to "Smith" too!

Ignore that nonsense on Wikipedia, Uncyclopedia is way more accurate.

Truth is rare on wikipedia, the articles there prove nothing -- other than how easy people will believe in information that basically looks correct, even when it's rarely no more than a pile of badly-written lies.

How true! I personally prefer the Uncyclopedia, and it says Igor Sikorsky doesn't exist. Oh wait, here he is, apparently he changed his name to "Smith". Hell, if I had a Russian name during the cold war I'd change it to "Smith" too!

Ignore that nonsense on Wikipedia, Uncyclopedia is way more accurate.

Did you know...

• ...that the eleventh secret herb and spice is LSD?
  
• ...that John Cage has never made silence sound more golden?
  
• ...that you can always pay your credit card bills using your credit card?
  
• ...that air guitars are similar in shape to normal guitars, with the notable difference that they are made entirely out of air?
  
• ...that Sperm are like hippies: they all stink, all of them are the same, but we can't just have enough of them?
  
• ...that the Bavarian Illuminati used "That's what she said" as a secret code? No one knows exactly which she they were referring to, as they were a very sexist organization and had vowed collectively forsake the female species. Go figure.

Ok, so you got this car, see, and it's flying around the moon... what? You people don't have flying cars yet?

Well sorry guys, you're just too primitive to understand REAL physics. Come back when you figure out where you're going to keep all the necessary penguins.

What? You don't even know about the penguins? Shocking! You'll never reach lightspeed the way you're going.

-Al Facentuari

The Earth's climate changes in response to external forcing, including variations in its orbit around the Sun (orbital forcing),[13][14][15] volcanic eruptions,[16] and atmospheric greenhouse gas concentrations. The detailed causes of the recent warming remain an active field of research, but the scientific consensus[17][18] is that the increase in atmospheric greenhouse gases due to human activity caused most of the warming observed since the start of the industrial era. This attribution is clearest for the most recent 50 years, for which the most detailed data are available. Some other hypotheses departing from the consensus view have been suggested to explain the temperature increase. One such hypothesis proposes that warming may be the result of variations in solar activity.[19][20][21]

None of the effects of forcing are instantaneous. The thermal inertia of the Earth's oceans and slow responses of other indirect effects mean that the Earth's current climate is not in equilibrium with the forcing imposed. Climate commitment studies indicate that even if greenhouse gases were stabilized at 2000 levels, a further warming of about 0.5 C (0.9 F) would still occur.[22]

Well, I see where you got your information!

I found a picture of the dark matter! Or... well hell it might be a black hole. Oh wait...

I found a picture of the dark matter! Or... well hell it might be a black hole. Oh wait...

If you two don't knock it off I'll huff this kitten. So help me, I will!

Now you two go outside and finish doing whatever you're good at.

Damned kids. Get off of my lawn!

If you two don't knock it off I'll huff this kitten. So help me, I will!

Now you two go outside and finish doing whatever you're good at.

Damned kids. Get off of my lawn!

If you two don't knock it off I'll huff this kitten. So help me, I will!

Now you two go outside and finish doing whatever you're good at.

Damned kids. Get off of my lawn!

If you two don't knock it off I'll huff this kitten. So help me, I will!

Now you two go outside and finish doing whatever you're good at.

Damned kids. Get off of my lawn!

nerd also nurd (nûrd) Pronunciation Key
n. Slang
1. A foolish, inept, or unattractive person.
2. A person who is single-minded or accomplished in scientific or technical pursuits but is felt to be socially inept.

nerd'y adj.

Word History: The word nerd, undefined but illustrated, first appeared in 1950 in Dr. Seuss's If I Ran the Zoo: "And then, just to show them, I'll sail to Ka-Troo And Bring Back an It-Kutch a Preep and a Proo A Nerkle a Nerd and a Seersucker, too!" (The nerd is a small humanoid creature looking comically angry, like a thin, cross Chester A. Arthur.) Nerd next appears, with a gloss, in the February 10, 1957, issue of the Glasgow, Scotland, Sunday Mail in a regular column entitled "ABC for SQUARES": "Nerd--a square, any explanation needed?" Many of the terms defined in this "ABC" are unmistakable Americanisms, such as hep, ick, and jazzy, as is the gloss "square," the current meaning of nerd. The third appearance of nerd in print is back in the United States in 1970 in Current Slang: "Nurd [sic], someone with objectionable habits or traits.... An uninteresting person, a 'dud.'" Authorities disagree on whether the two nerds--Dr. Seuss's small creature and the teenage slang term in the Glasgow Sunday Mail--are the same word. Some experts claim there is no semantic connection and the identity of the words is fortuitous. Others maintain that Dr. Seuss is the true originator of nerd and that the word nerd ("comically unpleasant creature") was picked up by the five- and six-year-olds of 1950 and passed on to their older siblings, who by 1957, as teenagers, had restricted and specified the meaning to the most comically obnoxious creature of their own class, a "square."

Nerd is a term often bearing a derogatory connotation or stereotype, that refers to a person who passionately pursues intellectual activities, esoteric knowledge, or other obscure interests that are age inappropriate rather than engaging in more social or popular activities. Therefore, a nerd is often excluded from physical activity and considered a loner by peers.

I PITY THE FOO' THAT DOESN'T FIX THIS CRAP!"
Someone help this sucka of a page by rewriting it.
And make it drink its milk too. Only then can it join The A-Team

Whoops! Maybe you were looking for HowTo:Get Laid?

"Roses are #FF0000, Violets are #0000FF, All my base are belong to you!"
~ Some Male Nerd on How to pick up female nerds

"Lemme in through ur tunnel frm de undrgrond, aka ur C drive :P, alrite, l8r."
~ An Average Male Nerd on How to pick up your nerdy friends computers

"In Soviet Russia, nerds hate YOU!!"
~ Russian reversal on nerds

A nerd (homo intelligencia, floro sapiens, virginus nerdius, or "homo supa smarcia") is a member of an odd species known for its love of 'puters, bad fashion sense, and inability to communicate with members of the opposite sex. While some lucky individuals are born nerds, the rest of us have to make an effort to evolve into nerds.

Well YAY! That means I don't have to RTFA, so I'm still not new here!

But for those who actually did RTFA, if TFA said that then it was written by someone stupid, ignorant, or both. How can you take anything it says seriously? Can anybody point to a FA from a less developmentally disabled author?

And we all know that Nader is going to run another, "Both parties are the same even though they vote the opposite" campaign.

Perhaps he and his supporters expect *every* Democrat to vote the same on *every* issue? Because that's usually what his campaign speeches come down to. Never mind that the vast majority of Democrats, on a given issue, side with him, and that compromises are almost always made only due to pressure from Republicans. No, because all don't fall in lockstep with his views, both parties are clearly the same.

First amendment.

Any law that attempts to regulate speech will be shot down. Or at least, SHOULD BE shot down (but with the esteemed members of the US Supreme Court these days, who knows what could happen? After all, they ruled that "limited" means whatever Congress says it means.

I wish I could have my country back. This isn't the same place I grew up in.

"The day Microsoft makes something that doesn't suck is the day they make a vacuum cleaner."
~ Oscar Wilde on Microsoft

"In the case of Microsoft software, nobody knows, what is a bug and what is a marketing strategy"
~ Unknown User

"Nonsense, that's just an optical illusion! Aren't we great!"
~ Miscrosoft on the Red Ring of Death

"PEICE OF SHIT!!! SON OF A BITCH MICROSOFT CRASHED AGAIN!!"
~ Mother Teresa on Microsoft

"Cannot find REALITY.SYS...Universe Halted."
~ God on phone with Microsoft Customer Support

"You've got questions. We've got dancing paperclips."
~ Microsoft on In need of assistance

"Microsoft Anti-Virus software had a stroke of genius. They give you some free samples of viruses!"
~ Bill Gates, Head of the SS

"Buy our new ShitoSoft FK, for all your incontinental needs!"
~ Bill Gates, Head of the SS

"Does anyone know how to reverse the calibration on the leggimonitoner and change the halter on the second flartion of the JCU cable while simultaneously ordering 30 pounds of chicken nuggets by whispering to the graphics card? Me neither."
~ The guy who invented the Automatic Transmission on Microsoft and all things in general

"Where do you want to go today?" Evidently, Gates lacked the foresight to realise one cannot go far without a ticket...If you have more than six hundred and sixty six brain cells and don't want to enter hell, the religious nutcakes at Conservapedia have written an article about Microsoft.Micro$$$oft (formerly known as Magma, ltd and the translation from German of micro schaft, literally meaning small penis and international communist bureau of the Holy See) is the name of a now defunct software company coined by Jeff Metz and his first wife. Since its incorporation it has distributed duct tape, wombats, cinnamon, toilet rolls, Donald Trump, turnips, syphilis and horn-rimmed spectacles to numerous international markets. It has also had a minor role in the computer industry. The opposite of Microsoft is Megahard.

Two pilots are flying their helicopter along when all of a sudden a thick blanket of fog appears out of knowhere. The pilot fly's to a nearby building and holds up a sign saying 'Where are we?'. A person in a nearby window writes on a piece of paper 'here'. The pilot is then able to find himself on the map and fly home. An amazed co-pilot asks him how he knew, to which is reply is "It had to be the microsoft building, While technically correct, the answer was a load of bullshit."

My head just asploded. But then it unploded when I realised your last name isn't "Dent".

Dude, you know wikipedia isn't accurate. If you want and article about zombies, go here.

Does this mean the expat's in Miami will finally shut up

The expat's what? And which expat are you referring to?

Or do you simply not know when and wnen not to use an apostrophe? Go see Bob, he'll fix you up.

-mcgrew

(Eye muss bee knew hear?)

Wow. Shows how passionate slashdotters are about this. "That's just fucking retarded" in any thread about any subject usually garners either a -1 flamebait or -1 offtopic, and this one is +5 insightful.

What worries me is I agree with the mods here.

OK, this is only marginally on topic (but WTF it may be FP so it will get modded offtopic or redundant anyway) but the words "Free Content" mande me think of the content-free encyclopedia.

For those of us who care.

I should say something about the actual topic but...

OK, this is only marginally on topic (but WTF it may be FP so it will get modded offtopic or redundant anyway) but the words "Free Content" mande me think of the content-free encyclopedia.

For those of us who care.

I should say something about the actual topic but...

In Soviet Russia, worm patches YOU!

Hot Grits

But does it run Lin OUCH!

Imagine a beowlf cluster of OW! OW! OK I'LL STOP!!!

In Soviet Russia, worm patches YOU!

Hot Grits

But does it run Lin OUCH!

Imagine a beowlf cluster of OW! OW! OK I'LL STOP!!!

Or worse, Sony?

I couldn't find a wikipedia link to cover this idea, but uncyclopedia has one.

-mcgrew

I just toss mine in the dishwasher. BTW, I see that's an orange one. The orange ones fuck you up real good.

That particlar piece of technology made me think of something else I read at the esteemed link above (on a different subject)- "Creak can be bought from both drug dealers and prostitutes. The difference is, the prostitute can wash her crack and sell it again."

Unfortunately somebody mutilated that particular article, removing the funniest parts (including the above quote) so I'll link this article instead.

I just toss mine in the dishwasher. BTW, I see that's an orange one. The orange ones fuck you up real good.

That particlar piece of technology made me think of something else I read at the esteemed link above (on a different subject)- "Creak can be bought from both drug dealers and prostitutes. The difference is, the prostitute can wash her crack and sell it again."

Unfortunately somebody mutilated that particular article, removing the funniest parts (including the above quote) so I'll link this article instead.

A Black hole is an impossible object which makes the Universe work. It has the useful property of being "undetectable". It's like when your spouse comes home with a dent in the car, and blames it on an invisible black mass; the dent is proof of the black mass, but you can't, and never will be able to see it with CCTV cameras, but you know it's there. "Dark matter" is an equally undetectable force that causes cars to defy gravity, and hit invisible black holes. Astronomers will tell you that lots of them have spouses with dents in their cars, and can explain this is very technical terms, so you won't be able to understand why it's not possible.

What puritan modded that insightful comment as "funny?" I'll show you funny. Oh, sorry, I forgot. You want this.

-mcgrew

In Soviet slashdot, joke laughs at YOU
THAT SNOT FUNNY DAMMIT!

What puritan modded that insightful comment as "funny?" I'll show you funny. Oh, sorry, I forgot. You want this.

-mcgrew

In Soviet slashdot, joke laughs at YOU
THAT SNOT FUNNY DAMMIT!

Really? How many real terrorists have you seen?

Lets see, Walmart, McDonald's, R J Reynolds, the DEA, Other US police agencies, the Justice Department (the linked AP article doesn't say shit about anybody being prosecuted for waterboarding)... how many more do you need?

-mcgrew

Really? How many real terrorists have you seen?

Lets see, Walmart, McDonald's, R J Reynolds, the DEA, Other US police agencies, the Justice Department (the linked AP article doesn't say shit about anybody being prosecuted for waterboarding)... how many more do you need?

-mcgrew

Really? How many real terrorists have you seen?

Lets see, Walmart, McDonald's, R J Reynolds, the DEA, Other US police agencies, the Justice Department (the linked AP article doesn't say shit about anybody being prosecuted for waterboarding)... how many more do you need?

-mcgrew

Really? How many real terrorists have you seen?

Lets see, Walmart, McDonald's, R J Reynolds, the DEA, Other US police agencies, the Justice Department (the linked AP article doesn't say shit about anybody being prosecuted for waterboarding)... how many more do you need?

-mcgrew

people in their student years are always trying different things out. It's hard for older people to take them seriously sometimes

How can you take someone seriously when they're listening to rap and have stupid permanent marks all over themselves? How can you take a man wearing earrings seriously?

You know why it's hard to take youth seriously. If you're twenty, how easy is it to tale a five year old seriously? I mean come on, he's got a boogger hanging from his nose and a frog in his pocket.

Once when I was about seven or eight there were a group of adults trying to figure out how to do something or other, and the solution was obvious. I kept trying to give them the answer and they kept shushing me. After a few hours they came to the same conclucions themselves.

I try to keep that in mind when I'm talking to some kid with a piercing that looks like he's got a booger hanging from his nose.

-mcgrew

Ha! You fell for it! Now give me all your mod points or this kitten gets huffed!

You know I'll do it, too.

-mcgrew

Just wanted to let you know that you used Proof by Outside the scope. I could have proven you wrong using Proof by Promiscuity, but I want to keep my geek license.

Just wanted to let you know that you used Proof by Outside the scope. I could have proven you wrong using Proof by Promiscuity, but I want to keep my geek license.

And here's the link

You didn't supply a link.

Comcast
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
Jump to: navigation, search
    This article may be Overly American. Brits may not understand humor, only humour. Don't change a thing to remedy this.

The red C of Comcast, along with the name of both the religion and the god, Comcast

"No block sync? No problem!"
~ The Comcast.net AI Chatbot on Home Networking

Comcast (formely Comca$$$t)is a monotheistic religion in which the only god is Comcast. A company that has a name rhyming with Comcast is known for its game show Jack My Price Up.

Also, I suggest you check out the Veropedia.

I prefer the uncyclopedia. I mean, neither Britannica nor Wikipedia have articles about asplosions.