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Get Your New Handheld...in Butter.

Wow. That's about all I can say to the 50 pound PDA made out of butter currently on eBay. Obviously, the Dairy Council got to them.

42 of 167 comments (clear)

  1. Great! by xiangpeng · · Score: 4, Funny

    great, now i need to keep my PDA below 30C.

    --
    You must defeat Sheng Long to stand a chance.
    1. Re:Great! by ackthpt · · Score: 2, Funny
      great, now i need to keep my PDA below 30C.


      And either way it's frozen, must be all that cholesterol in the wiring...

      --

      A feeling of having made the same mistake before: Deja Foobar
    2. Re:Great! by Hilary+Rosen · · Score: 2

      Yeah, but think how high you could overclock it..

      --
      Yes, the nick is flamebait
  2. Hrm.. by Bob+McCown · · Score: 5, Funny

    I can't believe its not Palm!

    1. Re:Hrm.. by The_Messenger · · Score: 5, Funny

      That was a only a margarinely funny joke!

      --

      --
      I like to watch.

    2. Re:Hrm.. by linuxpng · · Score: 2

      Spray...........
      Have to add text on for the damn lameness filter

  3. What's scarier by Traicovn · · Score: 3, Insightful

    I don't know which is weirder. The fact that someone actually made this and is selling it on ebay, the fact that someone has actually placed a bid on it, or the fact that it made it to slashdot. I think my favorite things to see sold on ebay yet though were people who were selling their virginity, or their souls. Even if you never buy anything off ebay, it's fun just to type in some random word and see what comes up.
    Anyone know the freshness date on the butter palm? Or maybe the butter palm is for people who have butter for their hands and are always dropping their palm-pilot/cellphone :)

    --

    [Something witty and intelligent should have appeared here.]
    {Traicovn}
    1. Re:What's scarier by Traicovn · · Score: 2, Funny

      Thought of a good advertising campaign
      It melts in your mouth, and in your Palm &copy

      --

      [Something witty and intelligent should have appeared here.]
      {Traicovn}
    2. Re:What's scarier by ptomblin · · Score: 4, Interesting

      For those of us too lazy to try and think up a good search term for finding weird stuff on ebay, there is always http://www.whowouldbuythat.com

      --
      The next Cmdr Taco duplicate will be ready soon, but subscribers can beat the rush and see it early!
  4. Misunderstanding by Dr.+Dew · · Score: 4, Funny

    "...no, I told him I thought the latest Palm designs were cheesy!"

    Ahem.

  5. I mean really... by Outlet+of+Me · · Score: 5, Funny

    I've heard of greasing palms before, but this is ridiculous...

  6. only at the MN state fair... by MillMan · · Score: 4, Funny

    As soon as I read this I knew there was only one place in the world where this would be done, the Minnesota state fair. Every year there is a "beauty contest" and the winner along with the runners up get a butter sculpture in the likeness of their head (the winner represents the Minnesota dairy industry). So now there are a number of groups around who do things like this. I didn't expect people to try and make money off of it, though.

    1. Re:only at the MN state fair... by Rupert · · Score: 2

      Princess Kay of the Milky Way is not a beauty pageant.

      Of course, the winner is never particularly ugly, but the cow-handling requirements keep most of the Miss America types out of the running.

      --

      --
      E_NOSIG
    2. Re:only at the MN state fair... by jejones · · Score: 2

      No, not only the Minnesota State Fair. This year at the Iowa State Fair, there was, in addition to the traditional butter cow, a butter John Wayne. (In the past there's been a butter Elvis and a butter Garth Brooks.) I hope that Ms. Duffy Lyon, the sculptress who does the Iowa butter sculpture, will be a bit more high tech next year.

  7. Top Ten Lame Jokes about the Butter PDA by BobGregg · · Score: 5, Funny

    10. Gives a whole new meaning to "palm oil".
    9. Runs so smooth... it's like butter.
    8. Stupid character recognition... I wrote "butter", but all it will say is "Parkay".
    7. Gives a whole new meaning to "butter fingers".
    6. And to think, they said my computer would be no substitute for a girlfriend. Boy, were THEY wrong.
    5. First ever computer with a "best used by" date.
    4. Would you like your PDA salted or unsalted?
    3. Gives a whole new meaning to "memory churn".
    2. I think heat dissipation is going to be a problem.

    And the number 1, absolute LAMEST joke about the Butter PDA:

    1. I think I've milked this long enough.

  8. Re:Whats the point? by Tackhead · · Score: 4, Interesting
    > I see no reason anyone would want this. What are you supposed to do with it when you win?

    Buy a docking station made of 200 pounds of bread, with the bonus of never having to worry about static discharge destroying your PDA?

  9. Shipping? by wholesomegrits · · Score: 2, Insightful

    And if you win, how the hell do you ship something like this. The seller has neglected to include the most important nugget.

    What major shipping carrier will ship a 50lb chunk of butter with a promise not to melt it?

    Maybe this is more of a proof of concept thing -- to see if people really *will* buy any old shit on Ebay.

    --
    No sig is worth reading.
  10. Re:Yeah, but... by Traicovn · · Score: 2, Funny

    Yes, but you have to churn your own kernel, and you have to be careful if you overclock the cpu becuase it has to be kept in a cold room so that it doesn't overheat...

    --

    [Something witty and intelligent should have appeared here.]
    {Traicovn}
  11. Behold... by The+G · · Score: 2

    Behold the [processor] power of Cheese!
    --G

  12. I know where it came from! by Tackhead · · Score: 2, Funny

    Now we know what The Evil Business Guy Made Of Butter used for a PDA!

  13. The Butter PDA is a Fake! by jayhawk88 · · Score: 5, Funny

    Yes, that's right, it's a fake. Proof? Consider the following:

    - The picture shows the words "Palm VII x" across the top, but there is no antenna visible on the right side of the unit.

    - The unit itself seems to be out of proportion with real VII x's by nearly 7 millimeters width.

    - The "Login" button on the front screen is missing the "send information" icon (looks like waves moving out from a point) that is the staple of almost all Palm Portal online applications.

    - The front panel buttons seem to be positioned wrong. The real up and down buttons on VII x's are centered approximately 3.5 mm farther down.

    - The "cradle" this unit is sitting in is cleary missing the Palm logo on the front, as well as any visible HotSync button.

    - The entire unit seems to be yellow in color and made of butter. This may be a result of a bad picture, but real VII x's are made of plastic and are black in color, with the distinctive "Palm green" monochrome screen.

    Cleary this is the work of someone very skilled in Photoshop. I wonder if this is a retaliation by Palm after the recent FCC screwup with their new i705, to try and generate more interest in the VII x? Or perhaps it is the work of Palm-knockoff pirate organizations in Tailand or China, eager to flood the PDA hungry US market with cheap, imitation Palms.

  14. The best part... by glowingspleen · · Score: 3, Insightful

    The best part is that they actually put a RESERVE PRICE on it. As if it's got enough shelf life for them to really wait for the best price...for a CHARITY AUCTION no less. Bwhahaha...

  15. About the price... by mikeage · · Score: 2

    it's for charity. The money goes to 4H.. although the reserve is probably a little out of my budget.

    --
    -- Is "Sig" copyrighted by www.sig.com?
  16. OF COURSE somebody bid on it... by jeff.paulsen · · Score: 2

    ... at opening bid, that's 50 pounds of butter for 50 dollars. Have you checked your dairy case prices lately?

    --
    -- Jeff Paulsen
  17. Butter. by fobbman · · Score: 5, Funny

    "Rather than see the world's first, largest, and most beautiful, Butter PDA go to waste, we recognized the market demand for such an item [Emphasis personally added]and now offer it to the public in a charity auction."


    Who was polled in this market study, a tub of Parkay?


    Interviewer: "What sort of changes or enhancements would need to be made to handheld computers of today to make you more likely to purchase one in the future?"


    Small Plastic Tub: "Butter."


    Marketing Department: *ding*


  18. Homer says: by ocie · · Score: 2, Funny

    Marge: Homer, is that my good butter?
    Homer: Quiet Marge! I'm trying to work. And now to write another delicious memo.
    Mmmmmmmmm...memo.

    --
    JET Program: see Japan, meet intere
  19. this post gets in by Telek · · Score: 2

    and my story submissions about athlons and p4s and new hardware and comparisons don't get posted, and I never see any other stories about them either...

    if ( random(10) == 0 )
    accept_submission();
    else
    reject_submission();

    --

    If God gave us curiosity
    1. Re:this post gets in by CyberKnet · · Score: 2

      Actually, slashdot is written in perl so...

      if ($submit_count % 1000 = 0) { # one in one thousand
      accept_submission($submit_count);
      update_database($accept_random, $submit_count);
      } elseif ($submit_topic eq "interesting") {
      accept_submission($submit_count);
      update_database($accept, $submit_count);
      } else {
      reject_submission($submit_count);
      update_database($rejected, $submit_count);
      }

      --
      Video meliora proboque deteriora sequor - Ovidius
  20. I saw this at the MN State Fair by Rupert · · Score: 4, Interesting

    There is a business card for the sculptor in the case. It says he is immediately available. So next time I need a butter sculpture in a hurry, I'll know who to call. Or rather, I won't, because he wasn't beaming his card out of the butter PDA.

    ObOffTopic: it was right next to the Unisys booth. They were demoing an electronic voting system. plover and I both voted twice (if you remove the smart card from the reader after it authenticates you at the beginning of the transaction but before you complete it lets you vote again). I hear it's already installed in Florida.

    --

    --
    E_NOSIG
  21. This is... by carlos_benj · · Score: 5, Funny

    much butter than the one I'm using now. With the larger screen you can make notes in the margarine and not just the body of the document. And what a spread(sheet) application! Video scrolls very smoothly pasturize as you watch full screen MooPGs and PowerPint presentations.

    Many pundits have had a cow over this thing, some going so far as to declare it udderly ridiculous. Others believe it will saturate the market as readily as this reporter's pants and shirt. If the producers stick to their plans, this device should pound the competition within the next quart-er. Of course, that's provided they don't let this opportunity slip through their fingers. There is some concern about keeping up with demand and they may have to farm out some of the manufacturing to avoid a melt-down if things begin to heat up.

    --

    --

    As a matter of fact, I am a lawyer. But I play an actor on TV.

  22. Talk about corporate fat by schussat · · Score: 2
    Man, those lobbyists will do anything to grease the palms of industry.

    This kind of blatant merchandising really churns me up. I mean, you know they're skimming right off the top.

    -schussat

    --
    The hour of noon has passed. Let us go and get some Kentucky Fried Chicken.
  23. Economic realities by isomeme · · Score: 2

    We've known for some time that Palm and Handspring operated on razor-thin profit margarines.

    --
    When all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a skull.
  24. Re:Yeah, but... by M-G · · Score: 2, Funny

    Sure it can run Linux....it would just have to use a buttery kernel...

  25. Reserve price? by doorbot.com · · Score: 2

    Why is there a reserve price? It would be foolish for the seller to think they could make money selling a giant butter sculpture (let alone one that looks like a PDA). They should be trying as hard as they possibly can to get rid of it...

    Then there's the continual monetary drain due to needing to keep the sculpture refrigerated (who has a refrigerator that big?). They must pay someone to keep it refrigerated for them.

    If I were the seller, I'd have no reserve and a low "Buy Now" price. Come to think of it, if I were the seller, I never would have ended up with a fifty pound butter PDA in the first place.

  26. American Pie by macdaddy · · Score: 2

    This is just what that American Pie kid needs.

  27. It's Interesting, but not original... by Foggy+Tristan · · Score: 2, Funny

    but the Newton had a 70-lb shortening version about 6 years ago. It had difficulty with handwriting because of a faulty butter knife attachment.

    Prior to that, I understand NEC had managed to create a dried-apple head version of a cash register, but the disturbing pop-up No Sale key frightened young children.

    --
    Beware typoes.
    1. Re:It's Interesting, but not original... by Hilary+Rosen · · Score: 2

      Mod the parent up!

      It's the first thing I've read all day that made me laugh out loud.

      --
      Yes, the nick is flamebait
  28. not a fake. a facsimile by The_Rook · · Score: 2, Funny

    anyone can clearly see this particular butter palm is the non-fuctioning display demo they use in comp usa. the real butter palms are kept in a refrigerator under the counter.

    --
    when religion is no longer the opiate of the masses, governments will resort to real opiates.
  29. Top ten uses by Maskirovka · · Score: 2, Funny

    Pack some crackers around it, and present it as a snack tray at a Handspring developer's confrence.

    Lunch for my highschool gym teacher

    Pack a dozen m80s in the middle during the M$ presentation at comedex...

    Leave it in the hotel lobby at Defcon. Nuff said.

    Tell Condit there's a cute intern in the middle.

    Carve a Windows CE startup screen on it, and sacrifice at in a satanic ritual by slowly lowering it into the fire

    Feed it to the neighbor's rotweiler- Give em diarrea for life.

    It's for the children!

    Tell Micheal Jackson theres a little boy in the middle.

    Cowboy Neal

  30. Garth & Wayne? by Vuarnet · · Score: 2

    Butter John Wayne: Party on, Garth!
    Butter Garth Brooks: Party on, Wayne!

    (Easy karma... Ka-shing!)

    --
    Tongue-tied and twisted, just an earth-bound misfit, I
    Learning to fly, Pink Floyd.
  31. New York State Fair by Russ+Nelson · · Score: 3, Informative

    The New York State Fair has a butter sculpture every year. It's usually the size of a refrigerator. A couple of years ago, it *was* a refrigerator, with milk, eggs, and cheese in it. A couple of kids were stealing the chocolate milk out of it, and had spilled some.

    Yeah, and the whole thing was made out of butter.
    -russ

    --
    Don't piss off The Angry Economist
  32. 4-H by Russ+Nelson · · Score: 2

    Yup, 4-H needs your support. It's more than animals and plants. This year and last year my daughter (okay, so I'm bragging now--shoot me if I'm proud of my children) won the North/Central district public presentation contest. Last year was about paper-making and this was about Sheep to Shawl, past and present. Talked about how wool comes from sheep, yarn comes from wool, and sweaters come from wool.
    -russ

    --
    Don't piss off The Angry Economist