Slashdot Mirror


Jet Lag: 2 Reviews Of "The One"

If the Matrix successfully fused sci-fi, film noir and martial arts movies, maybe The One will end the shameless, non-stop ripoffs of the martial arts/ balletic combat sequences Neo brought to the big screen for the mass audience. This movie features not one but two Jet Li's, from parallel dimensions (sound familiar?), drop-kicking one another all over the galaxy, and both are stupefyingly boring. People who dodge bullets in slo-mo are getting to be so commonplace they're tiresome. And while we're at it, isn't it high time, so long as we're zipping people around via particle beams, to find a fresher weapon than the .9mm pistol that spews all those hot, clinking cartridges all over the place? Even passionate martial arts movie lovers can skip this one without regret, though two or three of the fight sequences were first rate. (Spoilage warning: plot discussed, not ending.)

These last few years have been good for lovers of martial arts movies, until recently a fringe cinematic genre, and for a new generation of stars like Jet Li. But The One (even the title is a ripoff from The Matrix) will bore even die-hard teen lovers of the form. It's slow, dull and humorless. Maybe it's time for this era to end. Jackie Chan does it a lot better, and with a lot more personality. John Wayne did the square-jaw resolute look a lot better. Li just looks ticked off all the time.

In this movie, the exotic and surprising spirituality of The Matrix is reduced to much incomprehensible gibberish about parallel universes --- the "multiverse" and the efforts of parallel figures -- in this case the two Jet Li's -- to seize control of all the different dimensions and become God of us all. Even the good Jet Li, who plays an LA County Sheriff and family man who is just doing his job and hanging around with his muscle-head buddies, and wants no part of this multi-universe politicking, doesn't exactly exude warmth. The bad Jet Li -- a monster from the parallel dimensions who transports himself through dimensions killing off competitors and look-alikes and agents from Galactic Central -- just glowers a bit more. Watching these Jet Li's square off in a noisy environment of Delta-force clad LAPD officers blasting away in their dark suits and racing unsuccessfully back and forth, traveling via Star Trek-ish time transporters, it's not only impossible to tell the good and bad guy apart at times, but pretty soon, you won't even care.

There are some nice special effects in this movie, and a super sound track that runs from jazz to hip hop to rock and rap, but there is absolutely no plot at all, and 90 percent of the battle scenes seem to take place in parking garages and sewers. They aren't nearly good enough to overcome this Jet Lag. I suppose this is all meant to be dark, but the primary impressions are just "low-budget" and "dull."

Review #2 from the second victim: chrisd

I really like Jet Li and I like science fiction, so *poof* -- a SF movie with Jet Li? A sure winner, right? Well, no. Now, I should point out that I don't expect Fellini from a Jet Li movie. I don't expect good writing, acting, casting, costumes, or even dialogue. I do expect a few things from a good fight movie, mostly good fighting, handy camera work and good lighting, and in an SF movie decent effects.

Unfortunately, "The One" disappoints. If you've seen the trailer or commercial (my way of saying spoiler warning ), there are some very cool things going on here: Jet Li kicking Jet Li's ass, Jet Li whapping people with Harleys, Jet Li flying through the air, walking the walls, jumping tenements in a single bound ... There is a lot of cool stuff going on. I assure you that must be the case, the problem is, they didn't do a good job of letting us see much of it. I don't know what specifically was wrong with the camera or editing work, but it just made you want to crane your head around to see what might actually be happening. Camerawork was one of the great things about "The Matrix." You could see and appreciate what was happening.

As Jon noted, the plot isn't really worth talking about, as there isn't much of one, and ieven that is very familiar. It's lsomething ike this: There are a bunch of universes, see, and so the bad Jet Li has traveled through 123 of the 125 universes killing the other versions of himself, becoming more powerful with every kill. As the parallel Jet Lis are killed, the Jet Lis who survive get more powerful, as the total Jet Liness is spread around into fewer Jet Lis. And so bad Jet Li, now very powerful, must kill good Jet Li (in our universe) to gain ultimate power. (Something Jamie calls the Law of Conservation of Jetliosity) Sound familiar? It should. It has been the plot of a number of science fiction franchises. In a scene near the end Jet Li even says "There can only be one of us."

But really, who cares about the story? This is a fight movie, after all. It should be judged accordingly. Can you picture watching a Jackie Chan movie and saying "gosh, this is really nothing like Sense and Sensibility"? Of course you wouldn't.

But you would want to see Jackie flipping ladders around while downing tequila shots and beating up neo-nazis. And Jackie delivers partly because you can see what he is doing. Jet Li is there, he's working, but the camera work stinks so you can't appreciate what he or his pals in Special Effects are doing. It's too bad -- "The one" could have been a lot more dumb, silly fun.

In short, if you really like Jet Li, go see it, but try to sneak in. One thing you can say about it is that it doesn't suck as much as "Romeo Must Die" did. (which isn't saying much, I know) and the effects when you can see them are kind of fun.

20 of 266 comments (clear)

  1. See Iron Monkey instead!! by Mudhiker · · Score: 5, Informative

    At first I was going to go see this, because I've enjoyed some of Li's earlier work (Though not as much as Jackie Chan's ;-) and I enjoy a good bit of kicking and punching. But after seeing the preview in the theatre (Or should I say spoiler...as that's what they all are these days...) I decided that this will be one to let the roommate buy when it comes out on DVD in a month or two.

    Instead, go see Iron Monkey! It's absolutely wonderful Kung Fu and a great story. (IANAMA)

    --
    "I want peace on earth and good will toward men." "We're the U.S. government. We don't do that sort of thing!!"
  2. oh come on now... by No-op · · Score: 4, Insightful

    Who *really* sees Jet Li / Jackie Chan / etc movies with any intention of good screen writing, a plot, or any sense of meaning? just enjoy the gags and the moves. if you're poor buy it 3 years later from walmart or steal it or something.

    I see every jet li flick I can, even if I know it's going to "suck", because the man is amazing. then again I guess I have low standards, since I don't even pretend to care about the existence of a plot line. bah.

    --
    EOM
  3. Point-nine-millimeter? by slackbp · · Score: 4, Informative

    There are no .9mm-caliber firearms. There are, however, lots of 9mm guns. (How do people come up with this stuff?)

    1. Re:Point-nine-millimeter? by falloutboy · · Score: 3, Offtopic
      "...and stopping power nothin beats a .357 Magnum S&W."


      I hear that. I was in Vegas once, and my buddies and I stopped at a gun range. Me, being the wuss of the group, got a .22 ruger (spelling?). Ammo for me for the whole day was something on the order of $5. Matt got a .357, and when he fired it, I was standing about ten feet behind him. I could still feel my belt buckle rattle.


      Oh right, the topic of the thread..


      I saw The One on Friday night, and I thought it was a really neat concept, just poorly executed. Did the numbers on all the gauges really need to be in that wierd pseudo-Kanji font?


      The thing that really rubbed me the wrong way was the amount of violence in the film. Yeah, it was an action movie, and starring Jet Li nonetheless. But most of the fight scenes were brutal, rather than well-choreographed. And almost all the violence was directed at cops.


      The Highlander ripoff dialogue at the end made me cringe. And that white multiverse agent was probably the worst actor I've ever seen outside Will Shatner.

  4. Dear lord by UberOogie · · Score: 3, Interesting
    in this movie, the exotic and surprising spirituality of The Matrix

    ...And then he goes on to trash the lack of plot in The One.

    I now know that Katz lives in some alternate dimension unto his own.

    The Matrix plot, such as it was, was a paper-thin claptrap to frame the fusion of high technology and chop-socky, and chop socky still has better fight scenes. I honestly don't know why people like the Matrix so much. It was a bad, bad movie with some okay fight scenes.

    But even letting my personal opinion of the Matrix go for a moment--and not having seen The One-- calling the Matrix spiritual and plot-laden is ridiculous. How is "Programmer finds out that the world is an illusion and that he is humanity's digital messiah" so much deeper than "Man finds out that alternate dimension version of himself is killing all the others to steal their power"?

    At least he didn't talk about the affect of the One on globization, Columbine, and geeks in a post Sept. 11 world.

    --
    "Enough of this wretched, whining monkey life." -- Marcus Aurelius, _Meditations_, Book 9, 37
    1. Re:Dear lord by quartz · · Score: 5, Insightful

      I now know that Katz lives in some alternate dimension unto his own

      So do you. All of us do. You don't really expect everybody to just accept YOUR opinion about things as the only valid one, do you? Then what's your point? Katz and other people saw something in the Matrix. You saw something else. That's how art works. Deal with it.

    2. Re:Dear lord by Forager · · Score: 5, Insightful

      The Matrix plot, such as it was, was a paper-thin claptrap to frame the fusion of high technology and chop-socky, and chop socky still has better fight scenes. I honestly don't know why people like the Matrix so much. It was a bad, bad movie with some okay fight scenes.

      The problem with movies today is that every great plot has been done already. Shakespeare pretty much used them all up about 400 years ago. And even his pieces were just rehashes of older stories. As far as basic underlying plot lines go (everything else is just details, after all) there is no plot that hasn't been done before. Any plot you summarize in one sentence will sound familiar, because it has been done already, again and again and again.

      But the beauty of the Matrix lies in the details. Matrix is a work of cinematographic beauty; not only is the camera work amazing, but the way the special effects blend with the real footage. A lot of people I've talked to (film professors, movie buffs, Joe Sixpacks) agree that if we could do these things in the real world, this is how it would look. The way things were visually concieved for The Matrix made it beautiful.

      What The Matrix did, really, was show us the same old story in such a way as to fool us into thinking we hadn't seen it before. It took something old and tired and made it look good again. The fight choreography was perfect, the cinematography was superb, and the special effects were on a level we've never seen before.

      Admittedly, Katz is milking The Matrix for all its worth, but it really was a valuable movie. Of course, that's just my opinion.

      ~Forager

      --
      student of animation and the fine arts
  5. immature and stupid by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 4, Insightful
    In short, if you really like Jet Li, go see it, but try to sneak in.

    How old are you, 15? So if a movie is really not worth paying for, but you want to see it, someone should sneak in? This just reinforces the view that open-source types want everything without paying for it.

    Do you feel this way about shoplifting too?

    Please cut this crap out..

  6. So another title could have been by A_Non_Moose · · Score: 5, Funny

    Crouching Matrix, Hidden Plotline?

    Sounds like that sums it up perfectly.

    --
    Have you read the moderator guidelines? Well, have you, PUNK? (and I want a Karma: Gnarly option)
  7. More Information? by Angry+Black+Man · · Score: 3, Informative

    I thought Neo was The One. Anyway, the movie is getting average ratings from papers across the globe. Here they are if you'd like a second opinion:

    Chicago Tribune: 3 stars

    Detroit Free Press: 1 star

    E! Online: C-

    Entertainment Weekly: C-

    Did you know that the movie was originally going to star Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson of WWF fame?

    --
    the byproduct of years of oppression by the white man
  8. The Hollywood Effect by jhol · · Score: 3, Insightful

    It's really a shame that Jet Li has gone hollywood.

    The chinese movies he has made are all, with few exceptions, excellent. The fighting is astonishing and Jet Li is truly one of the absolute best martial arts actors out there. Just watch Fist of Legend and you'll see. That movie made me into a Jet Li-fan, and the choreographer is the same who did choreography for The Matrix.

    But the hollywood effect on Jet Li's movies is terrible. Firstly because Jet Li is taken out of his habitat; he only speaks little English, let him speak Chinese in the movies damnit. Secondly because the fighting scenes are created into some strange blur, and it's freakin' impossible to see anything! Jet Li is incredible, but the fighting scenes are made into some camera-frenzy. If you watch Fist of Legend there are lengthy fighting scenes that are so good you want to see them over and over again, provided you are a kung fu-fan of course, and it's actually possible to appreciate their skills.

    The camera effects were necessary on actors in The Matrix, since they need them. Jet Li does not.

    1. Re:The Hollywood Effect by Lysander+Luddite · · Score: 3, Informative

      "The chinese movies he has made are all, with few exceptions, excellent."

      I disagree. Even if you are talking about just the martial action, he's had some bombs. I'll just mention the films I have actually seen.

      Shaolin Temple. Slow. But it is a mainland production with all that entails (nice sets but threadbare plot, about Shaw Brothers in terms of production value.) Seen once.

      Dragon Fight. Horrible characterization and even thinner plot. Stephen Chow before he was funny. Seen once.

      Swordsman 2: Amazing action (if you can stand obvious wire-fu) but what in the world is going on? And how many times must I hear the sad drinking song? Seen 3 times.

      Deadly China Hero. Wong Jing parody of OUATIC when Li decided not to do Wong Fei Hung. After this horrible thing (especially when he wears the chicken outfit to defeat the centipede group) he wisely? went back to OUATIC. Seen 2-3 times.

      Bodyguard from Beijing. Rip off of "The Bodyguard" only this time Li's a mainland professional government agent. Predictable storyline nd medocre acting. Only saving gracce was the end fight scene with the natural gas spewing. Seen 2 times.

      High Risk. Highlights of this Wong Jing film isn't Jet, it's Jackie Cheung as the Jackie Chan inspired numbnut. Seen 3-4 times.

      Other Bad films: My father is a Hero, Fist of Legend (despite the technical brilliance the hackneyed relationship with a Japanese gf and her uncle seems too revisionist for my taste) and Black Mask.

      Jet's best films are Once Upon a Time in China 2 and 3, Hitman (good acting all around and a decent storyline) and Fong Sai-Yuk 1 and 2 (again if you like wire-fu). These mix some decent characters, humor and action with good technical camera work and set pieces.

      "the choreographer is the same who did choreography for The Matrix."

      Yuen Woo Ping can make nearly anybody look good. He knows how to film shots and realizes that Jet Li's main martial arts style, Wu Shu, looks great on film even though it may not be best art for really punishing fights. Maybe that's why Ping's next hoped for prodigy Donnie Yen was also great in Wu Shu. Too bad Donnie is churning out his own stuff now.

      Also look for work by Corey Yuen. He is easily on par with Woon Ping. You can check out Woo Ping on camera in Sammo Hung's IMHO best film, Eastern Condors.

      "But the hollywood effect on Jet Li's movies is terrible."

      I agree with most of what you say. But the problem with Hollywood is not only that Chinese emigres suffer, but they've had a horrible effect on the HK film industry. Instead of action dramas that successfully fused great acting, good storylines and innovative action sequences of the mid-to-late 90s, you see claptrap like Gen X Cops, Time and Tide, and the remake/sequel of Zu Mountain. These films use lowest common denominator plots, beautiful and successful pop stars and throw in lots of special effects to try to hide horrible or confusing storylines and threadbare character development.

      I can understand Hollywood's paint by numbers approach because Hollywood is run by corporate beancounters. HK has fallen into the same trap going for glitz over substance and thinking special efects will draw audiences into movies we've seen done better a million times before.

      What used to endear me to HK films was the hard work and actual physical demands placed upon the actors and produciton staff. These days they just generate digital effects to make the actors look like they are doing something. Yeah, the old Shaw Bros Wu Xia Pan films had lots of shots with no camera movement and crazy closeups, but to get all that action in one shot is amazing.

      Save your money and go buy Shaolin Soccer. It uses special effects to enhance a good storyline with great acting and lots of actually funny gags. And just so you know the guy *doesn't* get the girl at the end.

      Sorry for drifting.

  9. Plot hole? by CmdrSanity · · Score: 3, Insightful

    One of the main issures that nagged me while watching The One:
    Jet Li's power increases because he kills the Jet Lis from other dimensions. Eventually there will be only one Jet Li left and he is supposed to have god-like power. But why is this so special? Unless all the copies of a person in all the dufferent universes simultaneously die, there will be exactly one copy at some point. Natural\accidental\other types of death will pick off the copies one by one. So, there should be god-like people popping up all over the place.
    /end nitpick

  10. Katz blows it again. by billcopc · · Score: 3, Insightful

    Oh Jon, Jonny Jonboy, stop trying to impress people with your over-analysis and mis-facts. "The One" is a quick & dirty Jet Li movie, and like all Jet Li movies, it's all about less plot and more action, of which there is plenty in this flick. Slow-motion scenes, wall-jumping and anti-gravity stunts are Jet Li's trademark. That's how it was in Black Mask & Romeo Must Die, The One is no different. He still kicks ass and he still looks like a kung fu heroin addict, and that just happens to look pretty darned cool on a big screen.

    Give it a break.

    --
    -Billco, Fnarg.com
  11. Unstoppable force versus immovable object. by big.ears · · Score: 4, Funny

    I now know which one wins. When the unstoppable force that is a ./ reader's love for The Matrix meets the immovable object that is a ./ reader's hatred for John Katz, it looks like the unstoppable force gets thwarted.

  12. (Spoilage warning: plot discussed, not ending.) by tcc · · Score: 5, Insightful

    Heh... with most hollywood production, plot discussing IS the spoilage, everybody knows the endings are either predictable (80%) or scrap the entire movie (K-pax) (15%) in some rare cases you have a good ending that doesn't make you feel raped off your 9$ entrance fee (well here in canada anyways :) ).

    Example of a good balance of storyline, action, effects and ending for Sci-fi movies: Terminator II. You can have an hollywood ending without spoiling the entire movie, I almost cried when I saw him going down... I don't recall any movies that got my full attention and even got me right into it to the point that I was all messed up when I got out, not THAT'S entertaining, that's worth the price ticket, that's worth not being copied and BOUGHT on DVD, that I can have all respect from the MPAA or any other organisation behind it trying to protect their trademark and all.

    Maybe if hollywood would start pumping more good productions like these (T2, 2001, heck, remember ET when you were a kid?, etc), people wouldn't download them off the internet and actually go see them in a big theatre with super dooper sound and popcorn, that would be worth it. Watching that on a monitor, or 25 inch tv would spoil most of it... Face it, it's far from being every pirate that owns a projection system or a 60" TV to enjoy a movie almost like if he was in a theatre. So maybe by making quality stuff and not taking their customers (audience) for complete retards, they would bring in more people.

    My reasonning works when we look at almost every classics. Anything that is unbalanced, sucks or flop. (battlefield earth is a nice example of unbalanced).

    Ask yourself what were the biggest success in the last 25 years... aside from tron that flopped because the people weren't ready for that kind of stuff, they all had something in common: Amazing or simple but good storyline, Excellent effects, good acting, good ambiance, all of this balanced.

    I'd pay 20$ per movie if I was sure that I wouldn't be pissed or left on my appetite at the end, of course it's a matter of taste also, that being noted, there's also a baseline if you don't like scifi movies, you don't want to go see one just to get pissed afterwards :) , I'd be so freakin PLEASED to pay more just to filter out the garbage and not was my time and gas for that matter.

    I'm sure I am not the only one.

    --
    --- Metamoderating abusive downgraders since my 300th post.
  13. Re:Jon... by autocracy · · Score: 3, Funny

    YES! A 2 liner from a guy with goatse.cx listed as his home page totally dissing John Katz gets modded up to 4 (at the time of this post, I bet he's going for 5)! And here's the kicker - it's insightful! I'll bet this one will even pass on M2. Take a hint folks - we want Katz gone!

    --
    SIG: HUP
  14. Jackie Chan vs. Jet Li by Castolari · · Score: 5, Funny

    Jet Li will jump in the air, flip three times, dodge an oncoming car, push off a wall, and kick you in the face 5 times before you hit the ground.

    Jackie Chan will jump in the air, flip three times, dodge an oncoming car, push off a wall, and slap you in the face 5 times WITH A LARGE TROUT before you hit the ground.

    I rest my case.

  15. My own personal review by HippieChick · · Score: 4, Informative

    When I first heard about _The One_, I was incredibly excited. It sounded like the perfect merger between the Hong Kong action flick and Hollywood special effects. They've been adding big-budget effects to kung-fu oriented films for a while now, but for the most part, they were sed to add some bang to the fight, for big, over-the-top single attacks, or as a replacement for actors with real fighting experience. Here, they would be forced by the nature of the story to actually muck around with the way people move and
    interact. Plus, I really liked Jet Li.

    That was several years ago. This July, I caught my first glimpse of a trailer for the film at Comic-Con in San Diego. I became excited all over again. It looked like they had really done what I was hoping they would do. Jet Li's
    character picks up a motorcycle in one hand and whacks somebody over the head with it. And while that's an obvious biological (and some may argue,
    physical) impossibility, the sound and imagery contained enough gravity to convince me. The clips shown had a real impact, something that they'd only begun to incorporate in films like The Matrix and The Duel. Plus, I really liked Jet Li.

    Then the TV spots came. Now I watch a lot of television, so I get a bit more exposure to advertising than your average human. I saw the trailer way too many times, and while I'm thankful that they didn't feel the need to put every action shot in the whole movie into the trailer, I did end up seeing the same stuff over and over again. I was still excited, but expose a person to something enough times, and they do get desensitized. But I still really liked Jet Li.

    Then the reviews came in. I read bits and pieces of a lot of different reviewers and the consensus seemed to be that while there were some really
    good fighting sequences in the movie, the rest of the movie was crap. Critics complained about poor acting performances and stupid plotlines. My
    expectations fell significantly. I was still looking forward to what I expected to be a few really nifty action sequences pasted together with some shoddy plot-building scenes and crappy one-liners. But there is no denying the fact that I still really liked Jet Li.

    So tonight, I went and saw _The One_. After I'd sat through the first twenty minutes of the movie, I began to wonder where all the awful acting was supposed to be. These certainly weren't Oscar-calibre performances, but Jet Li and Delroy Lindo gave as respectable an acting job as one would find in any good action flick. The storyline made sense. The actions of the characters were well-motivated. I laughed when I was supposed to. It was clear that the premise was over-the-top and that we were dealing with the soft science fiction of convenience and not the hard science fiction of physicists. Many
    action movies, both from Hollywood and Hong Kong, seem to ignore the necessity of these elements. The rest of the movie doesn't have to be spectacular, but it has to be good enough to carry the viewers from one action sequence to
    another. And _The One_ had enough quality in all the right places to do just that.

    Now I realize that this is a lot of build-up for just a review, but I wanted to give a feel for the state of mind that I was in when I went to see this movie. When I first heard about it, I was expecting a bit more than was reasonable to get out of a movie. And yet somehow, _The One_ delivered. This is one damned fine movie. The fights and chases build steadily throughout the
    movie as the hero and the villain dance around each other. They don't use their superhuman abilities sparingly. These are the two most powerful beings in the entire multiverse, and _The One_ does an incredible job of letting us
    know. Of course all the chasing and dodging is simply rising action. It all leads to a final showdown, like the most classic of kung-fu films. We are promised a fight to end all fights, and we get it. It's not just super-fast
    blows and fancy jumping and dodging. Every hit that is landed has the impact of a sledgehammer behind it. This is power.

    The special effects are used with remarkable results. While there a few brief instances where a few more hours at a computer could have yielded better results, the overall impression is seamless and transparent. There was no doubt in my mind that there were two Jet Li's on that screen and that they were beating the crap out of each other at the speed of sound. Slow motion is
    an effect that is rarely used properly, specially when extremely fast martial arts is involved. _The One_ is an exception. Due to careful attention to the laws of physics and the constant presence of normal-speed motion (e.g. falling sparks and turning machinery) in the background, we get a wonderful gut-feeling of just exactly how fast these guys are moving. Jet Li throws his arms and legs at ludicrous speed as he flies through the air, but at the same time, he's falling at a normal rate. Gravity still works, even though physiology was thrown out the window at the opening.

    Incidental effects were also very well done, like the travelling-between-universes effect. The little bits of humor were funny, if a bit silly. Jet Li delivers an understated, but effective performance. Delroy Lindo admirably fills the obligitory nowhere-near-as-good-as-the-hero-or-villain-but-st ill-manages-to-hold-his-own role. I even liked the ending.

    In short, this is one good movie, and you should go see it. The critics don't know what they're talking about.

    And in case you're wondering, yes, I still really like Jet Li.

    HC

    --
    HC
  16. Ebert's Review by talonyx · · Score: 3, Informative

    Gee, thanks, Ebert.

    Why don't you at least link to his review instead of quoting without attributing it?

    anyways for everyone else go check it out, it's a funny read.