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Ask Bruce Campbell Anything...

Posted by chrisd on from the eyeballs-on-my-shoulder-make-me-happy dept.

Bruce Campbell has a new book out (If Chins Could Kill) and I thought it would be fun for Slashdot to interview him in our charming, enigmatic way. Bruce should be familiar to you though such films as the Evil Dead (include Army of Darkness) and ,well, anything Sam Raimi has ever done. The book is a lot of fun. As usual, moderate up your favorite questions, and I'll pass on the highest scoring ones to Bruce so that he can reply to 8 or so. Bruce has a website for you to check it. It's got a FAQ and bio for you to examine.

46 of 362 comments (clear)

  1. sp by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    First is worst, second is best.

    BOW down.

    Propz to all my dead homies.

  2. if chins can kill..... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    ...how large a chin does that require?

  3. diet... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    Do you eat the flesh of the living, or the dead?

  4. forget something chrisd?? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    um ... the link for 'Evil Deed' only points back to the slashdot homepage. forget the link or something?

  5. my question by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    Are you or have you ever been a member of the Communist Party??

  6. KLATOO!... VERATA... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic
  7. Eight or so. Right. by Pussy+Is+Money · · Score: 0, Offtopic

    OK, I get it. Eight or so.

    --
    Pushin' 'n dealin', shovin' 'n stealin'
  8. Taco-Snotting with Bruce Campbell by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    THE OFFICIAL TACO-SNOTTING FAQ
    By The WIPO Troll

    What is "Taco-snotting?"

    "Taco-snotting" is a term used by one Rob "CmdrTaco" Malda owner of the popular technology website Slashdot to refer to the practice of sucking off a homosexual man (or unwilling heterosexual; CmdrTaco doesn't care) and blowing the semen back out his nose onto his pertner's (or victim's) face or body. Usually a long, bubbly stream of semen is left on CmdrTaco's face, dribbling out of his nose down his cheek: hence the term, "Taco-snotting."

    That's disgusting. Have you ever been Taco-Snotted?

    Unfortunately, yes. I first met CmdrTaco at an Open Source Convention. He invited me back to his room for a game of Quake, but when I got to there, he jumped me and tied me to his bed, stripping me. He performed his vile Taco-snotting ritual on me three times over the next two hours, sucking me to orgasm then snotting my own jizz back onto my face, in my mouth, then again on my belly.
    CmdrTaco invited several of his Open Source (or rather, "Open Sauce" -- man sauce) Convention buddies over to continue the snotfest. Linux Torvalds raped my ass with his "monolithic kernel," and Anal Cox used his "network stack" in a multitude of unspeakable ways on and in every orifice in my body.
    How did I finally escape? After about 16 hours of nonstop homosexual atrocities perpetrated against my helpless body, they all finally went to sleep. I was left there, covered in jizz-snot, chained to the bed, with fat, pasty white fags lying around and on top of me. Fortunately the spooge coating my entire body worked wonderfully as a lubricant; I was able to squirm my way out of the handcuffs and slip out the back door. I'm just glad I survived the ordeal. These geeks had a lot of built-up spunk in their wads -- I could've easily been drowned!

    Why am I always receiving emails from CmdrTaco asking me if I would allow him to Taco-snot me?

    I'm guessing you've received an email similar to the following:
    From: malda@slashdot.org
    To: wipotroll@hotmail.com
    Subject: Hey, baby - jion me in a taco-snott! :)

    Hey, baby!

    Ever done a taco-snotting with anothar fellow geek? Its more fun then trolling Slashdot, trust me! all that talk you troll with about homasexual incest and stuff got me all horny and hot for you! Is it serius? Please tell me that itt is! If you want to get with me and my Slashdot bois, drop me an emale!

    ps- Please replie to me at horny_rob_6969@hotmail.com. I'd rather the guys at VA Linux are not seen this. :) :)

    --
    CmdrTaco (malda@slashdot.org)
    You most likely forgot to uncheck the "Willing to Taco-snot" checkbox in your preferences. Whenever CmdrTaco gets bored (and who wouldn't, running a site like Slashdot all day), he roams through the Slashdot database, penis in hand, looking for people who might enjoy being Taco-snotted. And this time, he found you. Lucky you.
    CmdrTaco has probably already got the hots for your wad; there's no escaping a geek in heat, so it's probably too late... but you can possibly rectify this situation. To remove yourself from CmdrTaco's sites, log into your Slashdot account, go to your user page, click on Messages, and uncheck the box next to "Willing to Taco-snot."

    I can't stop receiving these emails from CmdrTaco!?

    Probably not. If you indulge him in a Taco-snot or two, he might leave you alone. You might also want to look into mail filtering, restraining orders, or purchasing a heavy, blunt object capable of warding off rampaging homosexual geeks in heat. Trust me, when they charge... oh, the humanity. If he gets you, and you let him Taco-snot you, he might end up tying you up in his basement and using you as his sex slave for the rest of your life (or until he accidentally drowns you in spunk while using you as his sex pony in a "circle-snot"). It very nearly happened to me.

    What is a "Circle-snot"?

    A "circle-snot" is a Taco-snotting circle-jerk: when CmdrTaco, CowboiKneel, and Homos get together and Taco-snot each other repeatedly with their gooey, hot, sticky cum, spooging all over each other's faces and pasty-white bodies until they're covered head to toe with man juice. Roblowme usually provides the extra lubricant; he owns a limo service and has ample supplies of motor oil and axle grease.
    To complete the perverted orgy, Michael, Timothy, and Jamie sometimes join in, dressed in black Gestapo uniforms, jack boots, and leather gloves. The whole group then proceeds to snot each other's spunk and whip each other's asses with riding crops and cattleprods until their pasty-white geek bodies are exhausted from all the passionate, homosexual revelry.

    Ew. Does Jon Katz get involved in this? I thought he was a paedophile, not a homosexual.

    Actually, Jon Katz a homosexual paedophile. He's also a coprophiliac, and, many suspect, a zoophile. Jon Katz is somewhat of a loner and doesn't involve himself in circle-snots. Mr. Katz usually engages in a game called "Katz juicy-douching" with his harem of little-boy slaves: a vile practice which involves administering an enema to himself of little-boy urine (forced out of them with a pair of pliers), spooging the vile muck from his ass back into the enema bag, then slathering the goo all over himself, and the little boy's chained-up and naked bodies. Unwilling boys are further tortured with the pliers until they comply and allow Mr. Katz to juicy-douche them for the rest of their lives.
    As I already said, Mr. Katz is also a zoophile. As if the sexual escapades with the helpless little boys aren't enough, Jon usually enjoys his juicy-douches best when his penis is firmly planted in a goat's anus. He is also rumoured to get off on watching his little boys eat the goat's small, bean-like turds.

    ...Are you getting hard writing this?

    Why, yes. :) Join me in a WIPO-snot? I promise I won't try and rape you or kidnap you and make you my sex slave or anything. I'm not like CmdrTaco or Mr. Katz; I only enjoy snotting on willing partners.

    What's that screaming I hear coming from your basement?

    Oh, that's just my little sister; I got her chained up down there. In fact, I just finished snotting all over her body. You should see her squirm when I spooge on her belly, lick it up, and snot it all over her face! She's such a feisty little 14 year-old bitch. Of course she's my sex slave, she's my sister. What else would she be good for? So, join me in a WIPO-snot?

    No, thanks. I'm already CmdrTaco's boi toi.

    ________________________________________

    $Id: tacosnotting.html,v 1.5 2001/11/12 22:13:22 wipo Exp $
  9. what about Del Taco?? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    Del Taco is hiring people to wear those Tamale costumes. This is a great opportunity for VA Linux employees.

    1. Re:what about Del Taco?? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

      That's VA Software, you flaming dumbass.

  10. Re:Er, Evil Dead? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    Should that link to the Evil Dead really be to http://slashdot.org/ ?

    Yes. Altough theyre just evil, not dead.

  11. Re:MetaMod Editors? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    Of course, everybody makes mistakes.

    However most of us try to proofread our shit before we show it to others.

  12. Important Question!!! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    Are you the GOATSE guy? We, the Slashdot community, demand to know the identity of the most viewed rectum on the planet!!! Even your chin could fit in that guy's backside!

  13. A Name Change by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    If you could change your first name, wouldn't you pick Poindexter?

    - Poindexter Campbell

  14. Can you by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    pull your ass-cheeks apart like this guy so that I can shove my big fat cock into you hole nice and easy?

    1. Re:Can you by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

      Hi,
      Please refrain from using my picture on your website. Thanks.

      Your Pal,
      Jon Katz

      PS : Look for parts 1 and 2 of my new series "Voices From The Anus: Lost In A Sea Of Red" cumming soon to Slashdot.

  15. Sphincters: who could know the awful truth? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    Are there any weaponized viruses that can cause the sudden and catastrophic loss of all muscular control of the sphincter? If it can be delivered to large portions of the population, would we all be forced from the cities, fleeing before a sickening tidal wave of "mud", if you know what I mean and I think you do?

  16. I'd just like to congratulate... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    ... whoever got this interview with Bruce. Now *THIS* is news for nerds.

  17. Who is it exactly... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    that wants some?

  18. evil dead set location by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    my friend lives like 10 minutes from where evil dead was shot (its in bumblefuck, tennessee). its all wooded over now, but you can still find pieces from the house and its REALLY creepy walking through there at night, two Raimi/Campbell fans with just a flashlight.

    1. Re:evil dead set location by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

      How is this offtopic, you stupid fuck.

  19. GOOD QUESTION! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    That's a pretty good question, does anyone know the answer?

  20. Re:New book? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    I thought that title was supposed to be on Jay Leno's autobiography?

  21. Re:Jim Carrey by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    It's because Bruce LOOKS like Jim!

  22. Re:Doom movie by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    This should be modded up to a five!!
    I WANT TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENED TO THE DOOM MOVIE!

  23. Re:Perspective by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    This goes up to a five also.

  24. Re:Love Bug by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    You also have a dead-ass website.

    You got that shit running on linux?

    I bet ash would laugh in the face of a linux-luser.

    I bet Ash runs BSD. He likes the Devils.

  25. Is it worth the piece of ass... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    Is your job worth the piece of ass you get on the job!?! If I wanted to get layed often, would acting be a way to do it? Such as, producing a movie; like, "Beautiful Busty Women KicK ASS": I star in it, and they have to make love to me to win their "freedom"? I don't want to be a star! I just want to FUCK beautiful, busty, and shapely starletts who want to make it big! Basically, I want to give GollyWierd a worse name!@!!!

  26. slashdot anagram by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    slashdot.org = gods harlots.

  27. Affiliate program revenue and Slashdot posts by IronChef · · Score: 3, Offtopic

    Check out the URL given for the book. It ends in:

    bookinfo.asp?theisbn=0312242646&from=MJF138

    The last parameter makes it look like the sales link is passing on affiliate info, so that the story submitter is making cash from each transaction. Knock off "&from=MJF138" and you still get to the book page.

    I wonder how many sales will be made and how much commission chrisd will earn as a result of this slashdot post?

    In the context of a commercial site, is it proper to disclose that the content creators are profiting in this way?

    Would it be more appropriate for this site to choose a charity like the EFF and send affiliate commissions to them, when stories tied to products were run?

    This isn't a flame, even if it turns out that the submitter is making a packet of the fatbrain affiliate program. I just thought it was worth talking about.

    For the sake of being a curmudgeon, here's a link to the book at Amazon. It's a better site anway, it shows more info about the book, including interior pages.

  28. Re:Friends with your fans? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    Mod this up further. This is an interesting question, not a fucking rehash of all the same questions asked in every FAQ out there.

    Why don't people ask original questions?

  29. Re:MetaMod Editors? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    What the fuck are you talking about?

    "Do you people even PROOF-READ your own stories? I mean as usual you didnt even PROOF-READ your own stories. "

    It's YOUR own stories, moron. not "you're" own stories.

    Let's moronize the sentance to make "Kid Icarus" happy.

    "I mean as usual you didn't even proof read *you are* own stories".

    See, that didn't make sense.

  30. fine, mod him down. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    It won't stop it from being true.

  31. Re:Religious views? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    honestly ... seventh day adventist

  32. Mr Campbell by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    Tell me something, are all of the men from the future loud-mouth braggarts?

  33. Re:Actor still seeks work by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    Yes, kids. That is the real Wil Wheaton who posted this comment's parent.

    OH BOY!!! And you got to respond to him!!! You are so "on top" of it!!! Can you sign my back while I suck your dick and tickle your balls?


    Yes kids. That is the real sparcv9 who replied to this comments parent.

  34. Why flee? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    Why not revel in the beautiful stench of flowing feces? Why not eat as much of the muddy goodness as you can until you puke, just so you can eat some more?

  35. Re:Actor still seeks work by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    Shit, Wil, if I was you I'd take the guy up on his offer, and while he's at it, get him to toss your salad.

  36. Re:Have you ever banged... by Imperial+Tacohead · · Score: 0, Offtopic

    Says the guy posting to Slashdot. Saddest thing I've ever seen.

  37. Re:Question: by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    You can only use my name if you promise not to post idiotic shit.

    Thank you,

    - The AC Avenger

  38. Re:Friends with your fans? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    This mod is an idiot. What I said is not "offtopic".

    Mods have been abusing "offtopic" for many months now, my comment is relevant to the original post, and to the story. I was making a comment about the current states of the Questions being asked of Bruce. I'm not going to get into a huge diatribe, but people really don't understand moderation guidelines very well.

  39. Re:Have you ever banged... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    don't forget henrietta.
    maybe she swallowed more than his soul...

  40. Re:Favorite actress? by angelo · · Score: 0, Offtopic

    You don't "bang" heroin, you "shoot" it, or "inject" it.

    --
    Lowmag.net
  41. Re:What do you want to do? What haven't you done? by gamgee5273 · · Score: 0, Offtopic

    Dammit! Where are my mod points now? This should be the question at the top of the list...

  42. my favorite AOD quote (converted to tech support) by Rai · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    "Good...Bad...I'm the guy with the admin account."

  43. Just to be clear... by geekoid · · Score: 1, Offtopic

    ...you're saying that the highest moderated questions get passed on to Bruce, of which he will answer 8 or so?

    I'd hate not to be clear on this.

    --
    The Kruger Dunning explains most post on /. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dunning%E2%80%93Kruger_effect