Kernel 2.4.17 Out

ThatComputerGuy writes "Linux kernel 2.4.17 is final, with a lot of fixes/updates. Check out the huge changelog. If you're on a desktop machine, you should try using RML's preempt patch, it definitely helps response times."

Comments

Cmdr Taco = My Bitch

[Anonymous Coward]

FUCK YOU FAGGOT!

Re:Cmdr Taco = My Bitch

[Anonymous Coward]

'Tis the season to be trolly, tra lalalala lala la la.

Christmas Present

[Cro Magnon]

Perfect timing! A new kernel for Christmas! ThanX!

Holy Shit

[TRoLLaXoR]

What a ton of changes! Geez!

Heh, Merry Christmas, Linux users!

Re:YAY !

[Anonymous Coward]

Whoever just modded me down is an asshole. I was not trolling. These Linux kernel posts come out every week.

Re:YAY !

[Anonymous Coward]

Linux assholes with mod-points modding me down because I point out the obvious, that there is a frickin new kernel post every week. Mod me back up to 1. No higher, no lower.

In celebration...

[Dutchmaan]

.. I am currently releasing forum post 1.0.0. No download necesary.

Update Forum post 1.0.1

[Dutchmaan]

Forum fix log:

Changed 'necesary' to 'necessary'.

Linux Kernel Changelog Jokes

[Anonymous Coward]

When the call over the intercom system of the LIRR says, "Conductor to channel four," you know your train is in trouble. I was on the 5:29 to Penn Station when the train came to grinding, asbestos scented stop just outside of the Jamaica Station. There was some more chatter about MA Resets and Couplers and some more indecipherable train lingo, all of which basically said this train is dead. Not exactly how I wanted to wake up from my morning commute nap.

The car I was in hadn't made it to the platform and I was forced along with the rest of the grumbling commuters to walk up three cars and wait for another train to take us to Penn. I saw some folks heading for the subway and I decided that they had a good idea. The N or the R would take me right to my job anyway. So I went down the escalator with the rest of the 5:29.

I saw her on the platform. I see lots of women. I look at women all the time. I'm no Casanova but I do look. New York City has no shortage of gorgeous women. This one on the platform was different though. She was young and had a confidence about her looks that gave her great ease in her appearance. Her fine red hair was up in a ponytail and her lightly freckled face had no makeup on it, yet her lips were a rosy tint. She held her light black jacket in front of her and wore a simple, sheer white blouse with a Spandex tank top underneath which held her ample breasts in place. Her pants were not tight but they revealed her body as the thin, silvery material clung to her curves in a delicious way. Below her knee I could see the outline of her chunky heeled boots as the hard leather pressed against the fabric of her pants.

Then there was the zipper. A thin black seam that ran from the belt line straight down to bottom of her perfectly toned ass. My filthy mind was unzipping that zipper as I stared at her ass like it held the secrets of the universe in its amazing shape. Just the way she stood with one foot turned slightly inward was sexy. There was no way for this red haired beauty not to be sexy. I imagined it must be a curse. Here I was a lecherous 38 year-old man slavering over her 20 something body; wasn't that curse enough?

I was going to wait for an N train because that express would get me to work quicker than the R that pulled up. Desperately we all jumped into the car that opened in front of us. The usual riders of the train must have been unpleasantly surprised to find that their train was jam-packed. I knew I would be on this train until 14th Street so I managed to get up against the opposing door to avoid the constant shuffle of people getting on and off. I lost sight of the vixen.

Then she was directly in front of me. Her hair smelled of fruity hair care products and her skin smelled of some oil or lotion whose sole purpose was to make men stand at attention. My pants were tightening as I looked at her from inches away. I could see her wonderful cleavage as I looked down her shirt. She could probably feel my breath on her neck. Everyone could probably feel breath on their neck though because we were all shoulder-to-shoulder. I tried chivalrously to keep my now stiffening member off of the gorgeous young girl in front of me as I began to rationalize how I would feel if some dirty old man was standing behind my daughter imagining her body writing underneath his as he fucked her until she couldn't walk. Which is precisely what I was thinking.

The train lurched forward and her ass planted itself so that her silver clad cheeks wrapped around my raging hard-on and the only way she could regain her footing was to push off of her legs and slide up my body. Her ass slid right up to the head of my cock and then she pushed off of me with her ass. I damn near blew a load in my pants right there. She couldn't turn around but she turned her head to me, "I am SO sorry, sir."

I simply nodded back. Screw her father all I could think about was her bent over my desk and me wailing on her with my now painfully erect cock. The train continued to bounce down the track and as we came to the next stop someone exiting pushed her off balance and she fell into me again. This time I took her lightly by the elbows and righted her. She remained closer to me this time and thanked me again. She looked at me for a second and smiled. I was sweating, probably looking very flushed. She pressed against me intentionally and stayed. She tilted her head back onto my chest and said directly to my ear, "Is this OK?"

I nodded. The train began again and my redheaded fantasy began a slow but deliberate grind on my body. My fingers touched her elbows again and I slid them towards her hands that were underneath her jacket. She worked her ass all over my dick and I realized she was rubbing herself my left hand helped her and my right had got a hold of her breast. Despite her large breasts she had no bra on, this tank top was meant to hold her in place. Her nipples became hard and I pinched hers softly and surreptitiously as there was a train full of people.

Her breathing became threaded and her breath was hot and sweet. My mouth ached to kiss her but then we would surely be found out. The train went dark and she exploded in a frenzy of movement as she molested me with her entire body. There seemed to be urgency in her movements. Her hand was working own body furiously, mine seemed to be in the way so I moved it but she quickly caught it and dragged it back. As her ass rode my pole manically she lifted her leg and rubbed her booted calf on me.

I continued working her nipple and with my other hand her very hot pussy. Her entire body was heating up as she thrashed against me. I buried my head in the nape of her neck and came in my pants in thick spurts.

"Shit," she exhaled into my ear, "Oh man that was so fucking good."

The lights came back on and I could see that she was covered in a thin sweat. She turned around as the door behind me opened and kissed me as I stepped out of the train to avoid the crush of people exiting. I saw how truly amazing she looked as I kissed her.

"You have to call me. I want to do this again; I want to be with you. I want you inside of me," she handed me a card and walked on wobbly legs to the escalator, pulling her hair from the pony tail. I watched her incredible body leave me. There was an N across the platform. I took it to work and threw my underwear out in the restroom trash.

Re:Linux Kernel Changelog Jokes

[Anonymous Coward]

There was nowhere to sit. Well there was one place to sit; it just didn't look like a good place. The man on the end was obese and the guy against the window did not look friendly at all. He was scratching out letters into the daily crossword and he had earbuds connected to a radio, no doubt listening to Howard Stern. Shannon looked at the available seat again and meekly asked the obese man to get up so she and all of her gear could get in to the only seat left.

Big day today, Shannon reminded herself as she slipped her thin body past the obese man. Oh my god, was that his thing? He'd stretched his hips out to "accidentally" bump into her as she got past him. As she sat with her bag on her lap her practice clarinet, a long plastic tube that looked like a clarinet but made no sound, slid out of the bag onto the surly looking man against the window. With out even looking up he handed it back to Shannon. As she sat she noticed him looking at her.

With a shot at the pit orchestra for the play 42nd street Shannon had dressed a little funkier than she would for her usual job, teaching woodwinds to eighth graders. Today her skirt was shorter, and faded denim. Her shirt was a snug metallic material with a plain white men's Oxford over it. It was the boots that made the outfit funky though. They were obligatorily black but they had a tongue frontispiece and a large buckled strap across the calf. The heels were the chunky kind all the girls were wearing now. Her red hair was tussled as always and she tried leaving her schoolmarm glasses home but several near misses with walls changed her mind. She decided not to wear any stockings and her pale freckled skin contrasted with her black boots.

The surly man leaned forward so far that his head was against the back of the seat in front of him. He kept looking at her boots. It was odd for Shannon to receive attention like this. It made her feel uncomfortable, but at the same time it felt good. The attention was defraying the guilt she felt spending 150USD on the boots. She tugged at her skirt, but not to pull it down, to pull it up. She watched his eyes wander up her thighs.

No one at Branford Middle School had given her such lecherous looks before. He pulled his right ear bud out of his ear and smiled. Mr. Surly looked like Mr. GQ now. Shannon felt a wave of intense warmth flush her body. In 33 years a smile had never done that to her. Life in conservative Connecticut simply wasn't like that. Even in the rougher middle class sections she grew up in as her father moved from military contract job to the next. Certainly she'd dated, even seriously but her love of music always won out over the men in her life.

"So you play clarinet?"

Shannon was dumbstruck, unable to talk to the beautiful man speaking to her. She regained most of her composure and managed to utter, "I teach."

"I used to teach music, guitar though. Mostly to boys who wanted to be Jimmy Page," he added with another perfect smile.

Shannon unconsciously stroked her smooth plastic clarinet. He noticed.

"What sends you to Manhattan?"

"I, I am going to an audition for an orchestra pit."

"What do you like about woodwinds so much?"

He wasn't even touching her but she was getting the oddest urges. She wanted to grab him by the face and kiss him with her deft tongue. She wanted touch him; it was becoming an imperative for her. There was another hour and a half left in the train ride to Penn Station. The words slipped out of her mouth as if she was no longer in control of what she said.

"I just like having a vibrating reed on my lips, in my wet mouth," she said leaning towards him. She shifted her weight onto her left hip and crossed her right leg over her left trying to quell the urgent feeling between her legs. More of her thighs were revealed to him. The sudden brushes of the obese man's arm on her ass made her gasp in a breathy inhale.

"Really?" Asked the man driving Shannon insane.

"There's something about the way the reed feels all rough on my tongue and the mouth piece is so smooth on my upper lip. It's sensuous. When you play brass you just get numb and soaked in saliva, but a reed is like a long, long kiss," Shannon reached out and touched his knee. He moved her hand straight up his thigh.

Shannon, oblivious to the packed Amtrak train, began mouthing his chin, then his lower lip. Her right hand caressed his crotch though his suit pants. He responded immediately and Shannon stroked him, pressingly lightly with her fingers, fingering a scale on his huge member.

She sucked and nibbled his tongue and lips. She kissed him deeply. His hands began to explore her petite waist and ass. She broke the kiss panting into his neck. He pushed her right knee away from her left and explored her inner thighs. She was melting into his strong body.

When the obese man skittered away from them to give them room he leaned into her ear, "People are looking. Let's take this to the bathroom where I can get you off."

Shannon felt like she was in a daze, like she was drugged. She was so overwhelmed by the need to be touched that she simply followed him. She never even asked his name. She began to realize how crazy this was she was going to go into a train bathroom and she would certainly have sex with a complete stranger. She had left her clarinet in her bag on her seat. Yet she continued to follow him.

To the people in the head of the car where the bathrooms were thy seemed like a married couple on their way to the Café Car, to the people that watched Shannon attack the man against the window, they wanted to follow. Shannon stepped into the bathroom with her exciting stranger. He pulled her into his body that was thick and strong and began kissing her while grinding into her limp body. She began to move with him sliding up and down on his massive legs and chest.

"My name is Robert, but most people call me Bob. Call me that when you scream my name out; OK?"

"Shannon," she huffed as she went back under the haze of overt sexuality.

Bob pulled her skirt up and snapped her silky underwear off of her body. He sniffed them quickly and shoved them in his front pocket. That would have normally disgusted her, now it drove Shannon wild. Bob dropped to his knees and grabbed her thin leather clad claves and began working his tongue on her nearly hairless pussy. It was as if he were trying to stick he face inside of her.

Shannon was an oral virgin. The only man she'd ever been with had never done this to her. She had orally pleased him but he never returned the favor. Charles was a good lover in her estimation, but really did nothing that she couldn't to do herself in a few minutes. Bob was driving her crazy. He was pushing his tongue in her, and on her with such delicious pressure. Her gasps of pleasure were becoming high-pitched yelps. He wasn't letting her squirm away as he held her firmly in place by her calves.

Bob couldn't believe what was happening. He'd never had this effect on woman before. She was going crazy, her upper body was thrashing and her hips were moving a mile a minute. She reached up and was pushing on the ceiling with her ass on the sink while he ate her in frenzy. His cock was so hard it was hurting him. He was amazed that this funky little tramp was just giving in to his every move.

So was Shannon. She had never, ever, performed a public sex act. She had never kissed a man first. She had never been this hot before. She began to shake at the hips that moved her sex over his tongue even faster driving her to a loud wet orgasm.

"Uunngh!" She let out a guttural release from some deep, musky part of her body. Bob's face was covered in her juices and he was standing up undoing his pants. She was too exhausted to assist him but she wanted to tear his clothes off. She slid to the floor crouching with her legs spread wide. Blasts of cold air came from under the door and cooled her hot, wet mess. In her face was his massive erection.

Shannon was amazed by his size. He was bigger than her entire head and only with both of her strong musical hands could she grasp the enormous girth. She urged his manhood with fast tugs on the lower portion of his giant member. Her tongue danced on the head of his cock.

"Oh my God," she said before she took him into her mouth. Her lips wrapped tightly around him as she slobbered saliva on his shaft making it slick. She pinned him to the back of her throat but could not swallow him he was too large. She bobbed up and down on him and she would stop at the top and blow on him and move her tongue like his cock was a mouthpiece. Charles would explode after a few moments of that treatment. Bob's shaft merely got harder. Shannon worked him furiously; she wanted him to cum in her mouth. It felt like a perfectly filthy thing to do, and she felt filthy.

Her skirt was up around her waist, her pussy was soaking wet and her breasts felt like they were on fire. Bob seemed to know what her body needed. His knees buckled and rubbed her swollen nipples. The stretchy metallic fabric felt good on his bare skin and was like hundreds of tiny fingers on hers. She pulled her hands off of his cock long enough to undo the front snap bra to let her ample C cups free. Her nipples poked through the fabric instantly.

Bob was rocking into her mouth as her insistent tongue drove him to slam his cock deep into her throat, stretching her out. He came hard, grinding into her face. Pumping one hot load after another into her sucking mouth. She swallowed his semen greedily and cleaned him with her acrobatic tongue. Slurping on his rod.

Shannon stood and Bob grabbed her sensitive tits though the fabric, squeezing them roughly. Shannon looked Bob in the eyes and begged, "Fuck me."

Bob picked up her slight frame and dropped her on his huge, pussy-splitting cock. Shannon screamed out as he reached her limit. Bob began sliding her up and down on his massive pole. She was squealing even while she gasped. Bob had her by the backs of her knees and her booted legs dangled free as he pummeled her insides. There was no friction to slow him down and he began stretching her deeper and deeper. Shannon's tits bounced in sync with Bob's manic pounding.

He pulled her off of his stick and faced her against the wall.

"This is gonna hurt a little baby."

He buried himself fully into her small, tight snatch from behind. Again and again. Each thrust more debilitating than the last. He worked her into frenzy. She pumped on his dick as hard as he was fucking her. Her ass was perfect and looking at her incredible tits bounce drove him to slam into her harder and deeper still. She could not contain the animalistic screams that were welling up inside her. As the Amtrak train barreled through Westchester, New York, Shannon, Ms. McNally, screamed at the top of her lungs, "Ram your cock in me you motherfucker. Break my fucking cunt! Break me! Break me!"

Bob did what he could on that count and slammed into her relentlessly trying to stave off a massive orgasm himself. Shannon was unnaturally tight. Women he had been with before all reacted to his size with squeals of pleasure but this woman was fucking him like she was possessed. Her pussy was strong and it was taking a real beating. He's never pounded anyone this hard.

"Urrrugh! Stick me you fucker! Fuck it! Fuck it! Yeah! Jam it home! Bust my cunt! Ugh! Ugh! I'm yours! Break me! Break me! Rip me apart!"

She screamed a non-stop stream of filthy language saying things she's never said, or felt before. Bob was destroying her from behind. His pussy smashing cock was obliterating her demeanor. He was making her do this. He was forcing her to live out a fantasy she didn't know she had. He was fucking her mindless. He screwed on her without end. She spasmed wildly as she came. She slammed down on his cock hard and grabbed him with her thin freckled arms to stop the motion. She sat impaled on his shaft enjoying the fullness of his raging hard on inside her, throbbing and hot.

"Fuck my ass. Hurt me."

Bob slid out of her clenching vagina with a loud, wet pop. He wanted to do this to many women before, but never had the nerve to try. This one was begging him to do it to her. He pushed his cock up and into her ass cheeks resting the head of his monstrous weapon on her pink bud. Using a combination of pushing and pulling her down he broke into her.

Shannon swooned as her ass was penetrated. She'd asked for it and now it was happening. He continued to deepen his entry with a slow, persistent push. Shannon's world flickered in and out, colors flashed in her mind's eye. He began to saw in and out of her, ripping her apart with every movement. The feeling was indescribable. It was engulfing her. It was as if Bob's cock was filling every part of her body. As if he'd jumped into her skin.

The incredible tightness and the feeling of her ass succumbing his size was intoxicating. He held her beautiful breasts in his hands and was surprised to feel wetness on the back of his hands. Shannon was drooling on him. Her tongue wagged out of her mouth. Her body went limp as Bob rammed himself fully into her ass. As he pulled out her body stiffened and she reached behind her grabbing his head grunting unintelligibly as he pussy sprayed juices everywhere. Her feet left the ground as Bob rammed her. He flattened her gorgeous ass cheeks as he pummeled her.

Orgasms wracked her body and numbed her mind. Her tiny freckled body focused only on the man inside of her. Bob's hands moved off of her tits and put her in a full Nelson as he made one final ass reaming thrust into her now exhausted body. He came, filling her with his hot cum. His release into her softened his hard dick immediately and he pulled out of her now gaping ass. Bob sat on the toilet pulling Shannon into him. She was a mess.

Shannon's body was covered in sweat and their cum. Her ass leaked his spunk and her boots were spattered with juices. She was barely conscious and her head lolled from shoulder to shoulder. Bob continued working on her nipples. Finally reaching down and merely touching her engorged clit sent her into an orgasm. Bob smiled broadly; he'd fucked this one completely.

Bob stood and began dressing. Shannon lay limp on the toilet shuddering as aftershocks of her amazing experience. Bob cleaned his thick meat in the sink rubbing all of the spunk off of him.

"Baby you need to get up, we're almost in New York."

"Oh my God, what did you do to me? I feel so good. That was the best ever."

"I don't know what got you so hot but they oughta put that in a bottle. You were great. I never fucked anyone's ass before. God that was great."

Shannon tried to stand but her legs gave out. Bob looked at her splayed on the bathroom floor of train. She didn't belong there. What had made her so horny? What had driven this schoolteacher to fuck, in public, so hard? Bob didn't know the answer but he liked the result.

Shannon regained her composure and fixed herself up the best she could. Her pussy and ass ached from the pounding they'd been through. She walked tenderly back to her seat. All eyes were on her; Bob kept his head down but was smiling. Women on the train looked at his crotch and he was stiffening. They sat. The final 20 minutes of the train ride Shannon slept soundly against Bob who kept his hand on her thigh unable to keep his hands off of her gorgeous skin.

Re:Update Forum post 1.0.2

[Anonymous Coward]

Forum fix log:

No changes. It has, however, been 5 minutes since 1.0.1 came out, therefore we decided to release a new version. Unfortunately this update will require that you lose your uptime in exchange for the new changes, although there are none.

Re:Preempt Patch?

[Anonymous Coward]

Of course an actual technical improvement in the kernel would not be appreciated in Linux. They'd rather hear about support for the latest Via audio chipset. Half of these retards don't even know what the word preemptive means. But no doubt you'll hear them spouting off about it in the next BSD vs Linux debate.

Linux Kernel is lagging behind

[00Monkey]

The Windows Kernel is up to 5.1, Linux is lagging behind...

Re:YAY !

[Anonymous Coward]

I know that chick, I rufied her drink last week and then stuck my long dong in her ass!! Damn, she squealed like a stuck pig, but she loved it! I made her lick it all off when she was done, too.

MOD PARENT UP!!

[ArchieBunker]

Goddam she is *HOT* I'd fuck her for all eternity. Better save thos pics before its /.'d

Re:Update Forum post 1.0.3

[Anonymous Coward]

Forum fix log:

# Unlike Linux developers, that can actually code,
# we're only gay, and like spreading our asses
# wide open.

Re:YAY !

[Anonymous Coward]

eRECT!@#!@&#*(!@*$ is my p33nis. got any b00bies or n00dies? whut is h3r n4m3?

Re:YAY !

[Anonymous Coward]

Mmm... underaged tight sluts, wet and ready for action. spooge.

--ian

ps - hi lwz

Why are you upgrading?

[nbahi15]

I use my office and home server on 2.4 kernels without trouble. I got over upgrading to the latest kernel a long time ago. I only upgrade if I need functionality or encounter a serious problem. I moved to 2.4 for USB support. I've only had one kernel panic on my machine in the 2.4 series. And as far as the preemptive patch I have never found it necessary. I do add the microcode support and load the microcode fixes from Intel and my array uses reiserfs which I patched.

A note

[Anonymous Coward]

Regardless of what any of you say, updating Windows with Windows Update is several orders of magnitude easier than all of these "download-compile-reboot-repeat" cycles CmdrTaco alluded to. This alone is sufficient reason for linux to be unsuitable for desktop users.

Does freebsd kernel have this

[Anonymous Coward]

I have been hearing a lot of good things about FreeBSD in the past few months. I was wondering if FreeBSD kernel has this feature as well.

gay

[Anonymous Coward]

linux is for gays

And FreeBSD users...

[athlon02]

just yawn, ignore yet another kernel update, and go about their lives.