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How to Film a Tornado
goneaway writes: "An interesting examination of the competitive world of filming tornadoes or "torn porn" as they call it over at the Atlantic. A fair amount of attention is given to the mechanics of filming and the inventions created to "safely" film while all hell is breaking loose."
This sounds pretty dangerous- I will stick to filming fruit and other serene objects!
graspee
amazing how they manage to write an article about a stunningly visual phenomenon, and yet don't include a single image.
When will I end this grieving ? When will my future begin ?
It may be escapism, avoidance of personal life problems, or one of any number of distractions. however, most technical innovations in film and many other mechanical disciplines come about this way.
Stop motion film and animation, for instance, are very laborious ways of accomplishing tasks of communication that can be easily accomplished in other ways. However, the drive of fanatical individuals has resulted in some great art in those cases.
Anything that increases safety and stability while filming a tornado would also increase these characteristics in other chaotic situations, such as a war zone or the scene of a terrorist attack.
Goat sex free since 2001
Man, that sucks.
In a well-written article/book pictures will often detract from the writing. Also, they will lead to people not reading your article, they'll just glance at the photos and read the captions. I applaud writers who still publish with the idea that we should take the time to read their words, not just glean the information from it.
DataSquid.net, a little about me.
"Well, good luck finding a judge that doesn't run a bestiality site."
Wouldn't it be a little easier to mount a remote control airplane from radio shack or better quality, with an epoxy encased digital video camera with solid media?
Have one inner relay remote controlled to let go and start recording till the battery ran out. Fly this sucker into the tornado after making as many close passes as possible.
Then when the tornado is letting up track it with a simple directional locater picked up for under 100 bucks at the spy shops online?
Find the camera and crack open the solid media which sould survive anything short of getting broken in half against a house or something.
This is an idea that could be done under 500 bucks total. If I had the money these guys throw around I'd be making these planes in bulk and having my friends come out and help fly them into the tornados!
) Human Kind Vs Human Creation
) It'd be interesting to see how many humans would survive to serve us.
I won't abuse the article by copying the links here. When you see those photos and videos, seems crazy how anything so beautiful can be so destructive - or vice versa.
No, your children are not the special ones. Nor are your pets.
Step 1... Set up where the tornados are likely to be. Any trailor park will be a good place to start because as everyone knows tornados are naturally attracted to mullet hair cuts
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In other words a magazine that never presumed it's audience was stupid or uneducated, but had a curiosity about the world, and a certain level of education.
"It is a greater offense to steal men's labor, than their clothes"
This reminds me of a japanese tourist who never captured Tornado on his film. It took him 10 years to capture Tornado on his film.
I've heard about perversions, but this literaly blew me away...
Looking for people to chat about multicopters, coding, music. skype: gtsiros
As someone who has seen the movie 'Twister' no less than a dozen times, I believe the answer to capturing the ultimate 'Torn Porn' is painfully obvious. Simply do the following:
:-)
:-)
(1) Purchase a gross of small, clear plastic balls (this can be substituted by a large number of the clear plastic eggs that silly putty comes in...)
(2) For a solid week, every time you see one of those highly-annoying X-10, wireless camera ads while cruising the net actually purchase one - if my calculations are correct that should give the average browser approximately 538 wireless cams within a seven day period...
(3) Insert a single X-10 wireless cam (with newly hacked, longer lasting self contained power source) in each of the clear plastic balls/eggs.
(4) Next...as they learned in 'Twister' , you need to attach twisty-twirly-thingy-mabobs ® made from old pop cans to the balls to help them enter the tornado's vortex safely.
(5) And finally, create a large tin can with a half-moon Plexiglas top that looks like a cross between R2D2 and the first Lunar Lander to house all of these video-balls.
Now that we have created the device, it is time for deployment. Once again, I will take a page from the movie 'Twister' and suggest that you strap the launcher into the back of a very large (not to mention, expensive) 4x4 truck. Then, simply find a big-ass tornado, put on the cruise, drive straight at it and jump out at the last minute!!!
Oh well...just a thought!!!
Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. -- Benjamin Franklin
Good idea in theory, but it probably would not work well in practice.
First of all, there's debris. LOTS of debris. It would smash the plane to bits long before it got into the vortex of a large tornado.
Second, there's often hail in the general area of a tornado.
Third, it was tried with a helicoptor, but it was realized what the hail around the tornado would do to the blades (namely they wouldn't exist anymore)
There are only 10 kinds of people in this world... those who understand binary and those who don't
IANAM (I am not a meteorologist), but...
Civilians film a lot of the tornado footage with their home video cameras. I would suppose that it is more dramatic, considering the majority of these people don't have any training, are terrified, and escape unscathed by chance. Their emotions are in strong contrast to tornado enthusiasts, who, from most peoples' observations, usually appear intrigued, not frightened.
Of course, to capture a tornado, a number of variables must be correct and you must meet several objectives first.
Obviously, there must be light (or you must have nightvision). A great number of tornadoes occur during the night hours and probably aren't captured on film due to this reason.
You must actually locate the area of a storm that is most likely to produce a tornado. The advent of Doppler [sic, it's named after a person] radar has made this task much less difficult. Meteorologists will usually search for the classic "hook and coil" signature that is indicative of a tornado.
Finally, you must arrive at the target location before the tornado activity disippates. They usually last less than 20 minutes.
Do you like German cars?
All I know is, you can drive through a house, admire the flying livestock, and then test out your "cool" invention. All without much more risk than a few bruises and a repaired love interest. I wish I had a tornado to chase.
Thank me later when you make millions off of my hard work and dedication.
Anonymous Coward: (n.) 1. nerd at school or library. 2. karmawhore in training. 3. embarrased prep.
The guy who wanted to drive a fortified SUV INTO a tornado shouldn't be allowed to breed. We will be hearing more about him in the Darwin awards, rest assured.
Look, I live in Tornado alley, and up to a few months ago lived in "pre-fabricated housing", a.k.a. a trailer home (a.k.a. "tornado bait"). I'm a part-time storm spotter, and I've seen the damage a "little" F-1 gustnado can cause, let alone an F-5 monster. An F-5 will quite literally suck the asphalt off a highway.
If I were out tooling around in, say, an M1A1 Abrahms Tank, and I saw a tornado coming, I would turn tail and run (at right angles to the path of the tornado) as fast as that tank's treads would take me. Wind speeds in the vortex of a tornado have been measured at OVER 300 miles per hour with Doppler radar. Even a tank will be blown over.
This fool, in his SUV, will be waking up wondering what all these midgets are doing around him. Either that, or wondering where all the harp music is coming from.
I just dodged around a storm last night trying to get home. By local standards it wasn't anything much, but it left the roads covered in hail, dropped over an inch of rain in thirty minutes, and had 60 MPH sustained winds. I was driving, listening to the two local storm spotter nets on 2 meters, and trying to spot the rain and hail shafts in the lightning. It wasn't fun.
I've seen the shows about tourists coming to the US to see a tornado - they spend 2 weeks driving from Texas to South Dakota to see a storm, covering over 3000 miles! Word of advice folks: just come over in the spring, and plan a normal vacation. See the
sights and enjoy yourselves. The tornados will find you. Trust me.
www.eFax.com are spammers
It is a gateway, leading men to watch more violent things like police chases, boxing matches, and hurricanes.
It changes values and attitudes such as desensitization and "tolerance" which leads to more depraved tornography.
There are reports in many urban areas of increased trailor parks around tornography outlets.
Lewison tapped on the window of the housing, to draw my attention to its strength. "Supposedly, it will stop a twenty-two," he said. It hadn't yet been tornado-tested, but earlier in the year Lewison had used a homemade potato gun to fire a spud at 160 mph directly at the Lexan-shielded lens. "It didn't do any damage," he reported. "And we got some pretty interesting video."
Lewison: Check out this tornado camera I made.
Dude: Hey that's neat, how strong is it.
Lewison: The guy at the hardware store says it can take a bullet.
Dude: Lets shoot potatos at it.
Lewison: Ok.
That actually sounds more interesting than torn porn. They should use high speed photography so they can make time last longer when the storm hits.
How do you film tornados? CAREFULLY
From afar, we can see the power of the beast very clearly and in focus. From close, we feel placed in the torando, as the shots are out of focus, there are tons of whip-pans, etc. This is why there are not as many good documentarians out there. It is an art form to use both sytles in a clear manner.
You know who I think is crazy? All my ex-girlfriends!
Anyone familiar with the magazine will know that they do many pieces without pictures. And yes they also do occasional photo essays. But the written word is their forte.
Obviously, to answer your critique this should have appeared in National Geographic This is a matter of Taste.
The written word is preffered for many things.
For example, I doubt that you would want to see the linux kernel published as a picture book. You would need too many crayons.
The basic concept is that this is a magazine that specializes in the written word. Do not complain when the when there is a lack of pictures, because this is not the main audience they cater to.
The ability to read books and magazines without pictures is a rare and valuable commodity these days. Which shouldn't stop anyone from enjoying pretty pictures as well. Just know what you are looking at.
"It is a greater offense to steal men's labor, than their clothes"
Great novel by Bruce Sterling about hacking and tornados!
The plane is expendable, All it serves to do is to get the camera into the storm where I do not wish to be. The debris is what I want to film. Imagin all the crap flying around, if I can catch even a tenth of the stuff with any clairity people would pay. Fridges hitting cows and people hitting their own trailer homes and such. The higher the framerate the better the results, that's where I'd spend the money to get a quality camera, and I would SOOOO insure it against nature and such.
(imagine bringing it in to radioshack afterwords. "piece of crap didn't last an hour" (set bag of parts on desk) "I want another, it's under warranty.")
) Human Kind Vs Human Creation
) It'd be interesting to see how many humans would survive to serve us.
Big deal, my friend Debbie can do the same thing.
As far as knocking over a tank, I could believe it (despite what the retired military men might say). Look at photos of the damage done by a storm, a 65-ton tank is just more grist for the mill.
These storm chasers are not just endangering their own lives. They are forcing local police and rescue to overextend themselves at an already busy time. They are also in the way of the real storm chasers, the ones from NSSL and CAPS, driving trucks (with doppler radar dishes on the back). (Check these trucks out. They are really cool.) I have heard that people tend to stop in the middle of the road to get some footage, making it difficult for researchers and rescue crew to pass.
I have a message to all would-be storm chasers: If you want a thrill, do something safe, like sky diving. At least there you have a backup plan (the reserve chute). What are you going to do when a piece of wood comes flying at you at speeds in excess of 300 miles per hour?
are cool!
But wouldn't the plane get thrown around at the same speeds as the vast majority of debris, minimizing damage?
My server
You'd be unlikely to find the pieces. They'd be emulsified with the rest of the rocks, dirt,dogs, houses, trees, cars and asphalt from the road, and spread along a 1 to 30 mile by 300 yd locus.
To hear the gods laugh tell them your plans.
seems like a better alternative, to me.
A plane would be a problem for the reasons already mentioned.
Instead, maybe you'd want to try a wheeled vehicle, either remote-controlled or (once the technology gets there) autonomous with obstacle-avoidance, road-following and tornado-seeking behaviors. Give it all-terrain drive, lots of kevlar, and a goodamn resilient camera. It would help to test a prototype by shooting it with a .308 a few times to see whether the different assemblies take damage. This vehicle should be literally bulletproof. Use a wheeled vehicle to take advantage of local roads that the tornado may cross. Using this you should be able to drive the vehicle (or it should be able to drive itself) either near or into the tornado's path. Just lay it down on a closed highway and go.
Of course, this vehicle may also be useful for military reconaissance work, given some modifications to its software.
(My eventual ambition is to work with robots)
Hope this helps.
Finding God in a Dog
"Torn Porn"
S&M for the confirmed videophille.
I'll never be able to watch "Gone with the wind" again.
"Disagree... An M1A1 wouldn't have any trouble with an F-5."
Yup, but the person inside would be tomatoe paste.
Don't know who the Black SUV owner is,
but the IMAX crew that has been here (Norman, OK) for the last 2 years and also
this upcoming spring was talking about building a similar vehicle, to drive into
a "small tornado". Don't know if that'll actually
happen...but it'll make some great Darwin stories when the "small tornado" rapidly
intesifies in a small, intense, F3 (a la Pampa Texas, 1995) and launches the vehicle 50 feet
straight upward.
> But wouldn't the plane get thrown around at the same speeds as the vast majority of debris, minimizing damage?
Yes, once it gets there. The hard part is surviving the transition into that debris field from the outside - you'd have to fly the aircraft in the same direction of spin, and at the same speed, to avoid *most* of the debris on the way in.
The way out (assuming survivial..) would need the same kind of strategy to avoid being pulped.
Lots of tornados don't have much a debris field. In fact, a lot of them have no visible funnel or very little funnel (hence no debris or water condensation) for much of their length - see this page for an example.
I think the hard part would be the wind shear near the wall of the vortex. It could be very extreme. And of course, if you flew in too low you could hit debris.
I've considered doing such a thing, but it would take a lot of time, have low probability of getting good stuff, and the odds of finding the plane intact are low (even though I would put an ELT-like device on it - I have found LOTS of those by RDF).
The only good weather is bad weather.
When I lived in Missouri, I remember having to run from our neighboors house to ours (about 50 yards) as one of those supercells was going over.
:) I remember another afternoon watching funnel clouds drop out of a cell to the north of us, but that was nothing compared to the green skies.
At 7pm, the skies where an honest-to-god GREEN. It was the erriest thing I've ever seen (and I am on USENet
If I ever get back out there, as cool as I think nature can be, I'll be buring my ass deep into the ground.
Other than that, I'd suggest Troy's bear suit and magic materials for the fashion-impaired tornographers. :-)
Money for nothing, pix for free
of a guy who loved a girl who was a guy!. Check it out!
Special people have long socks, ride short buses, & invent witty sigs.
I think that, perhaps, a better idea than a (flimsy) airplane would be a rocket. Mount it at a likely site, and then, when a nice tornado comes overhead, remote launch it straight into the storm... A couple of solid rocket engines and a casing with a GPS tranmitter in it to help locate it afterwards.
Sometimes boldness is in fashion. Sometimes only the brave will be bold.
hehe, I've seen that .avi
They sure didn't have much trouble filming her!
* * Always question "the National Interest" - 9 times out of 10 it is a cover for evil
If you can, try to track down some video of this guy... I've seen some on a crazy-things-people-do type video show... it was very interesting.
This guy used big swinging logs to nail himself in the chest hard enough to throw him back a good 20 feet while wearing the suit, repeatedly stood in front of a jeep driving at him at 45mph or so and just let it cream him, multiple people beating him with bats as hard as they could... very entertaining stuff... he was perfectly safe, but the version of the suit he was using was so heavy that he couldn't really get up after he was knocked down.