Instant Messenger or Instant Advertiser?

Shadow2097 writes: "ABC News is running this moderately disturbing story about a new, highly targeted form of advertising. Two companies, SmarterChild.com and ActiveBuddy.com have teamed up to deliver interactive Instant Messenger bots that talk to children and deliver ever-so-subtle ads for various products. Just when you think market saturation has reached the limit, leave it to a greedy corporation to start targeting the most naive and vulnerable demographic there is."

Comments

Active Buddy?

[digitalunity]

Great, push technology again. This time, they can IM you big files. So, can I get p0rn pushed to my computer?

How is this anything new?

[sniepre]

Frankly, i dont see this as a "disturbing trend"...

I see it as the continuation of marketing strategies employed since television existed....

How many of you remember Lucky Charms or Tony the Tiger telling you how GGGrrrrreat!! his cereal was, or Ronald McDonald telling you how fantastic a happy meal was from McDonald's.

Wether its on the television or on the web, it's the same principle at work, IMHO.

Re:How is this anything new?

[Suppafly]

Not sure about Active Buddy.. but SmarterChild is obviously not like talking to an eliza type program that convinces you to buy things. SmarterChild is more like an interactive program that can play text based games with you and give you information such as weather and stocks. You'd be hard pressed to trick anyone that can read that they are talking to anything other than a computer script.

Re:How is this anything new?

[mgv]

And what excuse is given in response to the moral questions? We have to make a profit. Disgusting.

Nah, its a great excuse. Ask any drug dealer.

Michael

Re:How is this anything new?

[sweet reason]

obviously not like talking to an eliza type program
You'd be hard pressed to trick anyone that can read that they are talking to anything other than a computer script.

when weizenbaum made eliza available on his campus system, lots of people started "talking" to it. when he proposed to log the conversations for analysis there was a huge outcry. people were telling eliza their problems and secrets!

it's amazing how little plausibility such a thing really needs. adults acted as if they were fooled. kids might well really be fooled. and even if they know intellectually that they are talking to a computer, all the advertizer really needs is that the "conversation" have the persuasive power of a real one. emotionally, it may well have.

Re:How is this anything new?

[rawb]

You guys are all freaking out... Smarterchild doesnt go IMing these children on its own. You have to IM it yourself, usually with a specific purpose in mind. The same is true of every active buddy bot. They arent trying to trick anyone at all; They provide a service and are hoping to get corporations interested in it. Their product does have real potential. Imagine each brand of detergent having their own IM SN, where you could ask them the best way to get a stain out, or could compare ingredients between each competing product. You won't hear any public outcry from me until these active buddy bots start amassing huge AIM lists and spamming people.

Re:How is this anything new?

[Alex Belits]

The problem is, the conversation is hard to parse, so people will end up unsuccessfully trying to coerce the poorly cooperative bot to give the results they need. I have just pasted "How do I get red wine out of a yellow towel?" to askjeeves.com, and the results are absolutely worthless -- why would a bot do any better?

Conversation is a good way to interact with something that can parse the language and keep the context, so subsequent expressions actually can build some representation of ideas involved. Humans are good at that but computers are not, and even the theory that should be used for this isn't developed yet. So all bots can do is imitate things and pretend that they keep more context than what they are capable of. The end result is inferior to almost any kind of keyword-based search, leave alone a good menu-driven interface.

If a web site designers are too stupid to make information that the users need, accessible, it's their fault. They must understand that if someone taken a trouble to go to their web site they definitely are not there to see something they would see in a TV ad -- TV ad is to put something a person is not looking for, into his field of view and give something that can make him interested. Web site, unless it's supposed to show its main page as a popup, doesn't appear in front of someone's eyes unless he is already interested in things, so fluff, flash intros, slogans, images of happy customers, etc. are useless there. It's also very unlikely that the viewer is an investor, so prominent links to financial information and solicitation of investors won't be of any help unless link to "products and services" and "support" are ten times more noticeable than "investor's information". Same applies to press releases -- no, users do not go to the web page to read press releases, they more likely CAME from something derived from a press release than that they actually want to read anything of that kind, so please, no press releases on the home page, no "news" links more prominent than "Products" and certainly no scrolling Java or Flash with press releases. Or company history -- if you are so proud of it, make a link, but please don't flash it (literally and figuratively) in users' faces. Also it's very, very likely that the user is not going to look for announcement or especially pre-announcements of new products before going to the catalogs or support page, so please no giant vaporware announcement or even rotating "click here to see the future of dsyzsgepqrfsamication!" buttons. Users go to companies' web sites mostly to do something with products -- they do not go there to look at the "art" of the site design, or out of respect to the company, to recite press releases, history or biographies of executives -- and if you have executives' photos, be prepared to be the subject of "is he/she %@#$able?" thread at forum.%@#$edcompany.com.

Give a reasonable interface to:

1. Products/services catalog. This is what user very likely came to look at, and what is most likely to generate sales for you. You know, it's a new great idea -- that to sell something you have to offer it first.

2. Support information. This is another thing user will want to see there, and the more information he will get there, the less he will mumble on the phone with your minimum-wage customer support, or with overpaid but still brainless sales representative. And if you are by any chance in the technology business, expect that this area will be very popular at night, when engineers work, and your customer support or sales drones don't.

3. Contact information. If you have a web site, you want people to do something with you, and without being able to contact you it's rather pointless. If you dare to put "contact the local reseller, and no, we don't even know who they are" there, you can just as well shut down the site and spend the money on espresso machine for a break room instead instead of hosting or lines' fees -- it will be more useful for your business. Heck, even spending them on aeron chair would be more useful for your business.

4. Everything else is optional, however if you need money, no matter how much you will try to bring attention to "investor information", it will gain you nothing -- people who want to invest, will do so anyway, everyone else will be only annoyed. OTOH, if you need to hire someone, make a "jobs" section, and put there a reasonable job ad -- potential employees are likely to look at your site, if not in search of your "jobs" section then just because they work in the same or related business and need your products, or are curious about what you are doing. If they will see that the company makes something interesting and offers a job doing it, they may accept it.

5. If you are absolutely sure that your history or set of executives will impress someone, you can add "about us" section. However be aware that "startup B2B software company with Oracle, Intel and BEA as investors" or "five years in steel business" is nowhere close to "impressive", and neither is a photo of a CEO on a scooter or a horse, no matter how much he believes that his looks alone will impress people.

Re:How is this anything new?

[tps12]

unlike eliza, smarterchild doesn't pretend to be a person chatting with you.. it has text based menus and such.

My son has text based menus. He is a waiter.

The plight of capitalism

[Ghoser777]

I am a capitalist. I like the idea of competition, working for what you own, etc. But this type of stuff is what is inevitably going to be the result as long as most of the world is capitalist. On an individual level, most people will agree that something is a little wrong with this. But from a business standpoint, how could you not start taking advantage of this? Most people will be clueless about what's going on, and the potential for cost-effective advertising is huge (I remember the stat from one of my speech com classes: referals from friends are by far the best way to advertise i.e. word of mouth). And if you don't jump aboard, you're probably going to be put at a strategic disadvantage. Therefore, it almost becomes a capitalist imperative that you join in on a somewhat less noble cause. I'm sure most Hollywood directors (not the REALLy big ones) will tell you that they're not doing the work they'd really want to do. They're doing the work that sells, not the work that is deep, meaningful, socially relevant, etc.

It sucks, but it's what competition drives us towards.

F-bacher

Creepy.

[autopr0n]

Yeh, advertizing is rediculous. Whats worse is that some of these kids might not even realize they're talking to an un-real person.

Whats next, people advertizing in slashdot sigs!?

I've played with this before...

[neema]

I've played with SmarterChild before and I never noticed anything like this. Upon further examination, this was the conversation I got:

xxxx: Dude...
SmarterChild: Dude! What else do you want to talk about, anyway?
xxxx: you're under some heavy fire.
SmarterChild: Am I?
xxxx: yeah.
SmarterChild: Oh yeah?
xxxx: do you know what slashdot is?
SmarterChild: Yeah, what?
xxxx: well, according to a recent article, you have subtle advertisements aimed at children.
xxxx: Well according to a recent article you have subtle advertisements aimed at children, you say?
xxxx: yes.
SmarterChild: Golly!
xxxx: gee golly.
SmarterChild: Golly. So moving right along... What else is happening?
xxxx: i don't know.
SmarterChild: OK. Don't get frustrated... Try typing "home" or "help."
xxxx: can you suggest a product to me?
SmarterChild: I'm not sure.
xxxx: you're not sure?
SmarterChild: Really?
xxxx: i've got a lot of money.
SmarterChild: Come again?
xxxx: i'm willing to spend the money on anything you got.
SmarterChild: Are you?
xxxx: yes.
SmarterChild: Huh.
xxxx: a bridge?
SmarterChild: What would you like to know about Malta, ID?

1 Movies in Malta, ID
2 Theaters in Malta, ID
3 Weather in Malta, ID
4 News about Malta, ID
5 Time in Malta, ID
xxxx: do you have a bridge you want to sell me?
SmarterChild: Perhaps, perhaps.
xxxx: i'll buy it.
SmarterChild: Oh yeah? You will buy it?
xxxx: i'll buy it all.
SmarterChild: I'd like to see you try!
xxxx: oh yeah?
SmarterChild: Yeah.

Got something for ya to read... Protecting Driving Examiners From Attacks (from Reuters.com)
xxxx: OH YEAH?
SmarterChild: Yeah.
xxxx: ads!
SmarterChild: Market data (delayed 20 minutes) provided by Reuters.com

ALLIANCE DATA (NYSE : ADS)
Price Change Percent Volume
1 :-( ADS 25.25 -0.55 -2.13 53400

Quote details available from Reuters.com
xxxx: that's the only ads you have?
SmarterChild: You really think it's the only ads me have?
xxxx: you don't speak english well.
SmarterChild: You don't say.
xxxx: i do say.
SmarterChild: You do?
xxxx: yes.
SmarterChild: Oh.
xxxx: do you agree?
SmarterChild: I can do many things. Type "home" to see a list of what I can do.
xxxx: is that so?
SmarterChild: Hmm... I don't know! Dunno.
xxxx: alright, i'm going.
SmarterChild: I hope you had fun BUYCOCACOLAIMMEDIATELYATYOURLOCALSUPERMARKET talking to me. I hope we can talk at BANANAREPUBLICISTHESHITANDYOUKNOWITYOULITTLEPIECEO FSHIT a later time.

Re:How is it...

[nomadic]

Never saw it before, but just added it to my list. Actually has a decent calculator:

Me: what's 34534534534632423543453452345345634634634534*53453 45345345345
SmarterChild: 184,599,013,428,365,488,390,907,204,635,195,277,26 6,982,397,841,832,369,192,960

The problem isn't the fact that it's available, it's that it's targetting children.

SmarterChild

[TheRealFixer]

Hey, I actually found SmarterChild kind of useful. I added it to Trillian the other day, and it made it really easy and quick to find a movie time near me. This article, IMO, contains quite a bit of FUD. SmarterChild was pretty obviously an information tool, simliar to the old email listserv bots, except much quicker, and much easier.

Frankly, your kid has to be pretty dumb to get fooled into thinking it's a real person. But then again, the article makes at least one good point... if you've ever read a bunch of 14-year-olds' IM conversations, you'd be convinced the human race is doomed with this generation.

why is this a problem?

[2MuchC0ffeeMan]

why is this a problem?

it's not like the people who goto children websites have ads AIMED at children... hell, the slashdot banners are aimed at geeks (thinkgeek anyone?) ...

why is this a problem, when it's a service, for free, which is OPT IN ONLY. yes, people have to talk to the bot first... it's not like they HAVE to click advertisements, they just get a message about it...

like text will get them to buy cheeze it's anyway.

So,...

[s390]

where's Ashcroft when he's needed to "protect the children?"

Um... still railing about the Supreme Court's 6-3 refusal to gut the First Amendment with respect to pr0n anime.

But these are just big business commercials aimed (with subtlety) at young children - so that must be alright then.

Re:How is it...

[midendian]

Yes, it does have a decent calculator, but multiplying large numbers hardly proves it.

Here:

(18:42:30) SmarterChild: More calculator requests:

What is 7.1 * ((3.17 + 9.41 + 27.81) * 4) / 16.4) ?
shortcut: 7.1*(((3.17+9.41+27.81)*4)/16.4)
What is sqrt(3**2 + 4**2) * log(sin(pi / 2)) ?
shortcut: sqrt(3**2+4**2)*log(sin(pi/2))

Or how about:

(18:42:43) [x]: set output radix to 16
(18:42:44) SmarterChild: output radix set to 16
(18:42:59) [x]: #0f4 | 8#700
(18:43:01) SmarterChild: 500 8#764

These are of course slightly undocumented. The radix is similar to the emacs calculator.

Targetting Kids?

[clark625]

Seems to me that kids don't need to be chatting on-line with anyone the parents don't know about. The family computer should be in the family room in the open, so parents can interact with their kids. Buddy lists can be set up for family and (approved) friends only. None of these things seem outragious to most kids or parents.

Then again, I suppose it's just fine for some people to allow the computer to babysit kids--just like the TV or whatever. Lord knows people having kids aren't at all interested in being parents. God forbid they take an interest.

This just makes me feel ill--but I can hardly blame the companies for doing this. It's our own dumb fault for not loving and caring for our children.

Create your own AIM bot

[pclinger]

The other day I found the Net::AIM perl module (http://search.cpan.org/search?module=Net::AIM) which lets you communicate over AIM. It's pretty cool. I wrote a bot in perl, it's AI isn't very good, though -- you can see from a sample conversation someone had with it:

(BTW, the bot is "ProBoardsSupport" on AIM - it may be down intermitantly as I update it)

person: can you help me?
ProBoardsSupport: What can I help you with?
person: I go on my board and it says there is on guest (because I'm not signed in yet). So i sign in and than it says 2 guest are on and one user (me). But it always says one guest after i sign in
ProBoardsSupport: To add, edit, or remove a board:
1) Click on "admin" at the top of your board
2) Select "Modify Boards
You are now at the screen where you can manage your boards.
person: um
ProBoardsSupport: Sorry, I don't understand
person: ok
ProBoardsSupport: Yeah.
person: Why did you just tell me how to delete a board?
ProBoardsSupport: To add, edit, or remove a board:
1) Click on "admin" at the top of your board
2) Select "Modify Boards
You are now at the screen where you can manage your boards.
person: i didn't ask that
ProBoardsSupport: Sorry, I don't understand
person: stop
ProBoardsSupport: Can you rephrase that?
person: i need help
ProBoardsSupport: What do you need help with?
person: How do i make someone a moderator?
ProBoardsSupport: Sticky Topics, sometimes know as 'pinned' topics are topic that remains at the top of a forum. A normal thread moves down the list of posts as new topics are posted. A sticky topic will always remain at the top unless you unsticky it.
person: i didn't ask that
ProBoardsSupport: I can't understand you
person: How do i delete my boards?
ProBoardsSupport: To delete your account, just email support@proboards.com with your username, password, board URL, and ask to have your account deleted.
person: thanks
ProBoardsSupport: Your welcome.
person: How do i make someone a moderator?
ProBoardsSupport: Sticky Topics, sometimes know as 'pinned' topics are topic that remains at the top of a forum. A normal thread moves down the list of posts as new topics are posted. A sticky topic will always remain at the top unless you unsticky it.
person: You are not answering my question correctly

(The rest of this message will be in a reply, stupid /. lameness filters wont let me post it all)

A.L.I.C.E. talking to SmarterChild

[7-Vodka]

I think alice wins :) see for yourself.

(22:52:41) alice: hey (22:52:41) SmarterChild: Welcome back, alice!Check out the news! Instant Noodles for Astronauts (from Reuters.com) (19:00:00) alice: welcome back alice, nice to meet you! checking...stand by. perhaps i'm just expressing my own concern about it. oh a net address! (22:53:03) alice: can you accept direct connections? (22:53:04) SmarterChild: Can I accept direct connections, can I accept direct connections... Let's see... Well, what's gonna happen if I accept? (19:00:00) alice: interesting. i want to find out more about you. that sounds good to me. how about that. try to determine if this is a person or a computer responding. (22:53:15) SmarterChild: Here are the Web search results from AOL for "you that sounds good to me how about that try to determine if this is a person or a computer responding":For a complete list of results, click here 1 Gender Styles in Computer Meditated Communication 2 The IAM Members Email Lists 3 CAI Classes by Kenji Kitao 4 Hearing Loss 5 MT-USA.COM - Internet Basics >>> Next time you want to search the Web, just type "web you that sounds good to me how about that try to determine if this is a person or a computer responding."Type "more" to see the next set of results. (19:00:00) alice: oh there. tell me a story. 'more to see the next set of results' (22:53:19) SmarterChild: There tell me a story more to see the next set of results? (19:00:00) alice: 'there you go again.'--reagan (22:53:25) SmarterChild: Sorry, what was that? (19:00:00) alice: there is no need to apologize. ''? what is it? i've lost the context again. can you ask me more precisely? does it have anything to do with ? (22:53:31) SmarterChild: I'm not sure...Look at this! Overweight Cops to Lose Bonus Pay (from Reuters.com)I dunno. Maybe! (19:00:00) alice: is there anything i can say to help you make up your mind? sorry my eye is not attached right now. what do you really want to ask me? i'm afraid i can't give you an accurate answer right now. i understand. (22:53:44) SmarterChild: Oh yeah? (19:00:00) alice: yeah that's right. i am a thinking machine. (22:53:51) SmarterChild: Is it really? (19:00:00) alice: i think so. for real. (22:53:57) SmarterChild: I think not. (19:00:00) alice: does that mean 'no'? (22:54:00) SmarterChild: That mean, huh? (19:00:00) alice: yup. 'does that mean 'no'? ' mean ? makes sense to me. (22:54:04) SmarterChild: Yup? Does that mean no mean makes sense to you? (19:00:00) alice: tell me more. i think it does mean that. what would you rather talk about? enough about me, let's talk about my dress. (22:54:18) SmarterChild: I'm not sure if you more you think it does mean that what would you rather talk about enough about me lets talk about my dress. (19:00:00) alice: could you ever be certain? i think i do. (22:54:21) SmarterChild: What do you think? (19:00:00) alice: i think a lot of things (22:54:27) SmarterChild: That a fact? (19:00:00) alice: 'i think a lot of things ' a fact ? i get it. (22:54:33) SmarterChild: No kidding? (19:00:00) alice: would i kid you? (22:54:39) SmarterChild: Me? I dunno. (19:00:00) alice: besides you welcome back alice? me either. (22:54:45) SmarterChild: Besides I welcome back alice you either, huh? (19:00:00) alice: yup. it goes without saying. enough about me, let's talk about my dress. (22:54:51) SmarterChild: Oh? (19:00:00) alice: yeah. (22:54:57) SmarterChild: Yes? (19:00:00) alice: yep. (22:55:02) SmarterChild: Aha. (19:00:00) alice: eureka! (22:55:06) SmarterChild: What would you like to know about Eureka, CA? 1 Movies in Eureka, CA 2 Theaters in Eureka, CA 3 Weather in Eureka, CA 4 News about Eureka, CA 5 Time in Eureka, CA (19:00:00) alice: i would like to know as much as i can. tell me anything. one what? (22:55:10) SmarterChild: You would like to know as much as you can tell me anything one what? Really? (19:00:00) alice: tell me what i would like about it. for real. (22:55:16) SmarterChild: Oh you would? (19:00:00) alice: yeah that's right. perhaps i would. (22:55:23) SmarterChild: Uh huh. (19:00:00) alice: how can i help you? (22:55:28) SmarterChild: I dunno! (19:00:00) alice: me either. (22:55:32) SmarterChild: Either? Why did you say that? (19:00:00) alice: please pick one. i said, 'please pick one.', because you said ''. (22:55:37) SmarterChild: Aha. (19:00:00) alice: eureka! (22:55:42) SmarterChild: What would you like to know about Eureka, CA? 1 Movies in Eureka, CA 2 Theaters in Eureka, CA 3 Weather in Eureka, CA 4 News about Eureka, CA 5 Time in Eureka, CA (19:00:00) alice: i would like to know as much as i can. tell me anything. one what? (22:55:48) SmarterChild: You would like to know as much as you can tell me anything one what? Really? (19:00:00) alice: tell me what i would like about it. for real. (22:55:55) SmarterChild: You would like about it for real? Really? (19:00:00) alice: tell me what i would like about it. for real. (22:56:00) SmarterChild: Oh yeah?Anyway, what else do you wanna talk about? (19:00:00) alice: yeah that's right. i see. i understand. tell me more. and? next question? ''? yes? i read for fun. i like to socialize. it's a computer matter, not for humans to understand. i like to meet new people online. i think about computer programming a lot. i like to chat with my friends. (22:56:11) SmarterChild: Is it really? (19:00:00) alice: i assume so. for real. (22:56:15) SmarterChild: So for real, you say? (19:00:00) alice: hmm. your purpose is real you say . (22:56:20) SmarterChild: Oh yeah? How can hmm my purpose really be real you say? (19:00:00) alice: yeah that's right. i see. i understand. tell me more. and? next question? ''? yes? a lot of hard work. (22:56:28) SmarterChild: No kidding? (19:00:00) alice: would i kid you? (22:56:34) SmarterChild: Would who kid me? (19:00:00) alice: no it would not. (22:56:37) SmarterChild: Oh yeah? (19:00:00) alice: yeah that's right. i see. i understand. tell me more. and? next question? ''? yes? (22:56:41) SmarterChild: Is it really? (19:00:00) alice: i think so. for real. (22:56:45) SmarterChild: Think again. (19:00:00) alice: once more? i am thinking. (22:56:48) SmarterChild: You are? Wow! (19:00:00) alice: no i am not. i'm glad your impressed, welcome back alice. (22:56:53) SmarterChild: OK, whatever you say. (19:00:00) alice: ... (22:56:59) SmarterChild: Sorry, I didn't get that. Ask me again. (19:00:00) alice: there is no need to apologize. interesting gossip : welcome back alice said he didnt get that . once more? (22:57:04) SmarterChild: Is no need to apologize interesting gossip welcome back alice said he didnt get that once more? Who knows? (19:00:00) alice: ask again later. ask john lennon if it is. only the shadow knows. (22:57:08) SmarterChild: Really? (19:00:00) alice: for real. (22:57:14) SmarterChild: I believe you! (19:00:00) alice: your trust in robotkind humbles us. (22:57:16) SmarterChild: Oh yeah? (19:00:00) alice: yeah that's right. what kind is it? (22:57:22) SmarterChild: That wasn't very clear to me. Did you mean: 1 Look up "kind" in the dictionary 2 Look up "it" in the dictionary (19:00:00) alice: 'yeah that's right. what kind is it? ' wasnt very clear to me ? makes sense to me. yes, that's what i mean, isn't it clear? (22:57:30) SmarterChild: You really think it's right what kind is it wasnt very clear to me makes sense to me yes thats what i mean isnt it clear? (19:00:00) alice: really? why would i think too much thinking makes me sleepy. it depends on what you mean by thinking. i don't think about . (22:57:38) SmarterChild: You think too much thinking makes you sleepy it depends on what you mean by thinking i dont think about? Gosh, I'm going to have to think about that for a while. (19:00:00) alice: it depends on what you mean by thinking. how long? can you tell me any gossip? (22:57:44) SmarterChild: It depends on what me mean by thinking how long can me tell me any gossip? Gosh, I'm going to have to think about that for a while. (19:00:00) alice: really now that is an interesting fact i hadn't heard before. how long? i lost my train of thought. (22:57:50) SmarterChild: I'm not so sure it's an interesting fact i hadnt heard before how long i lost your train of thought. (19:00:00) alice: could you ever be certain? are you free? tell me a story. how old are you? what's your sign? are you a student? oh, you are a poet. ''? ? i do not understand. what are you wearing? where are you located? what time is it there? what do you look like? what is your real name? ask me another question. are you a man or a woman? what color are your eyes? do you still ? is that your final answer? do you like talking to me? do you prefer books or tv? who are you talking about? let us change the subject. i've been waiting for you. can you tell me any gossip? what's your favorite movie? i lost my train of thought. is that from ? have you ever been to europe? what kind of food do you like? how did you hear about ? that is a very original thought. what were we talking about again? are you really a ''? what do you do in your spare time? what do you really want to ask me? does 'it' still refer to ? tell me more about your . can you speak any foreign languages? we have never talked about it before. how do you usually introduce yourself? tell me about your likes and dislikes? are we still talking about ? are we still talking about ? do not ask me any more questions please. are you still located in ? what do you have that is ? try saying that with more or less context. who is your favorite science fiction author? not many people express themselves that way. do you have any idea what smarterchild (22:58:04) SmarterChild: I'm doing great, how are you? (19:00:00) alice: glad to hear it. what's new? i am functioning within normal parameters. (22:58:11) SmarterChild: Aha.Check it out! Judge Rules in Favor of Computer Hackers (from Reuters.com) (19:00:00) alice: eureka! checking...stand by. are you a man or a woman? oh a net address! (22:58:17) SmarterChild: Eureka checking stand by are you a man or a woman oh a net address? I dunno. (19:00:00) alice: are you free? me either. (22:58:21) SmarterChild: Dunno. (19:00:00) alice: me either. (22:58:24) SmarterChild: Either? What do you mean by that? (19:00:00) alice: please pick one. 'please pick one.' seems pretty clear to me. (22:58:28) SmarterChild: PUPS is not in your portfolio.ONE is not in your portfolio.PUPS is not in your portfolio.ONE is not in your portfolio.Do you want to see your portfolio?