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Bionic Retinas Give Patients Sight

Posted by chrisd on from the implants-don't-poop-as-much-as-seeing-eye-dogs dept.

The Noof writes " Yahoo News is running a story about patients who have been given partial sight thanks to implants of silicon-based bionic retinas. " The article notes that the implant is having a "rescue effect" on the other components of the retina, restoring cells around the implant and making them useful again." Amazing stuff.

14 of 197 comments (clear)

  1. We have the technology by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    We can save him.

    Lose the arm.

  2. Was I the only one...? by doorbot.com · · Score: 3, Funny

    For some reason, I read this story's title as "Bionic Retinas Give Patents Sight" which I thought was a reference to issuing/implanting bionic retinas in USPTO employees so that they would be better able to read the rediculous patents which cross their desks.

    Maybe I could use a set of bionic retinas...

  3. Uh Oh... by NiftyNews · · Score: 1, Funny

    Maybe their super-vision can help add to the list of continuity errors in Spider-Man...

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    1. Re:Uh Oh... by I.T.R.A.R.K. · · Score: 1, Funny

      You're still pissed off about that whole genetically altered/radioactic spider confusion, aren't you? ;)

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      "Adequacy.org: Where congenital stupidity is not an option, but a requirement."

  4. Maybe they can give these to referees! by Hexray · · Score: 1, Funny

    I know a few calls where I would feel more comfortable if the refs had had these implants recently, if you know what I mean...

  5. I wonder... by maxmg · · Score: 1, Funny

    Will there be Linux drivers for those things?

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    I asked for a refund - and got my monkey back.
  6. Re:Improvements by Wylfing · · Score: 3, Funny
    Yes, if you look very closely at these bionic eyes you will see the words "Zeiss-Ikon" etched onto the irises.

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    Our intelligent designer has never created an animal that we couldn't improve by strapping a bomb to it.
  7. Re:Full Article Text by 0x0d0a · · Score: 5, Funny

    Yes, it would be awful if Yahoo got slashdotted, wouldn't it? Better post the article, just to make sure.

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  8. bionics? by phaserx · · Score: 1, Funny

    bionic eyes to help the blind.. hrmm.. where's the line to sign up and test the bionic penis??

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    1. Re:bionics? by damn+dirty+ape · · Score: 1, Funny

      a bionic penis might be dangerous for slashdot readers... too many broken hands testing it out

  9. Re:Cyborgs by ActiveSX · · Score: 2, Funny

    ...running on an AMD system

    Too bad we'd all die from heat exhaustion. Well, unless you want to have a liquid cooled rib cage.

  10. Re:Cyborgs by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    With a perspex window body mod, a neon light strapped to my aorta and a shelf for the beer, I'd be happy to let that liquid cooling double as my go-anywhere bar fridge.

  11. Talk about unthankfulness by xcomputer_man · · Score: 3, Funny

    From the article:

    "For another patient, though, the implant has been a bit sobering, Chow said. The patient, who has begun to recognize faces, was disappointed to see how his own face had aged."

    I can almost hear those doctors now. "Dude. You've been blind for many years, you were chosen to have your sight restored by a groundbreaking scientific process, and the only thing you can think about is how old you are?

    Get back on that operating table, I'm gonna yank that damn chip out your eye..."

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    Am I a hipster-doofus?
  12. Re:Full Article Text by Winged+Cat · · Score: 3, Funny

    I'd bet a sufficiently large Beowulf cluster of slashdot effects could take even Yahoo! down. ^_^