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The Boy and his Breeder Reactor

scubacuda writes "Here is an interesting tale about a Boy Scout who went a little too far in trying to achieve a merit badge in Atomic Energy. From smoke alarms, lantern components, the paint from radio clocks, and a little help from the Nuclear Regulator Commission, David Hahn attempted to build a nuclear reactor in his mother's shed. Regarding his excessive radioactive exposure, Hahn says, "I don't believe I took more than five years off my life."" While this is an oldish story (1998) it is not the pathetic self congratulatory lame princeton story.

15 of 340 comments (clear)

  1. The Hidden Joke... by Jucius+Maximus · · Score: 5, Funny

    ...this was posted in the hardware category.

  2. Yes but... by st0rmshad0w · · Score: 5, Funny


    ...could he split a beer atom?

    1. Re:Yes but... by bugg · · Score: 5, Funny

      The fact that 4 moderators recognized this quote from Young Einstein troubles me. Severely.

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      -bugg
  3. holy shit by tps12 · · Score: 5, Funny

    Man, talk about terrible parents. They locked him out of the house because they thought he was making drugs? No wonder he wanted to a-bomb the neighborhood.

    --

    Karma: Good (despite my invention of the Karma: sig)
  4. Re:really old by dfn5 · · Score: 4, Funny

    Yup, me too. It's a little old when Reader's Digest gets the jump on Slashdot.

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    -- Thou hast strayed far from the path of the Avatar.
  5. Interesting but... by jonerik · · Score: 5, Funny

    It's certainly an interesting story. In spite of being an incredibly stupid thing to do, the kid definitely earned his geek merit badge with his little stunt. "You installed Linux on your PS2? Hey, that's great - I built a breeder reactor out of old watches."

    Still, it's an old story. Maybe it's just a slow news day, but how is this particularly newsworthy?

  6. Radiation by sean23007 · · Score: 5, Funny

    "I don't believe it took more than 5 years off my life. The amount of years it took off the lives of my offspring, however, is yet to be seen..."

    --

    Lack of eloquence does not denote lack of intelligence, though they often coincide.
  7. The Scout Law by datastew · · Score: 5, Funny
    In a final indignity, some area scout leaders attempted (and failed) to deny David his Eagle Scout status, saying that his extracurricular merit-badge activities had endangered the community.

    A Scout is:

    Trustworthy,
    Loyal,
    Helpful,
    Friendly,
    Courteous,
    Kind,
    Obedient,
    Cheerful,
    Thrifty,
    Brave,
    Clean,
    and Reverent.

    I think the only thing they could fault him for is "Clean," but I'd give him bonus points for "Thrifty." Makes me proud to be a Boy Scout.

    1. Re:The Scout Law by Spencerian · · Score: 5, Funny

      Perhaps "Irradiated" might fit now, too.

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      Vos teneo officium eram periculosus ut vos recipero is.
  8. heh, heh by smoondog · · Score: 5, Funny

    Quoate 1: Finally, David, whose safety precautions had thus far consisted of wearing a makeshift lead poncho and throwing away his clothes and changing his shoes following a session in the potting shed

    Quote 2: the house was rocked by an explosion in the basement. There they found David lying semiconscious on the floor, his eyebrows smoking. Unaware that red phosphorus is pyrophoric, David had been pounding it with a screwdriver and ignited it.

    Quote 3: David pulverized the ores with a hammer, thinking that he could then use nitric acid to isolate uranium. [...] David made his own [nitric acid] by heating saltpeter and sodium bisulfate, then bubbling the gas that was released through a container of water, producing nitric acid. He then mixed the acid with the powdered ore and boiled it, ending up with something that "looked like a dirty milk shake."

    Quote 4: Another year, David was expelled from camp when [...] he stole a number of smoke detectors to disassemble for parts he required for his experiments.

    This kid is a walking advertisement for the Darwin Awards ...

    -Sean

    1. Re:heh, heh by Dephex+Twin · · Score: 4, Funny
      This kid is a walking advertisement for the Darwin Awards ...

      Yeah, but the "walking" part is what keeps him from winning one.

      mark
      --

      If you want to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first create the universe. -- Carl Sagan
  9. What would you do with your own atomic reactor? by Dark+Paladin · · Score: 5, Funny
    Just a small list:

    • Pipe the radiation at the nads at those guys who feel the need to drive by your house at 2:30 AM with their base pounding loud enough to shake windows.
    • UPS? We don't need no UPS!
    • Take it to bed with you on those cold, winter nights.
    • Who needs a fridge when you can kill all the bacteria just with putting it in the "shed" out back for a few minutes?
    • For that matter, forget the stove.

  10. This teaches me to trust no one by Ilan+Volow · · Score: 5, Funny

    Yesterday at Wal-mart I saw a suspicious-looking guy wearing a"Death to America" T-shirt buying up all the smoke detectors. I just assumed he was overzealous about fire safety.

    --
    Ergonomica Auctorita Illico!
    1. Re:This teaches me to trust no one by sean23007 · · Score: 4, Funny
      In related news, Vice President Dick Cheney has announced that the country should be on full alert of a possible nuclear attack on American soil in the near future, adding that there is no reason to believe it could happen, just that we need to be more careful. Attorney General John Ashcroft followed with a press conference condemning all manufacturers of smoke detectors, calling them "domestic terrorists" and adding them to the until now rather exclusive membership of the "Axis of Evil." Effective noon tomorrow, all smoke detector factories will be shut down, and anyone attempting to purchase a smoke detector from any such radioactive material dispensing locations as "Walmart" or "Kmart" or "Target," etc, will be arrested on the spot and handed over to the military until such time as they can be tried, or the War on Terrorism is over. "Whichever comes first," said Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld, who recently submitted an application to President George W. Bush to change the name of his department from the old, boring name of "Department of Defense" to something more exciting and relevant, such as the "Department of Capture, Murder, and Torture of Foreigners." Also included as options in his application were "Department of Sexy Guns" and "Department of Kiss My Ass, You Foreign Scumbags !" Rumsfeld requested that the exclamation point be emphasized rather heavily, as it added a certain levity to the situation, which he prefers, as it puts him in the proper mood to bomb those filthy targets.

      That should be an article in the Onion, shouldn't it? Hehe... :)
      --

      Lack of eloquence does not denote lack of intelligence, though they often coincide.
  11. Splitting the atom? by ZaneMcAuley · · Score: 4, Funny

    "the house was rocked by an explosion in the basement. There they found David lying semiconscious on the floor, his eyebrows smoking. Unaware that red phosphorus is pyrophoric, David had been pounding it with a screwdriver and ignited it. "

    Hmmm i think ill split this atom i found. *gets screwdriver, hammer...*

    wap
    wap
    wap

    *KABOOM*

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