Mobile Phone in Your Teeth!

thumbtack writes "News.com is running a story that reports that British researchers claim to have developed an implant that could be placed in a tooth and used as a mobile phone. According to the article, the sound would be transferred to the inner ear by bone resonance, and could be listened too anytime anywhere, with complete privacy." This is awesome. Course it would kinda suck if your phone rang when you were asleep.

Comments

Upgrades?

[The Turd Report]

Upgrading to the newest version would be a pain in the ass^Wmouth.

Microwave exposure?

[splorf]

I thought holding the antenna too close to your head with a normal cell phone increased your exposure. Having the phone in your tooth sounds like really asking for it. Maybe the tooth phone could do double duty though. If your food has gotten cold, the phone microwaves could re-heat it while you're chewing.

And imagine the advertisements...

[TellarHK]

New Nokia T1, smallest cellular phone ever! Just stick this fan-cooled battery in your cheek so it won't burn your skin, change it every day, and talk gingivitis away!

And just imagine the new acronyms they'd be coming out with. Portable Lightweight Audible Query Using Electronics, voice activated to!

Get PLAQUE implanted and never miss a phonecall again!

How about a boob phone?

[aussersterne]

After all, in the next round of TV commercials, would you rather stare Jamie Lee Curtis in the tooth, or...

Bluetooth?

[raduga]

It seems it should be easier to keep the handset in your pocket (easier for dialing, antenna, etc) but put a wireless intradental headset for speaker/mic.

Presumably, a filling in the space vacated by cavities. Should be the best use of bluetooth we'll see...

Very limited uses..

[ldopa1]

I see a large number of problems here:

1) I have two phones - one personal, the other for work. Would I have to get two implants? Then, how would I answer one, but not the other? OTOH - If I did this, a conference call would be a cinch.

2) What happens when I need to change from Sprint to AT&T? Do I have to go back to the dentist? Can I sell my old Sprint implant?

3) So how would I surf the wireless web? (Very big lately)

4) What about programming my phone book?

5) Wouldn't getting screwed by your telco now REALLY leave a bad taste in your mouth?

6) If I set the phone to ring "silently", it might just kick loose a filling or to.

7) I don't think anyone I want to talk to would appreciate me snacking down on a hoagie while I'm talking to them, which is almost the only time I get lunch.

8) I'd have to change toothpaste. I'm sure my Colgate Total isn't supposed to be used on electronics.

9) I don't think anyone would buy it, because then they wouldn't be able to say "I wasn't by the phone." Also, can you imagine some of the phone calls? Phone calls in the bathroom, in the shower, while -um- massaging yourself?

and finally...

10) I wouldn't be able to tell between the lunatics talking to God and a Fortune 500 CEO in a conference call. Particularly with the number of well dressed wackos in the world.

This is by far the worst idea I've heard yet.

Wake up kent!

[MobyDisk]

This is Jesus Kent, and I've been a very naughty boy... And one last thing: STop playing with yourself.

I'll be very disappointed if noone gets the reference to the greatest geek movie ever made (okay, maybe next to War Games)

"Real Genius"

[faqBastard]

Is anyone else reminded of the scene from "Real Genius" ?

Kent.
This is God.
You've been a very naughty boy.
...
I want you to think about what you've done. And until then, STOP PLAYING WITH YOURSELF.

:-)

Re:Great idea, but use as a general-pupose trancei

[The Turd Report]

Good idea, but there had better be some good encryption and security in place. Or some evil haxor might start beaming 'Take Me Down to Funkytown' in a loop to your head.