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Moon Rock Winds Up In Court
Lothar+0 writes "In United States v. Lucite ball containing lunar material (an actual case, I'm not making this up, folks), the feds are suing to get back a moon rock from an American who brought it back from Honduras. They're alleging that this rock from the Apollo 17 mission is stolen property; ironic considering that NASA took something that wasn't under U.S. jurisdiction."
What the moon rock... is cooking!
"Awww, Ricky! I brought this souvenir back from Honduras and accidentally swallowed it! And now the whole country is suing me! Aaaaaahhhhhhwwwwww! Aaaaahhhhwwww! I should have known there was something suspicious when the souvenir seller in the black suit called me Mrs. Ricardo before I introduced myself! Hoow ddoooo I gett iinn theeese thiinngs! Aaaaaahhhwww!"
To the original owner, that is. If we "stole" it from international territory, then it's forfeit to the original owner, right? Which is to say: the moon. Let's bring that sucker back and put it where we found it.
Any excuse to fire rockets into space is a good one if you ask me.
It's rare that you're presented with a knob whose only two positions are Make History and Flee Your Glorious Destiny.
It has the right to remain silent, and the right to an attorney.
See? The Miranda Rights even apply to lucite balls containing lunar material!
Whoever stated that signature sizes should be limited to one hundred and twenty characters can just go ahead and kiss my
Documentaries such as Enemy of the State have accurately portrayed the elaborate, byzantine network of surveillance satellites that the liberals have sent into space to spy on law-abiding Americans. Equipped with technology developed by Handgun Control, Inc., these satellites have the ability to detect firearms from hundreds of kilometers up. That's right, neighbors .. the next time you're out in the backyard exercising your Second Amendment rights, the liberals will see it! These satellites are sensitive enough to tell the difference between a Colt .45 and a .38 Special! And when they detect you with a firearm, their computers cross-reference the address to figure out your name, and then an enormous database housed at Berkeley is updated with information about you.
Of course, this all works fine during the day, but what about at night? Even the liberals can't control the rotation of the Earth to prevent nightfall from setting in (only Joshua was able to ask for that particular favor!) That's where the "moon" comes in. Powered by nuclear reactors, the "moon" is nothing more than an enormous balloon, emitting trillions of candlepower of gun-revealing light. Piloted by key members of the liberal community, the "moon" is strategically moved across the country, pointing out those who dare to make use of their God-given rights at night!
Yes, I know this probably sounds paranoid and preposterous, but consider this. Despite what the revisionist historians tell you, there is no mention of the "moon" anywhere in literature or historical documents -- anywhere -- before 1950. That is when it was initially launched. When President Josef Kennedy, at the State of the Union address, proclaimed "We choose to go to the moon", he may as well have said "We choose to go to the weather balloon." The subsequent faking of a "moon" landing on national TV was the first step in a long history of the erosion of our constitutional rights by leftists in this country. No longer can we hide from our government when the sun goes down.
by 70%
don't you tell me that! i'm an investor and i bought 1000 sq km of moon property from a growing IPO that gave me a really neat brochure that told me all about it. I'll sue you if you try to take my land! I'll defend it like sealand! Just you wait and see. I'll have my space laser up there ready to blast anyone away from my country except those who bring trade to my provence. Now... To just find the right funding to actually make everything I just said above possible... Hey Microsoft!!....
$5 million for 1.142-grams of moon rock? In Detroit they "moon rock" and "moon dust" for $10-$40 per gram.
"You know you don't act like a scientist, you're more like a game show host." Dana Barret
Maybe NASA can tap this lucrative new source of revenue to fund ambitious missions of exploration. I'm hoping that bits of Mars start showing up on Ebay within the decade!
United States v. Lucite ball containing lunar material (an actual case, I'm not making this up, folks)
Uh-oh. Lucy's getting sued by the government? Ricky's never gonna let her play with the band now!
I'm sure there are plenty of people who would take a rock from their backyard, encase it in a Lucite ball and sell it on eBay if they thought people would fall for it. Heck, from the looks of the photo, that could be a piece of dried dog poop.
Let's take it one step further: Nixon wanted to placate the Honduran dictator without giving him anything of real value, so he had some of Checkers's excrement encased in a futuristic-looking Lucite ball. Deliver it with a plaque and you have a great joke to tell your friends. In fact, I'll bet that's what he was talking about during the famous gap...
There's an insurance company, who, in exchange for premiums, was dum^H^H^Hwilling to fund a NASA lunar sample retrieval mission in the event of theft, accidental loss, or destruction...
C'mon, NASA, this isn't rocket science... uh... lemme rephrase that.