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Lazy Musicians Spawn Robot Ukulele
densetsu writes: "Three weeks ago, instead of forking over 5 whole bucks for an actual ukelele instruction booklet, I decided to teach myself for free using internet resources.
Now that my will (and fingers) have been broken, these guys offer a faustian shortcut. They built a Lego Mindstorms-powered REMOTE CONTROLLED self-playing ukulele. The site has some nice photos and mindstorms code. Rock super-stardom, here I come!"
Noos fo da nahds, stof dat mattahs.
I have been pwned because my
Lazy Open Sores Programmer Spawns Goatsex
When was the last time you had an "E" Cup in your:
- Hand?
- Mouth?
When was the last time your "Rod" was between two huge Melons?
Huge, Heavy, and Happy - http://www.bigandbouncing.com/
I'm not a big reggae fan, so correct me if I'm wrong, but since when does reggae music include ukulelies (sp)? Could you imagine "No Woman, No Cry" (the only reggae song I know) played with a ukulele?
Very odd...
"Anyway, long story short... is a phrase whose origins are complicated and rambling...." - Abraham Simpson
Credits: onby
1. Introduction
As everyone knows, Open Source software is the wave of the future. With the market share of GNU/Linux and *BSD increasing every day, interest in Open Source Software is at an all time high.
Developing software within the Open Source model benefits everyone. People can take your code, improve it and then release it back to the community. This cycle continues and leads to the creation of far more stable software than the 'Closed Source' shops can ever hope to create.
So you're itching to create that Doom 3 killer but don't know where to start? Read on!
2. First Steps
The most important thing that any Open Source project needs is a Sourceforge page. There are tens of thousands of successful Open Source projects on Sourceforge; the support you receive here will be invaluable.
OK, so you've registered your Sourceforge project and set the status to '0: Pre-Thinking About It', what's next?
3. Don't Waste Time!
Now you need to set up your SourceForge homepage. Keep it plain and simple - don't use too many HTML tags, just knock something up in VI. Website editors like FrontPage and DreamWeaver just create bloated eye-candy - you need to get your message to the masses!
4. Ask For Help
Since you probably can't program at all you'll need to try and find some people who think they can. If your project is a game you'll probably need an artist too. Ask for help on your new Sourceforge pages. Here is an example to get you started:
"Hi there! Welcom to my SorceForge page! I am planing to create a Fisrt Person Shooter game for Linux that is going to kick Doom 3's ass! I have loads of awesome ideas, like giant robotic spiders! I need some help thouh as I cant program or draw. If you can program or draw the tekstures please get in touch! K thx bye!"
Thousands of talented programmers and artists hang out at Sourceforge ready to devote their time to projects so you should get a team together in no time!
5. The A-Team
So now you have your team together you are ready to change your projects status to '1: Pre-Bickering'. You will need to discuss your ideas with your team mates and see what value they can add to the project. You could use an Instant Messaging program like MSN for this, but since you run Linux you'll have to stick to e-mail.
Don't forget that YOU are in charge! If your team doesn't like the idea of giant robotic spiders just delete them from the project and move on. Someone else can fill their place and this is the beauty of Open Source development. The code might end up a bit messy and the graphics inconsistant - but it's still 'Free as in Speech'!
6. Getting Down To It
Now that you've found a team of right thinking people you're ready to start development. Be prepared for some delays though. Programming is a craft and can take years to learn. Your programmer may be a bit rusty but will probably be writing "hello world" programs after school in no time.
Closed Source games like Doom 3 use the graphics card to do all the hard stuff anyhow, so your programmer will just have to get the NVidia 'API' and it will be plain sailing! Giant robot spiders, here we come!
7. The Outcome
So it's been a few years, you still have no files released or in CVS. Your programmer can't get enough time on the PC because his mother won't let him use it after 8pm. Your artist has run off with a Thai She-Male. Your project is still at '1: Pre-Bickering'...
Congratulations! You now have a successful Open Source project on Sourceforge! Pat yourself on the back, think up another idea and do it all again! See how simple it is?
- poopbot: crapflooding since 7/8/02
Ukelele's are such simple minded instruments (don't get me wrong, I've passed many the doobie to a nice Oo Ka ley ley song).
This is evidenced by the fact they could implement this with and RCX
For a real system, you're better writing it in on an Atmel 8 bit RISC microcontroller One friggen instruction per cycle. Not a few hundred or so.
using one of the nice embedded C Compilers
Geez does that Basic code look silly!
loop [
waituntil [switch 11] play_note 85 1 1
waituntil [switch 11] play_note 84 1 1
waituntil [switch 11] play_note 84 1 1
waituntil [switch 11] play_note 82 1 1
waituntil [switch 11] play_note 84 1 1
waituntil [switch 11] play_note 84 1 1
waituntil [switch 11] play_note 85 1 1
waituntil [switch 11] play_note 73 1 1
waituntil [switch 11] play_note 73 1 1
With an AVR, you could play the music like the Gypsie Kings with one processor! I'm talking multiple 12 strings!
You wouldn't need a beuwolf cluster..
But, it would be pretty cool.
All kidding aside, I wish I had the time to do this kind of stuff. Writing Java code for "Big Business" gets very boring, though, it feeds my family.
Wow, now we're one step closer to having giant robotic animals sing *AND* play instruments for us at Chuck E. Cheese!
no, technically a guitar is an insect.
Is it really necessary to mod him down as a troll? I think the name kinda gives it away...
damn, i guess potheads DO have some type of motivation in this world.