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am i still banned i wonder...
fp fp fp fp fp
woot!
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a01
Evil sues self. Film at 11.
Version 1.1.8 (last updated 19th July 2002 by Anonymous Coward)
Note to moderators : Do not moderate this post down, if you do then you support the editors stance on censorship and you support the end of free speech and support evil organisations like Microsoft, RIAA, MPAA and laws like the CBTBA and DMCA
Sign this petition, let your voice be heard!
Slashdot is using censorship! It is trying to eridicate free and open discussion like we know slashdot to be, it has the following RESTRICTIONS in place to Censor you
They claim they don't, but they do, wonder why their are so many trolls, crapflooders and lamers on slashdot, because they are fighting for their rights! Slashdot is trying to silence the trolls. Remove the filters, the trolls get bored, and slashdot will be troll free!
- Lameness filters (It blocks a lot of legitmate posts)
- Unnessary posting delays. Hasnt taco learned to touch type? A lot of posts are typed in less than 20 seconds and it is a ANNOYING DELAY! 2 minute ban? Come on, so some are faster then others, big deal, some people have more to say than others
- Broken moderation system, The whole point is to sort the gems from the crap, yet a lot of posts designed to make a LIVELY DISCUSSION are MODERATED as flamebait! Come on, not everyone likes X, but just because some one bashes it dosent mean its Flamebait. Flame bait is more useful for DIRECT INSULTS and not legitmate discussions.
The "troll" moderation reason is fragmented and broken, why? Because they are trying to use an obsolete usenet term on a realtime discussion, "trolls" can cover a huge blanket of ideas.- Crapfloods, a meaningless flood of random letters or text, which the lameness filter does a crappy job at trying to stop, besides trolls have written tools using the opensource slashcode to generate crapfloods which bypass the filter
- Links to offensive websites, the most common one is known a http://www.goatse.cx, a awful site which shows a bleeding anus being stretched on the front page. Trolls sneak these links in by posting messages that look legitimate, but infact are sneaky redirects to the site. Common examples include rd.yahoo.com, www.linux-kernel.tk, goatsex.cjb.net, and googles "Im feeling lucky".
- Trying to break slashdot, this is actually a good thing, as it helps test slashdot for bugs. Famous examples include the goatse.cx javascript pop-up, the pagewidening post and the browser crashing post!
Subnet banning, this bans a user unless they email jamie macarthy with their mp5ed ipids. This is unfair, and banning a subnet BLOCKS A WHOLE ISP SOMETIMES, and not that individual user! This can cause chaos! But real trolls use annoymous proxys to get around this so THIS JUST BANS LEGITMATE USERS! Also, they are trying to censor some anoymous proxies, mainly from countrys like africa, so this yet more DISCRIMINATION!But, the issue that concerens us the most, is the COMMENT QUOTA. A discrimatory system that stiffles discussion, cripples the community and will ultimateley destroy slashdot unless it is removed! Annoymous cowards are allowed only 10 posts a day! This is unethical! Users with negative karma only get two! That is DISCRIMINATION! How would you like to only be able to speak once a day, just because of the color of your skin. That would be racism, and slashdot is discrimitating on people just because of a negative number in a database! BOYCOTT SLASHDOT! LET THEM DIE!
We wan't these stupid useless restrictions REMOVED! This comment will be posted again and again until it does!
Inportant imformation for users
Boycott slashdot, they are pissing over their community, they are becoming like the RIAA and MICROSOFT! Do NOT TOLERATE THIS SHIT! Here are some real news for nerds sites. We don't need slashdot, slashdot deserves to die!
MSNBC
BBC NEWS
News.com
Linux online
Linux daily news network [linuxdailynews.net]
Weird news from dailyrotten.com
Trollaxor, news for trolls, they are real people too!
CNN.com
New york times (free registration required)
LINUX.com
News forge
K5
Mandrake forum
Toms hardware
The register
Kde dot news
The linux kernel Archives
Adequecy
There are hundreds more, But this is where slashdot STEALS THE MAJORITY OF its "news" from.
Punish them, here are their emails, spam them, flame them goatse them!
Rob malda
Jamie Macarthy
ChrisD
Hemos
Micheal
Pudge
The others ones apperantly dont have an e-mail, probably because ROB MALDA IS PRETENDING HE IS JOHN KATZ.
Thank you for reading this, please feel free to repost this information, please reply to add your comments, fight slashdot and its CENSORSHIP
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- posted by poopbot: because we're all crapflooders at heart
6xun4b3NQx Post #306
Intelligent use of the Moderator system....
Mod the first 5 posts as +1 Funny.
(If you don't believe me, see above)
Is this a form of rebellion, or just laziness?
Intelligent use of the Moderator system....
Mod the first 5 posts as +1 Funny.
(If you don't believe me, see above)
Is this a form of rebellion, or just laziness?
I'm asking a serious question, here. Is there really a reason to mod this post away to oblivion (as it was five minutes ago).
Someone else who recommends Denny's cheese sticks!
Though, I beg to differ on one point. A chocolate shake is the only possible companion for a basket of cheese sticks.
As many of slashdot's regular readers know, VA Software - owner of this weblog - are in big financial trouble. With the current volatility in the stock-market and downturn in the US economy, there can be little hope of saving anything from the wreckage of VA Linux. It is highly unlikely that slashdot could be sold to another company - the weblog market is overcrowed and the manifest failure of the moderation/karma system will surely seal its fate.
That is where you - the reader - step in, slashdot's editors will soon be looking for new jobs and they need your help. Please post possible career options in a reply to this post. We wouldn't be able to offer a cruiser as a prize this time but the best suggestions will win a lifetime's supply of toilet paper, courtesy of Larry Augustin's stock options.
A few notes: there are some obvious jobs that slashdot's editors would love - donkey sperm extractor or human toilet - but do bear in mind that, as the opensource movement demonstrates, a hobby you love may not translate into gainful employment. Also don't insult the editors by suggesting jobs they couldn't possibly do; I'm thinking particularly of anything requiring basic english skill or skill in proper computer languages like C.
009
Please read this Jamie. You need improvement.
LESSON ONE
I am not sure if it was because I grew up in a household with
brothers or whether I would have had the same feelings and
inclinations had I been an only child but I do know that from the
time of my earliest memories I have been fascinated with penises.
Let's talk about the "basic penis." I regard oral sex as the
highest form of expression of love that can be exchanged between
two people. Hopefully this information will help you to break down
any barriers which you might have that would prevent you from
expressing your love in this way and from receiving a
reciprocation from your male companion.
First things first. LOOK at the cock. I do not mean a
cursory glance not a hurried, surreptitious examination. Take
enough time that you convince your companion that some kind of
treat is in store for him provided he will allow you to do with
him, and particularly with his cock, exactly what you want.
Place him flat on his back on your bed, in a well lighted
room. Take his cock in your hand and LOOK at it. He probably will
not have the will power to stay soft, but then again you are
worshipping his very essence. Few men can stay soft under these
circumstances, when it is apparent that the person LOOKING at his
cock is worshipping.
When you first start to touch him, his cock will become hard
and be in a state where your examination will be meaningful.
Wouldn't it be nice if going to the doctor for an examination was
as enriching?
The cock must be hard if you are to be able to note the
important parts-those parts sensitive to stimulation by your lips
and tongue.
The first thing you will note is whether or not he is
circumcised. Circumcision is not universally practiced: there are
advantages and disadvantages to penises in both conditions from
the standpoint of providing oral caresses that bring the highest
kind of delight to your man.
Next take a close look at the shaft of the penis itself.
There is a bulbous part of the organ near the outer end, slightly
larger in diameter than the shaft, which is often called the head.
Technically this is the glans penis (comes from the Latin glans
which means acorn. Look at it closely; does kind of look like an
acorn doesn't it?)
The outside perimeter of the glans penis is the corona. This
joins the head to the shaft. This is the most sensitive spot on
the penis. It is toward this ridge that you will direct most of
your attention when you are giving head. Follow this ridge around
to the underside of the penis. You know that I like to call it the
underbelly. I am particularly fond of the underbelly!
You will notice a point of juncture where the two ends of
this irregular circle come together. If your partner is not
circumcised, this will also be the point where the foreskin is
attached. This tiny area is easily the most sensitive spot on his
entire body, and it is possible to bring your partner to climax
simply by gently tapping the tip of your tongue directly on it.
Spend time caressing the glans and those areas immediately
surrounding it.
Beneath the glans is the shaft of the penis. The shaft does
not have many nerve endings and does not, therefore, provide a man
with any high degree of stimulation when caressed either manually
or with your tongue to the exclusion of the glans penis itself.
It always amazes me to note the number of confirmed cocksuckers
who believe that sucking up and down on the shaft will get the guy
off. That's not it folks! If it works it is because the back of
your throat is playing tricks on his glans penis. Your throat is
giving head to his head!
Beneath the shaft are the testicles (balls, jewels, call
them what you like, but let's not ignore their significance). The
testicles are extremely sensitive to pain and are not usually
considered subject to erotic stimulation to any particular degree.
Not true! You can add a high degree of pleasure for him by paying
the right kind of attention to the balls!
Now lets go back to the shaft of the matter. The opening in
the tip of the glans penis is the meatus. Here is where the cum
spurts. (I could have said semen is ejaculated but I did not want
to sound too professional).
There are other parts of a man's body which respond with
alacrity to oral stimulation.
Many men are particularly sensitive around the nipples. The
first time I kissed my partner's nipples he shot before I had the
chance to even get near his cock. While I have not been able to
duplicate this in the laboratory setting (he hates to go near the
lab with me) my partner still gets extremely turned on by my
lingual nipple caresses.
So LOOK at your partner's penis. Study it. Learn its areas
of special sensitivity completely and be ready to apply your
knowledge to his body with your tongue and with your lips when you
bend your loving head over his cock. There is nothing that you can
do which more clearly shows your love for him than the worship you
can provide his cock!
LESSON TWO
The sad fact is that most people, men and women, do not have
the slightest idea of how to suck cock. Most seem to think that
simply by making a cunt of their mouth, closing it around a man's
penis, and bobbing their heads lustily up and down until he
climaxes automatically makes them expert cocksuckers. Au
contraire!
Consummate skill is required to suck a man's cock and
provide him with the highest degree of pleasure possible. When I
first started my quest I really had no one to turn to for advise
and counsel. It was all hunt and suck. Hunt and suck. Find that
one technique that could and would set him on fire! I had to
learn from my experiences and while I would not want to deny you
the innate pleasure that these experiences will bring I would hate
to see you lose a great companion because of your inexperience and
lack of expertise.
Let's assume that you have taken that opportunity to LOOK at
his penis. To explore each area of the penis to find the most
sensitive parts. That you have gotten beyond "Parts is parts" and
recognize that some parts are more equal than others.
In order for you to observe your man's reactions and get the
most information possible about his responses try the following:
While his erect penis points toward the ceiling, cup his
balls in one hand and gently, using only your tongue, lick softly,
but carefully along the entire underside of his erect organ. As
you suck along the underbelly you will learn those areas that give
him the greatest pleasure when your tongue is touching them.
Unless he is made of stone, your partner will provide you with
vivid clues as to which areas are most pleasurable.
As you discover these areas of enhanced pleasure concentrate
on them. For most men the most sensitive area will be the point
where the ring (or corona) of the head and the foreskin are
attached. Or were attached prior to his circumcision. By
continued licking and tapping along this area with your tongue you
are going to bring forth a geyser. If you are not skilled and you
want to please him in a hurry I suggest that you get him off in
this manner in order to become familiar at first hand with the
nature and delight of his climax.
As he is getting ready for climax you will note changes in
his penis. These signs will be the same every time he climaxes so
that you can prepare for his cum properly. The head of the cock
may swell somewhat larger then it is during the normal course of
his erection. He may thrust his hips forward as he wants to send
his
body hurtling out his cock with his cum. And for most men,
immediately prior to the cum, there will appear at the tiny,
lovely lips at the tip of the cock a clear drop or two of fluid.
When you see this or feel the opening at the meateus through his
condom you know that the moment of truth is at hand. Launch the
torpedoes, full cum ahead!
Where should you be when you are sucking his cock? Between
his legs, on top of him, in a sixty nine position? Where?
Because of the structure of his penis, as well as the structure of
your mouth, lips, tongue, and teeth, you can provide the highest
degree of sensation to yourself and your partner by kneeling
between his legs and approaching his cock from the bottom rather
than from the side or the top. Don't believe me? Try the various
positions (I describe in later chapters techniques to be used with
each position). See what works best for you and your partner.
LESSON THREE
Place his stiff cock inside your mouth but do not tighten
your lips around the shaft. With your head begin a circle motion.
The cock will slide to different places in your mouth as you
continue the circle motion. Watch your teeth on this one. A
kneeling position will suffice but it is also effective when your
partner is on his back and your head is directly over his cock.
The circle should be executed in both clockwise and
counterclockwise motions in a slow purposeful manner. I found many
guys in New York who seem to prefer this technique above all
others. I met one guy who could circle a cock for hours and I
found myself having multiple orgasms while his mouth circled my
cock. I didn't lose my hard-on after each cum. When the technique
is performed correctly it means many hours of unadulterated
pleasure.
LESSON FOUR
With your man sitting in an elevated position and you on
your knees in front of him lift his hard cock to reveal his balls.
With your tongue find the underside of his balls. Now, while
resting his balls on your wet tongue, lick in an upward motion to
the very tip of his cock. It is permissible to use your hands in
this technique. It is bettor to do this technique several times
in succession-like licking a lollipop or ice cream cone. I grew up
down south. And one thing about.southern boys. We learn early how
to get if off quickly when the need is there. And the lollipop
lick is the one technique in this book which few men can tolerate
for long periods of time without cumming.
LESSON FIVE
Right now lets discuss a technique that is probably the
most common cocksucking technique in the world. Take his cock in
your mouth but not deeply. We will get to deep throating later
on. It's great, not over-rated, but if you want to be an expert
at deep throat start with the right techniques and work your way
down, so to speak.
Take his cock in your mouth by sliding your moistened tongue
lovingly over the head until your lips close around the shaft at
the point just behind the corona. Don't just open your mouth and
close it around his cock. Slide it in. He will enjoy it much more.
Encase the shaft of his penis with your hand. Remember the
shaft is relatively insensitive to any kind of stimulation. By
enclosing his penis with your hand you give him the sensation of
having his penis encased.
Now you have several options. Try twisting your head from
side to side making sure your moist lips stay in contact with the
coronal ridge. While doing this gently move your hand up and down
the shaft. When he climaxes he may want to push your head further
down the shaft of his penis. He wants to envelop you with his
cock. As you are learning his climax you will miss the fine points
if you deep throat at this time. Instead gently suck around the
corona as he climaxes so that you can intensify his pleasure and
increase the force of his orgasm.
As you gain more experience you will be able to tell exactly
when his climax is approaching and you will be ready for that
initial spurt out the rubber.
LESSON SIX
There is one further refinement to this basic technique
which will heighten his orgasm. If you place your thumb at the
very base of the penis in such a way as to block the tube through
which the cum spurts, the semen cannot escape even though he is
spasming and going through the reflex action of ejaculating semen.
If at the same time you suck vigorously on the head of his
cock you can delay his cum for several long moments. When you
finally allow the cum to spurt it will last much longer and be
just as intense as a result. Even though you delay the cum for
only a few short moments you will be surprised by the intensity of
his cum.
These techniques are the basis of cocksucking. Do not go
beyond them until you have become an expert, not only in the
techniques themselves, but also in the reading and interpreting of
your partner's responses to such a point that you know exactly how
he is getting off on what you are doing. When you have reached
this point, you are ready for the more subtle, more advanced
techniques.
Don't be so slavish that you miss out on the fun of self
discovery. Find out what works for you and for your partner and
make your cocksucking as individual as your signature. After all,
you want your man to pick you out in the dark among hundred
slobbering cocksuckers.
LESSON SEVEN
One of the first things you encountered when you first
started to suck cock was a gag reflex. Most men seem to want to
force their cocks down your throat as far as they can get it.
Particularly at the moment when they cum!
Consider for a moment that the average length of your oral
cavity is three to three and a half inches while the average
Caucasian cock length is five to five and a half inches. The laws
of nature would seem to dictate that getting all that cock into
your mouth is an impossibility.
It can be done. You probably know someone who can do it and
that is why you purchased this book to begin with. It is possible
to master the necessary technique. I don't want to be boring, but
if you understand your anatomy you will begin to understand the
requirements that allow you to take his hard cock into your mouth
and down your throat. The biggest obstacle to taking all of his
cock down your throat is the fact that there is a bend of almost
ninety degrees behind your tongue leading down into your throat.
So the first thing to do is get the cock past that angle.
Get past the angle of the dangle!
In order to practice this, get in a position where you can
turn your head in such a way that your mouth and throat lie almost
in a straight line. The best position to accomplish this is to lie
on a bed so that your head is near the edge with your body
sprawled across the bed so that your head is tipped sharply back.
This position will put your mouth and throat nearly in a line and
will allow your partner to approach you in such a way that
insertion of his cock can be made so deeply that his pubic hair
presses against your lips.
LESSON EIGHT
Today we will practice mastering physical reaction that must
be alleviated before the art of deep penetration can fully be
enjoyed. The natural tendency of the body to gag when a foreign
object such as a deeply thrusting cock being forced down your
throat. You can overcome this tendency by completely relaxing
your throat at moment the insertion is made. It is equally
important that you maintain this relaxation during the entire deep
throating.
Let him put his cock down your throat and hold it still
while you find the most comfortable way to proceed. Because of
your position you will not be able to move or to offer him any
greater stimulation than simply keeping your mouth tightly closed
around his throbbing cock. If you are able try to stimulate his
underbelly with your tongue, do it!
You will only be able to relax and take his cock in this way
if you completely thrust your partner. Your partner is in full
control. He must initiate and maintain all the motion. This is
the only exercise in which you relinquish your control of the
situation to your partner. He will relish this for the simple fact
that for the first time he can insert his cock as deeply down your
throat as he wants to. Now your partner begins an in and out
movement that is just like fucking. He should start slowly,
especially if this is a completely
new experience for the two of you. After all if he hurts you he
cuts himself off from one of the great pleasures in life. His
only other requirement during this exercise is to keep the motion
in the same direction throughout this oral exercise as there is
simply no leeway for him to vary the motion from side to side.
One other word of caution.
Don't let your partner get carried away at the moment he
starts to cum. At that spectacular moment he will be able for the
first time to thrust his cock all the way inside your oral cavity
and that is the most important lesson of this exercise! His only
other requirement during the exercise is to keep the motion in the
same against your lips as he cums. Because of your position in
bed you will not be faced with the problem of swallowing his cum.
And this is not just because he has a condom on his dick. The
reason is because he has gotten his cock BEYOND your gag reflex!
Without the rubber his cum would shoot directly into your stomach!
If both you and your partner understand what it is that you are
trying to do as well as the possible problems that may "cum" up
along the way no harm or discomfort will happen to either of you.
It is possible that not everyone will learn the "deep
throat" technique but this inability does not make you any less a
cocksucker. You must allow your throat to relax completely while
your partner is thrusting his cock this deeply down your throat.
To do this long enough for your partner to completely get it off
is very difficult and may require practice beyond this day. It
may be that you will be able to take your partner completely down
your throat, but you will not be able to maintain proper
relaxation of your throat to until he shoots his load. Hopefully
your partner will understand that this is not a rejection of him
or of what he is offering you, and it is my sincere desire that
you not stop here and think that you will never master the "deep
throat" technique.
Continue to practice this lesson. I know couples who have
devoted ten months to this lesson alone. Continue to practice
this technique because your practice will allow you to take his
cock deeper into your throat each time and for longer periods of
time. Ultimately you will succeed. If you have the desire you
will get this one down pat!
LESSON NINE
Now lets turn to another portion of your partner's anatomy
which should not be ignored-the family jewels. Here are two
objects which can enhance your partner's feelings more than any
other. Many people do not think of the balls as primary sexual
objects. Many men are extremely sensitive and just as in lesson
eight there must be a certain amount of trust built up between the
two of you before he will willingly let you have undisputed use of
these two pearls of delight!
For today's lesson begin by gently licking his balls with
your tongue. As your partner becomes more trusting you may begin
to play with his nipples with your fingers gradually increasing or
decreasing the intensity as you gauge how he is responding. You
may want to gently caress his cock with your hand while you are
bathing his balls with your tongue.
Remember that the balls are extremely sensitive to pain and
he will lose his trust in you if you do not respect any limits he
places on them just as you have the right to place limits on the
back of your throat until you are completely ready to receive him.
It is possible once you have built up this trust to take
both his balls in your mouth. He will be more receptive to this if
you thoroughly wet them with your tongue prior to taking them into
your mouth. Unless your partner is into the new fad of complete
body shaving he will have tiny hairs on his testicles. By giving
the balls a complete tongue bath prior to taking them into your
mouth, you will have pressed these hairs down along the surface of
the sac and will not inadvertently cause pain by pulling on them.
This may seem a small lesson but you will discover an
entirely new world of sensations for your partner when you take
the time to get to know his testicles!
LESSON TEN
I hesitated to include this into your lesson plan but
finally I decided that if you are aware of the most safe way to do
this technique that my responsibility for giving you the tools to
be the best cocksucker you can be will be satisfied.
Analingus.
Putting your tongue to his anal opening.
Ass sucking.
Before you even consider doing this, make certain that your
partner is clean. Immediately out of the shower. Place a piece of
Saran wrap over the butt. At no time should your tongue come into
contact with the anal surface itself.
For this lesson place your partner on his back with his legs
in the air and his knees close to his shoulders. This spreads his
buttocks apart and allows you access to his butthole.
You are probably under the impression that actual
penetration of the asshole itself is necessary for your partner to
receive the most complete enjoyment of this technique. Not so
mojo! The nerve endings around the anus itself have no
discrimination and you will get him off just as well and as
thoroughly by licking around the area as if you stick your tongue
up his butt!
As with some of your other lessons this technique will not
usually be enough to get him to cum, but I feel that it is
important to know all aspects of your partner's body in order to
give him the most complete pleasure you can. You may find that
after many hours of oral pleasure you need to have other areas to
concentrate on in order to give him the satisfaction he deserves.
Analingus is a powerful stimulant and when combined with
other activities such as vigorous hand stimulation on his cock
will cause a rapid and powerful cum!
LESSON ELEVEN
For most of our lessons the only thing required is yourself,
your partner, and a condom. Maybe some Saran wrap. A plastic glove
or two. Well, another toy that will enhance your pleasure is a
mini-
vibrator. For this lesson you may want to start with your finger.
Then as you and your partner become more accustomed to each other
you may find him a little intrigued about the vibrator and what it
can do for him.
As you are giving head begin a slow playful search around
his
ass. Many men are particularly sensitive in this area and it will
enhance the sensations that your mouth and tongue and throat are
giving his cock to feel a finger playing with his butt. As your
partner relaxes and allows you access, gently insert your gloved
finger into his butt. Go slowly exploring the velvety sensations
along the sides of his opening.
When your finger is inside his asshole completely you will
be at the area of the prostate gland. Massage of this gland by
your finger will produce some of the most delightful sensations
your partner has yet to experience. I remember going to the
doctor for a physical the first time I felt this sensation. I
could hardly wait to get home and have my partner try it out on me
again. While it was a bit embarrassing to cum in the doctor's
office, the feelings that the doctor inadvertently produced were
so strong that I wanted to experience them again and again!
A gloved finger is really all that is required for this
lesson. However some members of the Cocksuckers Club of America
report to me that a mini-vibrator works exceptionally well for
this type of stimulus. It is just the same length as the average
finger and due to the vibrations that it produces the sensations
against the prostate gland are even more enhanced!
If your partner likes this stimulation you must then
discover which method he likes best. Some men prefer an in an out
movement with the finger or the vibrator while others do not. I
personally find this painful--too much like a stab in the dark. I
prefer the finger or vibrator to be placed against the prostate
gland and left there to do its most. Whichever method your partner
prefers is the one you should use.
One other point. When your partner cums there will be a
natural tendency for him to push the finger or vibrator out of his
asshole. The asshole muscles are spasming and anything in the way
will be forced out. But to maximize his pleasure you must not let
this happen. Hold your finger or the vibrator firmly in place--
this will help to stimulate the sperm production to its maximum.
Many people have questioned me about a vibrator around the
cock itself. Does it add to the sensation or not?
It does for my partner, it does not for me. That seems to be
the consensus of opinion of other readers of FRENCH CUISINE
MAGAZINE as well. I suggest as long as you have the vibrator handy
anyway, try it around the penis. When you are licking his balls.
When you are licking his asshole. If he gets off on it, then feel
free to use the vibrator around his dick and balls. If he hates
the sensation obviously don't try it again.
LESSON TWELVE
There are times when you will want to get him off in a
hurry! I always say that Southern boys learn this one first and
then expand their repertory from that point. But because I want
you to become an expert at all aspects of oral lovemaking I
deliberately waited until now to introduce this technique. It
differs from lesson four in that you are a more consummate
cocksucker now. He will love it all the more if he realizes that
this is not the only trick you have down your mouth!
It is a very simple technique and if you understand your
partner's basic cock anatomy you will grasp this one easily.
Place your lips around the head of your partner's cock and twirl
your lips wetly and gently around the coronal ridge at the back of
the head of his penis. This does not require any great
cocksucking skill and it works simply because this is the area
that is most sensitive on your partner's cock.
It is not necessary to be a skillful cocksucker. All that
is necessary is for you to find the most sensitive area around the
coronal area. By sucking on this area of his cock continuously
you will produce a quick powerful cum. It is not necessary to bob
your head up and down on his cock to get him off. One other use
of this technique is to get him hard again after he cums and you
will soon find him rip roaring to go
again.
LESSON THIRTEEN
Don't be surprised if you find yourself going back to this
lesson for seconds. We discussed briefly at the end of lesson 12
a technique to get him going again if he has recently cum. Today
after you have gotten your man off, lets concentrate on some
techniques to get him back on again. Not just to get him hard but
to keep him hard. Hard enough to want to cum again!
After he has cum you may need other techniques to keep him
hard and to keep him interested. Many men (not all but a good
portion of us) are exhausted by a single cum and while it is
possible to get your partner up again you have a long way to go
before you get him to cum again.
Cocksucking alone at this time is usually not enough to get
him off. You will need to combine some of the techniques you have
learned earlier with your basic cocksucking technique to stimulate
the juices for a second and third go around. Don't hesitate in
your exploration of his body at this time. His nipples, his balls,
his asshole. His armpits. His earlobes.
For the second cum you are free to really get into his body
and explore all those erotic areas that you missed when you were
concentrating on his cock exclusively. His navel. His toes.
One of the things I find most exciting about the second cum
is the lack of expectation that you must get him to climax within
a certain time frame. You have all the time in the world to
really give his total body a complete tongue bath. You can
explore his body safely and completely and really get to know the
total body as well as you know his delightful dick! This is
merely a sign that you are becoming a true connoisseur of
cockflesh. A title I am proud to hold.
LESSON FOURTEEN
Soixante-Neuf
Sixty Nine
Sixty nine is not always the perfect way to provide your
partner oral satisfaction. Inadvertently one of you will "let up"
your end of the cocksucking in order to experience the subtle
pleasures the other partner is giving you. For this reason I have
included it as the final lesson. Many people think that the deep
throat technique is the ultimate pleasure you can give your
partner. Actually I believe that sixty-nine is the ultimate
pleasure.
Done correctly and unselfishly when both of you are
completely in tune with each others innermost desires, the sixty
nine is the ultimate. But because of the problem mentioned earlier
in this lesson, most people practice it too early and it becomes
an intensely satisfying experience for one partner at the expense
of the other. When you are completely on each other's wavelength
you will discover that this is the most effective way of giving as
well as receiving pleasure.
The element that must be in place is simple: Both of you
must
be consummate cocksuckers! If you have a partner who is not in
the least interested in giving head and only likes to receive it
then to attempt sixty-nine is to ask for unhappiness in your
relationship.
TECHNIQUES
As editor of FRENCH CUISINE MAGAZINE I sometimes send out
questionnaires to our members to find out more. I question them
about their desires, and their favorite ways to practice safe and
sane oral sex
Here are some of the most popular variations on cocksucking.
THE BUTTERFLY FLUTTER
The best position for this very sensuous cocksucking
movement is kneeling over your partner. If he is on his back kneel
between his legs. Or kneel in front of your partner while he
stands. I like this position because the cock feels thicker in
your mouth and throat and you have complete freedom to play with
his balls while performing this maneuver.
This technique was first introduced to me by a cocksucker in
northern California. There was a notorious movie theater in
downtown San Francisco with a darkened balcony. A cocksucker's
haven. And this guy had us lined up. You knew from the moans
emanating from the guy's throat who was getting his cock sucked
that this guy was that one in a thousand who knew how to please a
variety of fresh cockmeat. It felt so good that I studied him
closely while he was sucking cock. Not only did I observe the guys
who were getting the radical suck, but I got down close to the
cock and observed how he was maneuvering around it. He created the
basic vacuum pressure on the cock but only enough pressure to pull
the cock into his mouth ever so slightly.
With his lips firmly wrapped around the guy's big swollen
cock head and shaft he would gently flick the tip of the cock with
his tongue. With his lips open around the cock at a depth so that
he could touch the tip of the cock with the tip of his tongue.
With his lips around the cock shaft he would make an up and down
movement with his tongue. He would flutter his tongue up and down
the tip of the cock.
I recommend you try it. It will drive your Butterfly Flutter
partner back into your mouth at any hour you want him there. After
several minutes of this continue with the basic vacuum suck.
THE TRAVELING FIGURE EIGHT
After you have become comfortable with the basic vacuum suck
and you have become accustomed to his cock deep in your mouth and
throat try this action. It is guaranteed to take his
breath away. With your lips firmly wrapped around the cock shaft
try very slowly to reach the base of the shaft or as close to it
as you are comfortable. Your nose should be buried in or at least
touching the pubic hairs at the base of the cock.
With your nose trace a figure eight as if the figure eight
were lying on it's side. Your figure eight motion should be three
to four inches long. Slowly travel up the shaft of the cock to
the head, doing the figure eight motion. Keep doing this motion
and let your lips firmly travel up and down the cock shaft. Do
this for as long as you are comfortable with it. Believe me your
man is floating in orbit as his wildest dreams of the ultimate
blow job are coming true.
I give credit for this most erogenous technique to a member
of "The Cocksuckers Club of America" who lives in Oregon. He and
his partner were on vacation down in Southern California and they
visited me while here. After seeing him scrape his partner off the
ceiling when he did the Traveling Figure Eight, I rushed right
into my bedroom and perfected it on my own partner! When you get
tired of the movement slow down and return to the basic vacuum
suck.
By this time you are becoming more and more confident with
your partner. His cock feels great as it fills your mouth and
throat. The cock is becoming harder and warmer as your warm moist
mouth and throat create friction by going up and down that big
beautiful cock. It is time to cool his tool just a little with
this technique.
I take full credit for this one myself! From tho time I hit
puberty I was fascinated by cocks. Big ones, little ones, cut
ones, uncut ones, crooked ones, straight ones. All shapes, all
sizes. I wanted to feel them down my throat! Combine this very
basic love of cocksucking with an inherent fear of not being able
to take cock and completely satisfy the customer and you can
imagine how I felt. I needed a technique that would feel good in
my mouth and would feel good for my partner. Here's what I came up
with:
Go down on the cock shaft as far as you are comfortable. All
the while your lips should be firmly wrapped around the shaft.
Open your mouth as wide as you can and suck in as much air as your
lungs will hold. While sucking in air let your open mouth travel
up to the cock head. Your up stroke motion should end at the head
of his cock just as your lungs fill with air. Now with your mouth
still open let the air in your lungs out slowly through your mouth
as your opened mouth travels back down the cock shaft. This
technique cools the cock on the up stoke and warms the cock with
your hot breath on the down stroke. Do this movement as long as
you like then return to the basic vacuum suck method.
CONGRATULATIONS!
You are doing just fine and he loves it!
Keep it up as long as you are comfortable with it.
For his added pleasure and to give you something to play
with reach up and fondle his balls. Or go up even further and
play with his nipples. This will give him something else to
concentrated on so he doesn't pop his cock yet. If you feel he is
about to cum stop what you are doing and let him cool off for a
few minutes. After all you are having fun and you want to enjoy
his cock as much as you can until you get tired of it. Then let
him pop his cock! But not yet. He likes it too much and he wants
it to last as long as you can keep it going.
THE CIRCLE
Place his stiff cock inside your mouth but do not tighten
your lips around the shaft. With your head begin a circle motion.
The cock will slide to different places in your mouth as you
continue the circle motion. Watch your teeth on this one.
A kneeling position will suffice but it is also effective
when your partner is on his back and your head is directly over
his cock. The circle should be executed in both clockwise and
counterclockwise motions in a slow purposeful manner.
THE LOLLIPOP LICK
With your man sitting in an elevated position and you on
your knees in front lift his hard cock to reveal his balls. With
your tongue find the underside of his balls. Now, while resting
his balls on your wet tongue, lick in an upward motion to the very
tip of his cock. It is permissible to use your hands in this
technique. It is better to do this technique several times in
succession-like licking a lollipop or ice cream cone.
As many of slashdot's regular readers know, VA Software - owner of this weblog - are in big financial trouble. With the current volatility in the stock-market and downturn in the US economy, there can be little hope of saving anything from the wreckage of VA Linux. It is highly unlikely that slashdot could be sold to another company - the weblog market is overcrowed and the manifest failure of the moderation/karma system will surely seal its fate.
That is where you - the reader - step in, slashdot's editors will soon be looking for new jobs and they need your help. Please post possible career options in a reply to this post. We wouldn't be able to offer a cruiser as a prize this time but the best suggestions will win a lifetime's supply of toilet paper, courtesy of Larry Augustin's stock options.
A few notes: there are some obvious jobs that slashdot's editors would love - donkey sperm extractor or human toilet - but do bear in mind that, as the opensource movement demonstrates, a hobby you love may not translate into gainful employment. Also don't insult the editors by suggesting jobs they couldn't possibly do; I'm thinking particularly of anything requiring basic english skill or skill in proper computer languages like C.
010
I wouldn't hire a VA "Software" employee to empty my cat's litter box.
Hey ESR! How are those stock options working out?
Hey ESR! How are those stock options working out?
Interestingly, he's using them to line his cat's litter box.
Every year during my review, I just pray the words "slashdot.org" aren't mentioned.
Intelligent use of the Moderator system....
Mod the first 5 posts as +1 Funny.
(If you don't believe me, change your threshhold and check the first 5 posts)
Is this a form of rebellion, or just laziness?
I ama homosexual. I boughtan Apple computer because of its well earned reputation for being "the" gay computer. Since I have become an Apple owner, I have been exposed to a whole new world of gay friends. It is really a pleasure to meet and compute with other homos such as myself. I plan on using my new Apple computer as a way to entice and recruit young schoolboys into the homosexual lifestyle; it would be so helpful if you could produce more software which would appeal to young boys. Thanks in advance.
with much gayness,
Father Randy "Pudge" O'Day, S.J.
Twist it. Twist it good.
Bitch slap that Jobs. He is a bitch she woman.
Break his little faggot glasses in half.
Shove them up his rectum.
Bitch slap that woman named Jobs.
Make him bark like a dog. Bitch.