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If Programming Languages Could Speak

Posted by michael on from the if-C++-screams-in-the-forest,-does-it-make-a-sound dept.

HealYourChurchWebSit writes "BurningBird's "The Parable of the Languages" offers a delightfully playful answer to the the question, "[what] if programming languages could speak, really speak, not just crunch bytes and stream bits, they would have much to say that is both wise and profound.""

12 of 352 comments (clear)

  1. Info requested by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic
    OK, this post might require a little tolerance from moderators. Yes, you'll be tempted to mark it offtopic, but how about showing a little restraint -- this should be an interesting side-topic for all of us to share.

    And -- if you mod this down -- rest assured I'll refer it to M for a possible bitch slap...risk your karma at your own leisure.

    That said...

    Over the past few weeks, Slashdot has obviously been experiencing significant database problems, the latest of which occurred late this afternoon. For hours, posting, searching, and customizing functions were unavailable.

    I run a site using MySQL. My traffic is certainly not "Slashdot" level at this point, but it's within striking distance, and, as it grows, I just wonder: what are the database problems Slashdot is encountering, and are any of these problems applicable to me?? Am I heading down the wrong road? Does MySQL not scale past a certain point? Should I look into other (postgres, etc.) solutions?

    I'd like the Open Source community (of which OSDN and Slashdot are card carrying members) to contribute a little post-mortem info to the rest of us??

    Respectfully, but inquisitively,

    -jlrowe

    1. Re:Info requested by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

      It seems to me that unless you have some compelling reason not to port your web application to PostgreSQL, you should start doing so. The consensus of opinion is that PostgreSQL is superior to MySQL is virtually every way, including speed in most situations. (For interesting real-world info, refer to this well-known article.)

      Both MySQL and PostgreSQL are totally free, and both support the core SQL command set. In general, PostgreSQL supports more features than MySQL, so in some ways you can consider PostgreSQL to be a superset of MySQL.

      I have done all of my unfunded web application programming with PostgreSQL for about four years now, and I can't say I've regretted it for a minute.

      Good luck.

  2. /. first post by dagamore · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    nothing to add, just a first post :()

  3. Dumb by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    If programming languages could speak?? What are they smoking? Me thinks it's a slow news day.

  4. Re:Screaming by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    Or if they weren't careful they would get a sack full. Please be careful.

  5. Re:Screaming by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    But we are all trolls. Are we not?

  6. Re:C by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    If programming languages could speak, they would say that Fox Network is retarded for cancelling this week's John Doe, etc other shows. Stupid baseball. Who watches it anyways?

  7. Re:Screaming by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    Not me.

  8. Re:Screaming by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    Nor I.

  9. Re:Screaming by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    Yes you are. We all know you are. Why do you deny it, and stay in the troll closet?

  10. I love this! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    The only people that get modded up are either post a link or the whole article in their post, bash any other OS out there, or say down with RIAA like the football cheer in Bill and Ted's Adventure. You guy are sick buckwheats that pride your self on being 31337 in your own little world. Their are a few smart people here, but they are not the masses so the "My Linux box rules you windblows" get the mod point, as an example observe that this is at a -1 for troll or something. This site is like censorship, just at a community level. In stead of one person deciding what is allowed or not, this web-community comes up with a little clause stating that the /. community will decide what interesting for the rest. This can be related to the KKK since they also let certain things be said or done for the "good of the community" Oh well just another day.

    And for my close I can just say BYTE ME!

  11. My love hate relationship with the match makers, by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    love them for the right match til you die or
    hate them for matching what rather would stay unmatched.