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England Salutes 150 Years of Eccentric Patents
jonerik writes "Want to patent a moustache protector? Or perhaps you've hit upon the idea of improving chickens' lives by giving them eyeglasses. Well, don't bother - they've already been invented. The BBC has this piece today on the bizarre ideas that have trickled into the U.K. Patent Office on a regular basis since it opened 150 years ago this month. Other doozies which are saluted are a rifle fitted into a helmet, 'the recoil [of which] broke a man's neck during early trials' and the parachute hat. According to Steve van Dulken, who oversees the patent archive at the British Library, 'For every 100 applications lodged, I'd say that 10 are a bit whacky.'"
has finally figured out step 2 for the underwear gnomes:
1. Steal underwear
2. Get wacky Brittish Patent
3. Profit!
III.IIVIVIXIIVIVIIIVVIIIIXVIIIXIIIIIIIIVIIIIVVIII
m00.
My favourite is the patent about attaching a wind turbine to the roof of your car to take advantage of a resource that, otherwise, goes completely to waste :-)
Here's a funny one...
One click electronic buying, oh wait..
From the article
It must have seemed like a great idea at the time: an alarm to be fitted inside a coffin, just the thing to guard against premature burials.Why is this a bad idea now?
...and 100 years later, geeks are still having trouble figuring out just exactly how to remove the damn things.
Correction: I should say, Just exactly how to get near the damn things.
There is no spork.
It's too bad they don't try to make some patents on personal privacy. I was over there doing some low level databse consulting work for Lloyds of London last year and I was totally freaked out by all the video cameras everywhere. You can't blow your nose without the Queen getting you on video doing so.
Still, it still didn't stop me from tossing some bland half-cold fish-n-chips into the street. The Brits may be good at inventing stuff but they need to spend a little more time learning how to season their food in my opinion.
Warmest regards,
--Jack
Wagner LLC Consulting Co. - Getting it right the first time
Something about a way to connect most of the industrialized nations in the world in order to better exchange information and form a community....naaaaaaaah. Way too idealistic. It'd never work (It still doesn't work if you ask me).
Zech Harvey, MCSE, MCDBA, CCNA
Why am I not surprised that when you get something like the Prior-Art-O-Matic from the UK that they would take it just one step too far.
The terrorists will pick them up, put them on and run into battle with American Forces(TM). First shot fired; they fall to the ground with a broken neck! War over!
America's Freedom Force(TM) - 1, Axis of Evil(TM) - 0.
Game Over, man
This idea is patent pending ©2002 Teamhasnoi. Unauthorized use will be turned over to Panip, Inc.
If only Screech was prematurely buried, then the luscious Kelly would be mine AT LAST!
When I first read the title, I thought England was saluting 150 years of eccentric PARENTS.
After white folks discovered embalming this was no longer a problem. If whatever was supposed to have killed you in the first place didn't do the job, odds are that:
- Having an artery in your shoulder exposed and used to pump formaldehyde and methanol through your system
- Having a cannula stuck down your throat to aspirate the contents of your lungs and stomach and replace them with embalming fluid
- Having that same cannula inserted into your rectum for the same purpose
- Being chilled at 33 for a day or two
would probably finish you.
Am I the only one who heard Roxette to sing "I'm gonna get blitzed for some sex"?
Well excuse us for being confused by your unnecessarily complex and misleading names.
Oh - I though it read 150 years of Eccentric pants Which could be a celebration coming up if you look here.
Jesse Wolfe Sr. Manager Systems Integration
They're spectacles, you unbespectacled freaks!
true && more || less
Four words: IP over pneumatic tube.
Here
I especially like the "Horse Masturbation Preventer". (Seriously, look at the page!)
One day, growing bored with the stasis that eventually overtakes most Monopoly games, I changed the rules to allow hostile takeovers. IIRC, it went like this:
If all of one property group are under single ownership, it's immune. But if you land on a property that's not yet owned as a complete set, you can force the owner to sell by paying them 3 times the standard price.
Needless to say, money flew around the table as if propelled by a hurricane.
~REZ~ #43301. Who'd fake being me anyway?
'For every 100 applications lodged, I'd say that 10 are a bit whacky.' ... which is itself a whacky way of saying that 1 out of 10 applications is whacky.
Don't EVER make this mistake in Glasgow!
Thats right, scots are puffters that'll lift their skirts at you!
According to Steve van Dulken, who oversees the patent archive at the British Library, 'For every 100 applications lodged, I'd say that 10 are a bit whacky.' And, of course, the other 90 are crap :)
I suspect a more than a few devolutionists (and Welsh!) would take exception to that suggestion. But what do I know, I'm an American. From America. The country. Of America.
(Enough of that, moving on...)
Actually, it was because a months-long journey in a pine box under the hot southern sun would yield a gooey pile of rancid flesh delivered to the family, which was considered highly disrespectful.
Just tell them it was a war injury.
"Damned Confederates used one of them nasty acid cannons on him, Mam."
Table-ized A.I.
No reason to get snippy about it. People who live in the UK are not the only ones who have to deal with this sort of thing.
For instance, I live in New York. No, not New York City. There's a whole state called New York, only a small fraction of which (area-wise, that is -- about 50% population-wise) consists of New York City. But try and explain that to people who don't live in the Northeast US, never mind people who live in other countries. To them, "New York" is just one giant superdense concrete-and-glass jungle.
No, I do not ride the subway to work. No, I do not worry about being mugged every day. No, I do not live in a high-rise building. No, I didn't vote for Mike Bloomberg; I'm not allowed to, only NYC residents are. Get it?
Downmodding is the refuge of the weak. Don't downmod, make a better argument!