Slashdot Mirror
Handshake via the Internet
mattlamb writes "British and American scientists will touch using sensors over the internet. "The implications of the experiment could be vast, said UCL, which describes the event as the world's "first transatlantic handshake over the Internet." " Let the juvenile comedy
commence!
Porn Stocks Skyrocket!
(/local/home/curiosity)-#who -u|grep thecat|cut -c 44-49|xargs kill -9
Somehow the idea of sex with 50ms latency doesn't sound so appealing...
say old chap, that's not my hand...
and thus teledildonics became a reality.
To quote Lum The Mad from his current site:
If successful, it could allow people to touch and feel each other over the Internet.
Dear god, NO.
Att can ressurect thier Ad reach out and touch someone
"first transatlantic bitch-slap over the Internet."
...hardware handshaking!
I bet the UCL side will have a hand buzzer http://www.gagworks.com/gwp_0235.htm
Read Epic the first RPG novel.
now all we need is smell-o-vision moniters and the whole experience can be done over the net.
1. develop internet touch sensors
2. start porn site
3. ?XXX?
4. Profit!!!
"You can not only feel the resulting force, but you can also get a sense of the quality of the object you're feeling -- whether it's soft or hard, wood-like or fleshy."
One would hope this could be discussed without immediately putting your mind in the gutter, but with quotes like this, it's impossible. It's obvious what these scientists are really trying to develop.
...
that one of them is a practical joker.
American Scientist "And that concludes this historic First Ever Trans-Atlantic Handshake."
Brit scientist (to his buddies) "He he, he thinks the glove is on my hand!"
There are 01 kinds of cars in the world. The General Lee, and everything else.
From the article: "You can not only feel the resulting force, but you can also get a sense of the quality of the object you're feeling -- whether it's soft or hard, wood-like or fleshy."
There's no way I believe that quote wasn't designed for maximum comedic potential.
Now I can NOT get any action from women all over the world!
tcp wrapper...heh heh heh
My debut novel AMITY now available: http://jeremydbrooks.c
"Shake, partner!"
[stretches out hand]
"Psyche!"
[deftly runs hand through hair]
Mike van Lammeren
It will challenge your head, your brain, and your mind.
"If successful, it could allow people to touch and feel each other over the Internet."
So will 'ping' now be replaced by 'poke'? Gives a new meaning to the term 'finger' on IRC and other communication systems
Insert Sig Here
Can't wait for the followup story: "Script kiddies hack robot hands -- scientists recovering in hospital after repeated punches to the face"
"I'm a leaf on the wind. Watch how I soar."
-Hoban Washburn
I was gonna maintain the moral high ground (HA!) and not go for the obvious pr0n joke, but then, the best thing that could be said was already in the article....
"You can not only feel the resulting force, but you can also get a sense of the quality of the object you're feeling -- whether it's soft or hard, wood-like or fleshy."
This signature is a waste of 42 characters
Spam will not just annoy, but now send you to the doctor.
"Mom! A pop-up ad poked my eye again. I'm bleeding!"
Table-ized A.I.
Pull my finger!
This story reminds me of a concept a friend shared with me a few years back... he was interested in how much people would pay to shock him remotely over the 'net, and watch the reactions. He had the concept of a web-camera on him constantly, so that you could deliver the shock and watch the results...
Sample scenarios:
* eating cereal... ZZZzzzttt... milk everywhere
* on the bowl... ZZZzzzttt... poo everywhere
* frosting a cake... ZZZzzzttt... frosting everywhere
(etc, ad nauseum)
This is also the guy, however, that said he wanted to be buried with a webcam, so that people could watch him decompose over time, but that's another story altogether...
Blunder of the Ages
By Reporter AC
WASHINGTON (Reuters) - In what amounts to a new twist on an old and venerable tradition, Senator Trent Lott (R) accidentally kissed a hand and shook a baby during a fundraiser in his home state of Mississippi today. The technical glitch was quickly discovered to be caused by an aide plugging the new TouchMeFeelMe internet tactile simulator backwards, but the parent of the jostled child was even less pleased than the baby according to witnesses. More...
My
Limekiller
Craig Charles (Dave Lister on Red Dwarf for those not in the know) at a sci-fi convention mentioned this technology or something similar to it. But he had issues with it. His bigest concern with having sex like this over the internet was thus.
What happens if you get a power surge? Rips your dick off and faxes it to Canada?
I know that would concern me
-- Wiccan Army, 13th Airborne Division "We will not fly silently into the night"
This makes the threat of a man-in-the-middle attack sound even more dangerous. Ewww.
fu-fme.com
:)
Hands Across America could be succesful this time - with only two people. ;).
This could have interesting ramifications (no pun intended
Seriously, people are already more physically separated than ever; rather than bring people closer, lots of technology has only widened the gulf.
I don't think I'm breaking any new ground here, many /.ers have been in a place in their lives where they've not had close relationships (platonic or otherwise). Even holding someone's hand has a positive effect on people's mental-well being.
Could this be more isolating than positive?
Hmmm. I wonder if W will use it to give Saddam the finger? Perhaps if leaders can flip each other off, using camel parts even, then it will diminish the desire to nuke each other. Then again it might have the opposite reaction. It would be easier to offend somebody with various body guestures than before.
I can envision a military guard next to the red button. Suddenly a finger pops out of his/her screen and presses it. "It wasn't me who pressed it, General, I swear to God!"
Table-ized A.I.
Not to mention "remote hole."
Ok, now it's getting yucky. I'll quit.
"If you think education is expensive, try ignorance" - Derek Bok
In the words of Dennis Miller:
"when the day comes that a unmployed steel worker can strap himself into his Barco-Lounger and fuck Claudia Shiffer for 19.95 an hour, it's going to make crack look like sanka"
Americans could not be more self absorbed if they were made of equal parts water and paper towel. -Dennis Miller
Ann: "Hey, this new remote hand technology is great for our tech-support desks."
Bob: "Do you mean like showing callers how to reboot and find the Esc key?"
Ann: "No, for slapping sense into clueless idiots."
Table-ized A.I.
Extension of Finger.
...and with this script you can pick your friend's nose too." :-}
So will we have to change the ol' phrase:
"You can pick your friends,
and you can pick your nose...
--- I wish I could hear the soundtrack to my life. That way I'd know when to duck.
Can you guys get this installed to help with my fantasy Emma Peel choice? I'm really having a hard time deciding.
If you post it, they will read.
When I went to college, there was a girl named Teresa Watt who had an account on the RS/6000. My buddy Rob had tears in his eyes when he showed me that you can actually "finger twatt".
Thank you AC... where ever you are.