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Santa Claus vs. the Marketers
Jonathan Cohen writes "Hi: Not sure if this is up your alley, but since Slashdot deals with privacy, copyright, and 'piracy' issues, I thought you might be interested...I'll quote my press release: It's Christmas Eve, and Santa Claus is grounded. After Claus Inc. hired a consulting firm in early November to re-brand Santa's image and revamp its business practices, the corporation has been on a downward spiral. The elf workforce has been downsized 70%, Santa's been given shoulder pads to make him look thinner, and even Rudolph's been eliminated for environmental reasons (nose radiation).
This is just part of the free short story "Santa Claus vs. the Marketers," an adult fable about contemporary business issues."
This is only half-true. Before the campaign Santa was depicted in several ways, green was popular but so was red and white. Coke picked up on the red and white one for obvious reasons but they didn't originate it.
TWW
"Encyclopedia" is to "Wikipedia" what "Library" is to "Some people at a bus stop"
In this time of shopping malls, gift giving and presents, lets all take a few moments to remember the reason for the season; the birth of Santa.
Phredd - "I have found people tend to take you far less seriously once you start waving your genitals at them..."
In another news Finland has demanded royalties, which may run into billions, because Santa comes from Finland.
They're not awake yet. I'm drinking my coffee, and reading /.
Besides, we opened our gifts last night :)
In a long time, I'm working Christmas day. I have what some would call the misfortune (although I like my job) of working Tech Support for Wireless Networking at the largest PC manufacturer.
Yesterday and I'm sure today, I'm being overwhelmed with calls from boys/girls, moms/dads and grads who are setting up their new wireless networks for the first time.
Don't forget the series of College students home for the holidays trying to get their portable with the wireless card setup for school to associate with mom and dads wireless network at home.
I have to admit, that when I first walked in this morning, I was a bit bitter. I considered blaming my day here at work away from my family on every caller. Were it not for them, I wouldn't have to be here.
But you know what? If I just got a wireless network for Christmas to go with my new computer, well, I would want the stupid thing to work too.
So I'm happy to help. Maybe someone's day can be made better by the fact that I can get there new toys all working for them.
To those people calling for older issues though...put down your computer. Watch some TV, relax with your family. Heck, go see a movie.
My daughter asked my why I had to work today...I explained that Santa had a wireless network in his sleigh so he could get mapquest...I had to be at work in case he needed help with it.
Merry Christmas!
In watching the Christmas-related stuff on the History Channel, it would seem that it was those pesky heathens who started all this revelry in late December. The church tacked on the Feast of the Nativity later and then Christmas on top of that.
:)
My point is that being a heathen, you should know quite a bit about the true meaning of Christmas!
The revolution will be televised. Blackout restrictions apply.
(I'll probably get modded into oblivion for this, but what the heck...)
While we're on the subject of subverting holidays: How about the fact that "Christmas" is the result the early Christian Church rebranding Yule (a.k.a Sunreturn)? They even changed the birthdate of Jesus (which was actually in March so far as anyone can tell for sure). Pine trees -- also co-opted from the Pagans. Santa Claus/Father Christmas -- ditto. Midwinter feasting -- etc., etc. All co-opted by (what was then) the New Order.
My take on the whole business from a Pagan perspective is that the Christians stole our holiday, now they're having it stolen from them in turn by the acolytes of Mammon. As you give, so shall you get. So don't preach at me about "the reason for the season" -- my reasons to celebrate are liable to predate yours by a millenium or more.
That being said, I hope everybody had a nice holiday, whatever you might call it. Here in Brisbane, we tossed a couple of chickens on the barbie, pigged out, and were blessed by some rain late in the afternoon that checked the heat nicely, thanks.
Il n'y a pas de Planet B.
Haha, it's still early in the morning for me but I can't resist being half troll/half serious:
In Soviet Russia Santa is Blue!
My wife's grandfather is Russian, so we've gone to visit him around the holidays a few times. Their "Santa" dresses much like ours, except that all of his clothes are dark royal blue. He is called Dedushka Moroz which means "Father Christmas." However, in most areas of Russia, it is traditionally Babushka Moroz (Grandmother Christmas) who leaves the presents for the children.
His first book, Politically Correct Fairy Tales was pretty cute, but by the time Holiday Stories came out the jokes had run their course. What with the climate of paranoia today, I've got a kick out of some of the political satire running locally.
He knows when you are sleeping...
He knows when you're awake...
He knows if you've been bad or good...
No, not Santa Claus, John Poindexter, so you better watch out!
A feeling of having made the same mistake before: Deja Foobar
Just in case the main site gets slashdotted .... the story can be gotten here as well:
D F
http://www.gutenpress.org/SantaClausVsMarketers.P
RFC2119
I realize that some employers discourage posting on websites and surfing the web while at work. My employer has a very clear policy on this as well.
/. and keep up with technology news and trends in the industry, more power to me.
Don't ignore the needs of customers to surf the web. Don't surf porn, hacking, hate, piracy or illegal activity websites.
Otherwise, surf to your hearts content to the limit of the firewalls. Which means, if between calls or while a customer is rebooting I want to read
Just because some employers are oppressive about the use of the web in their workplaces, doesn't mean my employer is.
Didn't I see this movie? It starred Pia Zadora as a kid...
whisper whisper
Oh. That was Santa Claus conquers the MARTIANS.
<EMILY-LATELLA>
That's very different. Never mind.
</EMILY-LATELLA>
General Relativity: Space-time tells matter where to go; Matter tells space-time what shape to be.
Forget Jesus, Santa, Mithra, and other mythology. December 25th is Sir Issac Newton's Birthday,and he definitely did exist! What would science be without him?
The Uncoveror: It's the real news.
In Japan, He's called Annual Gift Man, and he lives on the moon. -Lisa Simpson
The Uncoveror: It's the real news.
Biblical scholars and archaeologists have positively established the date of Jesus' birth. It was February 29!!! I guess Christmas will have to be once every four years from now on.
How ya like dat?
> No doubt the 'Pagans' ... did not have their religion influenced by people living around them, or the people who had come before them.
My point was that each religious New Wave *cough* borrows *cough* from those preceding it.
> You never learned anything about the peoples that predated the Celts?
Who said anything about the Celts?
> Your post reminds me of someone who constantly tells other people how profound 'The Matrix' is -- 3 years after they saw it.
I must admit that I enjoyed The Matrix, but -- "profound"? I don't think so. It was just a movie, after all.
I must confess that I find it amusing when I (very occasionally) point out someone else's preachy revisionism and get accused of it myself for daring to do so. Particularly by those who presume to pigeonhole me so they can make More Enlightened Than Thou attacks on some stereotype, whether or not it actually has anything to do with me or my belief system.
The pot thinks it sees a kettle and wants to call it black.
Il n'y a pas de Planet B.
That title reminds me of the old movie "Santa Claus Conquers the Martians", which, surprisingly enough, is aparantly being remade!
This is the movie from whence the line "Droppo, you're the laziest man on mars!" sprang forth into the world. It's a very entertainingly bad movie, and was featured in Mystery science theater 3000 episode 321.
Ryan Fenton
The elf workforce has been downsized 70%
I was under the impression that the Eldar left for the undying lands long before. Or did they leave because they were downsized?
"Backups are for wimps. Real men upload their data to an FTP site and have everyone else mirror it." -- Linus Torvalds
'my reasons to celebrate are liable to predate yours by a milenium or more'
That's like saying 'Mine is bigger!'
Really, who cares who's relegion is older? Older doesn't always mean 'right'.
The Santa by-way-of-Coke is an Urban Legend.
Claim: The modern image of Santa Claus -- a jolly figure in a red-and-white suit -- was created by Coca-Cola.
Status: False
(Excerpt)"This legend is not true. Although some versions of the Santa Claus figure still had him attired in various colors of outfits past the beginning of the 20th century, the jolly, ruddy, sack-carrying Santa with a red suit and flowing white whiskers had become the standard image of Santa Claus by the 1920s, several years before Sundlom drew his first Santa illustration for Coca-Cola"
...Also, I didn't know Buggalo could fly.
Thank You. S. Clause
"She's a scientist and a lesbian. She's not going to let it slide." Orphan Black
(1) Post a notice on the side of the box: "Our employees enjoy Christmas too. We will be available for tech support on Dec. 26th, bright and early."
(2) Be available for tech support for setup *before* Christmas, for those who have the foresight to test it. Make one optional box a decorated box that only needs a ribbon added. Necessary info is on the bottom.
(3) Make something that really works out of the box.
(4) Sell only working units.
(5) Be more diverse: hire more Jews, Islamic, and Buddhist people. They'll be happy to work on Christmas day. But also have Christians who can work on the Jewish, Islamic (etc.) holy days.
That's just a few. The overall message? Have a backbone. Be decent to your employees AND their families. Your employment practices do not exist in a vacuum; they help create the world you live in next year.
Correct Horse Battery Staple: 72 bits of entropy. Enter "Correct H" into google. When it generates the phrase, that's
*Happy**Holidays*!
Sigs are bad for your health.
www.santaclaus.com
/. accepts this pseudo-infomercial story but rejects my awesome submission of a case mod with a built-in coffee maker. C'est la vie.
Linux at home