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US Military Uses Spam, Internet Explorer
chundo writes "CNN reports that the United States government has been secretly encouraging the defection of senior Iraqi officials via email. Iraq is responding by shutting down some of their internet gateways to prevent these emails from getting through, forcing the US to find alternate means to deliver the message. Maybe they should have enlisted this guy - emails from him keep showing up in my inbox no matter what I do." This story about the growing military network bandwidth crunch shows the U.S. military trying hard to get every soldier online, all the time.
RE: Pictures of Alah! Download now!
RE: Make money selling burkas from your home.
RE: Gain weight now!
So with all the spam, now the Iraqui leaders get a chance to help all those Nigerians get money out of the country. I bet they also have 12 inch penises, have overcome hairloss, and have lost 10 pounds just this past week. What are we trying to do...create a race of wealthy, well hung, rich guys to fight against?
Mr. IRAQI PERSON,
You MAY be SURPRISED to receive this, but THE OFFICE GIRL said that you were a most TRUSTWORTHY PERSON. I beg you Forgive me for contacting you without prior contacting your office, but I am looking for a WORTHY business PARTNER to donate the sum of USD 124.5 million dollars. I am the son of the FORMER president of the U.S.A GEORGE BUSH who initiated a MILITARY CAMPAIGN in 1991. During this campaign, we discovered HUNDREDS of MILLIONS of DOLLARS stolen from THE REBELS. OUR economy is IN TROUBLE and we MUST get this MONEY overseas before the people DISCOVER it. We will gladly be willing to pay you the SUM of 26 MILLION DOLLARS for ASSISTING US. I pray to GOD that you will HELP US get this MONEY out of the country. ALL we need FROM you is your PASSPORT and SIGNATURE which you can fax to me or my colleauges to initiate the transfer of the MILLIONS of dollars. I remain your most humble SERVANT, and PRAY that you will be OUR SAVIOR.
SINCERELY,
MR. PRESIDENT GEORGE W. BUSH
There is no sig, there is only Zuul.
Iraq has no diplomatic relations with Nigeria.
To: centralcommand@us.mil
From: WhiskeyBravo49@iraq.us.mil
Subject: Request Instructions
Priority: High^H^H^H^HCritic^H^H^H^H^HANSWER ME NOW DAMNIT!
We're being shot at. Please advise. Thanks.
Lt. James Parker, USAF
555-555-5555 x555 (M-F 8a-5pm)
Of course, Central Command probably just has an autoreply set up.
Thank you for contacting Central Command. We are experiencing a higher than normal email volume due to the war in Iraq. Please be patient while we get to your email in the order that it was received. Your comments and questions are important to use, and thank you for risking your life for the USA.
Am I the only one who finds it vaguely disturbing to suddenly consider that there is a large number of people who are both sysadmins and Marines?
BOFH, indeed.