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Your Valentine's Day Plans for 2003?
Nos. writes "Valentine's Day is rapidly approaching, and though some of you Slashdot readers will be spending the day alone, there must be some of you out there who won't. So, what are you doing for that someone special this Feb 14th? My fiance is not a geek, and so wouldn't appreciate a 'geeky Valentine's'. Instead, I'm thinking a nice quiet dinner in one of our favourite restaurants. However, I recently got the 'You don't do anything romantic anymore' speech, and quite honestly am out of ideas. Can slashdot help? Obviously slashdot isn't the best place to ask, but I'm sure others are in a similar situation."
Why don't you cook the meal yourself?
Obviously, cooking a decent dinner takes a lot more time and effort, but isn't that an important part of romance? There are plenty of recipes available over the Internet, and you still have plenty of time to get the ingredients, so you have no excuse! If you live with your SO, get the afternoon off and start preparing and cooking then, so it's ready for just after she gets in.
Myself, I shall be spending SVD with friends, as my girlfriend will be on the other side of the world. Bit of a drag really.
Slashdot is really going down the tubes. Sorry, using the word "geek" in your paragraph isn't sufficient to make this "news for nerds" and it certainly isn't "stuff that matters".
When I look back over the list of articles I've had rejected by the editors, this kind of pisses me off...
Slashdot quality declines as the number of hot grits posts decreases. - Provolt's Law, Apr-09-2005
Look, you're a geek. You're meant to have an almost pathological interest in learning new things. Learn how to do all that stuff yourself. Decent massage oils are not cheap, but you can get reasonably-priced ones. You're not going to need gallons of them. You can get books out of the library on how to do it, and of course practicing is the fun bit.
You're going to need:
Once your girlfriend is there, feed her some good food (pasta is simple, and hard to get wrong), and have a glass or two of wine. Get some music on, and work down to slower, more relaxing tunes. How you transition from eating to massaging is down to you. Standing up and saying "Right, strip off!" is probably not a good idea.
The important thing is that you both have fun. Don't be afraid to keep the book out, but try and keep oil off it if it's a library book. If you're not getting it, have your girlfriend massage you, to show you what she wants. Most importantly, keep at it - you *do* have all day, at least, if you want to keep your girlfriend. Oh, and I can't stress this enough - turn your phones, pagers, etc off. Not onto silent, not vibrate (you kinky freak), OFF.
Tunes are important. Obviously, individual tastes are different, but there are some things that work well and some that won't. Here are some examples I've tried.
Good:
Stuff that doesn't work so well:
OK, hope this helps someone. Have fun!
I think that this discussion is on how to get TO that point. If you can't be romantic you'll never give her an orgasm, sorry.
For this day, at least.
I try to make my girlfriend feel nice whenever I can see her. It doesn't take much; a glance, a nice thing to say about something she bought, make her laugh...
These are things she lives all year long and make our relationship strong. If you have a fiance and you are waiting for one day to make up for the rest of the year, you are doing it all wrong.
Think of you relationship with your significant other as one of your projects; if you don't assign time and thought to it, it will fail.
Hey, that's a great post and rather good advice.
But that it exactly the opposite of what my girl would like. Funny, that.
We are -- going out to a restaraunt on E5th that a buddy of mine runs. Very nice place, top rated wine list, and surprisingly cheap. We're into cheap and punk rock.
Then headed off to see Ted Leo in Brooklyn. Ted's a good guy and his band absolutely rocks.
After that, back to the E. Village to Manitobas, 7B, or Ace, to -- guess what? Shoot some pool, look at people, drink some beers, hang with friends.
Then back home to put on some Mission Of Burma, the Rapture, the Clash, something like that.
Um, I'll leave out the rest. You get the idea.
So here's the answer -- know your girl. They don't all want the same thing. Mine's got a masters degree and an ivy league education and blows me away, but she'd rather rock on Valentines Day than get a massage. Course, she'd rather do this every night. Wow. I guess I really like her.
Happy Valentines Day, baby. (Granted, one thing she'll never do is read slashdot...)
Do some fairly normal things like you usually would, if you have kids, make sure they're at a babysitters, give her the present of a vibrator, use said present on her in a very sensual way, go down down down and stay there for a while, and make her actually beg you to put her out of her misery with your "big unit" or whatever.
When you actually do give it to her, make sure you last at LEAST 15 minutes. And no athletic shit either. Slow and gentle. Act loving!
No matter if you took her to Arby's previously, that will have been a special Valentine's day.
"I recently got the 'You don't do anything romantic anymore' speech, and quite honestly am out of ideas."
Funny how this "holiday" falls (more often than not) on the guy. What about the woman being the romantic one and coming up with that "something special".
Eh, fuckit, I'm just bitter. Just out of a slightly-longer-than-a-year relationship and sick this 'You don't do anything romantic anymore' shit. Bleh.
Co-founder and designer at Music Nearby: http://musicnearby.com
Oh, and maybe it's too obvious to need pointing out, but romance doesn't have to be confined to one day a year. What happens the rest of the year makes more of an impact.
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Or, if you just can't stand the saccharine schmaltzfest that is Valentine's Day, stay home and listen to your Smiths records. Add some Leonard Cohen and some Joy Division to the mix as needed. Face it: Valentine's Day is a crock of shite.
So here's the answer -- know your girl.
Therein lies great wisdom. Yep. I wrote my girlfriend a shell script, rather than a poem. A shell script (which I've already given her) that reads the EXIF headers from her photos, thumbnails them, and keys over some info from the EXIF and a copyright message. Hey, she appreciated it more than gooey poetry.
Personally, going to a french restaurant we really like, then have reserved a 1 hr private dance lesson for us for ballroom dancing :)
Figured it was kind of original, plus we'll have fun, it won't be "one of those default v-day gifts", and maybe we'll (me specifically) will learn enough to dance more often at formal events
Oh, for fuck's sake, you won't have a heart attack just because you eat beef cooked in fat now and again. Eat properly, and exercise. Very simple.
Okay here's where you've got it all wrong. And coming from a girl's point of view, I'd advise you listen. It's not so much the diamond that the girl wants, it's the DeBeers commercial! Think about it... two wonderfully in love people hanging about in shadows exquisitely dressed. That's what the girl wants... and since on the whole guys aren't more unique and tend to let commercials dictate what they do... diamonds epitomize the moment. So it's not really the fault of the diamond. If it's the bloodshed you're worried about, do some research. It's diamonds from the war-torn Congo that are funding the fighting. But you can get diamonds from other parts of the world. Some jewellers use these "peace" diamonds exclusively...but then... they are more expensive... Personally I don't want my guy to spend a fortune on me, I just want him to spend a lot of time on it. =) oh and as a side note, it DOES have a history: Wearing a diamond ring on the fourth finger of the left hand dates back to ancient Egypt, where it was believed that the vena amorous (the vein of love) ran from that finger directly to the heart.