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SEC Lifts Ax For Minnesota Stock-Price Spammer

Posted by timothy on from the suhwing-batta-batta-batta dept.

thejuggler writes "A call to Samuel Meltzer's St. Paul home is greeted with the message that he doesn't want to be bothered by solicitations. But, this story in a Minneapolis newspaper tells how the Feds and SEC claim he is a huge spammer. They claim he sends out spam spreading false and misleading information about various penny stocks. So far he has made at least $159,600 in stock and cash from 1998-2001 for spreading this false information. In a brief interview Tuesday, Meltzer (The evil spammer), 37, said he hadn't seen the complaint. "This is a surprise," he added."

6 of 209 comments (clear)

  1. Heh. by Black+Parrot · · Score: 5, Funny


    So a spammer doesn't want to be bothered by solicitations. You won't need to take your iron supplements today, folks! There's irony a-plenty here.

    --
    Sheesh, evil *and* a jerk. -- Jade
  2. Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition by ConeFish · · Score: 5, Funny

    We could rid ourselves of all these spammers if we just brought back the Spanish Inquisition.... although it seems as if the feds and SEC might already be getting their help....

    --
    The dumber people think you are, the more surprised they are when you kill them.
    1. Re:Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition by Talonius · · Score: 5, Funny

      Don't you mean..

      ..the Spammish Inquisition?

      Bork! Bork! Bork!

      --
      My reality check bounced.
  3. If he thinks that's a surprise by Brandeissansoo · · Score: 5, Funny

    Just wait until he tries to take a shower in prison.

    1. Re:If he thinks that's a surprise by Snard · · Score: 5, Funny

      News flash - Minnesota prisoner hospitalized after receiving enema of 20 cans of Hormel meat products. Film at 11.

      --
      - Mike
  4. Now now, we should do this scientifically by cgenman · · Score: 5, Funny

    Sir Bedevere: Tell me. What do you do with spammers?
    Peasant 1: quarter them!
    Sir Bedevere: And what do you quarter, apart from spammers?
    Peasant 1: More spammers!
    Peasant 2: Videogames!
    Sir Bedevere: Correct. Now, why do spammers quarter?
    Peasant 3: ...because they're... Videogames?
    Sir Bedevere: Good. So how do you tell whether he is a Videogame?
    Peasant 1: Dominate Japan with him!
    Sir Bedevere: But don't we also dominate Japan with excessively cute rodentia iconography?
    Peasant 1: Oh yeah.
    Sir Bedevere: Now, do videogames withstand a slashdotting?
    Peasant 1: No, no... Throw him to the Trolls!
    Sir Bedevere: No, no. What else does not withstand a slashdotting?
    Peasant 1: Apples!
    Peasant 2: IIS!
    Peasant 3: Very small rocks!
    Peasant 2: Debian! KDE Mirrors for minor upgrades!
    Peasant 1: Mindstorms Segway Scooters!
    Peasant 2: Beers cooled by Jet Engine exhaust!
    Peasant 3: Matrix Movies!
    Peasant 2: The RIAA!
    Peasant 3: Churches! Churches!

    King Taco: Atari 800s!

    All Peasants: Ooooooooo....
    Sir Bedevere: Exactly! So logically...
    Peasant 1: If... he... computes as fast as... an Atari 800... he's a videogame.
    Sir Bedevere: And therefore?
    Peasant 1: ... A spammer!
    Peasant 2: A Spammer!
    crowd: A Spammer! A Spammer!

    Bedevere: Who are you who are so wise in the ways of mob logic?
    King Taco: I am CmdrTaco, King of the Geekins.
    Bedevere: My liege!

    --
    The ______ Agenda