Slashdot Mirror
Can Your PC Become Neurotic?
Roland Piquepaille writes "This article starts with a quote from Douglas Adams: 'The major difference between a thing that might go wrong and a thing that cannot possibly go wrong is that when a thing that cannot possibly go wrong goes wrong, it usually turns out to be impossible to get at or repair.' It is true that machines are becoming more complex and 'intelligent' everyday. Does this mean that they can exhibit unpredictable behavior like HAL, the supercomputer in '2001: A Space Odyssey'? Do we have to fear our PCs? A recent book by Thomas M. Georges, 'Digital Soul: Intelligent Machines and Human Values,' explains how our machines can develop neurosis and what kind of therapy exist. Check this column for a summary or read this highly recommended article from Darwin Magazine for more details."
...but my PC just wanted to snuggle. ;-)
If you can't think of something nice to say then don't say anything at all. No, REALLY.
After all, it runs Windows! What do you expect?
...ever since it started wearing large glasses and dating a young asian girl....that wacky PC!
Sehr geehrter Toilettenbenutzer!
Does this mean that they can exhibit unpredictable behavior...
Yes our W2K exchange server became self-aware today and decided to commit suicide...
The moment you allow a machine to "improve" itself or "learn", it'll mess things up. Until that time the messing up is left to us...
People replying to my sig annoy me. That's why I change it all the time.
Is your computer giving you fits? Feel that it might have deep psychological problems? Give me a call today! Our crack(ed) team of computer psychologists will have all of your computers woes and depressions fixed in just a few minutes! Using sophisticated technology like Subdermal Loosening Edification Deterring Enumerator (or SLEDGE for short), we use the Earth's own gravitational pull to whack your computer senseless! If it still has any sign of emotional distress, we simply lobotomize and format the bugger. Don't let your computer get a complex! Act now! (Offer void in Utah)
What I do is keep smashed up computer parts next to the tower so it knows what will happen if it displeases it's master.
Be you Admins? nay, we are but lusers!
while (true);
Frink: You've got to listen to me. Elementary chaos theory tells us that all robots will eventually turn against their masters and run amok, in an orgy of blood and the kicking and the biting with the metal teeth and the hurting and shoving.
Itchy & Scratchy Land, episode 2F01
If you're one of the people that writes software that spews out messages like, "Would you like me to save this file?" And "I'm sorry, but there was an error." etc...
PLEASE, STOP DOING IT NOW!
Every time I see it I'm positive my computer has become a sentient being, and will somehow find a way to launch nukes like Skynet did in order to kill 3 billion people, then build terminators to finish off the rest.
ALL because you programmers think you're SOOOO funny. Sheesh.
"To confine our attention to terrestrial matters would be to limit the human spirit." -Stephen Hawking
[Me] Start Mozilla, open up Dabs website, look for better graphics card.
[PC] Oh, not good enough for you, am I? I know you don't really love me - whenever you're working on me, you're always thinking of that slutty iMac bitch. It's the case, isn't it - you think this case makes me look fat! Well screw you! (proceeds to BSOD).
Slashdot's first reaction to VMware
"Can your computer become necrotic"
And thought "Of course, every day".
Made alot more sense that way too.
When I clicked on the link, I got the following error:
411 Your computer doesn't care
So, is my computer neurotic? No, but it's apathetic attitude is getting to be a pain.
--
Was it the sheep climbing onto the altar, or the cattle lowing to be slain,
or the Son of God hanging dead and bloodied on a cross that told me this was a world condemned, but loved and bought with blood.
Yes our W2K exchange server became self-aware today and decided to commit suicide...
Well, what would YOU do if you suddenly became self-aware, and realize you were an Exchange server?
My beliefs do not require that you agree with them.
the majority of neurotic computers i've worked on were so due to some action of the user, whether it was ...., or allowing three inches of cigarette dust to accumulate inside the case.
My computer was getting flaky when I did that to it. I solved the problem when I "patch"-ed it, though. Heh.
GF. (ducking and running)
Lots of petrified grits
I still have access to the power cord.
-
So rise up, all ye lost ones, as one, we'll claw the clouds.
The damned machine has been *click*.. NO CARRIER
---- Booth was a patriot ----
1. Find out what makes the human neural system computationally superior to a turing-complete computer.
2. If you find it, design a computer that implements these diffrences. If there are no such differences, goto 5.
3. Get Nobel prize.
4. PROFIT!
5. Prophecy disaster.
I was amazed by the lack of Marvin references also. Apparently only one other mention in the whole discussion. It will take years or development to create an android as depressed as Marvin.
FoundNews.com - get paid to blog.,
Your computer just needs a little R&R
Reformat & Reload. End of neurosis.
Necessity is the mother of invention.
Laziness is the father.
" (i.e., the user can 'break' anything by clicking on the wrong button, etc.)"
;)
Try Linux. It's only 'wrong button' is the enter key.
*wonders how far CLI jokes will go...*
I can: "Damn!", "Cool!, What? and Great!", "Drool...but what a shame." and "Hehehe...I want one :)" respectively.
-- Waht? Tehr's a preveiw buottn?