Six Monkeys And An Old Saw

Sayten241 writes "They say that an infinite amount of monkeys typing at an infinite amount of typewriters will produce literature greater than Shakespeare. Well, it has been proven that six monkeys and one computer will produce a computer that has been smashed with a rock, urinated upon, and four pages worth of the letter 's.' The end of the article states that scientifically this does prove that monkeys are more complex than random generators."

Comments

sounds familiar

[bearl]

That sounds remarkably like a development team I worked with once.

(easy joke, but necessary)

monkeys and typewriters

[AdamTheBastard]

"it was the best of times, it was the blurst of time"

You stupid Monkey!

p.s. FP?

Re:monkeys and typewriters

[kent_eh]

Found years ago on somewhere on usenet

"We've all heard that a million monkeys banging on a million typewriters will
eventually reproduce the entire works of Shakespeare. Now, thanks to the
Internet, we know this is not true."

Robert Wilensky, University of California

Re:monkeys and typewriters

[lommer]

I think the researchers actually went about this the wrong way. A computer is not a typewriter: there are important differences that I think would make a typewriter work better than a computer (for the purposes of producing random text anyways):
a) If you hold down a key on a typewriter, it doesn't fill 6 pages with that one character.
b) I would imagine that the mechanical action of the typewriter is more appealing to primates than silent techno-wizardry (more sensory feedback as a response to manipulating the typewriter)
c) While it might be neccesary to simplify the typewriter (think carriage returns), it's easier than simplifying and bomb-proofing a computer
d) and the list goes on...

Re:monkeys and typewriters

[vadim_t]

True, but it still leaves you with the randomness problem. Here's my theory on why this is very unlikely:

Since monkeys aren't random almost certainly nothing that makes sense will be typed. They'll find some way of having fun with say, the carriage return or jamming the typewriter. And since the distribution of QWERTY doesn't really match the usage frequency of the letters the usual "random" typing people do wouldn't make good text. For example, I'll "randomly" type something: lgkljadthglbkads. Now look at it, and you'll see pretty much all of it is in the middle row. If you try better you'll almost certainly be pressing the keys under your hands, in a not completely random order, and moving the hands around the keyboard not very randomly either. Humans don't type randomly, monkeys probably wouldn't either.

What OS?

[Anonymous Coward]

Maybe they were just expressing their opinion?

Original BBC story, more links

[WIAKywbfatw]

This was research carried out by the University of Plymouth (that's Plymouth in the UK, not in the US) at the nearby Paignton Zoo.

And here's the original BBC News story.

I'm not sure I see any real value in their research, but I am concerned about their methodology - that's an awfully small data set (only six monkeys, and only over one month) from which to draw any concrete conclusions...

Six monkeys = rubbish. Twelve = end of the world

[WIAKywbfatw]

Didn't they learn anything from Terry Gilliam?

Monkey business

[magnesius666]

Who are we to judge poignant primates literature? They most certainly tried to write "Sleep dwell upon thy eyes, peace in thy breast.." but the "S" got stuck on the urine infested keyboard. I can only imagine their frustration.

But it has already been proved in the affirmative

[Pretzalzz]

I did this little experiment. A hundred million years ago I started with a couple of million monkeys, and I let them go to see what would happen. They got off to a slow start and didn't do much for a long time except have sex and eat and sleep. But then, after waiting long enough, one of these monkey's descendents had a kid named William Shakespeare and he sat down and produced the complete works of William Shakespeare. Thereby proving my theorem, an infinite number of monkeys, given an infinite amount a time, will produce the complete works of William Shakespeare. And I didn't even need an infinite amount of either monkeys or time.

You are All Wrong...

[efuseekay]

The stupid researchers gave us a lousy computer, waaaaaaay outdated to do anything. For example, one of my concubine wants to play the game Quake3, but that damned thing does not even have a GUI! Pffft..

So what are we suppose to do? We did what any human would do : we shit on it. Because, adding pieces of shit to a piece of shit is not going to make it look any less bad than it already is.

Btw, I posted this using lynx and a stupid 14.4 modem that my resident science chimp had managed to hook together (Thanks Baba!). We tried for First Post, but some idiot beat us to it.

Yours,
Able,

Alpha Male Monkey,
Plymouth.

And in a related story...

[General_Specific]

But after a month, the Sulawesi crested macaques had only succeeded in partially destroying the machine, using it as a lavatory, and mostly typing the letter "s". ... And the RIAA is now investigating to see if the monkeys have traded any copyrighted music files.

This is 1 instance where I wish I was a scriptkidd

[NoMoreNicksLeft]

With back orifice installed on the machine. Would have to have timed it right, when no one would notice, but something like this...

Day 1: That stupid zookeeper really pisses me off, giving us a machine running windows. Sure, we're a few million years slow in evolving, but goddammed, we're not *that* stupid. And on a Packerd Bell, no less.

Day 2: From our cage, I could just barely see the zookeeper molesting the goats in the petting zoo again. Sick.

Day 3: Was afraid that they might catch on to me, but seems they are illiterate. The animal feeder must have pissed on the keyboard again, and you know damn well we'll get blamed for that one. Oh well, I managed to pick his pocket and grab the Visa card. Won't his wife be shocked when she sees the 12,000UKP bill for www.hotmansex.co.uk.

Day 4: Managed to scrounge up some weapons grade plutonium, but this machine isn't fast enough to simulate the H compression in the elliptical chamber. May have to do the math in the dirt with a piece of twig. Next on list: Think of a way to frame some arabs for the detonation.

[Re:True but...] Far better than I

[LiberalApplication]

Far more intelligent than I.

The other day at work, I tried to defecate on my workstation, but I couldn't figure out how to undo my belt buckle. I wound up with an unpleasant package to tote home. My project manager was so displeased that she threw her feces at me, screamed, and beat at her chest before jumping into a tree and vanishing.

Then the president of our company came, shot us all with tranqulizer darts, and when I awoke, I found that had been neutered.

Oh the pitiful life of a software developer.

Re:Maybe not better then shakespeare, but.....

[Anonymous Coward]

HAHAHAHA LOLROTFLHAHA!1111 I MAKE JOKE SI TEH MICROSOFT! I SI TEH FUNNAY!11!

Lameness filter encountered. Post aborted!

Windows Paper Clip

[jonv]

Shame Microsoft clippy wasn't there to help them. "It looks like your writing the complete works of shakespeare"