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Klingon Interpreter Needed In Oregon
myrashka writes "CNN has a report of a position available for an Klingon-English interpreter by a mental health office in Oregon (how apropos). Could this be the start of the next hot job market (perhaps they'll need Nebari-English interpreters next)?"
And I suppose in the next World War, we'll be using Klingon-speakers in our radio communications so that the Germans won't understand.
Oh cruel fate, to be thusly boned! Ask not for whom the bone bones; it bones for thee. -Bender
As for Evlish, don't come crying to this guy when you need an interpreter...
so the percentage of psychos that are also star trek fans is relatively large on average? ..intersting..
But even the Trekkies didn't camp in front of movie theaters for weeks to see a movie- they can't be too out of it!
(\_/)
(O.o) This is Bunny. (> <)
I heard about some kid who wrote so much BASIC that he started speaking it.
:)
Does that mean the staff has to learn computer languages too?
Sad to say, but I've actually become able to THINK in binary and yes there really are only 10 types of people in this world, those who think in binary and those who do not...
Now, if I could only figure out ascii conversion on the fly I would probably be the first speaker of binary.. (jeez, now I'm probably gonna start working on that... I need a girlfreind or something..)
seeing as I can speak Mimbari (Anlashok training) and I even know some Narn.
Maybe one day there will be an opening for a programmer who's fluent in English.
"I think I will spend the next few years of my life learning how to speak fluent Modem."
Will that be phone, wireless, or broadband?
Nurse : Can I get you something?
Mental Patient 1: S'mo fo butter layin' to the bone. Jackin' me up. Tightly.
Nurse : I'm sorry I don't understand.
Mental Patient 2: Cutty say he cant hang.
Jive Translator : Oh nurse, I speak jive.
Nurse : Ohhhh, good.
Jive Translator : He said that he's in great pain and he wants to know if you can help him.
Nurse : Would you tell him to just relax and I'll be back as soon as I can with some medicine.
Jive Translator : Jus' hang loose blooood. She goonna catch up on the`rebound a de medcide.
Mental Patient 1 : What it is big mamma, my mamma didn't raise no dummy, I dug her rap.
Jive Translator : Cut me som' slac' jak! Chump don wan no help, chump don git no help. Jive ass dude don got no brains anyhow.
They're trying to round up the last two dozen or so Star Trek fans out there and submit them for "rehabilitation" ... probably every fan made Star Wars movie ever made, 24/7, for 2 weeks, and the funny one (the Imperial Stormtroopers Cops episode) isn't included.
"I think I will spend the next few years of my life learning how to speak fluent Modem."
Will that be phone, wireless, or broadband?
Why you little wise-ass, I oughtta BweeepPhsoooooOOOOOOOooo sHOOOOooooooo bweeeeeeeeeep be boooong pshoooooooooooo!
..but with my accent, I'll never be mistaken as a native. I wonder if that disqualifies me for the position?
I am NOT a man!
I am a free number!
Klingon? Oh, hell, I'd settle for someone who can speak "Girlfriend."
My
Limekiller
(perhaps they'll need Nebari-English interpreters next)?
Don't be silly. They would just inject the patient with translator microbes if they ever had that sort of situation.
$0...4Re +heY g01Ng +0 N33d @ L3Et 5p3aK 1n+erpre+Er nEXt?
Health Admin: "I'm sorry, we're squeezed for cash, so you'll only be able to see your psychiatrist once every three months... But rest assured, he'll have a Klingon interpreter standing by each and every time."
Patient: "[in Klingon]Phew..."
------
If you thought this was funny, visit Stinky Shorts just to see how mistaken you are.
High unemployment? Did you guys run out of trees to cut down? I thought logging was big business there, did the rest of the world stop using wood?
Eve Fairbanks says I drive a hybrid!LOL
Couldn't the nurses just translate this simple phrase in to klingon and memorize it:
"You're a dork. No more TV for you. Go outside."
Maybe the disgruntled civil servants can challenge the Klingon interpreter to ritual hand-to-hand combat... :-)
By the time they find and commit me I will speak only the language I'll have developed. [indulges in a mad laughter]
I've know people only capable of communicating in quotes from Monty Python and/or The Goon Show
BweeepPhsoooooOOOOOOOooo sHOOOOooooooo bweeeeeeeeeep be boooong pshoooooooooooo!
R2D2 is that you? Long time no see. Where have you been all this time?
- We are the slashdot. Resistance is futile. Prepare to be moderated -
Is anyone else worried that this is a ploy to drag all those who speak klingon out, so the psychiatrists can round up more patients?
seems a bit suspicious to me.
Oh that's just great. Now a degree in KLINGON has more practical application than my liberal arts degree...
"In a Democracy, people get the kind of government they deserve." -Winston Churchill
So what's up with enprofylline or terephthalic dihydrazide or 4,6-diamino-isophthalamid or 2,4-dicyano-3-methylglutaramid or 3,3-dimethyl-1-(3-nitrophenyl)triazene or of course the good old isocaffeine? All readily (i.e. commercially) available compounds with the same formula.
:-)...)
(I can't believe I just did a database search on this
How does one say "I need to get a life" in Klingon?
These people are mentally divergent, and need help understanding that Klingon's don't fucking exist.
I wonder if they've tried holding out a iPod and telling them that it's a universal translator. it might make them start speaking english.
If you mod me down the terrorists will have won
jeez, now I'm probably gonna start working on that... I need a girlfreind or something
Alas, I don't think you'll find a girlfriend that needs you.