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Worms Going Further, Faster

Posted by timothy on from the thanks-for-your-attention dept.

Major Byte writes "Rob Kolstad's MOTD (pdf) column in Usenix login; passes along a few distilled factiods from a CAIDA analysis of the 'Sappire/Slammer' Worm. When it was at full blast it was scanning over 3 billion systems per hour--a speed that 'a "better" vulnerability would have enabled infection of the entire internet in 15 minutes, a "flash worm" or a "Warhol Worm."' I think 'better' to mean 'able to infect across a lot of platforms.'"

27 of 301 comments (clear)

  1. Ah, the lovely internet... by Qweezle · · Score: 5, Funny

    I'm wonderfully happy to live in a world where the only large-scale communication network is prone to mass disruption and/or destruction at the drop of a pin. Great.

  2. Good for the worms by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    Fast moving worms are harder for those pesky birds to get at.

  3. damn. by wo1verin3 · · Score: 4, Funny

    I thought this article was about Worms 2 being released for linux :(

    1. Re:damn. by gregfortune · · Score: 3, Funny

      Oh come on, that's not a troll... Worms 2? I'd open my firewall up for that one :)

  4. I had worms once... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny

    It was terrible. I had to take lots of drugs.

  5. Re:Oh no! Shut the Interweb off! by rkz · · Score: 5, Funny

    Cut off their arms?

    --
    There is no god
  6. I've got worms! by eupheric · · Score: 5, Funny

    obligatory dumb and dumber:
    LLOYD
    (smiling)
    I got worms.

    MARY
    I beg your pardon?

    LLOYD
    That's what we're gonna call it: I
    Got Worms. We're gonna specialize in
    selling worm farms â" you know, like
    ant farms. A lot of people don't
    realize that worms make much better
    pets than ants. They're quiet,
    affectionate, they don't bite, and
    they're super with the kids.

    MARY
    Aren't ants quiet, too?

  7. No worms for me, please! by XxtraLarGe · · Score: 5, Funny

    Thank God I've got a Mac! It's hard enough to get regular software ported, I doubt that many people would invest time to port a worm, except "Worms Blast" =D

    --
    Taking guns away from the 99% gives the 1% 100% of the power.
    1. Re:No worms for me, please! by hondo77 · · Score: 4, Funny

      I use a Mac, too, but I have no illusion of immunity.

      I do. Woo hoo!

      --
      I live ze unknown. I love ze unknown. I am ze unknown.
  8. Some day by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Funny

    Some day, we will all curse like sailors and have to reboot every god damned machine we have - maybe even revert to latest backup. Some day, the apocalypse will hit us, and Internet will cough for a day like it had the SARS. And then you hope your mother wasn't in hearing range.

  9. Hm.... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    "Worms Going Further, Faster"

    Former East German sports coaches now working on worm farms?

  10. Comment removed by account_deleted · · Score: 4, Funny

    Comment removed based on user account deletion

  11. Re:Oh no! Shut the Interweb off! by blix5 · · Score: 5, Funny

    Harsher spankings for the people that still haven't grasped the concept of NOT clicking that email attachment with a .vbs extension. :P

  12. Re:Oh no! Shut the Interweb off! by calennert · · Score: 5, Funny

    -blink-blink-
    Connecting to AOL...
    -blink-
    You've got mail!
    -blink-blink
    "ooh, an attachment..."

  13. Re:speaking of large attacks by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny

    Stop listening to Art Bell, you'll rot your brain.

  14. Warhol by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    a speed that 'a "better" vulnerability would have enabled infection of the entire internet in 15 minutes, a "flash worm" or a "Warhol Worm."'
    A "Warhol" worm wouldn't infect the Internet in 15 minutes, it would infect it for only 15 minutes.

    1. Re:Warhol by retto · · Score: 3, Funny

      I think a virus with a 15 minute life would be a good idea. It could pop in, say 'gotcha,' a little 'how's your father,' and then retire with a little dignity. Too many viruses nowadays overstay their welcome and just wind up looking kind of pathetic. Every now and then I hear about Nimba or even Michelangelo trying to make a comeback with the Wizards and kind of ruins the memory of them from when they were in their prime. The good ones...they leave the game before the game leaves them...

  15. Re:Equation for a good worm by xactoguy · · Score: 2, Funny

    Hey! Thanks for the hints... heh heh heh... just kidding, maybe. ;)

    --


    And so we go, on with our lives
    We know the truth, but prefer lies
    Lies are simple, simple is bliss
  16. How to make super destructive worm by bigberk · · Score: 3, Funny

    A really nice way to make an extremely destructive worm would be to ensure that the great majority of computers connected to the internet are running the exact same operating software. This would guarantee that a vulnerability can reliably be exploited in pretty much any neighbor.

    Unfortunately, such a scenario is but a dream. Modern operating systems are too secure!

  17. But by commodoresloat · · Score: 5, Funny

    Everyone knows that worms DO infect apples.

  18. What about a hydra? by BitwizeGHC · · Score: 2, Funny

    A multi-headed worm that can penetrate seven different networks at once, and steal 4 billion dollars from the Swordfish slush fund, all within ten seconds?

    --
    N4st0r, trixx0r h0bb1tz0rz! Th3y st0l3 0ur pr3c10uzz!
  19. Re:Cross-platform not necessary? by dbretton · · Score: 3, Funny

    any idiot with a little spare time can write a reasonably effective worm.

    OK, I'll nibble. Write a reasonably effective worm!

    Otherwise, you're not even smart enough to be considered an idiot...

    I dare ya!

  20. only large-scale communication network? by Imperator · · Score: 4, Funny

    There are these things called, uh, let me think, they're often connected to wires in the wall, umm, sometimes people forget to turn them off in movie theaters, err, they make noise when someone wants to talk to you, uh, damnit I forget. But they were the big thing a few years ago. I think I can even remember using them for Internet access, but maybe that was just a bad dream.

    --

    Gates' Law: Every 18 months, the speed of software halves.
    1. Re:only large-scale communication network? by term8or · · Score: 2, Funny

      And what was that thing... Um, it's something like "Snail", or possibly "Male", um...

      --



      "As a writer / novelist you might want to spellcheck your sig. :) " - AC
  21. heh by Poofat · · Score: 2, Funny

    "The happiest day of my life was when the doctor said I didn't have worms anymore"

  22. Re:If it's so easy to write one... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny
    FlowCTRL writes:
    There was a lot of speculation in the security community that this is effectively what the "Slammer" worm was -- a non-malicous worm that forced everyone to patch their software. Remember that although this worm could have executed any code it wanted on all of those hosts, it had no malicious payload

    If that was their point, they were a bit too subtle for their own good.

    If I was going to do that, I'd stick a huge NOP slide into the payload followed by a JMP to skip over the text literal "INSERT MALICIOUS CODE HERE", just to make the point obvious :)

    Nonesuch@Chicago

  23. It was inevitable... by NotQuiteReal · · Score: 2, Funny
    The worms must have crossbred with the spam... after all, lots of them promise to make my worm go farther, faster, and LONGER!

    --
    This issue is a bit more complicated than you think.