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Getting Back Into Shape While At The Office?
rhuntley12 writes "Personally, I sit at a computer desk for 10 hours a day with very little actual work. I've also started to get a little belly and out of shape. I know it's real bad in my office, especially with all the beer I consume. What do you do to stay in shape? Any secrets? Recently I've started to do sit ups, push ups, and running up and down the stairs. I get a lot of odd looks, and would prefer something that doesn't make the whole office stare at me.
I've looked through some websites with equipment, but it's all serious equipment I can't/won't lug into work. Any suggestions?"
Eureka! I've got it.
We can switch lives. I bike everywhere, including to work, so exercise is omnipresent. How about I take your job drinking beer ten hours a day, and you get some exercise. To keep it fair we can split our pay evenly. You can even fuck my girlfriend sometimes (again, good exercise).
Now, does your workplace have taps, or is it all bottled beer? Domestic or imported? Is there a good bitter or porter there? I must know these things before we continue.
You're welcome.
Cretin - a powerful and flexible CD reencoder
Eat less, Shit more
I have? I haven't noticed. Do these pants make my ass look big?
I think it would benefit you not just physically, but also emotionally if you made your body available to the Open Source developer community. Their social integrity, hard work, and yoga expertise would enable to reach those goals you've had since Thanksgiving '96.
It is vital that developers allow the Open Source developer community to dictate their diet, physical exercise regiment, and holistics. Their experience will allow to gain a physique similar to Atlas, Ferrigno, or a trim body like Woody Allen.
Only when we realize the perverse writings of Suzanne Sommers are misguiding the children of our generation, can we free the stranglehold that Starbucks has on society.
Which is nice.
Wearing pants should always be optional.
(although clicking refresh to constantly reload slashdot feels workish.)
(2,3-Benzopyrrole)
An average human being can burn up to 100 calories for every ten minutes of masturbation. All you need is some tissue, a quiet room, and some good porn. It's fun, enjoyable and doesn't make you look like an ass running up and down the stairs. So, this is what I would suggest:
Put in about an hour of vigorous masturbation through the day. An hour can help you burn upto 600 calories. That itself would make up for a pitcher of beer. Start slow, and gradually increase the amount of effort you put in. Soon, you will be having fun several hours a day, compensating for several gallons of beer and having fun, while you're at it!
An Indian-American Hindu committed to non-violent thought/speech/action alarmed by the global explosion of radical Islam
"Burst Resistant ... balls are strongly recommended in all environments as staples or other sharp items may unexpectedly pierce your..." Oh, nevermind...
"Obviously, I'm not an IBM computer any more than I'm an ashtray" (Bob Dylan)
Yes, for that svelte, thin you, I recommend vodka and heroin.
1. Quit drinking beer in the office. If you really must be inebriated while you're coding, try whiskey instead.
2. People won't look at you funny if you work in the office and work out out of the office.
3. Tell me what slack-ass place you work at so I can get a job there.
Proud member of the Weirdo-American community.
I don't know about the rest of you but if I don't do something soon I'm going to go "Marlon Brando".
Appended to the end of comments you post. 120 chars.
Why not just slit your wrists and be done with it?
Seriously, you can't get around the laws of thermodynamics. If you're putting on the pounds, it's because there's more energy going in than going out.
That's why I invented the Chocolate Chip diet. Bought 4-5 bags of Chunky Chololate Chip cookies twice a week, me and my dog would just sit there and eat 1, 2, sometimes three bags at a sitting.
So, how does this make you lose weight? Remember how your parents would tell you not to eat junk because it would spoil your supper? It works. Eating healthy still leaves you craving for a junk-food fix. Eating junk fills you up. After several months of this, not only did I not want to see another chocolate chip cookie, but I had also lost about 20 pounds. At that point, it was a pleasure to start eating regular-type meals, and the weight has stayed off (been about 2 years now, and I've gotten rid of another 30 pounds w/o dieting).Problem now is that I don't seem to be able to put any weight back on (metabolism sped up as a consequence of being lighter).
And, yes, you can have beer.
The only exercise I get is walking my dogs. Mind you, I bring them to the office, so when I get jammed on code, I can take a hike :-)
Eat a big breakfast, a small lunch, and junk out at night to take care of the cravings and you should be okay.
Post your email address online, or in newsgroups. I get about 30 emails a day with different products offering to help me lose weight.
Oh, you have to stop using email filters as well.
"caffeine free"
YOU MONSTER!
Oh the humanity!
DJMD - The fourth man - Planetary
Hard liquor is much better for you. In fact, if you drink enough right after a meal, you can actually get negative calories from it...
the jar has went into deficite a loooong time ago.
oh wait. you don't mean only take pennies out when you have sex with your wife, do you?
shucks! (dumps back 500 dollars in pennies)
My life in the land of the rising sun.
When you get home, hit the showers and you'll be ready to go.
But how do you convince yourself to get up instead of hitting snooze again?
Seriously, though, it is worth it once you hit the road. Find what gets you out of bed that much earlier, and do it.