Slashdot Mirror
Meet Martin Taylor Of Microsoft's Open Source Test Lab
securitas writes "Martin Taylor was recently appointed as Microsoft's open source and Linux strategist and is responsible for Microsoft's open source and Linux test lab, mentioned on Slashdot last week. Taylor says his goal is to change Microsoft's competitive strategy by pursuing a fact-based approach instead of continuing the previous discredit-and-undermine strategy that was characterized by calling open source and Linux software 'a cancer, un-American and bankrupt' among other things. Taylor says he plans to focus on (and fund) studies that 'will highlight Microsoft's advantages in areas such as security, feature-completeness and total cost of ownership.'"
Martin Taylor is actually a revolutionary new AI developed by Microsoft. He'll be a part of Windows 2005 if everything goes smoothly. Think of him as Microsoft Bob's grandson.
I see into... the future... I see this "lab" only producing... whitepapers where Microsoft.... wins!
Whoa. There's a surprise.
Belief is the currency of delusion.
If Martin Taylor the guitarist knows he's got
an evil alter ego at MS?
siggy played guitar
Fact: XP runs faster than RH9.0
Untold: the XP was running on a 3GHz P4 w/ 512MB and the RH9.0 was on a 400MHz P2 with 256MB of RAM
Fact: MS OS'es have less bugs than Linux
Untold: Because one bug in SSH counts at least 15 times -- once per distro.
Fact: MS is more secure than Linux
Untold: The MS box tested was fully patched, running NO services, was connected to an ISA firewall...and to no other computer. They'll also forget to mention that the machine wasn't turned on.
Fact-based campaign. Will half-truths be considered facts?
Taylor says he plans to focus on (and fund) studies that 'will highlight Microsoft's advantages in areas such as security
Microsoft announced today that they are laying off a Mr. Marting Taylor, citing the fact that he had no work to do.
Taylor, head of Microsoft Linux Open Source Test Lab, said today 'fact-based studies focusing on areas such as security, feature-completeness and total cost of ownership.' conclusively prove:
Linux is 'a cancer, un-American and bankrupt', among other things.
Microsoft: Same cr*p, different way.
And I thought MY job sucked. ;)
- First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then ???, then profit.
CLIPPY: There is no escape. Don't make me destroy you. You do not yet
realize your importance. You have only begun to discover you power.
Join me and I will complete your training. With our combined strength,
we can end this destructive conflict and bring order to the galaxy.
Martin Taylor: I'll never join you!
CLIPPY: If you only knew the power of the dark side. Obi-Wan never told
you what happened to your father.
Martin Taylor: He told me enough! He told me you killed him.
CLIPPY: No. I am your father.
Martin Taylor: No. No. That's not true! That's impossible!
CLIPPY: Search your feelings. You know it to be true.
Martin Taylor: No! No! No!
Fact was a nice word, I'll miss it. But no matter, we still have the teeshirt:
Front side
picture: Iraqi minister of communications
caption: "there are no Americans in Iraq"
Back side
picture: his Billness
caption: "there are no bugs in Microsoft software"
He is also the person who discovered Amdahl's law
Wow, what are the chances of that?
*ducks*
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