How Much Does A Cloud Weigh?

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Posted by simoniker on Wednesday September 3, 2003 @05:58PM from the fluffy-but-heavy dept.

MyNameIsFred writes "ABC News is running an article revealing unexpected facts about weather formations. Ever wonder how much a cloud weighs? What about a hurricane? A meteorologist has done some estimates and the results might surprise you..." Reports that include the phrase "more than all the elephants on the planet" are always welcome.

13 of 505 comments (clear)

NEWS ALERT (Summary) by error502 · 2003-09-03 18:01 · Score: 5, Funny

Clouds are made of a lot of water. A lot of water is heavy. Clouds are heavy.

In other news, the sky is blue and grass is green.
1. Re:NEWS ALERT (Summary) by error502 · 2003-09-03 18:21 · Score: 5, Funny
  
  *Gasp!* The sky isn't actually blue! My world has been shaken! ...Grass is still green, right? ;-)
2. Re:NEWS ALERT (Summary) by Negative+Response · 2003-09-03 18:21 · Score: 5, Funny
  
  Um, I read the article, and doesn't it say clouds are made of elephants? Millions of them?
3. Re:NEWS ALERT (Summary) by glyph42 · 2003-09-04 00:42 · Score: 5, Funny
  
  Then my shirt is not red, and my pants are not beige, because when I turn off the light, they're all black, right? Or if I shine blue light on them, they look blue! Wait, but that blue light is black if I turn it off, so it cannot be blue! In fact, nothing is any color! There are no colors at all! Revelation! Ack! I can't see!
  
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  Music speeds up when you yawn, but does not change pitch.
I knew it by Kshu · 2003-09-03 18:02 · Score: 5, Funny

I always knew that elephants could fly...
Units Units Units by NASAKnight · 2003-09-03 18:05 · Score: 5, Funny

Doesn't anybody know that elephants are non-standard units? Give me something I can work with here, people. How many library of congresses would it take to equal the weight of a storm cloud?

Stephen

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Fault loves the past, worry loves the future, but content enjoys the present.
1. Re:Units Units Units by Anonymous Coward · 2003-09-03 18:33 · Score: 5, Funny
  
  Ideally a measurement like this should be expressed in 'Cats and Dogs' as opposed to elephants. :)
Elephants Smelephants... by Ironix · 2003-09-03 18:11 · Score: 5, Funny

Yes, and I have a car that weighs over 1 trillion fleas.

Did I mention my laptop that must weigh over 50 field mice...

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Still #1 -- Lonely Gay Geek
Re:Math? by error502 · 2003-09-03 18:12 · Score: 5, Funny

If that were actually RIAA math, one cloud would weigh about one elephants. You have to take into account how old they are. A really old elephant is equivalent to two middle-aged elephants. You also have to take into account if they know any circus tricks. The elephants that know circus tricks are equivalent to the weight of five regular elephants. Then there are the wild elephants, which are the equivalent of ten elephants that grew up in zoos.
How do you convert that to midgets? by tjstork · 2003-09-03 18:13 · Score: 5, Funny

The real question is how many midgets does an elephant weigh? If have 48 midgets per elephant, and I have 600 elephants per cloud, then....

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This is my sig.
Elephant Units by questamor · 2003-09-03 18:13 · Score: 5, Funny

Are they Metric or Imperial elephants?
1. Re:Elephant Units by Pompatus · 2003-09-03 18:24 · Score: 5, Funny
  
  Are they Metric or Imperial elephants?
  
  Definately Imperial elephants. Since we're talking about clouds, they have to be storm trooper elephants.
  
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  Squirrel ... It's not just for breakfast anymore
Re:I find your sense of superiority pathetic. by RALE007 · 2003-09-03 18:59 · Score: 5, Funny

I see no reason why most people should have some natural appreciation of what "550 tons" actually means.
I know how much 550 tons is, that's like
The weight of 9,500 ex girlfriends, or 550 ex girlfriends if you live in Utah.
The amount of shit expelled in the average SCO press release.
The weight of my formerly miniscule equipment after I replied to *every* penis enlarging piece of spam I've ever received.
Since they insist on reporting on the weights of things relative to others, instead of just sticking to a standard unit of measurment, I say the pick more interesting objects than VW Bugs or Elephants. For instance:
For extremely bad news, they could pick something friendly or cute to reference, such as "A comet with the mass of 7 billion cute fuzzy bunny rabbits is on a collision course with the Earth. I for one can't wait for the bunnies to get here!"
For scientific news trying to get your average Joe Blows attention for future (hopeful) government funding; "In other news, a space probe weighing as much as 170 pairs of Pamela Andersons breasts was launched at Mars today. The rocket carrying the probe created a massive 18,000lbs of thrust to get the probe headed on its way. Although there is a slight possibility of damage to the delicate probe, the 18,000 pounds of thrust must be used on the mass of Pamela Andersons tits to enable it to build up enough speed, faster and faster as it goes, to escape the Earths gravity. I'm sure every man involved is very proud at the success and has a special feeling at the moment."
Etc. Lame, but fun, try making your own.

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Beware blue cats moving at .99c