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Smart Sofa Recognizes Occupants by Weight
I am Kobayashi writes "According to CNN.com scientists at Trinity College in Dublin have created my dream couch. And yes, I admit to being a couch potato... Apparently the couch can be programmed with a personal greeting (it recognizes you by weight), and the scientists hope that it will one day be able to automatically tune to your favorite television programs, order you take out food, and control other household appliances."
"Cindy? Who is Cindy? No, honest honey, I have no idea who Cindy is. What's this couch talking about! ?"
It won't be able to recognize you by weight if it continues to do absolutely everything for you, like ordering food and changing the channel on the TV without requiring you to get up...
I wonder if they built an AI into it to intelligently determine who the occupant is by weight gain over time...
Do not look into laser with remaining eye.
Science: Pushing the boundaries of sloth, one invention at a time.
...will be released as the La-Z-Homer 3000.
And is it really a good idea to have furniture that can positively ID you?
I, for one, welcome our new sofa overlords.
So say I sit down with my backpack on may lap, it gets me wrong. Or if a kid/cat/dog jumps on my lap.
:)
Or kids jump on the couch and break it.
Or 2 kids sit next to each other in the space it takes to fit me, and the TV tunes it to my favorite porn station
or I lose a few pounds and it tunes me in to my wife's favorite shows...
This sounds pretty crappy to me
no comment
"order you take out food"
.net services) is absolute bullshit and a million times more effort than it's worth.
this kind of automatic buying stuff (like MS
So... it's an uncomfortable couch with a $10 digital scale built in?
...or a couch made of mouse pads.
And they got on CNN? Obviously the rest of us just aren't trying hard enough.
Real geeks don't want that couch, they want funny-looking ergonomic sofas or something with a built-in stereo and drink holder.
It's Slashdot's evil twin... SlashNOT
Before many of you run amok, and make fun of heavy people, please read the article.
It's in development, and has plans to be used to assist the elderly and those in hospitals.
This is not some way to keep people indoors, or track their TV habits, or any of the other conspiracy baloney that will sure to be brought up soon.
My mom says I'm cool.
OK, am I the only person that doesn't get it? First a side note, it isn't even a sofa, it is more like a old medical exam table, but I digress. Sofa's traditionally are for more than one occupant, so how would it deal with more than one person on it? Furthermore, ignoring the fact that it would be near impossible to get an accurate identity based only on the weight on a sofa, how is it really useful? My sofa knows I'm on it, what does it do for me? It can't really adjust any preferences for devices around me in a manner that is useful, I use my sofa for tons of diffrent uses, having guests over, reading, watching tv, surfing on my laptop, and all of those are would fail to benfit from my sofa knowing that I personally am on it. It just seems like the solution to a problem that doesn't exist.
Now the wife isn't the only one to tell you to lose weight.
Just imagine watching the superbowl, when you pick up a chip. Only to have your couch tell you "Put down the chip chubby."
i can see potential problems already.
say i'm sitting on the couch... some loose change falls out of my pocket.... i get up...
now the couch thinks my leperchaun is sitting there and plays the irish channel all day long. that would be so annoying.
Masturbating, of course.
from their prototype that required you to place a 12 ounce, specially modified bluetooth tranciever up your ass.
Great, just what I need.
So say I sit down with my backpack on may lap, it gets me wrong.
Clippy: So, you gain 20 pounds in just 2 days. Would you like to:
[ ] Enroll as sumo wrestler (you are qualified now)
[ ] Enroll in Taco Gym
[ ] Cowboyneal!
[ ] All of above
--
Error 500: Internal sig error
Even my furniture says it hardly recognizes me.
Having a sofa that says "Hello Bob" is all well and good. Right up until it starts saying "Hello Fat Cousin Rita" when you put on a few pounds over the holidays.
"Get up and take out the trash like you said you were going to THREE DAYS AGO YOU WORTHLESS BUM!!"
Or..
"If I find another porno in the DVD player you're not getting any for a month!"
Or..
"Honey, I'm sorry but I'm leaving you for Mandingo. I hope you and your couch have a happy life together YOU LAZY SONOFABITCH!!"
This could be bad. Very bad...
I don't want knowledge. I want certainty. - Law, David Bowie
Nor would it be effective to place one in each room and use it to track patients, as the article suggests, unless (1) your facility had cash to burn, and didn't feel like looking into more cost-effective solutions, and (2) you were planning to enforce the policy that none of the patients/residents were allowed to leave the sofa.
I suspect that this is more like one of those "Offbeat" stories they have at CNN every once in a while -- funny and cutesy in a "what will they think of next" kinda way, but not something you'll ever hear of again.
The bold print giveth, and the fine print taketh away
If I sat on it it would respond:
"hey, one person at a time please!"
yes - it will keep measuring how fast mr x keeps gaining weight. next it will also tell which doc to go to - maybe even call the doc (to write your death certificate). perfect recipie to make people more fat and stupid. wonder of mc daddy has something to do with it. 1st day; 150lb, day 10; 200lb - going good - day 30: your end is near, i'll order the your favourite quadruple cheese burger. makes me wonder who thought this up!
My experience is that every member of our family has his dedicated seat and always sits on the same couch even when he/her is alone.
Those lucky of you who live with your wife/girlfriend and have 'your own' couch, does your partner really use it when you are not there?
Maybe a simple 'ass present' sensor would be sufficient..
--
I'm a-huga bimbo
"Your honor, I did it because my husband hacked the sofa to say 'whoah, one at a time!' whenever I sat down on it."
"Judgement in favor of the defendent: Justifiable homicide."
"Derp de derp."
And this is a problem how, exactly? :)
The bold print giveth, and the fine print taketh away
Well, as unglamourous as a "butt print" is, it would be interesting to see if one can be identified by how one's pressure applies. Different parts push harder due to shape and posture, so if you happen to sit more on your left hip than on your right it should show...
Let's just hope that the software doesn't create a visual 3d model of someone's ass as a rendered image. *shudder*
Do not look into laser with remaining eye.
Sofa: "Get the hell off me, you fat bastard!"
Table-ized A.I.
..in from stage left walks the average Joe Husband.
Cut to frame of just door handle.. hand reaches in from left of frame and turns handle.
Door opens showing a delivery boy holding a pizza and asking, "Who ordered the large extra-cheese sausage?"
Cut to close up of husband's face looking puzzled.. then turns to look over shoulder with a stern look of annoyance.
Cut to full-frame shot of the three-section sofa.
"COUCH!!!" comes a voice from off screen (ala Hogan's Heroes).. Cue the canned laugher from 80s sitcoms.
Gee, maybe in just thirty or fourty years these scientists will figure out some way to interface their fantastic wonderful invention into an ordinary TV remote control! Even without the clue of using a biometric like weight to try to distinguish people, did anyone else get the feeling these sientists might not be the cream of the crop?
I'm an American. I love this country and the freedoms that we used to have.
...but I'm trying to figure out just what this feature would be good for.
It's cool that a room can know who I am (to set the preferred lighting level or whatnot), but why should a couch care? To show me what I want to watch on TV? That's a pretty complex algorithm that's taken me weeks to more-or-less teach to my TiVO...I don't want to have to teach it to my couch too. I despair of ever having furniture that can guess when I'll want to eat (let alone what), since even my GF hasn't proven too adept at that task.
What, other than "because it'd be cool to do", is the motivation for this project? (Not that being cool to do is a bad motivation...but it doesn't provide any reason for the rest of us to care.)
- Greetings, Anna.
Ok, that's it! Time to stop kissing Madonna and start kicking ASS!Would you like a new box of chocolate cream puffs delivered to you now?
Your reality show from last night is ready to view on the Tivo.
-- @rjamestaylor on Ello
Umm... yeah, I think someone has spent too much time watching the Simpsons.
Seriously, if we want music, lights, and the temperature to respond to who's in the room, aren't we better off with some voice recognition software? You and I have seen it on Star Trek - it looks like fun. =)
Basic voice recognition would be feasible for this purpose. "Room, this is Joe. You know how I like it." Plus, there won't be nearly as many issues as this uncomfortable sofa will have. How is a sofa with a weight sensor supposed to know what to do when people are holding bags, or have just been to a buffet, or has a friend on the couch with them, or is jumping on the couch, or all of the above?
Detects extended period of inactivity. Comes complete with 8 liters of embalming fluid.
It's only funny until someone gets hurt. Then, it's hilarious.
It would be even more embarassing if the three just sat down and the sofa greeted them "Hi Mike."
Oh, I wish I had my reaching broom!
--Homer
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"Outlook not so good." That magic 8-ball knows everything! I'll ask about Exchange Server next.
Where this would be useful is remembering settings for car seats (and mirrors). Cars already do this using different codes on keys, but this might be a better mechanism.
Still, as other people mentioned, it sounds like a solution in search of a problem.