Slashdot Mirror
How Were You Fired?
IanBevan asks: "A couple of years ago, the company I was working for was taken over by a larger competitor. I was told, right up until the last minute, that my development job was safe. Shortly thereafter, our illustrious team leader issued a new project plan, and I discovered that all my tasks were suddenly due to finish in about one week's time. Not being a great believer in coincidence, I asked my boss if there was 'anything he would like to tell me'. Of course, there was. Looking back this seems quite amusing now, but it could certainly have been better handled by the PHBs. I was just wondering, how have other Slashdot readers discovered that they have become 'surplus to requirements'?"
Not even a letter.
I was off sick at the time and instead of the payslip I was expecting I opened the envelope and it was my P45. It was a Saturday morning too so I had to wait until Monday before I could even speak to anyone about it.
(a P45 is the document you present to your next employer regarding the tax etc. you have paid)
There are places where the networks are not touching,and there are places where they are-Boeing's Lori Gunter
I worked for a local cable company while I was in college, as a traffic manager (collected and forwarded billing) and playback engineer. I was the only part-time employee -- everyone else was full-time. Our main purpose in life was to produce local-origination cable programming and serve as crew members when third parties rented TV studio space.
One random day, during the first day of a TV shoot for our primary third party client, several members of our "parent" cable station (a facility several towns away) showed up unannounced to work on the production. When asked why they were there (by the office PHB, who was as clueless as the rest of us) they said it was "to train as backups" when we were shortstaffed. Rumors started flying, and we "trained" them, which is a lot different than actual training.
The VERY NEXT DAY, the same people showed up for day two of the TV shoot, with the parent office's PHB in tow. The visiting PHB immediately called each person into our PHB's office one by one to fire them, as the "trainees" from the day before kicked us out of the studio and took over the third party production.
After everyone (including our PHB) had been fired except for myself and one full time employee, I was told I could keep my job if I was willing to commute several towns away for a one-hour "team meeting" every afternoon before driving back to my job in the regular facility -- an impossibility given my college schedule and the deteriorating condition of my car. I not-so-respectfully declined. The one remaining full-time person was told he was being kept on, at which point he quit (also not-so-repectfully). We all left the building en masse, and started helping each other look for jobs.
The end result: we all found placement elsewhere very quickly, the lucrative third party 2nd day shoot was a disaster, and the client never rented the space again -- in fact, they immediately shifted their business to a facility that one of the fired full-timers went to after the disaster. With the satellite office's primary source of revenue gone, the office was more or less shut down...which was probably the point in the first place.
Showed up to work and didn't get paid. CEO didn't come in that day and nobody could tell me when/if we would be getting our money. Turned out that no, we never did get our money. Fucker called us in a few weeks later and asked us to continue working for free. Meanwhile he got his daughter a modeling agent, cell phone, various invitations to hoity-toity parties... a real class act.
Read my old journal entries for how this nearly ruined my life, yay!
rooooar
I arrived at work on the day of the layoffs to find the doors locked; the only door unlocked was the main entrance, staffed by security guards, inside and out. When I entered, there were processing tables, you told them your name, they told you which room to report to. ...
..."
So, I was escorted to the room, where the corp counsel was waiting; he went through my severance package: essentially 2 weeks salary IF I agreed to sign of saying I wouldn't sue them; I didn't, because It appeared to me that they were violating WARN
The funny part: this guy then demanded my company ID, since it was company property. "Fine", I say, "after I retrieve my personal belongings from my desk." He says I can make an appointment to come get my stuff next week. I say "fine. You can likewise make an appointment to come by my house and get your ID next week." He says, you don't understand, we need your ID, it is ours. blah blah blah. End with "You don't understand: I am not turning it over until I get my stuff. You can't make me, and you can't threaten me; what are you going to do, fire me? It's a matter of principle, and there is no room for negotiation. Besides, I intend to get my stuff, today, regardless, so you can just make this easy on both of us and avoid an ugly situation if you just let me collect my belongings, which is what you SHOULD do anyway
I was escorted to my desk to get my stuff. Who knew that they wanted it back that bad? (I was the only one that left with a box; everyone else got a laugh out of that one...)
In the early 1980's, I worked for a software spin-off of an engineering company that was going down the tubes rapidly. One Friday I went to work to find:
1) A very polite policeman at the door.
2) No electricity.
3) No management people.
4) Confused employees.
5) An envelope at my desk with a check for 1/2 of my pay.
6) On the memo line, it read: "WYSIWYG"
7...
8) no profit.
My wife owned the company
http://Lenny.com
The problem is that in most companies, upper management makes decisions that affect the underlings, and unfortunatly, keeping the underlings in the dark is the only way to control them. Rarely do you see upper management being open with subordinates.
Besides, they can tell you anything they want. Unless you have some sort of terms in writing, you are at the mercy of their whims. Even then, it is typically so much in the company's favor that you are still out of luck.
My mom always said, "Jim, you're 1 in a million." Given the current population, there are 7000 of me. God help us all!
Long backstory deleted, but the new PHB hired a consultant to come in and help me rewire the network (about 3 dozen Netware 3.x terminals with a big wad of spagetti in the breakroom...). We were there 'til 11:pm or later getting the job done, and decided to go home and I'd do the documentation the next day. Next morning, I'm about to start typing it up, and I get The Call...
I pointed out that all of last night's work will be pointless if it's not documented so you might want to let me at least finish my current task, but they refused to let me touch a computer after that - they offered to let me write it on paper, though... I heard that months later they were still employing that same consultant (who made about 4 times what I, as an entry-level guy, was pulling down!).
A week later I found a job at 50% more pay - and this was 1995, well pre-boom. (not quite a happy ending as I've been underemployed for 2-3 years now, but...)
Perfectly Normal Industries
I haven't been fired (yet) you insensitive clod. Posting on Slashdot at work certainly isn't helping though.
I've never been fired. I'm more of a "quit in disgust" kind of guy. I did have an experience straight out of the movie Office Space (but preceding the movie by several years).
I had a job where I really didn't get along with my boss, and I really didn't like the way the organization was run. I'd said so multiple times, sometimes very loudly and publicly.
Then one day, the re-org hit the fan. We were told that we'd have to re-interview for our own jobs. I knew which way it was going to go, so I decided to have fun. I blew into the interview, and was brutally honest about everything. My interviewer was shell-shocked by the time I was done.
Short form: I was one of the only people in my group to keep my job. The carnage was bad: maybe 90% of my coworkers and even most of the managers were canned. It turned out that one of the people in charge of the re-org really liked me because I was the only one with enough of a spine to talk honestly about the problems in the organization. Everyone else just kissed ass and pretended that everything was okay.
Forward, retransmit, or republish anything I say here. Just don't misquote me.
So my Dad has to fire about 10-15 people - friends of his, etc.
End of the day, the PHB asks how it went, finds out everyone has been fired, and then FIRES my Dad, after making HIM fire everyone. What a cowardly prick the PHB was.
..........FULL STOP.
On a Tuesday morning, early in the month, after being at work a half hour or so, I got email calling all employees to a 10AM meeting in the only room big enough to hold us all (~300 probably).
The CEO seemed genuinely aggrieved at having to lay many of us (40%) off, reassured us that even then, at the peak of the dot-com bust, we would be getting 8 weeks of salary as severance, and our health coverage was paid through the end of the month. He asked us to return to our desks, where we would begin having one-on-one meetings with our immediate supervisors to learn the details of our layoffs, or new job responsibilities.
As I returned to my desk, I was considering all the projects I would need to wrap up and hand off if I were among those laid off, but when I got back, my computer no longer had access to the network.
I picked up my phone to call IS, but it, too, was disconnected.
It was by then obvious what was about to happen, and I had a pleasant enough conversation with my boss when my turn came. Turned out he had also been let go, and we discussed people we knew at other companies that might have use for me or him.
1) Early in the day, early in the week. Time to head home and immediately get started on the job hunt.
2) Early in the month, so I didn't have to worry about COBRA for a few weeks.
3) Real severance package.
I'm not sure what they could have done better, other than not laying us off in the first place.
Chris Owens
San Carlos, CA
This story showed up at a very appropriate time, as I was let go only a couple weeks ago.
I showed up to work slightly later than usual. Everything seemed normal until I tried to log in to one of my accounts, which wasn't working. This was immediately suspicious as everyone else's accounts were fine. Still, I went ahead and worked on my e-mail for a bit to see if things cleared up. About 10 minutes later my manager pops by my cube saying he needed to meet with me in his office. I asked him to let me just finish this one e-mail and I'd stop by. He looked obviously concerned. I finished the mail and noticed that my mail checks had started failing as well, meaning another account had been turned off. There was little doubt what was waiting on me in his office...
I got in there and he along with a person who just screamed "HR" by looking at her were waiting. As I sat down he pulled out a piece of paper and read a prepared statement. "Due to a restructuring of resources... blah, blah... you no longer have a position..." He then left the office as fast as he could to leave the HR person to explain my severance.
Once that was over they assigned me a shadow while I cleared out my desk and left. Apparently they also scheduled a meeting to distract the folks on my team while I was packing. (I suppose that's for the best... I doubt I would have liked to have one of them walk up and ask why I was packing.)
One thing I found humerous when I got home was a message on my machine... as I said before, I got in to work a bit late. Just before I got there my manager had called my house. "David, I have an urgent matter to discuss with you. Please call..." I'm almost surprised he didn't just say it on there, since the tone of his voice gave everything away...
It's amazing how quickly stuff like this can happen... you go in to work business as usual and suddenly you are out the door.
I worked for Barnesandnoble.com doing QA work. On sunday night at 9:30pm, I get a call from my rep at the temp agency (I had a perm position with BN.com). He tells me that BN is letting me go. I didn't have time to get a copy of the sunday paper to look at the classifieds because all the places were closed.
About 2 months later I get a job offer from IBM.com through a new agency, which I take. That week, I get a call from the rep from the previous agency askinng me to take a job with him at some company, and he would offer me more money than what IBM was offering. I told him no.
------------------
Someone who worked with me at another dot com was asked to have a meeting with management around 3pm. They told her they had to let her go, immediately, but he's a two week serveance package. She then told them she had a new job lined up already that starts monday.
I was glad it worked out for her in that case because management was a bunch of dumb fudges which is fodder for a whole nother post.
---------------------
When I worked at IBM, during my first few weeks there, we had a small group of html monkeys, including myself there working on their redesign. One person wasn't doing well, and she was let go. Unforunately she wasn't told she was let go until she showed up monday morning to find someone in her seat. I knew as of that friday (3 days prior) she was being let go (because the project manager was cool with me and was a big mouth). Neighter him nor the temp agency had the respect to call her and tell her prior to monday.
She called the agency and had it verified. They asked her "what are you doing there, you don't work there anymore". Mind you the agency was sued by IBM later on due to their business practices.
I was laid off, but since my boss really liked me (and opposed the layoff), I got a month's warning.
So my coworkers took me out to lunch to cheer me up, wish me well, and offer advice, tell me it would all work out for the best, etc.
When we came back from lunch, all of them were called in to HR, laid off, and told to clear out IMMEDIATELY.
So beginning that afternoon, and for the next month, it was just me and their empty desks.
"Those who have never entered upon scientific pursuits know not a tithe of the poetry by which they are surrounded."
Me: I, I, I, I, I didn't receive my paycheck this week.
Boss: Uh, you're gonna have to talk to Payroll about that.
Me: I, I did and they, and they said -
Boss: Uh, we're gonna need to move you downstairs into Storage B.
Me: No...I...I...
Boss: Uh, we have some new people coming in and we need all the space we can get.
Me: No...no...no...no...but...but...but...I, I, I -
Boss: If you could just pack up all of your stuff and move it down there, that would be terrific. See ya. (He walks away.)
Me: I can't...Excuse me. I believe you have my stapler?
BTW, I was at home taking care of my sick, disabled wife and infant son.
Nice that they kicked me when I was down.
WARN
Sorry. Should have made that a link in the original.
I was a contractor and my contract was up for renewal.
:-) Three months working for the moron was more than enough.
I was asked to come to a meeting where my knowledge would be evaluated (job was dbase in the dos days).
About the 2nd or 3rd question was: "How many files can you have open at one time [on a DOS system]?"
To which I replied "Yer kidding, right? I have no idea, nor do I care. I've never hit it, but I know that there's an environment variable that will let me change it at boot time. Could we just skip the questions that don't matter and could be looked up trivially?"
My "boss" wasn't impressed - mostly embarrassed, I hope. Anyway, I wasn't renewed, which was fine by me
First all we employees had to gather in the main meeting room. Management told us to reach under our seats. Below about 5 seats were taped slips of paper. Those five people had to perform in this humiliating contest. They had to do something or say something to embarass themselves. The president of the company is sitting there as judge. Whoever has the right to be the most mortified, in his judgement, won the showdown. I lost, but it was close. Had I won, I would have kept my job.
Then he starts calling us, one by one. Each of us goes up. Some were told to go back to their desks. They were the lucky ones. They survived to work another day. The rest of us had to pick up our commerative plates--the ones we got when we started--and hand them to the president. He said, "So-and-so, you're dead to us." Then he throws the plate into the fireplace (the office was an old mansion). Then we had to leave. People were bawling. Women were fainting. It was something I'll never be able to forget.
I don't think anybody can beat that one.
probably went something like this...
*phone rings*
Matt: Hello?
VP: Hey there, Matt...so, what are you wearing?
Matt: *vomits noisily*
VP: That's it *pouts* You're fired.
Karma: Chevy Kavalierma.
I remember it like it was yesterday, er, that is, because it was today.
PHB called me into his office and starts getting down on me for using Hungarian notation in my Java code. One of the guys on team had complained to him about it (that same gimp that always insists on prefixing every java instance variable with a 'this.' suffix). My boss of course, the typical PHB, blows the entire thing way out of preportion starts lecturing me about being culurally sensative (you see, my PHB is ACTUALLY Hungarian). But at this point I still think its about my coding style and hadn't realized that there was any misunderstanding. Figuring since we are wrapping up the Java-based project anyway and will soon be moving to an MFC-specific client-side app I say something to the effect of "Serge, slow down, if you don't like my style I can switch over to reverse polish if Hungarian isn't good enough for you". Well, at this point, he just lost his shit. He starts screaming at me thowing his arms left and right like a George Kostanza 'Koko The Monkey' imitation, screaming in some half-english, half-hungarian mish-mosh. At this point, I notice that people in the office have stopped working and just staring at us (the cubicle space is wide open and his office is against one of the walls with one of those big glass windows.) Then, I notice my buddy Higgins in the back laughing his ass off in the corner behind my boss. At the exact second I see my buddy, I realized my boss's confusion and just totally lost it. I just couldn't help it. I started laughing so hard I was in tears and I had to violently fight the urge to start rolling around the floor in laughter. Needless to say, the 'crazy Hungarian' (one of his many nicknames) was not impressed. He ordered me out of his office, so I just shook my head and laughed it off back to my desk, took an early lunch and didn't come back.
It will be interesting to see what happens tommorow. Worst case scenario, I've got my consulting side-line to hold me over until something better shows up. I also just finished burning a CD with the last dev version that has all sorts of GPL-infringing code. We'll see who has the last laugh in this one, which I guess is me already anyway...
All your base are belong to us!
I was called into the CEO's office. There were four pieces of paper on his desk. One was a check for my last two weeks pay, the second was 2 weeks severance pay, and the third was a letter of recommendation in positive terms. The fourth piece of paper was a contract wherein I would agree to never disclose that he had been embezzling, since that would endanger his negotiations to sell the company and smear his "good name," and that if I ever told anyone, I would be liable for $50k in liquidated damages, as the contract clearly stated. I was told I would only receive the checks if I signed the contract. I refused, I said it was illegal to withhold my previously owed pay. He screamed at me until he was blue in the face. I signed the contract and wrote "signed under diress" underneath the name. Embezzler CEO tore the paper up and threw it in my face. He said he'd blackball me forever unless I signed. He threatened to have his buddies break my legs if I didn't sign. I finally signed, just to get the asshole out of my face. I immediately went back to my desk and found the VP, who wanted me to hand off any work remaining on my CPU, whereupon I found that my hard disk had been formatted by the CEO, presumably to wipe the evidence I had collected of the his embezzling. The VP was positively livid, but he knew the CEO had done it and not me. VP was tasked with watching me clear out my desk, and escorted me off the premises. I drove to the bank and immediately cashed the checks. Then I consulted a lawyer as to whether a contract signed under diress would be valid. The lawyer said I could probably win and have the contract nullified in court, but what would be the point? I'd be free to tell the truth about embezzler CEO, but I'd spend thousands litigating it and there wouldn't be any money in it for me. The best I could win was a wrongful termination suit, and I could get my old job back, oh boy what a prize! The asshole CEO blackballed me anyway, I haven't had a decent job ever since.
Once my replacement was adequately trained I applied for my holidays to begin the following week. On friday afternoon I handed them my resignation and walked out the door (to cries of "you can't do this to us!").
Funnily enough, one of the other employee tried to emulate my technique but did it the wrong way around (hand in resignation, then request holidays for the remaining notifivation period). Strangely they didn't grant her holiday request. :)
Of course I still had to serve them documents explaining what laws they were in breach of when they tried to screw me out of the sick pay/time-in-leiu and the penalties if I had to sic the government on them. Very typical of the scams they played.
Their response to my leaving was to fire half of the remaining staff... I felt bad about that for some time. They also demoted one of their most loyal employees to cover the gap (or at least ensure the directors wouldn't be bothered by customers) and he was so shocked that they would repay him in this way that he quit, taking about half of the companies servers with him (they were his).
Ironically the replacement I trained and I have remained good friends and our kids play together most weeks. He has just resigned from the same company with the difference that they had not let him hire/train a replacement.
Oh and they have just released an enormous update to their software. They are soooo fucked....
I love my current job and the people I work with. They respect me and I respect them. It's amazing what a difference it makes.
Q.
Insert Signature Here
... I refreshed my browser...
... and got this...
Got another job the same day. Aah. dotcomm days, where are ye?