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How Were You Fired?

Posted by Cliff on from the informing-you-in-a-not-so-gently-manner dept.

IanBevan asks: "A couple of years ago, the company I was working for was taken over by a larger competitor. I was told, right up until the last minute, that my development job was safe. Shortly thereafter, our illustrious team leader issued a new project plan, and I discovered that all my tasks were suddenly due to finish in about one week's time. Not being a great believer in coincidence, I asked my boss if there was 'anything he would like to tell me'. Of course, there was. Looking back this seems quite amusing now, but it could certainly have been better handled by the PHBs. I was just wondering, how have other Slashdot readers discovered that they have become 'surplus to requirements'?"

9 of 399 comments (clear)

  1. Nice by Evro · · Score: 5, Interesting

    Showed up to work and didn't get paid. CEO didn't come in that day and nobody could tell me when/if we would be getting our money. Turned out that no, we never did get our money. Fucker called us in a few weeks later and asked us to continue working for free. Meanwhile he got his daughter a modeling agent, cell phone, various invitations to hoity-toity parties... a real class act.

    Read my old journal entries for how this nearly ruined my life, yay!

    --
    rooooar
    1. Re:Nice by swillden · · Score: 5, Interesting

      Turned out that no, we never did get our money. Fucker called us in a few weeks later and asked us to continue working for free. Meanwhile he got his daughter a modeling agent, cell phone, various invitations to hoity-toity parties... a real class act.

      T'ain't nothin'.

      I have an association with (and that's as far as I'm gonna go here) a company which hadn't paid its employees regularly for over a year, though they were all sticking it out in hopes that things would get better. Well, the company got about $50K, just enough to make payroll for the first time in three months. The CFO was getting ready to cut checks when the CEO walked in and told him to hold up, he needed a check for $28,000 first, so the employees would have to get what was left. When the CFO inquired as to what unexpected expense had cropped up that had to be paid now, the CEO replied that his daughter had wrecked her car and he was going to buy her a new one.

      The CFO threatened to blow the whistle and walk out with the entire staff, so after some heated words the CEO finally relented and let him pay the employees. It was a private company and the CEO had the legal right to take the money, but the walkout would have killed the company dead (not that it lasted much longer anyway).

      Got it all from the bookkeeper who was in the room at the time this went down.

      Absolutely unbelievable, but about par for the course for this particular CEO.

      --
      Note to ACs: I usually delete AC replies without reading them. If you want to talk to me, log in.
  2. Locked Doors by Breakerofthings · · Score: 5, Funny

    I arrived at work on the day of the layoffs to find the doors locked; the only door unlocked was the main entrance, staffed by security guards, inside and out. When I entered, there were processing tables, you told them your name, they told you which room to report to.
    So, I was escorted to the room, where the corp counsel was waiting; he went through my severance package: essentially 2 weeks salary IF I agreed to sign of saying I wouldn't sue them; I didn't, because It appeared to me that they were violating WARN ...
    The funny part: this guy then demanded my company ID, since it was company property. "Fine", I say, "after I retrieve my personal belongings from my desk." He says I can make an appointment to come get my stuff next week. I say "fine. You can likewise make an appointment to come by my house and get your ID next week." He says, you don't understand, we need your ID, it is ours. blah blah blah. End with "You don't understand: I am not turning it over until I get my stuff. You can't make me, and you can't threaten me; what are you going to do, fire me? It's a matter of principle, and there is no room for negotiation. Besides, I intend to get my stuff, today, regardless, so you can just make this easy on both of us and avoid an ugly situation if you just let me collect my belongings, which is what you SHOULD do anyway ..."

    I was escorted to my desk to get my stuff. Who knew that they wanted it back that bad? (I was the only one that left with a box; everyone else got a laugh out of that one...)

    1. Re:Locked Doors by Inthewire · · Score: 5, Interesting

      I agree.
      I was "let go" a year and a half ago.
      I packed my things, and as I was leaving I remembered that half of the RAM in my workstation was mine - I'd installed it after an upgrade at home.
      The network admin knew this, as I'd cleared it with him and done the install in his workshop, but he hadn't come in yet.
      I mentioned it to my escort and got a noncommital grunt.
      I was peeved, but not much, and I let it go.

      Good thing, because eight months later I got a call from the same company - they needed someone to take over their core program and my name had come up.
      Now I'm back, making twice the money, and because of the wording of our agreement I own every LOC I produce.
      That didn't seem like a big deal (to either party) when I took the job, but now I'm rewriting the entire application.

      Don't burn bridges when you can bomb cities.

      --


      Writers imply. Readers infer.
  3. Not fired, more like... abandoned. by trentfoley · · Score: 5, Funny

    In the early 1980's, I worked for a software spin-off of an engineering company that was going down the tubes rapidly. One Friday I went to work to find:
    1) A very polite policeman at the door.
    2) No electricity.
    3) No management people.
    4) Confused employees.
    5) An envelope at my desk with a check for 1/2 of my pay.
    6) On the memo line, it read: "WYSIWYG"
    7...
    8) no profit.

  4. I haven't by Second+Vampyre · · Score: 5, Funny

    I haven't been fired (yet) you insensitive clod. Posting on Slashdot at work certainly isn't helping though.

  5. Layoffs done right by scalveg · · Score: 5, Interesting

    On a Tuesday morning, early in the month, after being at work a half hour or so, I got email calling all employees to a 10AM meeting in the only room big enough to hold us all (~300 probably).

    The CEO seemed genuinely aggrieved at having to lay many of us (40%) off, reassured us that even then, at the peak of the dot-com bust, we would be getting 8 weeks of salary as severance, and our health coverage was paid through the end of the month. He asked us to return to our desks, where we would begin having one-on-one meetings with our immediate supervisors to learn the details of our layoffs, or new job responsibilities.

    As I returned to my desk, I was considering all the projects I would need to wrap up and hand off if I were among those laid off, but when I got back, my computer no longer had access to the network.

    I picked up my phone to call IS, but it, too, was disconnected.

    It was by then obvious what was about to happen, and I had a pleasant enough conversation with my boss when my turn came. Turned out he had also been let go, and we discussed people we knew at other companies that might have use for me or him.

    1) Early in the day, early in the week. Time to head home and immediately get started on the job hunt.

    2) Early in the month, so I didn't have to worry about COBRA for a few weeks.

    3) Real severance package.

    I'm not sure what they could have done better, other than not laying us off in the first place.

    Chris Owens
    San Carlos, CA

  6. It went something like... by wgnorm · · Score: 5, Funny

    Me: I, I, I, I, I didn't receive my paycheck this week.

    Boss: Uh, you're gonna have to talk to Payroll about that.

    Me: I, I did and they, and they said -

    Boss: Uh, we're gonna need to move you downstairs into Storage B.

    Me: No...I...I...

    Boss: Uh, we have some new people coming in and we need all the space we can get.

    Me: No...no...no...no...but...but...but...I, I, I -

    Boss: If you could just pack up all of your stuff and move it down there, that would be terrific. See ya. (He walks away.)

    Me: I can't...Excuse me. I believe you have my stapler?

  7. cruel by falsification · · Score: 5, Interesting
    Mine was very, very cruel. I don't even want to talk about it. While I was there, it was great. But here goes.

    First all we employees had to gather in the main meeting room. Management told us to reach under our seats. Below about 5 seats were taped slips of paper. Those five people had to perform in this humiliating contest. They had to do something or say something to embarass themselves. The president of the company is sitting there as judge. Whoever has the right to be the most mortified, in his judgement, won the showdown. I lost, but it was close. Had I won, I would have kept my job.

    Then he starts calling us, one by one. Each of us goes up. Some were told to go back to their desks. They were the lucky ones. They survived to work another day. The rest of us had to pick up our commerative plates--the ones we got when we started--and hand them to the president. He said, "So-and-so, you're dead to us." Then he throws the plate into the fireplace (the office was an old mansion). Then we had to leave. People were bawling. Women were fainting. It was something I'll never be able to forget.

    I don't think anybody can beat that one.