Ig Nobel Awards 2003

prostoalex writes "The Ig Nobel awards for 2003 were presented at Harvard University. Hold your breath for the winners of this year's awards from Annals of Improbable Research. Engineering: the inventors of the Murphy's law. Physics: authors of 'An Analysis of the Forces Required to Drag Sheep over Various Surfaces' report. Medicine: the scientists, who discovered that London taxi drivers are smarter than average London residents. Psychology: authors of the 'Politicians' Uniquely Simple Personalities' report. Chemistry: a Japanese scientist who studied a bronze statue strangely ignored by pigeon population. Literature: the author of more than 80 scientific reports on amusing statistical information. Economics: the man, who viewed the entire country of Liechtenstein as a large convention center. Interdisciplinary: authors of 'Chickens Prefer Beautiful Humans' study. Biology: first documented case of homosexual necrophilia in the mallard duck species. Links and pictures are available from the official Web site, linked above."

Comments

I knew it.

[grub]

Biology: first documented case of homosexual necrophilia in the mallard duck species

I always was suspicious of those damn mallards.. Their "Oh, I'm just an innocent duck" quacks and what not..

Re:I knew it.

[jdehnert]

Biology: first documented case of homosexual necrophilia in the mallard duck species. Links and pictures are available from the official Web site, linked above."

Oh goody! Pictures too!

Just try and imagine the conversation that took place when this reasearch was submitted.

I buy it.

[CGP314]

the scientists, who discovered that London taxi drivers are smarter than average London residents

Makes sense to me. They charge a small fortune to go a small distance, and we still pay it. : )

Re:I buy it.

[Anonymous Coward]

Then they tell ya about their 20 years service in the SAS and how they think they should have jumped on Yemen back in 1976 but at the last moment they got called back by MI6 with whom the cabby himself has "very good standing".

One stopped his cab in from of my house and talked to me about his revision of JFK and what he thinks were the reasons behind his assassination.

Lemme tell you this, London cabbies are too smart for their own good. They know more about secret operations, international deals and about subterranean civilisations controlling us thru psychic waves than the entire MOD does.

And whatever they say... don't reply back.

That's the Internet for you

[wirde]

Biology: first documented case of homosexual necrophilia in the mallard duck species.

Believe it or not, they actually have pictures of the act as well. That's the Internet for you, nothing but pr0n.

Dead man walking

[Brahmastra]

Lal Bihari, of Uttar Pradesh, India, for a triple accomplishment: First, for leading an active life even though he has been declared legally dead; Second, for waging a lively posthumous campaign against bureaucratic inertia and greedy relatives; and Third, for creating the Association of Dead People.

Wonder if he can refuse to pay bills, citing death as the reason.

Sheep?

[PsychoKiller]

'An Analysis of the Forces Required to Drag Sheep over Various Surfaces'

Let me guess, these were Scottish researchers, right?

Re:The Knowledge

[tiled_rainbows]

The scary thing about this that most london cabbies seem to be bigoted, racist, sexist, quasi-fascist, foaming-at-the-mouth right-wingers.

I always thought it was just due to the buildup of misanthropic rage from the job they do, but this research raises the disturbing possibility is that maybe their opinions only seem offensive to me because I'm not smart enough to understand them, and that they're actually right.

Genuine quote from when I took a cab last winter:

Me: Cold out tonight, eh?

Cabbie: Yeah. Still, if it kills off a few of these homeless people it's not a bad thing, eh?

SCO missing?

[mao che minh]

I'm suprised that SCO's McBride isn't on this list somewhere, for his spectacular achievement in Chemistry: Turning bullshit into gold.

Homosexual necrophilia in mallard ducks

[metamatic]

There was also a study of sado-masochistic bestial necrophilia by jockeys, but it turned out the researcher was just flogging a dead horse.

Re:Chickens Prefer Beautiful Humans

[35ft_twinkie]

Not quite. Ugly people have a much better chance of being passed over as the choice to be a giant slug crime lord's next love-slave-who-has-to-wear-a-bronze-bikini.

Mercifully, the will just be killed.

Re:Chickens Prefer Beautiful Humans

[big_O_of_n!]

Of course, corpulent humans prefer fried chickens, so it all evens out.

Re:"Politicians' Uniquely Simple Personalities"

[switcha]

I want clothes made of that stuff [bronze] dammit (and a car)!

So, you wanna be a pimp? ;)

Re:Chickens Prefer Beautiful Humans

[blancolioni]

Beautiful people have an advantage in everything.

Yes, we do.

And I'd appreciate it if you'd wear your paper bag next time you post something. Thanks.