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Expensive Geek Toys Roundup
An anonymous reader writes "I was recently asked by a coworker to come up with a list of <implied> expensive </implied> and cool gadgets for a VIP. He was interested in anything that was up-and-coming, rare and the usual odd combination of devices (ie. anything with a camera/WiFi that shouldn't have it). I figured that since it was Friday, it may be a good day to see what the /. crew has up their sleeves."
I bet this VIP is trying to keep up with them damn, rich, cool yet geeky Jones' who laugh at him while he takes his Aibo for a stroll while riding his Segway. Like, that Segway is so 3 months ago and the Aibo, OH MY GOD -- its like, ancient.
PLEASE do not respond to this article! I can't afford it!
I've had this sig for three days.
this
I figured that since it was Friday, it may be a good day to see what the /. crew has up their sleeves.
Are you implying I don't have anything better to do on a Friday night?!
Well Sir, you are correct.
I thought it was supposed to be hooked up to a web cam inside the fridge so you could tell if the light was on inside when the fridge was closed.
W9x:Thanks for the make-work project Bill.
I don't have a product in mind, but I recommend you take 2 weeks and leave no stone unturned in your seach. Make sure you spend time at home in deep contemplation on the issue. Take field trips to see what cool stuff other VIPs are using. Maybe fly to Europe and attend a trade show or two.
After that, spend 4 weeks writing your report.
8)
Isn't a G5 cluster one of the newest/oldest cool things mentioned on /. lately? Better yet, it's pretty easy to make hideously expensive. And you might even consider creating a in-memory Oracle database using 10,000 G5 machines. The VIP would have his/her own Google :)
btw, can we use that as a noun yet? Like a gaggle of geese, a herd a cattle or a school of fish, can we have a Google of computers?
I hear that there's a record-breaking Dorito selling on eBay...
I'm going to the casino. Don't gamble.
>Well you can't get geekier and VIPer than a Seqway.
I dunno. What about a Sony Aibo riding a Segway?
10. Colossus: The Forbin Project.
9. The Dobbertin Surface Orbiter. It is still not yet a submarine.
8. "Green Laser Pointer at Think Geek.com"
7. Hey McFly! How much would you sell that Delorean for?
6. Knight Industries 2000
5. Friggin' sharks with friggin' lasers on their heads.
4. That Saturn 5 lying on its side at that space museum. Time for destination moon!
3. "The Jupiter 2". Forget a trek ship: this thing once passed through a galaxy in one night.
2. The Atari 1450XLD. I'm still waiting for one after all these years. If Alan Alda still has his, I bet he won't let it go for cheap.
1. SCO. What geek would not love to buy this company and play with it fo a while? Muhahahaha.
Don't blame Durga. I voted for Centauri.
From their product catalog:
"The Bioweapons division of the Weyland-Yutani corporation is proud to release its new Predalien-model drone! This beautiful marvel of roving mayhem is capable of a forty foot vertical or horizontal pounce, can head-bite your enemies from up to several feet away, can sneak up on competing executives along ceilings, walls, and through air ducts, and is armed with a six-foot barbed tail, nine inch claws, four inch fangs, and a sixteen inch extensible subjaw with three inch fangs! Optional Architect remote control not included. Satisfaction guaranteed!"
BUT, of course, you should read the disclaimer (it's in very tiny print at the back of the catalog):
"Weyland-Yutani corporation makes all AlienTech(tm) available on an As-Is basis, with no warranty whatsoever. Additionally, customer agrees to fully indemnify Weyland-Yutani corporation from any and all legal repurcussions that may result from customer's use of AlienTech(tm) products, including (but not limited to) impregnation by larval AlienTech, deaths of coworkers, family, pets, entire community, or detonation of spacecraft or Atmospheric Processor Units. Use AlienTech wisely."
Farewell! It's been a fine buncha years!
If ya like em, send em a stripper with strategically placed /.'s and a redhat. If ya don't then get one of the unix administrators to dress up as a penguin. If you really don't like em, get em windows that break when you try to install them.
There's a growing sense that even if The Future comes,
most of us won't be able to afford it.
-- Lemmy
...and see what he comes up with.
Me, I'd say use the money to buy as many old Macs as he can, run Linux on them and create his own VIP Beowulf cluster. Er...wait - VIP? Nevermind.
www.brownsauce.org
Okay, I Googled for Bluetooth Vibrator and surprisingly came up with quite the list.
-=- Many seek good nights and lose good days.
The TailGator is a gaspowered blender.
No one really needs one of these, but they are pretty cool.
http://www.totallygross.com/
Powerskips - supercharged pogo-stilts
how about a cigarette lighter for your PC?
Left 4 Dead Gaming Group - http://www.l4dgg.com
Just buy a SCO linux license for him! ;-)
Yeah, I'm city livin' chillin' but I'm country at heart...
For the man who has everything, something to haul all his shit around in.
If tits were wings it'd be flying around.
My ultimate geek gadget would be: a geek.
Then I can ask the geek to do things like "round up all of the coolest geek gadgets and let me know what they are". I will force my pet geek to address me as a "VIP" and interface with slashdot when they can't ask my questions (which makes me feel like I own many more geeks by proxy).
I will keep my geek in a cubicle next to my aquarium full of scuba-divers.
A DVD of Office Space
Chip H.
"I was recently asked by a coworker to come up with a list of expensive and cool gadgets for a VIP.
If the VIP's in management, how about, I dunno, a brain?
Or for that matter, a heart or some courage .
Opinions on the Twiddler2 hand-held keyboard?
Of course the light will be off! But once you turn that camera off, bam! - the light comes back on.