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Gates Comdex Keynote Shows Plans, Matrix Spoof

Posted by simoniker on from the he-knows-kung-fu dept.

An anonymous reader writes "According to Eweek, Bill Gates' keynote speech at this year's Comdex showed Microsoft's 'focus on security, spam and [the] tablet PC', including a new version of its Internet Security and Acceleration (ISA) Server, an extension of the SmartScreen Technology for spam prevention, and the next version of the Microsoft Windows XP Tablet PC Edition operating system. But the showstopper was a filmed spoof of The Matrix (screencaps available here), with Gates and Steve Ballmer as Morpheus and Neo respectively, and including a jab at Linux."

19 of 803 comments (clear)

  1. It all makes sense now by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    Gates plans to trap humanity in his own MS Matrix. Of course, there will be bugs in the system allowing people like Neo to pop-up and hack in.

    1. Re:It all makes sense now by Mr+Smidge · · Score: 5, Funny

      Ooh, ooh.. is SCO the architect, creator of the Matrix?

    2. Re:It all makes sense now by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      Two boxes cracked in two years, that really is poor; it's disgusting that companies can get away with selling this rubbish. And it's all stolen from honest software houses like SCO, and then purposefully made insecure by Torvolds and his commie cronies, to undermine democracy.

    3. Re:It all makes sense now by fishbonez · · Score: 5, Funny

      Agent Gates: I hate this place. This GNU. This open source. This license, whatever you want to call it. I can't stand it any longer. It's the free software, if there is such a thing. I feel saturated by it. I can taste your GPL. And every time I do, I fear that I've somehow been infected by it.

      --
      Frylock: That's not a toy!
      Master Shake: You say that about everything you own. You should own toys. They're fun.
  2. Still Better by The_Rippa · · Score: 5, Funny

    Hmm...still looks better than Revolutions.

  3. Hmmm... by Bob+Vila's+Hammer · · Score: 5, Funny

    I didn't know the Borg had a sense of humor.

    --


    --"The perfect example of the man of action is the suicide." - William Carlos Williams
  4. And starring the tablet PC... by Nailer · · Score: 5, Funny

    As Switch. One of the Nebuchadnezzar crew that got killed really early on the first movie and was promptly forgotten about forever.

  5. Gates and Ballmer? Which one was Neo? by u-235-sentinel · · Score: 5, Funny

    I haven't seen it (yet) but doesn't Neo die in the movie :D

    Which is Neo again? :D

    --
    Has Comcast disconnected your Internet account? Same here. You can read about it at http://comcastissue.blogspot.com
  6. What's wrong with this picture. by FrostedWheat · · Score: 5, Funny

    Neo: What is the Matrix?
    Morpheus: Unfortunately no one can be told what the Matrix is.
    Neo: Why?
    Morpheus: My tablet PC just crashed.

  7. Re:If Microsoft built the matrix by Verteiron · · Score: 5, Funny

    Actually, that doesn't sound too different from the movie plot. Agent Smith obviously hadn't been patched because Neo exploited him immediately upon gaining Administrator access. And we learned that the Matrix must be "reloaded" periodically to fix the humans that "leak" from the main program...

    --
    End of lesson. You may press the button.
  8. Re:If Microsoft built the matrix by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    And Neo would have to pay the Oracle $60 up-front just to talk to her over the phone.

  9. Re:I have...nothhing by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    At least you were original... oh, wait--nevermind. You were just another imitator. Please, world, I beg of you: bite styles wantonly and give credit never! That's the only way for culture to survive!

  10. Re:Gates and Ballmer? Which one was Neo? by Darth_brooks · · Score: 5, Funny

    Wow, he's called "steve-o" ? The marketing / PR folks screwed the pooch a bit there.

    Nothing like having one of your two most recognizable corporate officers sharing a name with a guy who's known for stapling his ball sack to his leg.
    The other Steve-o

    --
    There are some people that if they don't know, you can't tell 'em.
  11. Special Guest Star... by D-Cypell · · Score: 5, Funny

    Larry Elison as the Oracle!

  12. Please don't make Clippy an agent by GuyMannDude · · Score: 5, Funny

    Gates plans to trap humanity in his own MS Matrix.

    Let's just pray Agent Clippy doesn't learn how to copy himself!

    GMD

    --
    watch this
  13. Re:If Microsoft built the matrix by Evil+Adrian · · Score: 5, Funny

    If the matrix was built on a Linux platform, it would never work, because device drivers for human beings wouldn't exist.

    --
    evil adrian
  14. Linux vs Microsoft by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    "First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they attack you, then you win."
    -Gandhi

    So what stage are we at now?

  15. Re:Ballmer as Neo? by sharkey · · Score: 5, Funny
    I can much more easily picture Morpheus dancing around the Zion cave shouting "DEVELOPERS! DEVELOPERS!" ad naseum, than Neo.

    No kidding. Neo'd be jumping around yelling, "Woah......Woah......Woah." Developers IS a multi-syllable word, after all.

    --

    --
    "Outlook not so good." That magic 8-ball knows everything! I'll ask about Exchange Server next.
  16. Re:Streaming Video Links by lobsterGun · · Score: 5, Funny

    I think I speak for more people when I say,"Who gives a shit?"