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Breakey Elevates Key Wrestling To Artform

Posted by simoniker on from the strong-right-hand-important-to-adolescents dept.

Jesse writes "My local games store has been running tournaments for one of the stranger non-video games to come out recently. Breakey is a 'collectable key game' made by Upper Deck. That's right - collect keys and compete with your friends to see who has the stongest key! This is accomplished by inserting two plastic keys into each other, and twisting until someone's key breaks. That person loses. Oh, and the winner keeps all the broken keys." Unsurprisingly, it appears that critics such as online comic Full Frontal Nerdity are already poking fun at the concept.

13 of 93 comments (clear)

  1. Re:This is BRILLIANT by Smidge204 · · Score: 3, Funny

    I'll just wait for them to issue the special, limited edition carbon steel breakey... ..then the day shall be mine!
    =Smidge=

  2. Pencil fights by KirkH · · Score: 5, Funny

    Reminds me of the pencil fights we used to have on the bus going to and from elementary school. I wrote with a lot a half-pencils back in those days...until I started buying those huge 1/2 inch diameter pencils!

  3. Re:Anyone try this? by prator · · Score: 4, Funny

    Fear not. There is going to be plenty of trendy, crappy stuff that your son will want when he is old enough.

    -prator

  4. Key Envy by djNocturne · · Score: 5, Funny

    Unless they start producing these things in the shape of imaginary animals, this concept will dry up and blow away a few hours from now. Kids like pokemon because of the creature angle. If you were to replace the creatues with, say, all of the US presidents, leaving everything else the same, the pokemon phenomenon would have been a non-event.

    Also, since I *know* at least half of the slashdot crowd initially read the headline the same way I did, I'll be the first to make the obvious "When I first read that ..." comment: When I first read that, I thought we were talking about crypto keys. You know, collect keys, see who's is stronger, etc. Now *that* I could dig:

    "Hey honey, went down to the comic store and bought some new BreaKey cards. I have a good feeling about this new 256-bit DES Charmander key I got. Let's battle! ... Oops, I guess I should have waited until it evolved into an AES Charizard."

    --
    /* Pleurez, pleurez, mes yeux, et fondez vous en eau! La moitie de ma vie a mis l'autre au tombeau. - Corneille */
    1. Re:Key Envy by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      Kids like pokemon because of the creature angle. If you were to replace the creatues with, say, all of the US presidents, leaving everything else the same, the pokemon phenomenon would have been a non-event.

      William H. Taft, I choose you!

  5. The One True Key (Re:Uber Key?) by MexicanMenace · · Score: 1, Funny

    It's called the "You Shall Not Passkey". :)

  6. Um, yeah? by Hard_Code · · Score: 4, Funny

    Yeah! The game I've been waiting for! I've always wondered: "Me, is there a game that fulfills my need to break things, and then keep the broken pieces of that thing?" and I've always had to answer "No, Me, there isn't, you will just have to continue buying and breaking plastic silverware."

    I hope this spawns a whole new genre of pointless games:

    __Breakey: Crowbar Vs. Car__
    __Breakey: Baseball Bat Vs. Seedy Convenience Store Window__
    __Breakey: Install New Drivers Vs. Stable System___
    __Breakey: Ethnic Slur Vs. Your Nose__

    and finally:

    __Breakey: Slashdot Reader Vs. Serious Human Relationship__

    --

    It's 10 PM. Do you know if you're un-American?
  7. Re:Erm... by Divide+By+Zero · · Score: 2, Funny
    This thing has more angles to it than a crumpled piece of paper.

    ...and is just about as interesting.

    --
    Dare to Hope. Prepare to be Disappointed.
  8. Re:Slick marketing ploy by MarkGriz · · Score: 4, Funny

    The nice thing about it is that it prepares kids for the future. When their disposable income increases, they will inevitably get involved in BreaKomputer. This is where you and your friends spend obscene amounts of money on the latest PC hardware. Whoever has the fastest framerate on UT wins. Then Doom3 is released, rendering the slowest PC in the group unusable, forcing it to be replaced with even faster hardware. This person is then declared the new winner.

    This process repeats endlessly until Bill Gates and Michael Dell rule the world (one takes the northern hemisphere, the other the southern).
    Except Antarctia - this is where all Linux users and penguins are forced to live.

    --
    Beauty is in the eye of the beerholder.
  9. Re:This is BRILLIANT by dewie · · Score: 5, Funny

    1. Obtain regular, plastic, breakey.
    2. Fashion exact replica in carbon steel, thinly coated with plastic to avert suspicion.
    3. Profit!!!

    (Disclaimer: Profit may be in the form of broken plastic keys and crying children.)

    --
    Jurisprudence Fetishist Gets Off On A Technicality --theonion.com
  10. Sounds a lot like... by WebGangsta · · Score: 3, Funny
    Battle of the M&M's.

    You know, identify the strongest M&M in the bag, then mail it back to the M&M/Mars company for breeding purposes.

  11. Re:Titanium keys? by DamnRogue · · Score: 2, Funny

    "neighborhoods full of kids with massive forearms."

    Yeah, but that's not from playing breakey...

  12. My key is unbreakable by SamSim · · Score: 2, Funny

    4096 bits. Bring it on

    --
    qntm.org