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Online Gaming for Couples?
psuedo_samurai asks: "My longtime girlfriend recently had to move to complete her studies at a University, which is nowhere near where I live. Talking on the phone is quickly becoming old, as I'm a typical guy and hate being on the phone longer than 3 minutes, but I try. So I was thinking - I like games, she likes to talk, why not combine the two? So are there any online games suggested for couples using a headset? I can't see Counter-Strike or Rainbow Six working, but I was thinking maybe DDR Ultramix on Xbox Live? How about PC titles with headset support? Any suggestions?"
...but my wife and I both play neverwinter nights- great multiplayer game that can provide good laughs if you have a good module. I highly suggest the nordock module.
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I really don't see how gaming would help. The idea is communication and gaming would just cloud that with alterior motives. Not only that but you would also both have to choose "avatars" in the gaming world presenting more complications.
How about writing letters, sending nice postcards, and an occasional phone call. Or even if you must go the technological route a communal blog?
.... how you suggest that one. Or your character may lose all his nookie points. What!?!? So talking to me is so hard...... You may not wanna go there.
Free Mac Mini Yeah, it's
I'm a typical guy and hate being on the phone longer than 3 minutes, but I try. So I was thinking - I like games, she likes to talk, why not combine the two?
Not knowing the full situation I have to ask: Have you asked her if she'd like to be in an online game for longer than 3 minutes? If she's like many (most?) women she would want to have your full attention during a conversation (the 4 other
It sounds like you want to have your cake and eat it too; make sure this is what she wants before you send her all sorts of geek gear. She may just twist your intentions into thinking you're pushing her away.
Trolling is a art,
"So I was thinking - I like games, she likes to talk, why not combine the two?"
The question is does *she* like games. I'm not going to try to give relationship advice here, but you'd probably be better off asking *her* what game she'd like to play (if any) rather than asking Slashdot.
your girlfried would appreciate you talking to her while playing? Most girls I know require the full attention of the male CPU....
It's my experience that you don't get to talk much while playing a game.
I guess it depends on which game you are playing, but still. Odds are you'll be too busy focusing on the events of the game to be typing in sentence after sentence.
Whenever I decide to play Return to Castle Wolfenstein: Enemy Territory with friends, unless the whole server is full of friends I really don't do much talking to my friend. Once in a while there's the occasional haha killed you again or damn you suck but generally speaking, I'm more concentrated on the game.
Another issue...does she even like games? I mean, making her play a game just to get to talk to you seems a little bit...inconsiderate? If she's a gamer, then there's no problem, but if she isn't, expect her to be less than thrilled at the prospect.
Now, I realize you were asking about headsets, so you wouldn't have so much of a problem with the typing. Still, almost the same rule applies - you will not want to engage in conversations of reasonable complexity because it will impedete your performance in game.
I guess it could work, but I suggest you learn to stay on the phone a little longer, for the sake of your girlfriend.
How come this guy has a girlfriend and I don't?
Don't worry; with thinking like that, he won't have a girlfriend for too much longer.
~jeff
as a girl geek, i would say first check and see if she likes gaming. if so, my long distance boyfriend and i play worms armageddon. just one rule of gaming with a girlfriend - never keep score and don't get too competitive.
increase the peace
The only way that this scenario could be any sadder is if the guy had met his girlfriend playing Star Wars Galaxies, and he asked her to marry him "in game," and she turned out to be a 40-year-old man.
Damn, I used to have a link to a Star Wars message board that described exactly that. It was so pathetic it gave me the chills!
Anyway, in general I think "games" and "girlfriends" are not compatible concepts.
Try Yahoo Games. Seriously. Yahoo Pool is widely popular and is a great way to mindlessly have fun and chat with people.
If your gf isn't the dork you are, it might be the only thing that works.
You don't like to TALK to your girlfriend? Why are you going out with her then? You're honestly going to tell her that you prefer videogames to talking to her? Are you insane??
If you think my reaction is a poor one, wait until you hear hers.
Here's the thing, if the goal here is to have a conversation, then, no, this probably isn't a good solution. If the goal, on the other hand, is to create a sense of being together, then this would work well.
I mean, when you are in a relationship long enough, you tend to have less conversations, and it's more time just spent being around the other person. Doing things together, or sometimes just being in the same place but doing your own things.
If you have a long distance relationship, it's easy to stay in communication these days. The trick is creating that sense of physical proximity, that the other person is somehow there. This may be possible, to a degree, through a gaming environment.
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I would recommend an Xbox, with Xbox live.
3 Excellent games that women really do like, and are Live capable:- Top Spin tennis. Excellent game. Women like it too!
- Links 2004 golf. Cool thing is, you don't have to play at the same skill level. Lag is not an issue and it can be fairly easy- yet still challenging.
- The grand-daddy of all chick games- Tetris. Comes with new Xboxes. Good game, and chicks love it.
All three of them will let you play, and are good games. Yet all of them are women friendly, but guys like them too. My wife plays all of them, even without me.No reason to lie.
Or you could just stick w/ the phone conversations and spruce them up w/ some phone sex.
My GF and I are the most hardcore of hardcore gamers. :P Okay, obviously not very hardcore if we're playing games like Final Fantasy XI and Ragnarok Online (*giggle*) but it works.
.hack :D) and something where you can go and feel like you're 'doing' something together (even if it's hunting little rats in the forest). When we just wanna goof off for a while it's fun.
We both travel around a lot so we've had to keep in contact on the phone and over the Internet. Our best choice for a game is a friendly, community-based RPG. Something where you can walk around and talk and feel a bit more 'there' with each other (you have no idea how much the graphics and emotes do for things, dunno if anyone's watched
Obviously this requires that you have a good imagination, lots of time to waste, and you both like that sorta shit. But IMHO find something that is MODERATELY active (ahem, not quake) but not something that *only* focuses on talking. Cause that would be maddening eventually, even if you're in love beyond all imagination.
Other suggestions would be similarly 'beer & pretzel' games, maybe you both have an addiction to Civ or some cardgame or something. I'd really REALLY push for a virtual world, though, because it inspires the imagination and won't get old so fast.
Again, not sure if this would work with you, but I've done it successfully for quite a while now. Two or three times a week I'd just tell all my friends to go suck it and play with her that night. Course, straight chicks just suck, so it might not work, but at any rate TALK IT OUT WITH HER! WHAT ARE YOU DOING ASKING HERE! Tsk tsk tsk.
well, i dont think that she is banging a guy at the moment, but i think that the future looks bleak. ive been in a long distance relationship, i mean LONG 8000 miles long. and even though i happen to be a strong person, and my gf is also, here are my observations about what tends to happen in long distance relationships.
first the problem is communication, since we are a social species its the most important thing in a relationship, because most problems in a relationship are derived from communication. and when two people seperate, the communication breaks down, i can count plenty of great friends that i never talk to because they moved away. and the writer of the column said that he can hardly stay on the phone for more than three minutes. moreover the only way that he can stay interested in her is to be playing online games, something about video games (and pron) activates some sort of chemicals in the male brain that seems to keep us happy, but most (not all) women tend to hate video games. so if he is having problems keeping intrest. how does he expect her to keep intrest.
also men in long distance relationships are vunerable because thier sex drives, but that can be appeased by pron. but on the other hand women are vunerable because the fact that they need an emotional connection (unlike some guys). a guy who is truely dedicated can last for ages without even talking to his GF and feel that he loves her. on the other hand it seems to me that if a woman doesnt talk to a man for a long time, she starts to feel tortured inside.
i think that what MAY happen is that she might end up finding someone else who can meet her emotional needs, and who is a bit more mature than this guy. and its probably all for the better.
My wife used to nag about "all that damn time you spend on the computer" until recently. I heard from a friend about a new game called URU that is like a sequel to Myst and Riven. I don't normally play games and my wife definitely does not...but we bought this and we're actually pretty impressed. It's not a shoot em up, and you pretty much just figure out puzzles and stuff but the graphics are great and the online version is just about ready.
You can play the online game for free right now while they are working out the bugs but the features that may interest you are voice chat (not yet implemented, so currently it's text chatting) and the fact that you can explore with whomever you want. You can create avatars that actually look like you and overall the game seems to have a lot of potential...if you like that kind of game.
2 things to warn you about. You need to play this game on a pretty decent computer with a good video card, and if your girlfriend ends up like my wife...you won't get as much work done anymore! Instead of her constant nagging about just plain being on the computer too much, now it's nagging that I spend too much time working when we should be playing the game together :)
-Pat
It's not easy to maintain a relationship like that. It took me years to get the woman I married interested in email. Moving to a different state was tough. All she would do is mail, even though she was a draftsman and her dad maintained a computer with email on it and gave her an account with her ISP. It was very frustrating to read week old letters when we had much faster mailing set up. I put up with it and simply snail mailed her back or phoned if anything was urgent. She did not like that her dad could read her mail and considered my email nagging a drag and a put off. Don't go there with games.
If she was interested in a particular game, that could be a common interest and great. Of course, if that were the case, he would be asking her not Slashdot.
My wife now likes email and IM. She's root on her own machine in her own house and that works for her. We keep up a lively conversation when I go to work. One day, I'm going to find a game that we might like to play together.
Friends don't help friends install M$ junk.
Most of my female friends if you suggested they play tennis or golf games, they'd just as rather whack you over the head with a racket or club. Girls can be just as bloodthirsty in gaming as guys, and it really does boil down to personal preference. Tetris is great from time to time, but it gets old. MMORPGs can be good (I'm eagerly awaiting the release of World of Warcraft so my bf and I can play, and yes we signed up for the beta). I'm not as rabid a gamer as he, I'd rather just spend my computer time sometimes working on my personal programming/networking projects. But I adore the exploratory aspects of MMORPGs and games such as Morrowind (wide expansive landscapes), some killing or even a lot (I have a few female friends who are rapid GTAers, me, I do "GTA: Morrowind" at times to alleviate stress, working on my goal of strategically eradicating the 3k+ named NPCs in the game), and some people prefer to focus on the RP aspects of MMORPGs. Everyone looks for different things in a game, both guys and girls, and I think the guy who originally asked the question should probably get to know his girl better and her preferences and maybe suggest games she could play to occupy some of the time he won't be around. Not try to get her to play just to say they are doing something "together" and "communicating." Girls are people too, k?
In addition to other modes of communication, playing a game together would really help create that shared experience, but do not think that you can REPLACE the phone conversations. I would suggest that if she is not a gamer, you should find a long list of different types of games to suggest. There are sites for board games to be played online too if she's not keen on FPS or RPG styles.
I hope you're not pretending to be evil while secretly being good. That would be dishonest.
More importantly if she leaves you, does she get 1/2 of your online house and your pet wolf?
one tip, though: have characters that you only play when you and your girlfriend are *together*, so you stay at pretty much the same levels. you would not believe how boring a good game can become when your friend is "letting you level" by bringing you to some place *they* feel is fun, and letting you get kills from a distance. ruined dungeon siege for me.
What ever you do, DON'T send her an XBox! That will just attract guys to her dorm! It would get you off the "talking-hook", but it will eventually rob you of all other "benefits" of having a girlfriend. ;-)
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Anyway, the point is, things were great until we had to actually spend time together. We were fine in cyberspace, or just virtually for that matter. But once we spent time together for more than a week at a time the dynamics changed, and we found we had less going for us than we expected.
So, my second point is, don't substitute a virtual relationship for a real one. It makes a huge difference dating a person in town where geography allows for more frequent visits.
My final point is, don't take things too seriously until you spend a significant time together. Cyber/LDR relationships can give a fals sense of well-being.
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Back off dude. If we stick together they'll never know the difference.